Chapter 46

Shang Mingbao’s feelings might not be clear to Wen Youyi, but it’s obvious whom she doesn’t like.

Love brings brightness and makes one’s breathing lighter… Since Wen Youyi could tell that Wu Boyan liked her, it was just as evident that she didn’t like him.

“Babe was distracted the entire evening. If the person she liked was there, would she have been like that?” Wen Youyi pondered for a moment, feeling a bit at a loss, “But, she really did go to see her crush tonight.”

Judging by the way Shang Mingbao returned, with her face flushed, eyes dodging, and feigning calmness while clearly flustered, Wen Youyi knew she had done something she shouldn’t have. But Shang Mingbao was soaked in a soft kind of happiness, one that was solid and full, not the kind brought by superficial pleasures. Wen Youyi concluded that she had indeed gone on a date, and that Wu Boyan was covering for her.

Could it be… one of his friends?

Wen Youyi became engrossed in her thoughts, completely unaware that her husband’s emotions were like a roller coaster. He hadn’t even had time to catch his breath before plunging into an even greater unknown crisis.

What? She went to see her crush tonight? Her crush is really in New York? How could there be any good men in New York!

The taxi drove through the city and finally stopped in front of an apartment building on West 96th Street. By that time, Xiang Feiran had already fallen asleep again.

The fare on the meter was shockingly high. He paid the driver, and as he was about to get out of the car, the Mexican driver couldn’t help but glance at him in the rearview mirror, giving him a meaningful smile. “Hey bro, I really envy you for having a girlfriend who lives on the Upper East Side.”

Xiang Feiran: “…”

He was being mistaken for a kept man.

As he tucked his empty wallet into his pocket, he casually replied, “Indeed.”

As soon as he was away from Shang Mingbao, the tension in his body dissipated, and the effects of the alcohol quickly overwhelmed what little rationality he had left. While showering, hazy flashes of intense moments from the night crossed his mind.

Was it real? Or just a dream?

It wasn’t until he lay back in bed and they exchanged goodnights that Xiang Feiran finally let his guard down, tossed aside his phone, and fell into a deep sleep.

The next day, he slept until noon, waking up with a splitting headache. He hadn’t bothered to close the curtains the night before, and now the midday sunlight poured in, gradually bringing him back to life.

Wait… what exactly did he do last night?

Xiang Feiran slowly placed an arm over his forehead, his brow furrowing more and more.

Did he make her cry again? And how did he comfort her?

“With his lower body,” he remembered.

Xiang Feiran coughed violently and suddenly sat up in bed, pacing around the room while covering his mouth, coughing several more times.

No way, that couldn’t possibly be something he said.

He remembered calling her “baby,” more than once.

He remembered holding her hand, leading her downward?

Xiang Feiran propped himself up against the edge of his desk, head bowed, breathing deeply. Although he wanted to deny it, his body seemed to have already memorized the softness and delicacy of her touch, leaving him no room to argue.

It was a hundred times more pleasurable than doing it himself.

What else?

Xiang Feiran’s mouth went dry as he recalled the events, so he reached for a bottle of water. After taking a few sips, the memories slowly came back to him.

Last night, he drank her more than once.

With a “crack,” the plastic bottle was crushed in his hand, spilling mineral water all over the back of his hand.

“…”

Xiang Feiran looked down at it with an expressionless face.

Great, this feeling wasn’t unfamiliar either.

That’s enough. He decided to stop thinking about it and instead shifted his focus to some basic household chores to distract himself.

He packed up the dirty clothes and took them to the laundry room downstairs, inserted some coins, and clicked start.

The hum of the dryer and the washing machine blended into a white noise that left his mind blank.

His memories abruptly stopped at the image in front of the dryer. At that time, she had no strength left to stand, completely naked, sitting in his lap, almost voiceless.

His fingers were deep inside her, reaching the most dangerous edge.

When Fang Suining called, his cousin had already been self-isolating in the laundry room for half an hour, arms crossed, sitting with a stern face, eyes closed, and his eyebrows furrowed as if he were undergoing some kind of penance… Other residents who came to do their laundry thought he was mentally unstable.

“Hello.”

“Uh…” Fang Suining was so startled by how quickly he answered the phone that she forgot what she was going to say for a moment.

“Oh right… New Year’s Day is coming up soon. Do you have any plans? How about we grab a meal together?”

“I have a performance.”

“Oh,” Fang Suining wasn’t surprised by his answer at all. “Alright then…”

“Wait.”

“Huh?”

“Let’s talk a little more.”

“Huh…?”

Fang Suining was forced to chat with him for half an hour, during which she recounted in detail the three times she broke up and got back together with her boyfriend. Finally, when she ran out of things to say, she asked, “Cousin, can I borrow some money?”

Both being down on their luck, she had been insisting on dropping out to study drama in France, resulting in a three-month standoff with her family. The day she reunited with Shang Mingbao was also the day her family gave her a final ultimatum. After that, they cut off her card and all financial support, leaving her to live on her meager savings.

Fang Suining had borrowed money from Xiang Feiran before. Xiang Feiran had a generous full scholarship, a good salary from his job, and was single, so lending out a few hundred bucks wasn’t difficult.

She pleaded, “Lend me five hundred bucks for food. The kind you don’t expect to be paid back.”

Xiang Feiran thought about his recent expenses and balance, “I don’t have five hundred, but I can give you fifty.”

Fang Suining: “…”

Is this an insult?

“Do you want it or not?”

“Yes, yes, yes!”

“…”

The two cousins were silent for a while on the phone, then asked in unison, “How did you end up this broke?”

Fang Suining yelled, “I can understand my situation! But you? Aren’t you supposed to be making good money? You don’t even have a girlfriend to support! How much could Marlboros possibly cost? How many packs can you smoke in a month?”

Xiang Feiran replied calmly, “I’m supporting someone.”

Fang Suining: “Supporting who? Supporting a little turtle who—”

Hmm? Hmmm?

Fang Suining’s eyes widened, and her brain slowly started to overheat.

“I’m going to tell Grandpa—”

“I’ll lend you five hundred, shut up.”

After a while, she saw that her account had five hundred dollars credited. Fang Suining was delighted for a moment, then did the math: wait, she initially wanted to borrow five hundred, then it became fifty, and now it’s five hundred again, but in exchange, she had to give up one of her secrets…?

Fang Suining logged onto Instagram, trying to find some clues on her cousin’s social account.

Xiang Feiran’s profile picture was of a green forest, and he never posted anything personal. He only updated three sets of plant-related photos every week, occasionally posting one or two close-ups of botanical illustrations. He didn’t use tags or captions, so he had few followers and interactions.

Fang Suining racked her brain trying to imagine what kind of girl Xiang Feiran might like. She psyched herself up before checking his following list, fearing she’d accidentally come across an account of a busty influencer or a Kardashian-type with an hourglass figure. While those are fine, they couldn’t be the type of person Xiang Feiran liked! Otherwise, she wouldn’t know how to face him!

In her mind, she had pre-set his other half as a cold, highly intelligent female scientist. But… sheesh, he only followed Shang Mingbao after all!

–

The cold, highly intelligent female scientist Shang Mingbao got out of the Bentley at 2:10 PM on New Year’s Eve.

She had a tall and slim figure, a lean face with sharp features, and wore a simple low ponytail. She was dressed in a cream-colored long leather coat, baguette jeans, and brown pointed-toe boots. Her makeup-free face was accentuated by metal earrings on either side of her earlobes, making her skin look fair and bright. Her life revolved around the results of her experiments, so unlike the plain, unkempt image one might imagine, every inch of her was meticulously cared for.

“New York’s weather is so much better than Boston’s.” Shang Mingbao’s first words were this, as she removed her sunglasses and hugged her family one by one.

Seizing the opportunity, she leaned close to Shang Mingbao’s ear and asked, “Is the doctor coming tonight?”

Shang Mingbao looked nervous and whispered, “Of course not. Don’t give it away.”

Xiang Feiran hadn’t come to see her in the past few days; they only chatted online, sometimes video-calling. He had resumed his evening performances and needed to rehearse with the band for new songs, so his schedule had suddenly become busy. Every time they video-called, the lighting on his end was always dim, either in a narrow alley behind a bar or in the corridor of some rehearsal room. He would chat with her under the pretense of stepping out for a smoke.

They agreed to chat only as long as it took for him to finish his cigarette, but once he finished, he didn’t mention hanging up. Shang Mingbao would deliberately ask, “The cigarette’s done, aren’t you leaving?

He said, “Have another one.”

Though he said so, he didn’t actually light up a second one, keeping his gaze fixed on the screen where she appeared, saying nothing, his lips naturally curved.

The time he spent accompanying her remotely was getting longer, causing the band members to start worrying if he was hiding out and using drugs.

He smiled and shook his head in denial, though he knew it was no different from drug use.

Family reunions were the closest thing to celebrating the holidays and the New Year.

The Christmas tree was still lit, and the evergreen decorations were still vibrant, while the soft furnishings in the room had already been replaced with new ones. The red and gold intermingled in a warm, tasteful way, avoiding vulgarity. Several housekeepers were meticulously managing the house and the New Year’s Eve festivities.

By dinner time, blessing texts began to ring incessantly from everyone’s phones.

Shang Mingbao received a blessing text from Fang Suining and called her back.

Fang Suining, who had no money and had kicked her boyfriend for the twenty-sixth time, spent this New Year’s Eve a bit miserably, going alone to a convenience store to buy a meal and beer.

In the cold wind, she sniffed and loudly wished Shang Mingbao a happy holiday and a successful new year.

Shang Mingbao could tell from her tone that something was off and asked if she wanted to come over for dinner. Fang Suining tactfully declined, saying she was going to Times Square to celebrate the New Year with classmates, though it was already late and she wasn’t sure if she could still get a good spot to watch the New Year’s Eve ball drop.

The midnight ball drop at Times Square had become a signature New Year’s Eve event in New York, with hundreds of thousands of confetti bursting from above, drifting through the glittering electronic billboards and the massive crowd of ordinary people.

Fang Suining said she was determined to squeeze in this year because she had written her wishes on the confetti, which should now be collected on the top floor of the square. She wanted to witness the moment her dreams floated away.

Holding two cans of beer, she said, “Well, I’m not the worst off. Xiang Feiran was much worse than me before.”

“…Really?” Shang Mingbao asked as if casually.

“Yes, he never celebrates holidays.”

“Even New Year’s Eve?”

“He does celebrate New Year’s Eve, but for him, it doesn’t make much difference,” Fang Suining replied, somewhat forgetting whether she had mentioned his background to Shang Mingbao, “At most, he just makes a few calls to me and my grandfather. His father already has his third family.”

“What about his mother?”

Fang Suining was taken aback by the question. It turned out she hadn’t discussed this with Shang Mingbao. She laughed and awkwardly changed the subject, “Is it not a bit inappropriate to talk about these things on a day like today? Haha.”

Her awkwardness made Shang Mingbao suddenly understand, though he also seemed not to, and his heart sank.

After hanging up, Fang Suining went to pay at the counter and smirked. Her grandfather was already in his seventies; if one day he were gone, Xiang Feiran would be left with no parents or direct relatives. Only she, his carefree cousin, would remain. But she didn’t have much time to care about him. On the day her grandfather was gone, would there still be anyone in this world who cared about him?

Fang Suining often wondered if Xiang Feiran’s solitary nature was a large-scale rehearsal for his future. He knew he would spend most of his later years alone, so he started familiarizing himself with it from the age of sixteen. You see, geniuses always prepare ahead.

Once, she jokingly said, “Feiran, you won’t wait until you’re old and then run off to the mountains to die among the flowers and plants, right? How would I find you then?”

Xiang Feiran calmly told her that if that day ever came, he would send her the geographical coordinates in advance.

Before leaving the convenience store, Fang Suining pulled the tab on a can of beer and eagerly took a big sip.

The sky over Manhattan was always not completely dark because the city was too bright. She looked up at the pale gray sky and exhaled. Honestly, she was a bit thankful to the girlfriend of the never-met Xiang Feiran because she managed to awaken what little love instincts he had left.

It was time for dinner, so Shang Mingbao put down her phone.

Family dinners were always at a round table, with a grand crystal chandelier hanging overhead, illuminating all the silverware and china with a sparkling glow. Under the chandelier, Shang Mingbao slowly looked at her father, mother, and older sister, which were her family members. Soon, her older brother, older sister, and younger brother would also video call in.

She had a lively family, billions in wealth, and, surprisingly, such happiness. There were no hidden conflicts or superficial relationships, and no domestic quarrels. Everyone’s heart was genuine, more real than diamonds or gold.

She lived on such a great stroke of luck.

Shang Mingbao suddenly felt her eyes well up after her mother, Wen Youyi, returned her smile and gaze.

After knowing him for so long, she had never thought about Xiang Feiran’s family. She didn’t know if his grandparents were alive, if his mother had started a new family, or if anyone was by his side during the holidays. When he sent her off at the airport and said, “Don’t let your parents wait too long,” she took it for granted and didn’t ask if his parents would come to see him.

The rare family reunion, the last meal of the year, took over two hours.

The fireplace blazed warmly, the fresh flowers in the vase were still dripping with freshness, and the velvet sofa embroidered with flowers and birds surrounded the coffee table. The wall-mounted TV was continuously broadcasting news, showing highlights of New Year’s Eve events from various places, while the scrolling text at the bottom announced fireworks displays across New York.

The bar was packed tonight; even before eight o’clock, people were already queuing to get in, and the interior was extremely noisy.

How could someone in a band feel lonely? Several of the band members’ girlfriends brought friends to the bar for New Year’s Eve, so the small backstage area was often crowded with inebriated people, everyone wishing “Happy New Year.” Because he was a “mute,” Xiang Feiran’s silence didn’t stand out much; when someone cheered him, he would just raise his beer bottle to clink with theirs.

At eight o’clock, Xiang Feiran found an excuse to step away and made a call to Xiang Lianqiao in the back alley.

It was already New Year’s Day in China, and the morning light was bright. When Xiang Lianqiao was still in office, holidays like these were so busy that he barely had time to breathe. Now retired, he enjoyed the peaceful pleasure of sitting in his study, listening to the birds and talking on the phone with him.

Xiang Lianqiao asked what he was doing tonight, and Xiang Feiran told him he was going to Times Square with his group to watch the ball drop. At that moment, he was sitting in a taxi.

Xiang Lianqiao fondled the morning paper folded on his lap and took off his glasses. “You’re lying to your grandpa again.”

Xiang Feiran smiled and put out his cigarette. “You saw through me. I couldn’t bear to take a taxi; I’m walking to the subway.”

“It’s so cold in New York in winter, and you’d rather freeze there than come back to see your grandpa.”

“I’ll come back in the spring. There’s a project, and I’ve already scheduled the time.”

Xiang Lianqiao’s former juniors and students, now all over the place, were calling and texting him. Xiang Lianqiao had little time to himself. Before hanging up, he reminded Xiang Feiran to persuade Fang Suining.

Xiang Feiran laughed, “Why persuade him? Even though Suining is a bit foolish, he’s a smart person.”

After hanging up, Xiang Feiran finished the last bit of his cigarette. Once, Xiang Lianqiao had discovered some signs and took rare time off from his work to come to the school, asking if he had developed a smoking habit. He said no, and Xiang Lianqiao advised him to take care of his health, saying smoking was fine but only after he turned eighteen. After that, he left hurriedly with his assistant.

It was a small matter, but it vaguely crossed Xiang Feiran’s mind at that moment. The weather that day, Xiang Lianqiao’s formal attire—he remembered it so clearly. Time had passed.

The city’s hustle and bustle felt like a distant echo, emphasizing the quiet corner where Xiang Feiran was. He discarded the cigarette butt and returned to the bar.

After performing for half the night, during the break, he saw a message from Shang Mingbao. Xiang Feiran went out to return her call.

It wasn’t that he hadn’t wanted to call her earlier, but he had been away from a family gathering for so long that he no longer remembered what a complete family would be doing at this time. In short, he imagined they were very busy. He was afraid of disturbing her, making her seem lonely.

Shang Mingbao answered quickly.

“Did you finish dinner with your family?” Xiang Feiran asked.

“Yes.” Without waiting for him to ask, Shang Mingbao described in detail what they had eaten that night, which dish was especially delicious.

Xiang Feiran listened quietly and, after she finished, smiled, “Did you drink?”

“Just a little.” Shang Mingbao replied obediently, “Mom and Dad are here, so I didn’t dare drink too much.”

She asked him how the performance went. Xiang Feiran said the band members had drunk too much and there were some minor issues, like hitting the wrong notes or being off-key, but besides him, it seemed no one noticed. In the face of happiness, mistakes seemed unimportant.

“What about next? What do you plan to do?” Xiang Feiran asked.

Shang Mingbao sniffled, “Going to see the ball drop. On the way to Times Square, it’s so congested.”

Xiang Feiran was taken aback and shook his head with a smile. “So, everyone is heading to Times Square tonight?”

He would be performing until midnight, and might not be free afterward, so he said in advance, “Happy New Year, babe.”

Shang Mingbao glanced at Shang Mingzhuoo sitting next to her, covered the microphone with her hand, and said, “Not this one, that one. The one from that night.”

Xiang Feiran paused and softly repeated, “Happy New Year, my dear.”

He asked, “Do you have any New Year’s wishes?”

As long as it was within his ability, he would do his best.

Shang Mingbao couldn’t think of one for a moment. If it had been a month ago, she would have wished for the master to calculate again the secret of a life spent spending more money and being happier, but now, she had completely forgotten about that.

She thought for a moment, “I hope we don’t break up in the New Year.”

Shang Mingzhuoo glanced at her with some surprise, seemingly not understanding her wish.

On the other end of the line, Xiang Feiran’s breath suddenly caught. He hadn’t spoken for a long time, and his frowning brow relaxed as his heart softened. In the moonlight, his smile was gentle, “Don’t waste a wish. We won’t break up in the New Year. No need to wish for it.”

They talked until the alarm Xiang Feiran had set went off. He had to go back to prepare for the next performance and said, “Enjoy your holiday. See you after the festival.”

Shang Mingbao thought to herself, “See you soon.”

The Bentley was quiet for a while. The long red taillights were lit up. Someone honked, causing a chain reaction.

Shang Mingzhuoo couldn’t stand the traffic in Manhattan and jokingly asked, “Can we get there before midnight?”

To be honest, she wasn’t interested in the bar or the band, but when the words “Xiang Bo” and “drums” were combined, they created a strange chemical reaction: it was weird, but she wanted to see it.

With her sister’s cover, Shang Mingbao left the house openly and headed straight for 21N in downtown.

There was a long line at the entrance. Through the passage leading to the basement, she could vaguely hear the sounds of the performance inside.

Shang Mingbao found two people who had just gotten tickets and offered them $5,000 each, hoping they would exchange their tickets for hers.

The security guard glanced sideways at her, and when she handed him a $200 tip, he nodded and wished her a good night.

As soon as she entered the bar, she was warmly enveloped by the sound waves of the live performance.

A classic English rock song had reached the halfway point. The crowd in the venue gently swayed, and the warm orange light bathed the scene like a sunset over the sea.

“Tender is night lying by your side

Tender is the touch of someone that you love too much”

Shang Mingzhuo recognized Xiang Feiran on stage at a glance.

He wasn’t wearing a mask during his normal performances. As this song had a gentle drumbeat, he lowered his head slightly, his face mostly obscured by the cymbals. When his face did appear, it seemed to have a unique aura of its own—absent-minded, slightly distracted, his half-closed eyes always lazily swaying to the melody.

No one noticed that, at a certain point in the lyrics, his lips parted slightly, as if softly singing along.

“oh my baby

oh my baby

oh why

oh mine…”

Shang Mingzhuo kept her hands in her coat pockets and shook her head.

Seeing is believing.

She turned to her sister, her expression softening.

She remained standing there, not introducing anyone or showing excitement, and she didn’t move with the waitstaff.

She was simply waiting, waiting for that one special gaze to cross the crowd and shine upon her amidst the joyful festivities.