{Satou-san’s Waiting Time}

The line at the boarding gate began to move slowly. The people gathering in the lobby also started to move about in a hurry.

The announcement echoed loudly against the high ceiling, vibrating in my ears.

But Satou-san remained still.

She stood motionless, staring at a fixed point, waiting for that moment. She had detached herself from the noisy lobby atmosphere and stood unmoving in a corner.

She didn’t even notice that I was there. She didn’t turn to look at me, just continued to wait, persistently.

I waited too. A few meters away, I waited with an impatient feeling.

It was painful. Watching Satou-san’s earnest expression. No matter how that expression changed, I knew it would be painful for me.

Right now, there was nothing I could do but wait. So, I waited.

I was lost in thought while I waited.

I had been thinking since that night when I received the phone call and heard her confession.

Today, even while swaying on the train, I kept thinking.

A decision about feelings that had not yet found an answer.

People passed by. They brushed past me.

Through the gaps, I watched Satou-san.

Amidst the rapidly changing airport scenery, Satou-san alone remained still. Like a figure in a painting, she remained unmoving. I could see that she was slowly blinking as if to cherish the time.

Suddenly, I heard another announcement.

Satou-san moved slightly at that moment.

She lowered her gaze to the cell phone in her hand. Her expression didn’t change. After confirming something, she looked up again and began staring at a fixed point. She was still waiting.

I checked my watch. It was almost 6 PM.

Resolutely, I raised my gaze. I focused on Satou-san and started walking toward her.

The sound of my sneakers on the airport floor was harsh and cold. Yet, my feet felt soft and unsteady, sinking slightly. With my head swimming in heat, I approached her, but Satou-san still didn’t look at me. She was staring at a point not me.

But as I closed the distance, I hesitated.

After taking a deep breath, I stopped and waited a few seconds.

“Satou-san.”

I called her name softly.

The name I had repeatedly called out in my heart.

Satou-san flinched and moved her shoulders.

She turned around vigorously, her ponytail swaying. She recognized me immediately, and her eyes widened. I could see the tension in her hand gripping the cell phone.

“Yamaguchi-kun, why?”

Her voice was hoarse.

“I’m sorry.”

My apology sounded insincere. Like Satou-san, my voice was also hoarse.

“I got worried… and came. I’m sorry, I know it’s unnecessary, but I had to.”

When I said that, Satou-san’ looked like she was about to cry. Her eyebrows lowered, she bit her lip tightly, and looked down.

After a moment, trembling words came back.

“I’m sorry, Yamaguchi-kun. But it’s okay. I’m still waiting.”

“Yeah.”

I nodded.

I had thought so. Satou-san would wait. She could wait indefinitely. She was very sincere in that regard.

We both remained silent.

I deliberately avoided asking the exact time of their appointment. It was pointless to confirm. The anxiety was becoming a reality.

Satou-san waited, still looking down. She was likely more anxious than I was, shivering and seeming cold. The cell phone wrapped in her palm did not ring at all.

I watched Satou-san. Even though she wasn’t looking at me, I continued to watch.

She was within reach if I stretched out my hand. It had always been like that. Satou-san in the seat next to me was always close in the classroom every day. Yet, to Satou-san, I seemed like a distant presence. Even though I was so close, she wouldn’t look at me.

I could see her eyelashes moving through her slightly lowered bangs. Her usual ponytail, devoid of charm. A denim skirt and long-sleeve T-shirt that I had never seen before. Sneakers that remained unmoving. Her trembling thin shoulders. Her tightly clenched hand and the cell phone.

Everything seemed reachable if I just extended my hand.

“Satou-san.”

I called her name again.

Satou-san did not answer.

“How long are you planning to wait?”

I asked while looking at my watch. It was well past 6 PM.

Satou-san still did not answer. She remained silent, continuing to wait.

An announcement about the arrival of a plane was heard from above.

The many voices in the lobby mixed together, sounding like a ringing in my ears.

Satou-san did not raise her face. Perhaps because she knew this was not the plane she was waiting for. Or maybe she already knew something else.

I kept my gaze fixed on Satou-san. I didn’t understand anything. My chest ached with the growing anxiety and the premonition that even if anxiety became reality, I wouldn’t be able to make Satou-san turn around.

I knew it would be painful, I had known all along, yet I came to meet Satou-san.

And I was struggling to shake her heart. In a desperate and harsh manner.

“Satou-san.”

I called her name.

“Are you not tired?”

She shook her head silently.

Even though she should be tired, she said she was not. How could she be tired doing something for someone she loves? She was dedicated. So, she could wait as long as needed.

I was the same. If there was something I could do for Satou-san, I would try to do it. Even if it made me tired, I wouldn’t want to give up.

But I didn’t know what I could do for her. I didn’t know what would help her.

What I knew was that I wouldn’t make her wait like this. I wouldn’t make her anxious like this. I didn’t know how she felt, but I knew I would make every effort to make her happy.

This kind of love didn’t seem right for Satou-san. She seemed more suited for something brighter. Like making awkward remarks and then realizing and blushing later, or causing trouble and then laughing it off later, or being down but always bouncing back—she seemed suited for that kind of love. Not for trembling with anxiety and being troubled.

It didn’t suit her.

The lobby had become more crowded. Probably people who had disembarked from the plane.

I looked at my watch again.

6:40 PM. The sunset outside the window had disappeared without me noticing.

“Satou-san.”

I called her name once more.

“Do you still intend to wait?”

I added a slightly cruel question.

Satou-san immediately looked up. With tear-filled eyes, she stared at me fiercely.

“I will wait. I will wait. Because they will come. They promised they would come.”

I heard her hoarse voice respond, and I sighed.

“But it was like this last time too.”

Satou-san had been kept waiting before. For a long time, so long she even caught a cold. Why could she wait for someone who didn’t even bother to contact her because of an urgent matter?

Satou-san shook her head strongly.

“But today is different from last time. They will come. They told me they would definitely come!”

Her voice echoed amid the commotion.

Although I felt several gazes, I did not avert my eyes from Satou-san.

A face that seemed ready to burst into tears.

Eyes filled with tears.

Shaking shoulders.

What is supporting her now as she stands firm with all her might? Is it her steadfast feelings, her innocent trust, or her stubborn sincerity?

I wasn’t innocent or sincere, but I liked Satou-san. So I continued.

“Stop it. Stop waiting.”

You should stop. It’s not worth it.

“There’s no need to wait until it becomes so painful.”

“No!”

Satou-san screamed.

“I have to wait. They promised we would meet this time. We made a promise! I have to see them. I can’t believe anything without meeting them!”

She screamed with all her strength.

“Because I’m anxious. Even if they see me, even if they meet me, I’m extremely anxious whether they still love me. I want to be sure. I want to believe their words. I have to meet them!”

Hearing her desperate cry, I reached out.

I gently touched her trembling shoulder, and the next moment, I hugged her tightly with all my strength.

With my other hand, I held the knot of her ponytail. To pull her closer.

Satou-san did not resist.

She didn’t resist when I hugged her, when I pulled her in, or when I brought my lips close to her ear.

“Stop it.”

I whispered the harsh words.

“If you can’t believe it without going that far, you should stop. It doesn’t suit you, Satou-san. It’s not like you.”

Satou-san remained still, in my arms for a while.

Then, after a moment, she began to cry.