Chapter 5: Fawning

When Qin Meinang was awakened, it was just before dawn, and the room was still lit. Wang Mama, Cui Xi, and Cui Si were already gathered by her bedside, waiting for her to get up. She reached out, but the little one she had slept with last night was no longer there. Startled, she asked, “Where is my son?”

Wang Mama replied, “The wet nurse took Heng Ge’er away. The old madam is up now!”

Qin Meinang breathed a sigh of relief, squirmed under the covers, stretched lazily, and groaned, “Oh, dear! It’s still early, let me sleep a bit more…”

Becoming the first wife in ancient times wasn’t easy, especially without work obligations. Surely, a little extra sleep wouldn’t hurt?

“No, Madam!” Wang Mama said as she pulled back the mosquito net. “Lord Hou asked that you wake early to greet the old madam. You can’t miss it. Cui Si just went to check, and the lights are already on in Lord Hou’s quarters. He seems to be preparing to go to the upper room. You should hurry and join him!”

The fact that Lord Hou came to her room last night, giving such meticulous instructions, showed how much he cared about what others thought of his wife’s resurrection. Lord Hou valued his reputation greatly, and though he maintained a distant relationship with his wife, he still adhered to the formality of being a proper husband, visiting her daily to create the appearance of a harmonious marriage. As a cold blooded general who had seen countless deaths, he shed no tears when she “died” no one would question him for this. But now that she had recovered, forgetting everything that happened before, and showed no fear of Lord Hou, he was at a loss. Wang Mama was no fool, she could tell there was a turning point here.

Since Qin Meinang had no recollection of the past, it was as if there was no past!

Wang Mama was resolute, she would guide Qin Meinang to be obedient, respectful, and compliant with Lord Hou. If she did so, Lord Hou would have no reason to neglect her, and her life in the Hou mansion wouldn’t be as difficult as before.

Qin Meinang opened her eyes, “Has Lord Hou gotten up?”

“He should have. Lord Hou has been in the army for many years, and he’s always decisive and efficient. He doesn’t have the patience to wait for others. Madam, please get up quickly!” Wang Mama urged.

Qin Meinang took a deep breath. Heng Ge’er’s father the quiet, handsome, and indifferent man seemed to always bring a sense of pressure, as though she owed him something, making her hesitant to approach him. Were they not a couple? They had been married for only a little over a year, and she had already given him a healthy baby boy. He should have been happy and affectionate, so why did he always act so distant?

Sighing inwardly, she thought, “Well, I knew ancient society valued men over women, with all these paternal and marital rules that harm women. I mustn’t offend him. The world here is unfamiliar, so I need to rely on him for support. Lord Hou holds a high rank, and his title of Wei Yuan, Hou is prestigious. With him, I will have a noble position and won’t have to worry about food or clothing. For Heng Ge’er’s sake, and for my own, I must obey him for now. We’ll deal with the rest later.”

After counting to three in her head, she got out of bed, not used to spitting into a basin in front of the servants. She put on her outer robe and headed to the inner room to wash up.

Wang Mama urged her, and Cui Xi hurried to style her hair. As Cui Xi trembled while trying to fashion a complicated hairstyle, Qin Meinang glanced at Wang Mama and, with a soft voice, said, “Lord Hou might be getting impatient. Madam, you used to wear this hairstyle often!”

Qin Meinang shook her head, “Isn’t it dull to wear the same style every day? Let’s change it!”

Cui Jian quickly finished tidying the bed and rushed over. “I’ll do a different style for you!” she said, and soon Qin Meinang’s hair was arranged in a beautiful, lively flying immortal hairstyle. Qin Meinang was satisfied with the look. She chose some exquisite jewelry and put on a bright red, gold-threaded satin coat with a coral-colored skirt. She wore jade bangles and a bejeweled necklace, looking radiant with wealth.

Wang Mama carefully timed everything. Just as they were about to leave, Xu Junying happened to pass by and stopped, waiting for Qin Meinang to greet him. After a brief exchange, he led the way outside, while Wang Mama and the servants discreetly watched him, relieved that everything was going according to plan.

As they exited the courtyard, Qin Meinang refused Cui Xi’s assistance and quickly caught up with Xu Junying, though he walked faster. His heavy boots crunched through the snow, while her delicate lambskin shoes made no sound as she playfully walked along the untouched snow. She had never experienced snow like this in her previous life, and she couldn’t resist the fun.

Halfway there, she suddenly remembered her son. “Oh no, we forgot Heng Ge’er!” she exclaimed.

Xu Junying frowned. “How could Heng Ge’er be awake this early? The wet nurse will bring him later. We need to go to the old madam’s room first, wait for her to wake up, and join her for breakfast.”

“The old madam hasn’t woken up yet?”

“Not yet.”

“Then, why go so early? Won’t we just be waiting?”

Xu Junying glanced at her. “It’s the proper thing to do. As the eldest grandson’s wife, you should be helping the old madam with her morning routine. You’ve done this before, haven’t you?”

Qin Meinang lowered her gaze, wishing she could remember at least one detail of her past.

“Do you really not remember anything?” Xu Junying asked with a slight smirk, one that was both mocking and strangely enticing.

Qin Meinang blinked, her long lashes brushing her cheek. “I died and came back to life, so I can’t remember the past. Wang Mama said I was ill for a month and caused Lord Hou a lot of worry. I’m so sorry. Illnesses make it hard to control oneself. If I behaved rudely, please be understanding.”

Xu Junying turned his face slightly, casting a cold glance at Wang Mama and Cui Xi who were following behind them. He snorted softly. Qin Meinang’s maid servants were all clever, putting on a façade in front of him but likely plotting something behind his back. If she truly didn’t remember anything, would they start behaving better?

Marrying Qin Meinang had been an act of youthful impulsiveness. She was so beautiful, who wouldn’t admire her? He thought it would be a blessing, but it had turned into a lifelong shame.

But he could never let anyone know about this ugly truth. The title his father earned, the honor he fought for, and the Xu family’s reputation none of that could be tarnished because of this.

The best outcome would have been for her to die, neatly and cleanly. Instead, she returned to life, forgetting everything, standing before him like a blank slate.

Xu Junying’s gaze on Qin Meinang was cold and indifferent. Everything could be forgotten, but the truth remained. Time couldn’t be reversed, and he was no longer the man he used to be. Qin Meinang would no longer occupy any space in his heart.