Chapter 68

Early summer, the twilight light was fading, blending with the noisy signs and accents of Flushing’s streets, giving Fang Suining a brief sense of mental disorientation.

She glanced at Shang Mingbao beside her, then at Xiang Feiran, who had just crossed the crosswalk. Shaking her head, she confirmed it was not four years ago.

In just a few meters, Xiang Feiran quickly arrived. As he lifted his leg to step onto the mosaic pavement, he casually tossed his coffee cup into the trash can and then gave Fang Suining a brief nod. It was a lazy gesture, and his gaze, more indifferent than his action, had already shifted to Shang Mingbao before Fang Suining could respond.

Fang Suining: “…”

Hey!

“Where’s your girlfriend?” Fang Suining looked around, searching for her.

“Hmm?” Xiang Feiran slightly raised his eyes and began to speak, “My girlfriend—”

“Yeah, Feiran-gege—” Shang Mingbao took the initiative, raising her voice and desperately signaling him with her eyes, “Where’s your girlfriend?”

Xiang Feiran: “…”

Here it comes again.

Under Fang Suining’s slightly doubtful yet puzzled gaze, Xiang Feiran sighed softly and said, “She was here just now, but she’s gone now.”

Fang Suining: “Huh?”

Xiang Feiran’s expression remained unchanged: “She broke up with me on the way here.”

What’s this about?

Fang Suining’s mouth hung open: “Isn’t it a bit too calm for her to just leave like that? Are you sure you don’t need to… go after her?”

“It’s fine,” Xiang Feiran glanced at Shang Mingbao and said indifferently, “I’m used to it; she does this often.”

Shang Mingbao, who had just tried to sneak away, was called back by Fang Suining’s remark: “Then babe, why don’t you join us for dinner!” She waved her phone, “I was about to message you to ask if you were coming, but I was afraid it might be inconvenient.”

Xiang Feiran nodded: “It’s fine. Long time no see, Shang Mingbao.”

Shang Mingbao awkwardly waved: “Y-yeah, long time no see, Feiran-gege…”

Xiang Feiran stood with his hands in his pockets, paused for a moment, and said, “You’ve become more beautiful.”

Fang Suining: “?”

What? Your girlfriend can’t be that far gone!

Shang Mingbao was regretting her actions deeply. How could someone be like this! It would have been fine if he acted like he didn’t know her. Why drag out so many details? This was even harder to bear than if he had been straightforward! In front of Fang Suining, her face was as red as if she had an allergic reaction.

Fang Suining wasn’t stupid and looked at Xiang Feiran with suspicion: “After such a long time, why do you act like you’re so familiar with her?”

Indeed.

Xiang Feiran casually thought for a moment and replied nonchalantly, “Maybe it’s because ‘babe’ has always been in my heart and never really left.”

Fang Suining’s mouth slowly formed an “O” shape.

Huh?

Huh???

Is this something her cousin would say?

Shang Mingbao’s ears turned completely red, stammering, “My friend is still waiting for me, so, um, I…”

“Is your friend standing you up?” Xiang Feiran tapped the screen a couple of times with one hand and then tilted his chin up slightly, “Want to check?”

Since he said so, Shang Mingbao had no choice but to pretend to check her phone. She found a message from Xiang Feiran on WhatsApp that read: “Don’t leave.”

“…”

Under Fang Suining’s inquiring and hopeful gaze, Shang Mingbao put her phone away, forcing a calm demeanor, “Yes… he stood me up too.”

Everyone seemed content, but Fang Suining thought things were progressing a bit too smoothly.

The empty table inside the restaurant was cleared, and the waiter came to seat them.

As Fang Suining chatted with the waiter in a familiar manner, Xiang Feiran and Shang Mingbao lagged behind.

“Playing hide-and-seek?” he called out to her.

Shang Mingbao clenched her fists and whispered, “I’m leaving.”

Turning to leave, she was turned back by Xiang Feiran, who grabbed her arm and spun her around. His clearly defined hand pressed gently on the back of her neck: “Why are you hiding? I’ll help you.”

Shang Mingbao: “…”

Fang Suining had initially wanted to eat Chongqing hotpot, but since she had a mouth ulcer, they ended up at an old-style Beijing copper pot restaurant. She had heard from classmates that this place was very authentic, with clean ingredients and delicious lamb.

Shang Mingbao had never tried the old-style Beijing copper pot before and didn’t know how to prepare the condiments, so Xiang Feiran helped her with that.

Barely two seconds after sitting down, under Fang Suining’s stern gaze, Xiang Feiran had to get up again… resignedly preparing a portion for his cousin as well.

Fang Suining happily tasted the sesame paste, “Hmm, having a relationship really makes a difference, even dogs have a service attitude now.”

Xiang Feiran poured tea for everyone and glanced at her, “You weren’t so polite when you borrowed money from me.”

Feeling guilty for accepting help, Fang Suining changed the topic, “Can you still afford to support a girlfriend with the money you borrowed from me?”

“Just managing. It’s better if I can pay it back,” Xiang Feiran said casually, “I’m not supporting her; it’s just normal dating expenses.”

Fang Suining whispered to Shang Mingbao, “He’s pretending to be tough, but he’s actually broke. He used to lend me a couple of thousand, and last time he asked if I wanted fifty.”

“Fang Suining,” Xiang Feiran called her name flatly.

Whenever he called her full name, Fang Suining felt a sense of guilt as if she were being called on in class, and she shrank her neck, falling silent.

But having prepared herself to meet his girlfriend, she was thrown off by not finding her, and Fang Suining’s attention was stuck. After a brief chat, she asked again, “What does your girlfriend look like?”

Xiang Feiran smiled slightly, “Why, are you questioning my taste?”

The waiter arrived with the hot pot base, interrupting the conversation. After a while, Fang Suining persisted, “It’s not about questioning, it’s that you’re always hiding things.”

“It’s not that I want to hide it, but I’m afraid you can’t handle it.”

Fang Suining squinted, “What can’t I handle? Unless she’s really not good enough for you, I’m worried for Grandpa.”

“She’s not. She’s more popular than I am.”

Fang Suining raised an eyebrow, extending her tone, “Really?”

Xiang Feiran paused as if he were reflecting on something distant, “She’s beautiful, has good taste, a pleasant personality, isn’t spoiled, sometimes her thinking is a bit unusual, but she’s very lovable, has ideas, thinks things through, and is resilient. She has the ability to make herself happy.”

He smiled and returned from his idle reminiscence, “There’s a lot more, so I feel a lot of pressure and anxiety.”

Shang Mingbao relaxed her grip on her chopsticks, her bright eyes not blinking.

She had never heard him speak like this before. His indifferent demeanor seemed like the surface of Xiang Feiran’s life, always calm to the point of making people think he didn’t care about anything.

So he could be anxious… so he compares himself with others, for her.

Fang Suining was also surprised by his long list of simple but accurate descriptions. After a while, she murmured, “Oh my, Xiang Feiran, you really love her.”

Xiang Feiran looked at Shang Mingbao, his gaze gentle through the swirling steam, “What I say doesn’t count; it’s the feelings of the person involved that matter.”

Fang Suining: “Don’t give me your academic-sounding rhetoric.”

“Okay,” Xiang Feiran’s lips curved slightly, admitting straightforwardly, “I do love her.”

The water boiled, bubbling in the copper pot. As they enjoyed hotpot with the two women, Xiang Feiran took on all the trivial tasks.

The conversation inevitably turned to his move to Boston.

Boston’s atmosphere was completely different from Manhattan’s. Adjusting to the weather, transportation, and ambiance, as well as finding a place to live, were all challenges.

He really liked the apartment on West 96th Street with Simon. The octagonal windows had beautiful sunsets, and the Manhattan skyline had once moved him. The Greenwood Cemetery, High Line Park, various botanical gardens, and the Central Park pond and greenhouse—all these places had witnessed his thoughts during walks. When he was in New York, it felt noisy, but as he was about to leave, he realized how precious it was to him.

If he were to settle down, he would choose New York. New York is a forest of humanity, just as plants thrive in the rainforest, hidden among everything.

Moreover, New York held all his memories of love.

From the beginning, Xiang Feiran hadn’t intended to invest too much emotion or sense of belonging in Boston. Thus, his requirements for housing were simple: convenient commuting, within his affordable range, clean, and in a safe neighborhood.

If he were single, he would rent an entire apartment, but to save money for weekly flights to see Shang Mingbao, he decided to share a rental. He had been scanning the rental information for faculty and international students.

After moving to Boston, part-time work was also an issue.

The consignment at the antique shop was stable income, but the new band required adjustment. Toms, the bassist from 21N, introduced him to a commercial band in Boston, with the only requirement being that he not remain silent anymore.

After suffering a setback at the academic conference, Toms took a week off. According to the lead singer, Toms had a fever for a week and spoke nonsense, and when he reappeared in 21N, he had lost three pounds.

After returning, Toms’s mental state had recovered, but he seemed to have developed a peculiar habit—he eagerly took advantage of moments when others were not paying attention to make Xiang Feiran speak, calling him Dr. Xiang and asking him botanical questions that only a graduate student would ask.

To avoid future troubles, at the end of a dinner party, Xiang Feiran suddenly and sternly said, “Sorry, there’s something I’ve been deceiving you all about for the past four years.”

“…”

At first, everyone didn’t realize what was wrong. It was only after a few seconds of stunned silence that exclamations of “f**k” and “shit” started, along with people holding their heads, covering their faces, throwing chairs, and cursing at God and His Son.

After the hotpot meal, which left them about 60% full, Fang Suining put down her chopsticks, drank some sugar-free juice, and asked, “When are we going to Boston?”

Professor Harvey’s field is climate change and biodiversity, and the origin and evolution of angiosperms, which is undoubtedly one of the most high-profile topics in botany. Although the offer stated the start time was September, Harvey had added in the email that he hoped to have the project prepared in advance during the next three months. Therefore, Xiang Feiran’s actual breathing space was nearly zero.

“Next month.”

“Have you found a place to live?”

“There are a few options.”

Fang Suining chewed on her straw and asked, “So you and your sister-in-law will be in a long-distance relationship?”

The mention of “sister-in-law” caused Shang Mingbao, who was sitting next to her, to choke.

“Don’t call her that,” Xiang Feiran reminded Fang Suining.

“Just calling her that,” Fang Suining shook her head, “I’m going to address her like that in person too.”

“Suining,” Shang Mingbao tugged at her arm, her face flushed and covered in mist from the heat, “Such formal titles shouldn’t be used casually.”

Fang Suining looked at her curiously, “Have you been infected by Xiang Feiran too? Is he rigid and so are you?”

She blinked, “Have you never called your boyfriend ‘husband’? Oh right, do you even have a boyfriend?”

Shang Mingbao shook her head and nodded.

“Brother Feiran, I’m telling you, she’s very much in love with the idea of romance,” Fang Suining suddenly recalled something, leaned forward, and teased, “She’s wanted to get married since she was nine, and her biggest dream in life is to get married, can you believe that?”

“Suining!” Shang Mingbao called out loudly, her voice fierce enough to startle Fang Suining.

Fang Suining looked at her in confusion, “What’s wrong? Why are you so upset?”

Shang Mingbao suppressed her anxiousness, never looking at Xiang Feiran but only at Fang Suining, and said firmly, word by word, “That was in the past. I didn’t understand when I was younger, but I’ve changed now. I don’t want— I don’t want to get married.”

Fang Suining, still quite blunt, replied, “Nonsense. You said the same thing at summer camp. Are you feeling embarrassed?”

She thought for a moment, “It’s okay. If my parents are so loving, if I were you, I’d also look forward to marriage. Building a home with someone you love, having children, and enriching each other’s lives over time is very brave.”

Fang Suining said this firmly, “Don’t think it’s not cool. It’s actually very cool and very lucky! Right—Brother Feiran?”

She looked at Xiang Feiran, hoping he could help comfort the girl who seemed on the verge of tears.

The dining table wasn’t wide, but the mist made it difficult for Fang Suining to see the face across from her.

After a few seconds, perhaps nearly ten seconds, she finally heard Xiang Feiran’s voice.

“Indeed, it’s very brave.” His speech was oddly slow, but there was no obvious emotion.

Fang Suining held Shang Mingbao’s hand and felt how cold it was. She wanted to tease her, leaning in with a very cute tone and saying, “You forgot, you said your perfect life plan was to get married before 25.”

“I’ve changed my mind now.” Shang Mingbao sighed, her sweet smile slightly forced, and said softly, “Not in a hurry before 25.”

Don’t take it seriously, okay? Her inner voice whispered, not knowing who she was pleading with.

“What do you mean ‘changed your mind’?” Fang Suining smiled, “It sounds like correcting a mistake.”

She put down her chopsticks, cleared her throat, and said seriously, “Shang Mingbao, you need to understand that yearning for and trusting in marriage is something only a very small part of the world experiences when their lives are perfectly blessed. It’s your great luck and uniqueness, so you must realize it!”

Shang Mingbao pressed her lips, unsure of what to say, and could only say, “Thank you, Suining.”

Fang Suining lightened the mood and raised her glass, “Here’s to Shang Mingbao’s life goals being achieved smoothly.”

Marriage before 25 with someone you love?

Xiang Feiran silently lifted the corners of his lips and raised his glass of Coke.

The clinking of glass against glass was soft and clear, with the sound of crushed ice floating.

When he put down his glass, the long fingers showed a bluish-white tint from the force, which had not faded for a long time.

With a scraping sound, the chair legs made noise against the marble floor. Xiang Feiran suddenly stood up and said softly, “I need to step outside.”

His voice and expression were calm, but his back was hurried, as if he couldn’t wait.

When he went out, he realized he hadn’t brought cigarettes. He had a strong craving and asked someone nearby for one. Among strangers in a foreign country—whether tourists, students, immigrants, or those working illegally—there was a natural bond of skin color and culture. It was easy to help if one could.

“Hey,” the person handing him a cigarette was a Northerner, eyeing him sideways, “Young guy, why are your hands shaking so much?”

Xiang Feiran took the white cigarette with disbelief—it was a lotus flower, which was rare even in China. He strangely remembered it.

In the dusk breeze of Flushing, in Hokkien Cantonese, and Mandarin, a stranger with a northern accent handed him a lotus flower.

A white crescent mark was pressed into the cigarette with his fingertips. When a stranger saw it, he laughed and asked, “Are you still smoking?”

He had been holding out the lighter for a while.

Xiang Feiran took it, his fingertips appearing pale under the streetlight.

He cupped his hands to light the cigarette, took a drag, and his chest beneath the black coat heaved deeply.

To walk into the marriage hall with the person he loves, to start a family, have children, and spend the long remainder of his life together.

Before the age of twenty-five.

Fang Suining’s words echoed clearly in his ears, then lost their sound, leaving only Fang Suining’s mouth opening and closing, just like at the dinner table—

Just at the dinner table, he had also briefly lost his hearing and voice.

Things were no different from the beginning; he had known all along she would marry someone else, and he would never enter marriage with anyone. But knowing her ideals about marriage suddenly made him profoundly fearful of the future.

As if he could see her having a good life.

This scene was different from the life movie he had imagined with Wu Baiyan in the Wu family.

Maybe back then it was holding the case at eye level, but now the scene includes her love.

Arranged marriages can also give birth to love.

Xiang Feiran hadn’t brushed off the ash for a long time, a self-deprecating smile rising on his quietly hanging face.

Don’t underestimate her determination to love anyone. She can love others and spend her life.

A cigarette’s worth of time is short. Once the wind cleared the smoke, he turned back.

When talking about his girlfriend again, Fang Suining clearly felt his interest was not as high. When asked about long-distance relationship plans, Xiang Feiran said, “Let it be.”

“Oh.” Fang Suining had been throwing jabs all night, “Aren’t you afraid of someone else taking her? Letting it be will definitely cool down.”

Xiang Feiran stopped his action, looked at her quietly for a few seconds, his gaze deep as a tranquil pool: “Say something good.”

“May you have a hundred years of good marriage?”

Too good, too good to betray her ideals, impossible.

Xiang Feiran thought for a moment: “Just wish, four years of good marriage.”

“Ah?” Fang Suining thought he was crazy.

Hadn’t seen anyone set a deadline for their own relationship before.

Shang Mingbao, leaning on the edge of the booth, looked at him with her black eyes fixed: “Why four years?”

The fire was out, the pot no longer bubbling, and the white mist had cooled, dissipating before their eyes.

Xiang Feiran met her gaze, his fingers unconsciously curling up, yet his eyes remained calm and gentle.

“Leave a year for her to find a new love.”

Shang Mingbao was caught off guard, her surprised expression frozen on her face, and as she glanced away, her lowered lashes also covered the mist on her pupils.

After dinner, Fang Suining still wanted to queue for a reputedly authentic dessert, but the line was long, and the narrow store was crowded. The ordering was done by shouting at the auntie, truly reminiscent of being in the domestic scene. But after Fang Suining made this joke, no one responded.

Seeing Shang Mingbao sitting alone on a pink plastic stool, looking isolated in contrast to the night market, Fang Suining skipped over, somewhat confused and concerned: “What’s wrong? Why are you suddenly so down?”

Shang Mingbao looked up and said abruptly: “When we toasted earlier, our glasses had Coke.”

No one understood, but Fang Suining still acknowledged her with an “uh-huh.”

Shang Mingbao raised her face even higher, bathed in the eaves light of the dessert shop, persistently and slightly smiling, asking, “So, it won’t come true, right?”

Because the toast words only work with wine.

She no longer wanted that ideal of twenty-five.

“I don’t want it so soon,” Shang Mingbao said seriously, as if talking to herself, “Leaving a little more time for the previous love is also okay.”

A sudden pang from the heart instantly numbed Xiang Feiran’s entire body.