What Became of Them (3)

It was a thought so ridiculous that it rendered all her worries and efforts in vain. Whether or not he knew about Lerian’s thoughts, Leonard came to visit her after a long time. Leonard’s face was beaming with a big smile when he came to see her.

Looking at the smile that was not much different from a few years ago, Lerian felt, for the first time, a sense of disgust towards that smile.

As the news of her pregnancy spread beyond the palace to various parts of the empire, people’s attitudes toward her changed. However, Lerian was always nervous because she vaguely knew whose child was growing inside her womb.

Why did these things keep happening to her? Why couldn’t she be happy like everyone else?

For fear that she might end up like Kilianerisa if this matter was exposed, she gradually withered away with worry. Despite consuming carefully selected nutritious foods, she became increasingly haggard day by day.

The only thing she could do was to find Alex, the cause of the incident. She desperately searched for him, but he was nowhere to be found, as if he vanished without a trace.

Then, one day, Alex came to find her.

The man who had been nowhere to be found when she was looking for him, now suddenly appeared before her. At first, Lerian was furious upon seeing him, but she realized that Alex’s face was not much different from hers. Just as Lerian was belatedly trying to contain her anger, he unexpectedly fell to his knees and spoke.

“I will take responsibility.”

Lerian narrowed her eyes at the empty words. To appear after all this time and say something like this. Lerian grabbed him by the collar and shouted.

“Responsibility? You’re going to take responsibility? What responsibility are you talking about?”

She knew that it wasn’t his fault alone, but Lerian felt she was going crazy if she didn’t blame someone. Despite being shaken by her, Alex calmly recited the plan he had thought of.

“My, my father said he had a solution. Let us escape to a neighboring county first, and then…”

“And you’re saying this now?!”

She had gone to great lengths just to maintain this position. She couldn’t even sleep peacefully, and she was constantly tormented by unexplained anxiety, as if stealing someone else’s possessions. And now, the result of all her suffering was to escape?

“I, I’m sorry. I’ve… I’ve ruined Your Highness’ life.”

He bowed his head with a face that seemed to have nothing more to say. Seeing that, Lerian became even more furious. Although she couldn’t remember much of that day, in fact, Lerian vaguely knew. She was the one who seduced him. In retrospect, he was more like a victim ensnared by her.

But why are you apologizing to me?

If he had said that he was wronged and that he didn’t care, she might have been able to treat him more harshly. But now, she didn’t know what to say. Lerian swallowed the feelings that were about to burst out and asked him.

“So, what is this plan?”

For the first time, a foolish smile appeared on his face, which had been sulky for a long time. Ironically, that smile made Lerian feel a momentary flutter in her heart. She thought that it was a little strange that she felt a different emotion than what she had always felt for Leonard, but that vague emotion quickly disappeared.

The plan that Alex told her was quite absurd, but it was surprisingly convincing. Since it was only a matter of time before they got caught, she had to follow his opinion. However, in order to follow through with that plan, she had to abandon everything she had held onto until now.

Her wounded hands, which had been holding on to things beyond her means due to her greed, finally loosened. There was pain in her grip, but it still brought relief.

***

And so, time passed, and the day finally came when the plan was to be carried out. As she was sneaking out of her room, Lerian was caught by the soldiers. She suspected that Alex had tricked her to get rid of her, but seeing Alex also captured with her, she felt a bit relieved that it wasn’t the case.

It was a ridiculous feeling to feel relieved even though they were both caught.

“Lerian, how could you…!”

The sound of two pairs of footsteps approaching from behind made her gaze slowly shift in that direction. The owner of the voice was Leonard. He was looking at her with a shocked expression as if he had been betrayed. It was the attitude she had anticipated. She thought it would hurt her heart to see, but strangely, she laughed. It was a laugh containing all the indescribable emotions within her.

“How can you be so shameless after committing infidelity?”

The sight of Viola, who was standing close to him as if it had always been her place, left Lerian momentarily speechless. It had always been her place, but now someone else was occupying it. Only after seeing that did Lerian realize it belatedly.

‘I really have nowhere to go now.’

All the hardships she had gone through were so insignificant that they could disappear so easily. Despite living in constant distress, all her struggles appeared insignificant to them, to the point that none of her efforts seemed to matter. It felt as if all the strength had drained from her body.

She laughed hollowly.

“Yes, I did it all.”

With nothing left to protect, what was there to fear? For the first time, she let go of all her worries. She felt so comfortable for the first time in her life, so much so that she regretted not letting go sooner. She spoke weakly but with dignity.

“Are you going to kill me?”

Infidelity was not heinous enough to warrant a death sentence. Although all honor would be lost, life would be spared.

Leonard was taken aback by Lerian’s attitude, who was not only not apologizing but was instead being defiant. He shook his head with a pained expression.

“Is that all you have to say to me?”

Anyway, aren’t the words one can say already predetermined in this situation? In this meaningless comedy, Lerian suddenly remembered a woman who had been in a similar situation a few years ago. Was she like this too? Was she exhausted like this?

For the first time, she understood that woman’s feelings.

Lerian responded with a strange expression. Yes.

“I understand.”

Leonard turned away. Surprisingly, seeing his retreating figure didn’t feel as regrettable as she thought it would.

“……Why did you do that?”

Alex, who had been watching her the whole time, spoke with a heavy voice. He seemed to be genuinely concerned about Lerian. Looking at him, Lerian smiled brightly.

“What, do you think they will kill us?”

As Lerian expected, they didn’t die. However, they were expelled from the capital, bearing an indelible mark of dishonor. As Lerian left the palace, she took one last look at the grand palace. The grand ambition that could never be reached had collapsed. She had lost everything she had yearned and desired for all her life—

Yet, she had no regrets.

However, her gaze continued to be drawn to that place the woman who had died in vain lingered in her mind. She seemed to be able to understand the truth of her, which she did not know or want to understand at that time, only after she became in that situation.

Amidst these thoughts, one lingering question arose.

Did she really have to die?

Her gaze, which had been lingering in the imperial palace, shifted slightly to the side.

There, Viola, the winner of this incident, and the father of the defeated woman were engaged in conversation. The two seemed quite friendly.

Belatedly thinking about it, perhaps Kilianerisa wasn’t the perpetual loser she had always believed her to be. It wasn’t herself either.

Then, all that was left was…

Her gaze turned back to the imperial palace. More specifically, to the inside.

“Let’s go.”

At Alex’s words, Lerian lightly diverted her gaze and boarded the waiting carriage. And she didn’t look back again.

──── ⑅*❀*⑅ ────

Several years passed since then.

During that time, Lerian’s life had undergone quite a few changes. She had cut her hair short, which she had intentionally grown to fit someone’s taste, and her face, which appeared somewhat intimidated, blossomed with confidence. And, most importantly—

“Madame, what are you looking at so intently?”

Lerian’s gaze, which had been fixed on the newspaper, turned to Alex. She closed the newspaper she had been reading.

“It’s nothing. I was just looking for something fun to share with our Leah.”

“So, did you find an interesting story?”

Placing the newspaper on the dining table, she casually glanced at the headline on the front page and then turned away lightly.

“Well, it’s not that interesting.”

「The Emperor of A Nation Turned Out To Be Infertile!」

“Just… it’s just a common story you can find anywhere, so don’t worry about it.”

It was a story that had no relevance to her now, something that belonged to someone else.