Chapter 6 – 06

Jiang Siwei couldn’t tell if Lou Jia was joking with that WeChat message, so he stared at those words for a long time, trying to decipher their meaning.

He clearly remembered that back when they were in school, as soon as she saw a dog, she would run 800 meters away in fear. How could she suddenly start raising one now?

Could time really change a person’s choices and habits?

Even things that once caused fear… or people who were once deeply loved.

Thinking of this, Jiang Siwei suddenly felt like he had been injected with adrenaline, instantly snapping out of his previous sluggish state.

Since people can change, and can start liking a little dog they once feared, does that mean they might also start liking someone they didn’t in the past?

He gripped his phone tightly, feeling inexplicably excited, and sent Lou Jia a sticker of an excited little dog.

Lou Jia didn’t reply, but Jiang Siwei didn’t feel disappointed. His high spirits lasted all the way until dinner, and instead of avoiding her, he eagerly took the empty seat across from her.

Noticing the joy he couldn’t hide, Lou Jia smiled and asked, “Did you win the lottery or something? You’re so happy.”

“Pretty much, the results are coming soon,” Jiang Siwei’s eyes sparkled, looking just like Xiao Mao, who was sitting nearby, happily chewing on a bone.

Lou Jia found it inexplicably cute. She picked up a piece of meat and tossed it to Xiao Mao, then placed a chicken leg onto Jiang Siwei’s plate.

Xiao Mao eagerly lowered his head to eat the meat, his tail wagging furiously.

Jiang Siwei also picked up the chicken leg and took a bite.

Why doesn’t he have a tail?

Lou Jia, watching Jiang Siwei, muttered to herself absentmindedly.

“What?” Jiang Siwei didn’t catch her words and looked up.

“Nothing,” Lou Jia shook her head. “Just eat.”

Jiang Siwei didn’t think much of it, unaware that in Lou Jia’s eyes, he had become almost indistinguishable from Xiao Mao.

He just felt like a gambler standing at the edge of the prize pool. Although he was still trying to figure out the rules and conditions for winning, he no longer wanted to passively wait for the dealer to announce them one by one.

They say the more you like someone, the more passive you become, but Jiang Siwei knew his chance to enter this game hadn’t come easily. He was willing to be the one to take the initiative.

Even if he lost everything, it would just bring him back to where he started—right where Jiang Siwei had been all these years.

Lou Jia wasn’t aware of what was going through Jiang Siwei’s mind, but she could clearly feel that after that day, Jiang Siwei no longer avoided her.

Whenever she wasn’t in class, all she had to do was turn around, and she would always find him behind her.

Lou Jia had never considered this before, nor did she notice anything unusual. But Jiang Siwei’s affection was completely unhidden, like a blazing flame surrounding her.

Even if she were as dense as a block of wood, she would have been able to feel the warmth of his emotions.

But she wasn’t. Lou Jia had grown up surrounded by love, which made her more attuned to recognizing it in others.

Yet this time, she couldn’t figure out when Jiang Siwei’s feelings had begun.

During this time, Lou Jia kept thinking about this question and couldn’t help but keep glancing at Jiang Siwei. Sometimes she would stare so intently that he’d come over and ask if something was wrong.

She wouldn’t say anything, just look into his eyes. Often, Jiang Siwei would blush under her gaze and shift his eyes away.

In those moments, Lou Jia found him irresistibly cute. She’d lift her hand to pinch his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin growing hotter and hotter.

Yet, despite all this, Jiang Siwei would still stay right where he was, as if no matter what Lou Jia did to him, it was perfectly fine.

Occasionally, Jiang Siwei would ask some sensitive questions. Like today, when he and Lou Jia were organizing a batch of extracurricular books donated by Zhang Lin.

He couldn’t help but ask Lou Jia why she and Zhang Lin broke up—was it because she stopped liking him?

To be fair, Zhang Lin was indeed a great person.

During the time Lou Jia was dating Zhang Lin, Jiang Siwei had clumsily tried to imitate everything about him, though it was more of a poor imitation than anything else.

Lou Jia liked Zhang Lin as a person, not the external traits that could easily be copied by others.

Once Jiang Siwei clearly understood this, he made a decisive break with everything from the past.

He could block calls and messages, and he could ignore everything about her, but he couldn’t stop himself from liking her.

Jiang Siwei didn’t want to lose this hard-won opportunity. He hoped to learn some lessons and gain experience from Zhang Lin’s failure.

“Breaking up wasn’t because I stopped liking him,” Lou Jia said. “But not getting back together is because I don’t like him anymore.”

Her answer wasn’t surprising, yet it still left Jiang Siwei with a bitter taste. He persistently asked, “If you still liked him, why did you break up?”

“Everything he gave me was what he left after weighing the pros and cons,” Lou Jia placed a stack of books onto the shelf. “I don’t need that kind of love.”

Jiang Siwei, crouching on the ground, looked down as he organized the books in the box. “If someone could give you love without any weighing or calculating—if it was all of their love—would you be willing to consider them?”

Without hesitation, Lou Jia replied, “Of course I would.”

“What if that person is…” Jiang Siwei lifted his head, his eyelashes trembling slightly, and his heart pounding unnaturally fast. “Someone you never expected. Would you still be willing?”

Lou Jia looked down at him, seriously considering for a moment before nodding. “Yes, I would.”

Jiang Siwei seemed to let out a sigh of relief, feeling both excited and nervous. He jumped up from the ground but, having crouched for too long, his legs were numb, and he stumbled, falling right into the box of books.

Lou Jia was startled, but when she saw his embarrassed state, she couldn’t help but laugh. She crouched down beside him, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Luckily, Jiang Siwei had already taken most of the books out of the box, so he didn’t hurt himself. He just felt a bit embarrassed.

Lou Jia stood up and extended her hand to him. “Come on, get up. If we don’t finish organizing this today, we can forget about having dinner tonight.”

Jiang Siwei didn’t hesitate and took her hand. The warmth of their palms overlapping made his heart race even faster. He felt as if his whole body was going weak, unintentionally placing all his weight on their clasped hands.

The next second—

Lou Jia, pulled by his strength, fell right on top of him.

Jiang Siwei snapped back to reality, hurriedly trying to catch her, but the already fragile box couldn’t handle the weight of both of them and collapsed completely.

His head hit the ground with a thud, and the corner of the box jabbed painfully into his back. Meanwhile, Lou Jia landed securely in his arms.

After the brief moment of chaos, everything seemed to fall silent.

The world felt oddly still.

Jiang Siwei hit his head hard enough to feel a bit dizzy, his heart bouncing wildly in his chest without any sense of rhythm.

Lou Jia didn’t need to strain to hear it; the steady “thump, thump” echoed loudly, each beat shouting his unspoken feelings.

Without a word, she sat up and leaned her back against the bookshelf.

Jiang Siwei sat up as well, facing Lou Jia. The fading light of the evening filtered through the window, casting a warm glow as dust floated in the air between them.

For some reason, his eyes felt slightly warm. “You’ve figured it out, haven’t you?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah,” Lou Jia didn’t lie. “You’re so obvious. I’m not an idiot.”

Jiang Siwei wanted to laugh, but instead, tears fell first. “I tried to hide it, but I just couldn’t. I really couldn’t.”

“I never said you had to hide it,” Lou Jia said with a smile.

“And you…” Jiang Siwei felt like crying while saying all this was pretty lame. He raised his hand and wiped his face haphazardly. “What do you think about it?”

“A little surprised,” Lou Jia replied.

“That’s it?” Jiang Siwei’s eyes were red. “You didn’t think I’m… some kind of freak?”

Lou Jia hadn’t expected this to be what was going on in his mind. She frowned and said, “Why would I think you’re a freak just because you like me? Do I seem like someone with a problem in my head?”

“No, that’s not what I meant,” Jiang Siwei hurriedly explained, flustered. None of this had gone according to any plan he might have had, and now he wasn’t sure what to say. After a few seconds of silence, he admitted, “I just thought… you’ve always seen me as a little brother, and for me to have these kinds of feelings for you, it feels wrong somehow.”

“I did think of you as a little brother,” Lou Jia said with a laugh, “but you’re not really my brother.”

Jiang Siwei felt a lump in his throat and was on the verge of tears again, but he didn’t want Lou Jia to see, so he kept his head down and asked, “So, what now?”

This time, Lou Jia genuinely laughed. “Jiang Siwei, who’s supposed to like who here?”

“…I like you,” he mumbled.

“Then I’ll think about it,” she replied playfully.

Jiang Siwei jerked his head up. “Think about… what?”

“Think about whether or not to accept your feelings,” Lou Jia leaned in closer, closing the distance between them. “Siwei, I don’t think your feelings are wrong. I like you too. It’s just that the way I like you might be a little different from what you’re hoping for right now.”

“You’ve got to give me some time, so that my feelings can grow and change.” She reached up and gently wiped away the tear from the corner of his eye. “Okay?”

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Author’s Note:

A little dog that knows how to cry will always have a sister to dote on =3=

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