Chapter 59: Wishing You Happiness

On the second day in Z Country, Lu Zhengfei arranged a comprehensive psychological evaluation for Chen Qianqing.

Faced with the psychologist and various specialized tests, Chen Qianqing was notably cooperative.

As an accompanying family member, Lu Zhengfei was also asked questions regarding Chen Qianqing.

Based on Xu Shaoren’s observations and Lu Zhengfei’s descriptions, Xu hypothesized that Chen Qianqing might not be the primary personality of this body. However, split personalities are typically accompanied by memory loss and other aftereffects. According to Lu Zhengfei, Chen Qianqing exhibited no such symptoms.

When the diagnosis results came in, Xu’s hypothesis proved incorrect. Chen Qianqing did not have dissociative identity disorder; instead, he was diagnosed with depressive disorder—commonly known as depression.

Depression has become a relatively common condition in public awareness. Its causes remain unclear, but severe cases can lead to hallucinations and delusions, similar to the symptoms Chen Qianqing displayed.

Chen Qianqing accepted the diagnosis calmly.

He had long realized his mental state was abnormal but had suppressed it until the deaths of Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang triggered a full-blown breakdown, leaving him unable to control his behavior or thoughts.

The doctor prescribed commonly used medications and offered recommendations for Chen Qianqing’s treatment.

For those unfamiliar with the illness, depression might seem like a trendy affliction. To outsiders, life may not appear tragic enough to warrant such despair—surely, being a little more positive would solve everything.

But the reality is far from this. Only those who suffer from depression can truly grasp the depth of its despair. It’s as if all your joy, all sources of happiness, have vanished. Positive emotions are consumed by a black hole that keeps draining them away, leaving you empty.

The small silver lining in this case was that the diagnosis showed Chen Qianqing had no tendencies toward self-harm. Neither the tests nor Lu Zhengfei’s accounts indicated such behavior.

The diagnosis concluded that Chen Qianqing had moderate depression, accompanied by hallucinations, auditory delusions, and insomnia. The doctor recommended both medication and therapy.

However, psychiatric medications often come with side effects, including dependency. After understanding these side effects, Chen Qianqing made a request to Lu Zhengfei—he would forego the medication and opt solely for therapy.

Lu Zhengfei wanted to persuade Chen Qianqing otherwise but fell silent upon seeing his resolute expression.

In some aspects, the two shared an almost unnerving level of understanding. Lu Zhengfei found that sometimes just a glance from Chen Qianqing was enough to reveal his thoughts.

Although he wanted to insist, Lu Zhengfei eventually gave in. It was Chen Qianqing himself who patted him on the shoulder and reassured him: “Don’t worry, I know my own body.”

Lu Zhengfei ultimately agreed, largely because Chen Qianqing showed no inclination toward self-harm. He also understood the strain certain medications could place on the body. After careful consideration, he accepted Chen Qianqing’s proposal.

The streets of Z Country were clean. Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei walked one behind the other toward home.

After finalizing the therapy schedule, Lu Zhengfei took Chen Qianqing to a restaurant for a meal. They later dismissed the driver and decided to walk home together.

The villa in Z Country had been a gift from Lu Zhengfei’s mother for his twelfth birthday. In his previous life, the real Chen Qianqing had also lived here.

However, the villa was later consumed in a fire. The real Chen Qianqing lost his mesmerizingly beautiful eyes in that tragedy.

The surrounding scenery felt familiar. Early spring had arrived, and trees were budding. As Chen Qianqing walked ahead, he suddenly turned and extended his hand toward Lu Zhengfei, who was trailing behind.

Lu Zhengfei froze momentarily before taking his hand. It was the hand of a pianist—slender fingers, soft and delicate to the touch, belonging to someone who had never done hard labor. The only flaw was its coldness.

Chen Qianqing turned back and continued walking, his hand still held by Lu Zhengfei, as if transported back to a specific moment in time. And the person behind him wasn’t Lu Zhengfei at all.

Holding Chen Qianqing’s hand, Lu Zhengfei felt a mix of exhilaration and fear. He grasped it tightly, as if holding onto the string of a kite. Too much force, and the kite might crash to the ground. Too little, and it might soar away, never to be seen again.

Chen Qianqing spoke: “Lu Zhengfei, what you like is Chen Qianqing, isn’t it?”

Lu Zhengfei replied, “Even if you weren’t called Chen Qianqing, I would still like you.” His voice was youthful, joyful, and filled with unyielding hope.

Chen Qianqing smiled faintly. “So, do you like the me of now, or the me of before?”

Lu Zhengfei answered, “I like both.”

“What a clever answer,” Chen Qianqing turned to look at Lu Zhengfei. “Why did you break my legs before, but treat me so well now?”

Lu Zhengfei replied, “Because I was afraid you’d leave me.” And now—I know you won’t leave me.

The smile on Chen Qianqing’s face faded slightly. “Is that so?” he said.

Lu Zhengfei gave a faint, helpless smile.

Chen Qianqing thought to himself, if he hadn’t fallen in love with that Chen Qianqing back then, would things have turned out better for both of them?

The villa’s courtyard was filled with cherry blossoms.

Pink flowers bloomed on the branches, and with every breeze, petals fluttered to the ground. The uniquely styled villa looked like a castle from a dream.

After the fire, Chen Qianqing had never stayed there again. Though he occasionally visited Z City and even stood in front of the newly renovated and even more luxurious villa, he never stepped inside. The house had forever taken his lover’s eyes and left him with memories of nightmares.

Lu Zhengfei opened the door.

Chen Qianqing remained outside, gazing at the cherry blossoms. In the yard stood a swing that had been set up long ago but was never used. After standing there for a while, he sat on it.

Before long, Lu Zhengfei came out of the house holding two freshly baked molten lava cakes. He handed one to Chen Qianqing and said, “The chef just made these—try them.”

Back then, Chen Qianqing didn’t like sweets, so Lu Zhengfei had stopped eating them as well. But now, the two people sitting together both enjoyed desserts.

Chen Qianqing scooped up a spoonful and put it in his mouth.

Since it was freshly baked, chocolate sauce oozed out the moment the spoon broke into the cake. It was still slightly warm, almost hot, as he swallowed the first bite.

Lu Zhengfei was happily eating, sitting next to Chen Qianqing, head down, taking bite after bite like a child who hadn’t had candy in years. Chocolate smudged the corners of his mouth.

Chen Qianqing stared at Lu Zhengfei for a moment, lost in thought.

Lu Zhengfei said, “Qianqing, I might have to go report to my mom tomorrow, but I’ll be back the day after to take you to the hospital.”

Chen Qianqing knew exactly why Lu Zhengfei was going. He also knew that Huang Yuping was now aware of everything about him.

This time, Lu Zhengfei could no longer come up with any excuses to deflect.

If it were just a fleeting affair, why would he go to such lengths to bring someone abroad for treatment? Chen Qianqing looked at Lu Zhengfei with a hint of pity—because Lu Zhengfei probably wouldn’t be coming back.

This might be the last time they saw each other in years.

The chocolate was slightly bitter. After finishing the cake, Chen Qianqing picked up a napkin and wiped his mouth.

Lu Zhengfei asked, “Want another one?”

Chen Qianqing shook his head.

“Then I’ll have another,” Lu Zhengfei said.

Chen Qianqing laughed. “Go ahead,” he said. ‘After all, we’ll be parting ways soon.‘

Lu Zhengfei grabbed another cake and started eating. This one had white powdered sugar sprinkled on top, which probably made it sweeter.

Chen Qianqing leaned back on the swing, slowly pushing off the ground with his feet. A cherry blossom petal landed on Lu Zhengfei’s hair. Chen Qianqing reached out, picked it off, and gently blew it away.

“Qianqing, you’re in a good mood?” Lu Zhengfei asked.

Chen Qianqing squinted, smiling. “Yeah.”

“Do you like the cake? I’ll ask the chef to make more tomorrow,” Lu Zhengfei continued.

Chen Qianqing didn’t respond and kept smiling. Should he tell Lu Zhengfei that the reason he was in a good mood was because he knew they’d soon be parting ways?

Lu Zhengfei rambled on. “Qianqing, do you want to go to school here?”

“I don’t want to go,” Chen Qianqing replied.

“That’s fine too. The doctor said you need to interact more with people. I’ll help you find a few good clubs…”

Chen Qianqing interrupted, “I don’t even speak Z Country’s language. How am I supposed to communicate with people?”

Lu Zhengfei froze, clearly caught off guard by that realization.

Chen Qianqing asked, “When you brought me here, did you never think about this?”

Lu Zhengfei stammered, “Th-then I’ll find you a Z Country language teacher first. You can learn it gradually—you’ll pick it up eventually.”

Chen Qianqing replied, “No need.” He already knew the language of Z Country, but he had no intention of letting Lu Zhengfei know.

Lu Zhengfei wanted to say more. “Qianqing—”

But Chen Qianqing stood up abruptly, ignoring Lu Zhengfei, and walked into the house. As he reached the second floor and was about to enter the bedroom, his phone rang.

The name “Han Huaiyun” appeared on the screen.

Chen Qianqing stared at the phone for a moment before answering. “Hello. What is it?”

Han Huaiyun’s soft voice came through. “Is this Mr. Chen? I’m Han Huaiyun. May I speak with you tomorrow?”

Chen Qianqing readily agreed.

Han Huaiyun added, “Please don’t tell Mr. Lu for now.”

Chen Qianqing glanced out the window at Lu Zhengfei, who was sitting on the swing in the courtyard, lost in thought. “No problem,” he replied.