Chapter 48
Gu Chi x Li Zhi
Extra 4

After driving Gu Chi away, Li Zhi was full of thoughts and couldn’t sleep the entire night.

Gu Chi also couldn’t sleep. His mind was filled with the image of Li Zhi’s tearful face and her red, swollen lips moving as she spoke, making him want to kiss her again. If Li Zhi hadn’t driven him away, he wouldn’t have wanted to leave this time. By now, even if he was slow to realize it, he understood his feelings for Li Zhi.

Li Zhi, realizing her inappropriate thoughts about Gu Chi, felt despair at how unreasonable her heart was, falling for him at the wrong time.

But Gu Chi suddenly understood that he liked Li Zhi and wanted to marry her. He wanted them to see each other every day, openly be good to her, enter her room without climbing through the window, bring her back to the Grand Princess’s residence, and make her his wife and family. He also wanted to keep kissing her, to see if kissing her continuously would make her cry again. She probably would, he thought, remembering how her eyes were red and wet when he was pushed away, looking so pitiful.

Both of them had a sleepless night. Li Zhi was listless, while Gu Chi was full of energy, trying to understand the matters of marriage he had never cared about before. He knew he had to get past his mother and brother, but the most important thing was to get Li Zhi to agree.

When he went to Mingyue Nunnery again, ready to ask Li Zhi if she would marry him, she wasn’t in the room. The scriptures on the table were half-copied, and the ink on the inkstone hadn’t dried, but she was nowhere to be seen.

Gu Chi found it strange and heard a kitten meowing. Following the sound, he went around the house and finally saw Li Zhi holding a kitten in a tree on the other side.

Li Zhi had thought that if Gu Chi came again, she would close the window tightly, making it clear that their interactions were over. But who knew Gu Chi would come at such a time, even if it was just a moment earlier.

Just a moment ago, she had heard the kitten meowing and went outside, finding a kitten clinging to the tree trunk, about to fall. She had told the kitten many times to let go and that she would catch it, but the kitten couldn’t understand human words.

Li Zhi had no choice but to climb up and rescue the kitten herself. She had been quite active as a child; otherwise, she wouldn’t have known the small garden at home so well. Lifting her skirt, she easily got around the rockery and intercepted Li Mu. She could climb trees too, but after rescuing the kitten, she had no free hands and was stuck in the tree.

Feeling embarrassed about her situation, Li Zhi heard Gu Chi say from below, “I’ll catch you.”

Li Zhi remembered she had said the same thing to the kitten a moment ago. The kitten couldn’t understand human words, but she could. Yet, she hesitated about whether to jump down.

In the end, the kitten couldn’t stay still and started to squirm out of her arms. Afraid the kitten might fall from such a height, Li Zhi resolutely jumped down from the tree.

Gu Chi caught her, startling the kitten, which jumped out of Li Zhi’s arms and ran away.

Li Zhi remained in Gu Chi’s arms, and he didn’t let her go. Instead, he lowered his head, and their breaths mingled. They looked at each other under the shade of the tree, getting closer and closer…

The scene from that day replayed, but this time, they were even closer, their bodies pressed together, kissing deeper and longer than before.

Li Zhi finally regained her senses and asked Gu Chi to let her go.

Ignoring how weak her legs felt and how heavily she was breathing, Li Zhi hurried back inside, even breaking into a run, and closed the door tightly behind her. She then went to close the window.

Gu Chi walked to the window and saw Li Zhi closing it.

Once the window was closed, Li Zhi finally had time to catch her breath.

Before she could calm down, she heard Gu Chi outside the window say, “Li Zhi, I want to marry you.”

Li Zhi choked, hiding behind the window and coughing for a long time, unable to stop even after drinking water.

Gu Chi, worried, placed his hand on the window.

Li Zhi, still coughing, said, “Don’t… cough… don’t come in!”

Reluctantly, Gu Chi stopped.

After a long while, Li Zhi stopped coughing, and the room fell into a long silence.

Gu Chi stood by the window, waiting until he heard Li Zhi say, “I can’t marry you.” Her voice was very low, and it was unclear if she was speaking to Gu Chi or to herself.

After a moment, as if convincing herself, she raised her voice slightly and said to Gu Chi outside the window, “I won’t marry you.”

Not to mention how hard her life was after her last marriage, but having been married once and then entering a nunnery, remarrying… whether it’s her family or her in-laws, they would all be subject to gossip. Why make everyone unhappy because of her?

Li Zhi said “can’t” and “won’t.” but didn’t say she didn’t want to.

Gu Chi: “Then I’ll come back and ask you again.”

Li Zhi, feeling exhausted, sternly said, “Don’t come back!”

Gu Chi didn’t listen to her. Whenever he had free time, he would come, asking if she was willing to marry him.

Li Zhi always refused him.

Days passed like this, and as the Mid-Autumn Festival approached, the imperial carriage returned to the capital. Gu Chi thought he would have more free time in the future to visit Mingyue Nunnery often, but his brother informed him that after the Mid-Autumn Festival, he needed to take people to Anzhou.

Gu Chi: “…Understood.”

On the day of the Mid-Autumn Festival, beautiful lanterns were hung everywhere. On his way home, Gu Chi saw ball lanterns on a peddler’s cart and wanted to buy one for Li Zhi. Fearing Lin Qiwu would also want one if she saw it, he bought several more according to the number of people at the family banquet that evening. When he got home, he asked the kitchen to prepare an extra portion of mooncakes for him. If Li Zhi hadn’t lived in the nunnery and couldn’t eat meat, he would have brought crabs and mandarin fish as well.

At night, during the banquet, the waterside pavilion was decorated with many blooming chrysanthemums, which Gu Chi had arranged. The best two pots had already been taken to Mingyue Nunnery.

Halfway through the banquet, it started to rain. Gu Chi worried that the night rain would delay his journey, and by the time he arrived, Li Zhi would already be asleep. Knocking on her window would upset her, so he became restless and uneasy.

Fortunately, his brother was also tired, and the banquet ended early. Gu Chi didn’t have time to change into a raincoat, so he wrapped the ball lantern and the box of mooncakes in an oilcloth and rode out.

…

On the day of the Mid-Autumn Festival, a time for family reunions, Li Zhi was not happy. Yesterday, the Li family sent some items and an elderly woman, claiming to be a doctor, to check on Li Zhi’s health.

Today, another letter arrived from home. After reading it, Li Zhi learned that the elderly woman came because the Li family was worried about Li Mu’s inability to conceive for a long time. They feared people would say the Li family’s daughters were all infertile, so they specially invited the woman to check on Li Mu during her eldest brother’s child’s first birthday banquet. Publicly, they said the woman was there to help the old lady with her health, arriving half a month early to avoid suspicion.

Li Zhi’s mother was strong-willed and refused to believe the rumors that Li Zhi couldn’t conceive. Taking advantage of the Mid-Autumn Festival, she sent the elderly woman to Mingyue Nunnery to secretly check on Li Zhi as well.

Yesterday, the elderly woman returned, saying that Li Zhi’s body indeed had difficulty conceiving. Li Zhi’s mother, unable to vent her anger on the elderly woman, fearing she would leave and upset the old lady, directed all her frustration at Li Zhi. In the letter, she scolded her, saying how useless she was and that even if she died in the nunnery, she wouldn’t come back.

Li Zhi knew her mother was just harsh with her words. If she really died in the nunnery, her mother would make a bigger fuss than anyone. But she still felt extremely hurt and had been in a daze since reading the letter.

At night, it started to rain. Li Zhi remembered the two pots of chrysanthemums Gu Chi had sent, still outside. She got up to bring them in and sat staring at them for a long time. Shivering, she realized her clothes were wet from the rain and needed to change quickly. She took clean clothes from the wardrobe and couldn’t help but cry again. Before she could change out of her wet clothes, she heard a knock on the window.

Startled, Li Zhi stared at the window in a daze. The knocking sounded again, and she went to open it.

The night wind and rain blew in, and there he was, standing outside. Seeing her wet clothes and tear-streaked face, he climbed in without hesitation and closed the window to keep her from catching a cold.

“Why are you crying?” he asked.

Li Zhi shook her head, unwilling to tell him.

At a loss, Gu Chi could only urge her to change her clothes.

Li Zhi returned to the bedside, glanced towards the window, and saw Gu Chi with his back to her. She then took off her wet monk’s robe and inner shirt and changed into clean clothes. She also removed her hat and let her wet hair down, the black strands falling in stark contrast to the plain, wide monk’s robe.

“I’m done changing,” she said. Gu Chi turned around, his eyes slightly trembling at the sight of her with her hair down as if he was rooted to the spot.

“Your clothes are wet, too,” Li Zhi reminded him.

“…It’s fine,” he replied, and Li Zhi said no more.

One stood by the window, the other by the bed, both silent for a while. Gu Chi then said, “I brought you something.”

Li Zhi replied, “As if you ever come without bringing something.”

Gu Chi took out a ball lantern and mooncakes from the oilcloth. Seeing that Li Zhi didn’t come over, he walked towards her.

The closer he got, the harder it was for him to take his eyes off her. Playing with the ball lantern seemed to improve Li Zhi’s mood. By the candlelight, her soft lips uttered a familiar complaint, “I told you, I’m not a child.”

“Always bringing me children’s things to coax me.”

Gu Chi asked her, “Do you like it?”

Whether it’s a child’s thing or not, do you like it? Does receiving this make you happy?

Hearing Gu Chi ask her this for the first time, Li Zhi was silent for a moment. She didn’t lie and said, “I like it.”

Gu Chi lowered his head to touch her lips as if wanting to swallow her “like” into his stomach.

Li Zhi hesitated, knowing she should push Gu Chi away, but…

Why push him away? After all, she couldn’t conceive and was no longer pure. Why should she be afraid? Why couldn’t she… indulge herself once and be happy?

This time, even though her legs went weak from the kiss, she didn’t push him away. Instead, Gu Chi, sensing something was wrong, stopped and asked her, “What’s wrong?”

Li Zhi, lightly panting, didn’t speak, just looked at him, making him unable to resist. He lowered his head and kissed her lips again.

When Li Zhi couldn’t stand anymore, she grabbed Gu Chi’s clothes. As he held her, she no longer suppressed the whimpers in her throat, unable to bear it, tears welling up in the corners of her eyes.

Before they knew it, they were on the bed, clothes falling one by one onto the mattress. In the cold rain of the night, Li Zhi cried out that she was cold, and Gu Chi used his body to warm her. They were drenched in sweat but didn’t separate, instead becoming more entwined, the old bed frame creaking under the cover of the rain.

…

The next day, the wind stopped, and the rain ceased. The dark blue light outside the window indicated it was early morning, not yet fully bright. The washed-out old bed curtains divided the bed from the rest of the room into two worlds.

Outside the bed was the simple nunnery room with old furniture. The only bright spots of color were the two pots of chrysanthemums by the door.

Inside the bed, soft bodies were tightly embraced by strong arms, skin touching, hair tangled, and there was an indescribable intimacy.

Gu Chi hadn’t slept, and neither had Li Zhi. Although she was exhausted, too tired to lift a finger, she couldn’t sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she would open them again.

Li Zhi found Gu Chi’s body too hot and moved back a little, but the warmth immediately followed, like a clingy puppy she couldn’t shake off.

Li Zhi wanted to tell him it was getting late and that he should leave.

Unexpectedly, Gu Chi spoke first, saying the words he had said countless times before: “Qiongshi, marry me.”

Last night, during their tender moments, Gu Chi had asked Li Zhi to call him A Chi, and Li Zhi had told him her courtesy name.

Li Zhi was silent for a moment, then replied with her hoarse voice from crying, “You should go.”

Gu Chi hadn’t expected Li Zhi to be so heartless. Before dawn, they had been passionately entwined, but after dawn, she could drive him out of bed and ask him to forget what happened last night and leave quickly.

Gu Chi had no choice. He dressed and tidied up the room, telling Li Zhi that he had to go to Anzhou and would return in November.

From the bed, Li Zhi softly replied, “Hmm.”

Gu Chi climbed out of the window but didn’t leave.

There was a morning class at the nunnery, and if Li Zhi didn’t attend, someone would come to check on her. Gu Chi heard Li Zhi tell the person that she was sick. The person didn’t suspect anything and even brought a stove for boiling medicine, then reluctantly left.

Gu Chi said he would return to the capital in November, but even his brother Lin Que knew how determined he was.

The matter in Anzhou, including handling the situation and the round trip, would take until November. But Gu Chi missed Li Zhi too much. He didn’t rush through the tasks but traveled day and night without rest, managing to return to the capital by the end of October.

As soon as Li Zhi saw Gu Chi, she smelled medicine. Gu Chi said it was the herbs he had brought from the south, but Li Zhi’s cold expression forced him to tell the truth—he had rushed too much and had an accident on the way, getting slightly injured.

“It’s not serious, it’s already been treated,” Gu Chi said.

Li Zhi didn’t believe him and told him to take off his clothes.

Gu Chi wasn’t lying; the injury wasn’t serious, but it covered a large area and had been treated, though the dressing hadn’t been changed for two days.

Li Zhi sternly changed his dressing.

Looking at Li Zhi so close, Gu Chi couldn’t help but think of that night. After she finished changing his dressing, he wrapped his arm around her.

He called her name.

And then… then he was kicked out by Li Zhi.

Even the herbs he brought were taken out of the window by Li Zhi and heavily placed on the windowsill: “Take them! If you don’t, you’ll never come back!”

With that, she slammed the window shut, almost breaking the old frame.

Gu Chi: “…”

This time, she was furious.