Chapter 44

Talking About the Past

It wasn’t the secretary’s wife, but the secretary’s eldest son.

He couldn’t accept that his father, whom he had admired since childhood, was a beast worse than a pig or a dog.

With one knife, he ended his life.

Old Lady Xu was deeply saddened when she heard the news. “What a good person he was. How could he not see things clearly?”

Xu Jianguo didn’t go to work that day. “Mother, I’ll go take a look.”

Old Lady Xu sighed. “Go ahead, take a few people with you to help take care of the aftermath.”

With such a big incident, Hehua’s family probably had no heart to handle the arrangements.

When Xu Jianguo arrived at the secretary’s house, the eldest son’s wife and the secretary’s wife had both fainted, and the children were crying uncontrollably, making the house a complete mess.

Xu Jianguo instructed someone to clean the house and asked Hehua to find a broken mat.

Hehua searched for a long time before finally finding an old mat in the storeroom.

Xu Jianguo spread the mat on the ground, and with help, they placed the body on top, covering it with cloth.

Hehua knew that handling the funeral would cost money. She went into the house and searched for a long time before finding twenty yuan to give Xu Jianguo. “Uncle, that person didn’t give my mother any money. This is all she has. You take it for now, and if it’s not enough, I’ll find a way.”

Although Xu Jianguo had a job, he had only been working for a short time and didn’t have much money, so he accepted it calmly. “Alright, I’ll try to keep it under twenty yuan.”

Hehua was deeply grateful. “Thank you, Uncle.”

Xu Jianguo waved his hand. “We’re all from the same village, no need to thank me.”

…

The secretary’s case was resolved on the third day.

He was sent to a farm in the northeast as punishment.

The villagers cheered. “Serves him right, evil gets its due!”

“Why didn’t they just shoot him? People like him shouldn’t live in this world!”

“Sigh, what a sin. He couldn’t control himself, and now his whole family has suffered!”

…

The secretary left on the fourth day. When he came back to collect his things, he saw the body lying on the floor. His eyes didn’t show any emotion.

His wife rushed at him, crying and scratching. “Go away, get out of here, don’t ever show your face again, you beast…”

The secretary didn’t come back alone. There were staff members with him, and one of them stopped the woman from scratching. “Comrade, please calm down!”

The woman cried out in agony, “How can I calm down? He ruined this family. How can I calm down?”

Hehua went over and supported the woman, who seemed about to collapse. “Mother, don’t cry. Tears are the least valuable thing. The more we cry, the more we need to live with dignity and make him regret it.”

In the past few days, Xu Jiajia visited Hehua whenever she had time.

Xu Jiajia talked to her a lot and introduced many modern ideas to her.

Hehua was somewhat influenced by this.

The woman grabbed Hehua’s hand. “Daughter, I’m sorry. If I had discovered your troubles earlier, you wouldn’t have been ruined by him like this.

That beast…

Why didn’t lightning strike him!”

Hehua’s eyes reddened, her tears welling up but not falling. “Mother, let it be. Time will prove everything.”

Seeing Hehua’s strong appearance, the woman felt even more heartbroken, wishing she could rush over and fight that beast.

The secretary left that day, and the eldest son was buried.

The house seemed to return to its usual quiet, but it was still different.

The villagers occasionally discussed the former secretary’s family, but once the village head heard, they were fined.

He never did it lightly, directly imposing work-point penalties.

In these times, work points meant food, money, and were everyone’s lifeline.

After two people were fined, everyone realized the seriousness of the matter and stopped gossiping about the former secretary’s family.

With no more gossip, Hehua’s family found things a little easier.

After the incident, Wang Xiulan’s personality became even more introverted. She kept her mouth shut and wouldn’t speak.

Her husband didn’t know how to face her, and they slept in separate beds.

One stormy, rainy night,

Wang Xiulan hanged herself.

On the day of her suicide, her family came over, and there was a dispute.

Everyone thought that something her family said must have pushed her to take her own life.

Her husband held her lifeless body, crying in deep sorrow. “I was wrong. I shouldn’t have neglected you. It’s my fault, my fault…”

When the villagers heard his cries, they felt heartbroken.

Ah, what a good family, and it ended like this!

The day Wang Xiulan was buried, her husband drank a bottle of pesticide and ended his life, leaving behind three young children.

In just a few days, three people from the family had died.

Hehua’s mother was devastated and wished she could follow them, but with young children at home and her own unfinished tasks, she could only cling to life.

…

At the Xu family home,

Xu Jianguo sat on a bench, sighing deeply. “Do you think Huizai is foolish? Why give up on life when being alive is so good?

Now that he’s gone, who will take care of those three kids?”

Old Lady Xu was also uneasy. The old beast made the mistake, yet three young people had to pay the price!

The person who should have died was him!

Xu Jiajia, sitting nearby, was eating sunflower seeds. “If you can’t get over it, keeping it bottled up inside will eventually lead to depression. Even if you don’t die, you’ll suffer.”

This was the first time Xu Jianguo and Old Lady Xu had heard the term “depression.” They both looked at Xu Jiajia, asking in unison, “Granddaughter, what is depression?”

“Daughter, is depression something to be afraid of?”

Xu Jiajia took a moment to organize her thoughts before answering slowly. “Depression is when someone constantly feels down, and they lose interest in everything.”

In simpler terms, depression is like getting stuck in a dead end, unable to find a way out, and sometimes it even leads to self-doubt.

In severe cases, it can lead to suicide.”

Old Lady Xu gasped in shock. “My goodness, there’s such a thing as this illness? It’s terrifying!”

Xu Jiajia knew that Hehua’s family situation had also affected Xu Jianguo, so she patted his shoulder and said, “Dad, bad emotions must be pushed far away. Only then can our health improve, and life will be full of sunshine.”

Xu Jianguo was scared by the term “depression” that Xu Jiajia mentioned. He didn’t dare to think too much anymore. “I’ll think more positively from now on.”

Xu Jiajia snapped her fingers. “That’s the way.”

After chatting for a while, Hehua arrived. She looked thin but still in good spirits. “Jiajia, do you still have your high school textbooks?”

Xu Jiajia nodded. “Yes, wait a moment, I’ll go find them.”

Hehua looked at her with gratitude. “Thank you…”

Xu Jiajia waved her hand. “It’s no trouble at all. Don’t mention it. If you don’t understand something, feel free to ask me.”

Hehua’s eyes reddened, and she choked up as she replied, “Mm…”

Old Lady Xu, seeing this, felt heartbroken. She went into the house and cut half an apple for Hehua.

Hehua hesitated to take it because it was expensive. “No need, no need.”

Old Lady Xu firmly put the apple into her hand. “Eat.”

Hehua, intimidated by Old Lady Xu’s forceful manner, instinctively took a bite. It was crisp and sweet, and the bitterness in her heart seemed to disappear, leaving only sweetness.

Old Lady Xu noted her emotional change and felt deeply moved. “Hehua, let me tell you something. Remember what should be remembered, forget what should be forgotten, change what can be changed, and accept what cannot be changed.

We must look ahead in life. Only with optimism will there be hope.”

At this point, Old Lady Xu recalled a long-buried past: “In 1945, when the Japanese soldiers invaded the village, they killed many villagers. Your Uncle Xu’s brother and sister were among them.

When I came back from outside and heard the news, I fainted on the spot.

I fell into despair for a whole night. I knew the damage was done, and no matter how much I suffered, it wouldn’t change anything.

Later, I went to learn skills, learned to fight, and swore to never stop fighting the Japanese.”

Old Lady Xu didn’t continue her glorious history from those years. She paused for a moment, then looked at Hehua and patted her on the shoulder. “Some things we can’t change, but we can change ourselves.

We need to make ourselves stronger, and even a wall of iron and copper can’t shake a heart that’s become tough.”

Hehua listened attentively, then hoarsely replied, “I will.”

…

Time passed quickly.

Today was payday.

Xu Jianguo took his paycheck to the finance department.

His first month wasn’t even a full month, so he only earned thirty yuan.

Xu Jianguo’s hand trembled as he took the money. My goodness, it was the first time in his life to hold so much money.

If he lost it, Old Lady Xu would probably beat him to death!

Xu Jianguo hurried to the bathroom, carefully putting the money into his underwear pocket and buttoning it securely. Only when he confirmed it was safe did he leave the bathroom.

The first thing he did when he got home was divide up the thirty yuan that wasn’t even warm yet.

Xu Jiajia got twenty.

Old Lady Xu got five.

And Xu Jianguo kept five for himself.

Xu Jiajia was stunned. “Dad, why are you giving me money?”

Xu Jianguo smiled. “You got me a job, so I should give you some money, right?

I got forty this month. You get twenty-five, Grandma gets ten, and I get five. From now on, we’ll follow this standard.”

Xu Jiajia twitched her mouth. The math was very clear: “Your money will still be mine in the future, but giving it to me early is fine.”

Old Lady Xu looked at her living allowance with satisfaction. Ten yuan a month, one hundred and twenty a year.

Very good.

If she saved for a few more years, she would definitely be the wealthiest old lady in the village.

The sugar factory and the machinery factory paid salaries on the same day.

Xu Jiajia had just received her twenty yuan when Xu Xiaoyao came over with money. Besides the money, she also brought some rations.

She had eaten at the canteen.

She didn’t need oil, so she brought it all to Xu Jiajia.

“Jiajia, these are cloth tickets, oil, meat tickets, and coal tickets. For grain, I’ll bring it next time; I couldn’t bring everything this time.”

“You can trade the coal tickets with your coworkers for whatever you need. You don’t need to give them back to me, keep them for yourself.”

In the countryside, people burned firewood, so they didn’t need coal.

Xu Xiaoyao nodded. “Alright.”

Xu Jiajia looked at the money again, another twenty yuan. She looked at Xu Xiaoyao in confusion. “We agreed on fifty-fifty, but why are you giving me five extra?”

Working in the factory, she didn’t have to work in the sun. Xu Xiaoyao had become a lot fairer. When she smiled, it was like a flower blooming in the sunlight: “Fifty-fifty? You were too generous.”

Xu Jiajia hesitated to refuse, but Xu Xiaoyao wouldn’t let her: “No, I’m very satisfied with ten yuan a month.

Jiajia, you know, I’ve never been this happy before.”

Xu Xiaoyao sat with Xu Jiajia for a while. Just as she was about to leave, Wang Danü arrived and pulled her aside. “You little brat, you didn’t even go home when you came back to the village. I heard you got paid today. Where’s the money?”

Xu Xiaoyao was prepared. She took out a few bills from her pocket and handed them over.

Wang Danü was satisfied, but after counting, her face suddenly twisted. “You little brat, are you messing with me? Believe me, I’ll hit you!”

Old Lady Xu appeared silently behind her. “Who are you going to hit?”

Wang Danü jumped in shock. She turned around, looking pitifully at Old Lady Xu. “Aunt, she promised to give me five yuan before, but now she only gave me this little. You must be angry too, right?”