Chapter 17

Deep in Shu Yuan’s memory, Chen Zai was tall and thin, with thick black hair. His blue laborer’s clothes were so oversized they looked borrowed, often stained with mud and bits of grass when he returned from gathering herbs in the mountains.

But he was handsome, with clean and graceful facial features, and eyes so dark that it was hard to see through them.

He lived alone in a thatched hut that leaked from all sides. In winter, it was as cold as an ice cellar. The hut had collapsed twice under heavy snow, and in summer, rain poured through it. No one knew how he managed to endure it all.

Once, the original host had brought him a big fish she had fished out from under a thick layer of ice. She saw him standing in front of the hut that had been crushed by a blizzard, surrounded by a world of white. The snow reached up to his calves, yet he stood with his back straight, his figure looking especially lonely from behind.

He was quiet and withdrawn, never interacting with others outside of treating illnesses, but his medical skills were excellent. The members of the production team and the educated youth respected him, yet kept their distance.

Perhaps Shu Yuan was the person he was most familiar with.

After enduring countless hardships to find her on the riverbank, he had held her tightly in the abandoned mill, overcome with emotion and shedding tears of joy. That was the only time he had ever cried.

Pure, devout tears traced down his face, which was smeared with mud and water. The tears of a handsome man must possess some kind of enchantment, and in that moment, both of them lost all reason.

She had thought he was frail and weak, yet that time, his body had been warm, his arms and waist filled with strength.

Back at home, as soon as the door opened, four pairs of eyes turned to Shu Yuan in unison. Li Hongxia was the first to speak. “Whose call was that? It was Xiao Man’s father, wasn’t it?”

Shu Yuan nodded and answered truthfully. “Yes. He’s back in Lucheng. I arranged to meet him at the flagpole at the entrance of Duzhong Park, tomorrow at one thirty.”

She turned to Xiao Man, her tone gentle. “You’ll be seeing your dad tomorrow.”

Xiao Man’s small hands clenched nervously. In his heart, there was only a longing for his mom. As for his dad, that was just a vague and unfamiliar word to him.

What kind of person was his dad?

He hoped he wouldn’t be like Zhang Laocai. In the production team, Die Lai’s father was a lazy good-for-nothing, and Xiao Shitou’s father used to hit his mom. His impression of fathers was extremely poor.

With unease, Xiao Man spoke up. “Mom, will Dad deny me, not like me, or not be willing to pay child support?”

He knew that the most important reason Mom was taking him to meet Dad was to ask for child support. Mom didn’t have a job and was buried in debt. The four of them depended on Grandma’s salary, which wasn’t nearly enough to live on.

Shu Yuan walked over, bent down, and lifted him off the chair with ease, speaking in a light tone. “Xiao Man doesn’t need to worry. Even if Dad refuses to pay child support, Mom is fully capable of earning money to raise you herself.”

Li Hongxia got a headache the moment she heard Shu Yuan boasting. Sure, she had made a bit of money selling lunchboxes, but that was just a clever trick. Once the factory workers grew tired of the gossip surrounding mother and son, who would still crowd around to buy from them?

Besides, even if she wanted to keep running a street stall, she had no supply source.

And honestly, she had never seen anyone who attracted customers just by relying on their own gossip. Ever since bringing Xiao Man back, Shu Yuan had changed quite a bit. At the very least, her skin had grown as thick as a city wall.

Blowing away the tea leaves floating on her enamel mug, Li Hongxia put on her authoritative tone and asked, “Aren’t you going to tell us about Xiao Man’s dad?”

Shu He leaned in close to Shu Yuan, her tone warm and eager. “Second Sister, just tell us. He’s a doctor, right? That’s a decent profession. What about his character?”

Li Hongxia cut in. “Can’t be anything good.”

She didn’t know what kind of entanglement her second daughter had with Xiao Man’s father, but just based on having a child out of wedlock, there were clearly problems on both sides.

No decent person would have a child before getting married!

Shu Yuan didn’t take it to heart. She told them directly, “No matter how curious you are, I’m not going to say anything. If things fall through when I talk to him tomorrow, then Xiao Man’s father will remain a secret. I won’t reveal anything about him.”

Shu He widened her eyes. “Second Sister, what do you mean? I don’t get it.”

Shu Yuan replied casually, “What’s there not to get? It’s just to avoid giving others something to use against me, so they don’t go around gossiping!”

Li Hongxia was surprised. “Oh? You’re afraid of people gossiping about you? Haven’t they talked about you enough already?”

If she had just stayed home quietly with Xiao Man, there wouldn’t have been such a commotion in the factory area and the staff housing compound.

Around eight o’clock, Xiao Man sat on the bed, folding his clothes while discussing with Shu Yuan, “Mom, can you give me a bath tomorrow? I’ve got little ants all over me. You’ve already seen it, but I don’t want Dad to see that I’m dirty.”

He tilted his small head up. “Look, Mom, they’re all over my neck.”

Xiao Man was actually a child who liked to stay clean.

Shu Yuan couldn’t help but laugh. The stove in the house had already been taken out, and it was still quite cold, so conditions weren’t ideal for bathing. Even she only wiped herself down with warm water. Worried Xiao Man would catch a cold, she hadn’t even wiped him down.

She placed the folded clothes on the chair beside her and said with a smile, “Alright, then we’ll go to the bathhouse. Let’s go early in the morning, at that time there’s no one else and the water is clean.”

Shu Yuan was always apprehensive about going to the bathhouse. Everyone there was completely exposed, and the scene was a bit too much for her. But morning was a great time to go, when almost no one was there yet, the big pool hadn’t been used, and the water was still fairly clean.

——

Chen Zai’s grandfather’s old residence was a large, timeworn courtyard house. It had a Ruyi-style entrance, bare ridged rooftops, gray walls and dark tiles. The walls were mottled, the paint peeling, and every structure and furnishing carried an aged air. Yet the scent of traditional Chinese medicine lingered faintly in the air, hinting that the household belonged to a family of Chinese medicine practitioners.

After returning to Lucheng and setting down his luggage, Chen Zai first called Shu Yuan to arrange a meeting. He had barely hung up the phone when someone called him to his grandfather’s study.

Chen Fumi was an elderly traditional Chinese doctor, dressed in a linen, white Chinese-style cross-collar top. He had a refined and elegant appearance. The man himself seemed steeped in the essence of medicinal herbs, as if he had been marinated in them. He reached out with his long, thin hand, picked up a teacup and took a light sip, then spoke calmly and at ease, “The Sheng family knows you’re back and said they want the two families to meet. How about tomorrow evening?”

“Grandpa, I don’t have time,” Chen Zai replied in a flat tone.

Seeing that his grandson lacked enthusiasm, the old man got straight to the point. “Sheng Zhiyi works at a newspaper. She graduated from university two or three years ago and hasn’t had any movement in her marriage prospects. Her parents both work in important departments. The girl is well-educated, well-mannered, and she’s interested in you. You two match well in both looks and profession. Since you’re rarely home, meeting her once will be enough to see her good qualities.”

Chen Zai had mentally prepared himself. Since he rarely returned home, especially with plans to head back to the northwest soon, it was perfectly normal for his grandfather, the only person who truly cared about him, to urge him to marry.

But he didn’t want to go through the motions. Even on matters where there was clear disagreement, he didn’t see the point in pretending to be the dutiful grandson. He spoke bluntly, “If I were still in the countryside, would she still be interested in me?”

During the political movement, Chen Zai had been sent down to a production team because his mother’s relatives were all overseas. At the time, Chen Fumi had come under scrutiny for having treated many so-called “bad elements” and was barely able to protect himself. In the end, he was shielded by someone in high places and allowed to stay in Lucheng.

Back then, Grandpa Chen hadn’t had the ability to bring his grandson back.

Chen Zai’s father had long divorced his mother and had a falling out with Chen Fumi. He had taken his new family and moved to a small town to practice traditional medicine. Other than Chen Zai being sent to the countryside, the rest of the Chen family had not been affected by his mother’s background.

Chen Fumi was at a loss for words, and seeing the conversation was going nowhere, he tried again. “Our two families are well matched. Among the families we associate with, Sheng Zhiyi stands out in every regard…”

Chen Zai stood tall and straight, his tone flat and unwavering. “Back then, Chen Jinzheng and my mom were also a good match.”

Chen Fumi was again at a loss for words, but he wasn’t angered by Chen Zai’s remark. He set down his teacup and sighed with deep regret. “That unfilial son. It’s best not to mention him.”

Aunt Du Kang had been paying attention to the conversation inside. Hearing that things weren’t going well, she entered the room and first scolded Chen Zai for being disrespectful to his grandfather. Then she turned to the old man and said, “Dad, why bother finding Chen Zai a new match? Wasn’t Tao Leshan perfectly fine? She was originally betrothed to Chen Zai in a childhood engagement. When he was sent down to the countryside, she had no choice but to marry someone else. That marriage didn’t go well either. I heard that right after Chen Zai’s political rehabilitation, she divorced her ex-husband. They don’t have any children. Wouldn’t it be nice for them to rekindle their old ties?”

Hearing this, Chen Zai remained composed, but his tone was unfriendly. “Back then, didn’t the Tao family avoid me like the plague? Weren’t you also afraid I’d bring shame on you, Aunt? You don’t need to meddle in my affairs.”

Busybody.

Du Kang hadn’t expected Chen Zai to show her no courtesy at all. Her expression turned awkward and unnatural as she shifted her gaze to Chen Fumi. “Listen to that, old man. Now that he’s become a hospital director, his attitude toward his family is getting more and more aggressive. His own parents won’t care about him, and as his aunt, everything I say is for his own good. What did I say that was wrong? If he hadn’t been sent down, he and Tao Leshan would’ve married long ago. She wouldn’t have ended up with such a bad match!”

Chen Fumi’s brow furrowed. “Let’s not talk about Tao Leshan anymore. When Chen Zai was sent down, her family was the first to distance themselves from us. Besides, Chen Zai is a good unmarried young man. There’s no need for him to marry a divorcée.”

Du Kang wanted to argue further, but Chen Zai had already cut off the conversation decisively. “I’m very busy with work. I don’t have time to think about starting a family, and I’m not in the mood for it either. You don’t need to worry about me. Grandpa, I still have things to do.”

The atmosphere in the room had turned unpleasant. Chen Fumi had no desire to continue the conversation and waved his hand. “Go on, then.”

Chen Zai immediately left the main study and went to his room on the west side.

——

The next morning, before going to the bathhouse, the mother and son first went to the supply and marketing cooperative. They bought two enamel washbasins, each printed with a simple design of a dragon and phoenix bringing prosperity, along with a bar of soap and a towel.

The enamel basins cost two yuan and one mao (2.1 yuan) each, the soap was three mao six (0.36 yuan), and the towel was five mao two (0.52 yuan), totaling a little over five yuan.

They had nearly used up all the ration coupons Li Hongxia had saved. Shu Yuan had no idea how to cut back anymore. There really was nothing left to save.

When they arrived at the entrance of the bathhouse, they handed over their bath tickets and went in. Sure enough, it was just past eight in the morning and there was no one else there. The mother and son practically had the place to themselves.

Shu Yuan didn’t want to take Xiao Man into the women’s bathhouse, so she crouched down and asked, “Xiao Man, can you wash yourself? Just make sure you don’t fall into the big pool.”

Xiao Man nodded firmly. “Of course I can.”

Shu Yuan went straight into the men’s bathhouse, scooped two basins of hot water from the big pool, and had Xiao Man sit in a spot far from the pool and the windows to wash. Once he was settled, she went to the women’s bathhouse.

“Xiao Man, are you there?”

Worried that he might fall into the pool, she called out to him from time to time.

“Mom, I’m here. The ants on my body are really hard to wash off.” Xiao Man was scrubbing and scrubbing with all his might.

This little child was incredibly capable when it came to taking care of himself. He washed thoroughly, came out clean and smelling fresh, dried his hair, got dressed, and went outside to find Shu Yuan.

Shu Yuan patted the soft, fluffy hair on his head and smiled. “Xiao Man smells so good now.”

Back home, holding the washbasin, Shu Yuan immediately cleared out the clutter beneath the narrow single bed and tucked the basin underneath. If Li Hongxia saw that she had bought two new basins at once, she would definitely get scolded again.

After lunch, Shu He grabbed her schoolbag and dashed out. “I’m going to school.”

Li Hongxia urged Shu Yuan and Xiao Man to get going quickly, reminding her, “Don’t ask Xiao Man’s dad for money again. You’ve already asked for big sums more than once, and I feel ashamed on your behalf. Just give Xiao Man to his dad and let him raise him. You should find an honest man to marry and live a decent life. Stop getting yourself into trouble.”

Hearing those words, Xiao Man’s little heart jumped to his throat. His smooth, youthful features immediately tensed up. This was bad. Grandma still wanted to give him to Dad!

He could live without a father, but he didn’t want to be separated from his mother.

Shu Yuan was speechless when she heard that, the corners of her mouth curving into a faint smile. “Mom, you’ve always taught us to be kind. Someone as kind as me shouldn’t go and ruin the life of an honest man.”

Li Hongxia: “……”

That was a whole new definition of kindness.

Shu Yuan turned to Xiao Man. “I won’t give you to anyone. You’re my child.”

Xiao Man’s little heart finally settled back into place. He immediately broke into a sweet smile and thanked her. “Thank you, Mom.”

Shu Yuan gently stroked his soft hair. “It’s only right to raise the child you gave birth to yourself.”

She handed Xiao Man his clean white shoes and had him put them on. It was warm in the afternoon, so the thick winter coat was too much. She dressed him in a corduroy jacket over his sweater. While watching him change, she glanced up at the speechless Li Hongxia and said, “Don’t talk about sending him to his dad in front of the child. It’s upsetting for him.”

Li Hongxia’s throat caught. Shu Yuan’s words were becoming more and more infuriating. Seeing that Shu Yuan was wearing an old jacket, she went to the bedroom to get her a wool coat, but after searching for a while, couldn’t find it. By then, Shu Yuan had already taken Xiao Man and left the house.

“Mom, put me down. My legs are all better now. I can walk on my own.” Xiao Man squirmed in her arms, wanting to get down.

Shu Yuan strode forward briskly. “Carrying you is faster.”

Xiao Man’s little hands clung to her shoulders. “But when we meet Dad, you definitely can’t carry me. You have to let him see that I’m a healthy kid.”

He was very afraid of being disliked, worried that a child who wasn’t healthy would be rejected by his father.

He absolutely had to help Mom successfully “sell” him to Dad.

Shu Yuan found the little boy’s careful thoughts amusing and reached out to rub the top of his head. “Got it.”

Across the street from the park, someone had already been lying in wait. It was Shu He and her little friend. When she saw the man standing under the flagpole, Shu He gasped, her mouth forming a perfect “O.” “No way. That guy’s standing all slouched and sloppy, his hair hanging down to his ears. He looks like a total punk. Could Second Sister’s taste really be that bad?”

Her friend replied, “What’s the rush? Look, he just left.”

The mother and son soon arrived at the entrance of Duzhong Park. The small park sat right along the street, with a steady stream of people coming and going. There was a large open area near the gate. Shu Yuan looked toward the flagpole, but no one was there. But nearby, a tall man caught her attention.

He wore black trousers and a beige trench coat. His leather shoes were spotless, not a speck of dust on them. The mid-length coat accentuated his tall and upright figure. The buttons were undone, his hands tucked casually into his coat pockets. Beneath the coat, the collar of a crisp white shirt peeked out, buttoned neatly all the way to the top, with a sweater in a matching tone faintly visible underneath.

Ever since the movie Manhunt was released, trench coats had become popular in China. It seemed this man was someone who kept up with trends.

But it wasn’t just his sense of style; his looks stood out in the crowd as well. He had thick hair, dark eyebrows that extended toward his temples, eyes like stars, a straight nose, and facial features that were refined and smooth.

Not only was he strikingly handsome and in the prime of his youth, but he also carried a poised and composed maturity, with an air of confidence and vitality.

Objectively speaking, his appearance was on par with that of a movie star. Shu Yuan couldn’t help glancing at him a couple more times. But when he noticed and looked in their direction, she quickly averted her gaze and took Xiao Man’s hand, heading toward the flagpole.

With just a turn of his head, Chen Zai spotted the mother and son.

Shu Yuan’s appearance hadn’t changed much from a few years ago. She was still as radiant and beautiful as ever, naturally graceful.

Truly, people without a care in the world don’t age easily.

Only Xiao Man’s clothes looked new. She herself was wearing an old brown plaid jacket, the same one she had worn for five or six years.

The moment he saw that jacket, all the unpleasant memories surged back at him like a tidal wave.

It hadn’t even been four full years since Xiao Man was born. Altogether, he had given her 2,400 yuan, which averaged out to fifty yuan per month. She was raising Xiao Man and covering her own expenses, but was that really not enough to afford a single new piece of clothing?

He had originally thought that when Shu Yuan saw him, she would walk straight toward him. Who would’ve expected her to act like she didn’t even know him, slightly raising her chin as she held Xiao Man’s hand and walked toward the flagpole. Once there, she stopped and looked around, scanning the passing crowd.

Didn’t recognize him?

How ridiculous.

And yet she still wanted to ask him for child support?

Chen Zai turned his head slightly, shifting his gaze to the other side. He wanted to see how long it would take for Shu Yuan to recognize him.

Seeing the tension on Xiao Man’s smiling face, Shu Yuan chuckled and asked, “Are you nervous about meeting Dad, Xiao Man?”

Xiao Man was nervous. He was afraid his father would dislike him, afraid he wouldn’t be willing to pay child support. But he refused to admit it, his nostrils flaring slightly as he said, “Mom, I’m not nervous. I just smelled the warm scent of spring in the air. It must be coming from the park.”

Shu Yuan pressed her lips together in a smile. According to the book, this boy was supposed to grow up to be a writer or director. No wonder even the way he spoke sounded so flowery and literary.

“Dad’s not going to not show up, right?” Xiao Man asked with a hint of worry.

Shu Yuan replied, “He’s eager to see us. He wouldn’t not come.”

As they waited, a commotion suddenly rose nearby. A panicked voice shouted, “Someone help! Someone’s fainted!”

“Oh no, they’re not breathing!”

“This is bad, someone’s dead!”