Chapter 22

The night was cool as water.

Shen Mofeng, draped in his coat and slipping on his cotton slippers, sat on the threshold of the farmhouse, puffing on one cigarette after another. A string of bright red dried chili peppers hung on the left side of the door frame, while a string of golden corn cobs dangled on the right. Seated in the middle, he resembled a handsome village leader, troubled by disputes over the village pond’s leasing, unable to sleep at night.

Faint sounds of water came from inside House, and Shen Mofeng tilted his head slightly, lost in thought.

The child was taking a bath in his bathroom, filled with his personal belongings…

If he remembered correctly, there seemed to be a pair of confiscated underwear hanging in the bathroom.

Thinking of this, Shen Mofeng instinctively wanted to go in and retrieve the underwear, but then he felt it wasn’t appropriate—there wasn’t even a shower curtain in the so-called bathroom, and opening the door would expose Ye Chen. Shen Mofeng cleared his throat lightly, innocently sat back on the threshold, and couldn’t help but speculate on Ye Chen’s current state of mind.

…

As a few thoughts passed through his mind, Shen Mofeng lowered his head, chuckled with the cigarette in his mouth, then felt himself being shameless and vulgar. He quickly redirected his thoughts and absentmindedly rehearsed the lines for tomorrow’s scenes.

Little did he know, Ye Chen’s mental activities were not something an ordinary mortal like him could fathom!

The poor and with low expectations Teen Idol Ye was currently estimating the value of each squeeze of the shower gel based on the price of the toiletries and the volume of liquid squeezed out, in order to derive a kind of pleasure that only the impoverished could understand…

Squirt… Ye Chen squeezed out some shower gel.

Five yuan for this squeeze.

Squirt, squirt… He squeezed out some shampoo.

Ten yuan for this squeeze.

Ten yuan, five yuan, ten yuan, twenty yuan… Little Fresh Meat ^[1]Teen idol Ye, who had no hope at all, was immersed in the joy of making money just by rubbing against it and couldn’t extricate himself!

As he washed, Ye Chen finally noticed the underwear that Shen Mofeng had left in the bathroom.

This underwear was from a high-end Swiss handmade underwear brand. Its style seemed ordinary, but in reality, each pair cost over a thousand yuan. From the cutting, sewing, to the choice of fabric, every detail was meticulously crafted. It was said that wearing underwear from this brand was like wearing nothing at all; it was so comfortable that the wearer couldn’t even feel its presence. Even during his brief period of wealth last year, Ye Chen couldn’t bear to buy this brand. His most expensive underwear was from CK, costing three to four hundred yuan per pair, and now they were his treasures, reserved to be worn only on the night he lost his virginity.

But Shen Mofeng could casually wear underwear worth over a thousand yuan…

Shen Ge was awesome! Shen Ge was so rich! This was what a truly wealthy person looked like, right?! Ye Chen wiped the water off his face, looked up at Shen Mofeng’s branded underwear, and showed full respect on his face!

Restlessly sitting on the threshold, Shen Mofeng couldn’t even guess what was going on in Ye Chen’s mind, and how his mental activities were unfolding.

…

High-quality toiletries not only brought spiritual pleasure but also visibly improved the skin. The skin, nourished by the products, became smoother like satin. The silky feeling of rubbing against pajamas and bedding brought Ye Chen a night of deep sleep, as blissful as a little cat.

The next morning, Ye Chen woke up to find several divine beast cubs, who had originally been sleeping at the other end of the kang, had somehow all snuggled into his bed. Xuanwu Cub had shrunk to nothing but a shell, lying on his belly; Pulu Cub had transformed back to its original form resembling a clam, using two small clam shells to hold onto the corner of his pajamas; the fluffy Qiongqi, Hou, and Hundun Cubs were cuddled up on either side of his body, making the bed warm and cozy.

Ye Chen’s movement woke the cubs up, and Hou Cub was the first to revert to human form, stretching his rabbit ears and yawning widely.

“Why did you all come to my bed?” Ye Chen pinched Hou Cub’s rabbit ears. “Didn’t I tell you to get used to sleeping on your own?”

Rubbing his eyes, Hou Cub buried his rabbit head in Ye Chen’s arms and said softly, “Gege smells nice.”

Hearing this, Ye Chen grabbed the collar of his pajamas and sniffed.

Based on the remaining amount, he picked up a bottle of Shen Mofeng’s rarely used shower gel, which had a sage scent. It was light but long-lasting, and indeed quite pleasant.

“I’ll prepare breakfast for you… Eat more in the morning; we’ll have to work on the farm later.” Ye Chen scratched his messy hair, walked out of the room to freshen up, and prepared breakfast.

Thanks to the policy of switching from coal to electricity in Beijing, Ye Chen’s courtyard didn’t need to burn coal in winter. Using electricity for heating could save almost half the money. However, even with the savings, the heating expenses were still significant for Ye Chen. Additionally, the crew would be stationed in this outdoor filming location for two months this winter. Therefore, Ye Chen didn’t want to waste money on heating. He turned off the electricity in the courtyard.

Now the courtyard was as cold as an ice cave. The divine beast cubs all went to the filming location to get warm. During the day, Ye Chen would go for filming, and the cubs would sit together on the warm kang, watching cartoons on the tablet. At night, Ye Chen would sleep on one end of the kang, and the cubs would sleep on the other.

The most miserable creatures in the courtyard this winter were the sixty chickens. Although spirit chickens were more resistant to the cold than ordinary chickens, they were still warm-blooded animals. Even if they didn’t freeze to death, their egg production would be affected. As a precaution, after moving the filming location, Ye Chen had all the chickens collectively moved into the wing of House and borrowed several hot water bottles from the production manager. They were filled with boiling water twice a day and placed in the wing to keep the spirit chickens warm.

After freshening up, Ye Chen carried a basket of sweet potatoes and corn to the kitchen from his room.

Not every farmhouse they rented out provided meals. It would be too chaotic if everyone did things differently; what one family did, the other might not. Therefore, the production manager arranged for several households specifically responsible for cooking for the crew. At meal times, everyone in the crew would gather to eat communal meals. The farmhouse where Ye Chen stayed didn’t provide meals, so he could use the kitchen.

Ye Chen was quite clever; apart from his academic studies, he learned things quickly. After trying his hand at making a fire with firewood yesterday, he was quite proficient today. The fire in the stove blazed fiercely, and Ye Chen cracked eggs along the edge of the stove. He held the front end of the eggshell with his long index and middle fingers, and the back end with his thumb and ring finger, skillfully separating them, causing the egg yolk to splatter into the oil-glistening iron pot, eliciting a cheerful sizzle.

He fried a dozen eggs in one go, steamed a pot of corn, and used the juicer he borrowed from Xiao He to juice the corn. While the fire in the stove was still burning hot, he used tongs to pick up the remaining half-basket of sweet potatoes and threw them into the fire to roast.

The communal meal wasn’t as easy to share as boxed lunches, so when Ye Chen prepared a small stove for Shen Mofeng, he also prepared portions for the divine beast cubs and himself.

After breakfast, Ye Chen first delivered a tray to the divine beast cubs, then carried another to find Shen Mofeng.

Young Master Shen took baths both in the morning and evening. When Ye Chen entered the room, Shen Mofeng had just finished drying his hair, emitting a scent of sage that matched Ye Chen’s.

Ye Chen sniffed and played the role of a well-behaved young wife, saying, “Shen Ge, breakfast is ready. The sweet potatoes have just been roasted, be careful not to burn yourself.”

On the low table on the kang were two identical plates, each with two fried eggs. The egg whites were lightly crispy, with the golden yolks surrounded by them like a pale golden skirt. In another large plate lay four roasted sweet potatoes, their skins hardened, oozing transparent syrup underneath. Shen Mofeng used chopsticks to peel open one of the sweet potatoes, revealing the glistening honey juice coating the golden flesh. As he prodded it with his chopsticks, a sweet aroma and steam rose up, dissipating into the air as faint white vapor. Two identical blue porcelain bowls held freshly squeezed corn juice, thick and creamy after a stir with a spoon.

Ye Chen had brought their portions because he had spent the previous night earnestly crafting a brief bio for his fake persona and discovered that one of the character’s hobbies was to eat with his most admired idol, Shen Mofeng. Eating luxury food in the city together was fine, but not accompanying him to eat plain food in the countryside might ruin the character’s image! After all, with his character, as long as he could appreciate Shen Mofeng’s exquisite charm, he could even mistake a radiator for a biscuit.

As Ye Chen was about to start eating on the kang, Shen Mofeng suddenly pulled out his phone. “Wait a moment.”

“…Are you taking pictures?” Ye Chen was surprised.

He didn’t recall Shen Mofeng having the habit of taking photos before meals.

“Yeah.” Shen Mofeng gave a lazy smile and snapped a photo of their shared breakfast on the low table, then bowed his head to post it on Weibo.

Ye Chen: “…”

Why is my Shen Ge acting like a social media influencer lately, taking photos of everything he eats and posting them on Weibo?

On Weibo:

Shen Mofeng: Breakfast made by the little friend’s hands. @Ye Chen

The ever-growing fanbase of the ShenYe CP immediately flooded the comments section with sugar.

【?? Are you two living like newlyweds now? Sorry for interrupting.】

【This is Xiao Chen Chen, the treasure that mama cherishes and holds dearly! How dare you cook and light fires for some wild man outside! Mama is devastated! Mama’s heart is shattered! QAQ】

【Oh my, this heated kang. [doge]】

Ye Chen picked up a roasted sweet potato and ate it while scrolling through the comments, feeling somewhat troubled. He muttered, “These people really…”

Before he could finish his sentence, he suddenly came across a comment like this:

A certain fan of the ShenYe CP: “Tsk tsk tsk, why do I feel Chen Chen is acting like the new daughter-in-law of the Shen family? So virtuous.”

And beneath this comment was Shen Mofeng’s reply: “Hehe… kind of.”

Ye Chen: “…”

…Did I accidentally feed my Shen Ge something poisonous?!

“Shen Ge, what’s with this reply?” Ye Chen chuckled awkwardly.

Shen Mofeng chuckled lightly, “Just kidding, it’s just a little like that… What’s wrong?”

“No-nothing!” Ye Chen shook his head and waved his hands, feeling a slight warmth on his cheeks, “It’s just, when you make a joke like that, they’ll start flooding the comments section again…”

Shen Mofeng smiled faintly, neither cold nor warm, and with a subtle tone reminiscent of an old married couple bringing up past grievances, he said, “I seem to remember you saying you liked being tied with me in the comments… Changed your mind?”

“No!” Ye Chen was taken aback, surprised that Shen Mofeng still remembered the offhand comment from last time. He quickly tried to butter up, “Of course not! I love being tied with you in the comments, I even… I can’t get enough of it…”

At this moment, the comments section of Ye Chen’s Weibo was completely overrun, with millions of CP fans crossing the river like an army, storming in.

【Come see the daughter-in-law of the Shen family. [doge]】

【You’re now the daughter-in-law of the Shen family, do you know about this yourself?】

【The daughter-in-law is really handsome.】

Three hours later, the top trending hashtag was: #ShenFamilyDaughter-in-law#

The author has something to say:

Ye Qiongqiong’s account book today:

Today’s income: a dollop of shower gel + a dollop of shampoo + a dollop of essence + a dollop of body lotion

Today’s expenses: several sweet potatoes + several corns + several eggs (due to the expansion of the vegetable garden, being generous, no need to count anymore)

Shen Mofeng’s account book today:

– Made breakfast for me.

Shen Mofeng’s favorability: +10

Current favorability: 10/500, three stars (Although Chen Chen didn’t do much today, let’s reluctantly add 10, after all, this old man isn’t a devil)

Shen Mofeng: Even with my toes, I can tell who Chen Chen entered the entertainment industry for. (For money)

Shen Mofeng: Even with my toes, I can tell whose photos Chen Chen looks at on his phone with sighs. (He’s looking at Lamborghini tractors)

Shen Mofeng: Even with a single strand of hair, I can tell how shy Chen Chen gets when he sees my underwear hanging in the bathroom. (Not shy, but reverent)

Ye Qiongqiong: ? Shen Ge, how about trying to use your brain for a change?

Just to make sure everyone remembers, emphasizing once again, this is a fictional setting~ It’s a society that’s very tolerant of homosexuality, where LGBTQ+ movies can be publicly released, and an artist coming out doesn’t affect their future~ (For the convenience of sprinkling dog food… and to avoid writing the hassle of coming out hhhh. Anyway it’s all silly and sweet, so let’s just relax to the end!)

TN:

Okay so here’s the thing, I’ve been translating using my work laptop during my free periods of time during the day, but they’ve installed some sort of remote manager on the laptops that enables the management track all activities from the user. They did this because we work remotely and with sensitive data. It’s partly for security purposes and partly to make sure we spend our time as we should. So unfortunately I won’t be able to translate on weekdays and as such the schedule will change from Mon, Wed & Friday to Sat or Sun for the rest of this month and in August. I hope to get a personal laptop in September and return to the previous schedule.

I’m looking for a volunteer proofreader for this novel! If you’re interested, hit me up on Discord.