“I don’t dance.”

As Ruth said this to Ail, who was trying to lead him out, Ail nodded.

“There’s no need to worry. It would be damaging to me if rumors spread that my lover can’t even dance properly. Besides, dancing with a man at a ball isn’t fun.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

Despite saying this, Ruth wasn’t in a good mood. He had a feeling Ail would definitely end up dancing with Salina once they entered the ballroom. But it was none of his business. Still, something about it bothered him. He had never attended an official event with Ail before, so he didn’t know how he interacted with others. But somehow, he felt like he would be especially kind to women. Whether acting or not, Ail was known for being courteous and gentlemanly to women, even if his bed was only for men. Surely, he would dance with the women, and that woman would probably be…

As Ruth thought this, he suddenly shook his head fiercely as he walked behind Ail. It was none of his concern. Whether Ail danced with men or women, or even if he danced with Salina, it didn’t matter. He couldn’t even pretend to be jealous. That wasn’t in his nature.

“What’s wrong?”

Surprised by Ruth’s sudden movement, Ail asked.

“Nothing. I just kept having distracting thoughts…”

“You sure are thorough. Your hair’s a mess.”

Because of his sudden movement, the hair that the woman had fixed earlier got tangled. Embarrassed, Ruth raised his left hand to fix his hair, but as he did so, Ail, who had stopped, reached out and began to fix it for him. The gentle touch made Ruth’s heart race.

“I’ll do it.”

“All done.”

They had been this close countless times, and had even been in each other’s arms many times. Yet, every time Ail came so close, Ruth’s face would flush, and his heart would race. It was becoming a serious issue. Ail’s teasing about him being a virgin was likely due to this hypersensitivity.

“All done.”

As Ruth lowered his face, feeling embarrassed, Ail spoke and then took his arm again. As he led him, Ruth thought that he didn’t want this path to end. He wished it could go on forever, that he could just keep holding his arm.

But he couldn’t. This arm was something he would have to let go of eventually. It wasn’t his to begin with. He couldn’t be greedy or jealous, nor could he watch from a distance with envy.

Remembering the words he kept repeating to herself, Ruth kept his composure, looking straight ahead and holding his head high. But what he didn’t realize was that his hand was gripping Ail’s arm tightly, as if he were clinging to his last lifeline.

When Ail and Ruth entered, the orchestra stopped playing, and everyone in the ballroom bowed in greeting to the two of them. Ail led Ruth across the ballroom with ease, while Ruth was tense. It was his first time appearing at such an official event with Ail. As Ruth walked with a flushed face, Ail glanced at him and whispered.

“Smile. Pretend to be happy.”

“I’m trying.”

Ruth replied with a stiff face and gripped Ail’s arm even tighter. Ail, surprised by the strength of his grip, looked down at him again. His arm felt numb, but it wasn’t from pain—more like a concern that his grip might cause the bandage on his hand to tear.

“Don’t you think my arm will be sore?”

With a smile, Ail whispered, and Ruth, startled, loosened his grip on his arm.

“Sorry.”

“I hate getting hurt in situations like this. Be careful with your hand.”

“I will.”

Ruth answered calmly, finally able to take a deep breath when he realized they had reached the center of the ballroom. Looking around at the people, Ruth glanced up at Ail. He seemed to be asking if it was okay to let go of his arm, and Ail lowered his arm first. Ruth followed suit and let go of his arm.

Standing at the center of the quiet hall, Ail looked down at Ruth with a kind gaze and raised his hand, signaling the start of the ball.

“We don’t need to waste time, so let’s get started. Let the festivities begin. Enjoy yourselves.”

With Ail’s declaration, the orchestra began to play again. This ball, which had started three years ago, was becoming an annual event led by the Crown Prince after the Emperor’s illness. Ruth, who had been worried he would have to stand in silence for a long time, exhaled a light breath at the quick start. Watching him, Ail took Ruth’s right hand, raised it, and kissed the back of his hand.

Ruth was taken aback by his actions. Ail had been unusually excessive today. Even though it was meant to be a display, his affection felt too overwhelming. In the past, Ail had always been playful, but today, his kindness was too much—it almost made Ruth question if he had feelings for him.

“Take a seat.”

Ail, speaking in a voice so soft and secretive it almost brought tears to Ruth’s eyes, gently led him to his assigned seat. As the music resumed, people in gorgeous dresses and expensive suits began to dance again. Ruth, who had only just arrived, was already starting to feel bored.

He felt out of place in this setting, as if he didn’t belong here.

Seeing the awkward expression on Ruth’s face, Ail bent down and whispered in his ear, stroking his hair as he spoke.

“Your brother’s watching from nine o’clock. Smile.”

Ruth looked in that direction and, as expected, saw Eilen standing there. Ail waved to him with a smile, and Eilen, with a stiff expression, bowed his head in return. Ruth didn’t know what to do, so he simply stared at Eilen. Suddenly, someone approached Ail and greeted him. Ail’s attention shifted, and Eilen motioned with his chin, signaling Ruth to follow him. Ruth tilted his head in confusion, but Eilen gestured to another direction. Turning, Ruth saw Salina, dressed in a red gown, walking gracefully toward them.

Salina had her black hair tied up, which emphasized her delicate, pale neck. The butterfly-shaped necklace around her neck and the butterfly-shaped hairpin that hung from her hair gave the impression that butterflies were flying around her, and Ruth was mesmerized by her beauty. She was the most beautiful woman in the ballroom. She was a flower.

While Ruth was lost in his thoughts, Salina approached Ail and greeted him with a slight bow.

“Good to see you again, Your Highness. It’s good to see you too, Commander.”

Ruth snapped back to reality when he heard Salina’s soft voice. He hurriedly bowed his head to greet her, and Ail smiled and responded.

“Good to see you again.”

“Yes. However, Commander, I have a request.”

Ruth widened his eyes at Salina’s sudden words, but Salina smiled and continued.

“Would you grant me the honor of dancing with you?”

Wondering why she was speaking to him, Ruth stared blankly. But before he could respond, Ail spoke for him.

“Such a request should be made to me.”

“You should ask your lover first. Would that be okay, Commander?”

There was no way Ruth could refuse such a request in this situation. He forced a smile and gave his permission.

“Ah, yes. Please go ahead.”

“Are you okay on your own?”

As if they had planned it together, this time it was Ail who spoke to Ruth with a worried tone. Suddenly, Ruth felt uneasy.
“I’m fine. I just have a slight headache, so I’ll take a short walk.”
As Ruth stood up first, Ail asked if he was okay. Ruth replied that he was fine and, before they went to dance, he turned and began walking towards the outside of the ballroom. It was rude, but he didn’t have the energy to care about such things right now. No, he just didn’t want to think about it.

His mood was getting worse. He made a firm resolve not to look back and walked towards the railing outside the hall. But just as he was about to open the door leading to the railing, a small gasp echoed from inside the hall. Instinctively turning his head at the sound, Ruth saw Ail dancing with Salina.

The sight of them made it hard for him to breathe. His heart felt as though it had stopped. They were such a beautiful couple. Two people with perfect beauty and perfect harmony. The sight of them, like a picture, filled him with admiration, but at the same time, pain pierced his heart. He didn’t know why he was suffering like this, but it definitely hurt. His heart felt like it was about to burst.

Perhaps it already had.

He didn’t know why it hurt so much. No, in truth, he did know. He just didn’t want to admit it.

Unknowingly clutching the pendant around his neck, Ruth turned his body, opened the door, and stepped out to the railing. The cool air of the night helped calm his mind.

“Ha…”
Ruth let out a sigh as he leaned against the railing. For a moment, he thought that if he kept staring at Ail, he might just die right there.

It was a foolish attachment. It was childish and pitiful. He had been able to endure and suppress his feelings up to this point, so why was he suddenly unable to control herself?

Until now, he hadn’t cared who Ail danced with. He hadn’t felt this pain before. But strangely, when he saw Salina with him, his heart ached. Why was she so special? Ruth couldn’t answer that question, but she just didn’t like her. Salina’s beauty, her youth, and the passion with which she pursued Ail were all things Ruth envied and despised. What he hated even more was that Salina was clearly aiming for Ail’s side, and she was someone who truly deserved to be there.

Yes, Ruth had to admit it. He was jealous of Salina, the one who could stand proudly beside Ail and receive his love.

Biting his lip, Ruth lowered his head, but then he heard someone approaching in the garden. The guards, stationed a little distance away from the mansion, wouldn’t have come this close. Was someone intruding? Ruth tensed up as he heard a familiar voice.

“Ruth?”

Emerging from behind the trees in the garden was Elsen.

“Huh? Elsen? What are you doing here?”

At Ruth’s question, Elsen laughed, as if questioning his silly words.

“What do you mean, what am I doing here? I was called for the hunting competition. But what about you, why are you out here?”

The soldiers and knights, who were keeping watch, knew Ruth would attend the ball with Ail. Elsen would naturally know as well, so Ruth gave a bitter smile and answered.

“Oh, just… I have a headache. This place doesn’t suit me.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Let’s just take a walk.”

Ruth lightly leaned on the railing with his left hand and jumped down to the garden. Seeing this, Elsen frowned as if something was off.

“Why? Aren’t you going into the hall?”

“I told you, it doesn’t suit me.”

It was true that it didn’t suit him, but Ruth no longer wanted to be in the hall. He had already shown his face, and Ail wouldn’t specifically look for him. She planned to pass the time with Elsen, strolling around. More than anything, he didn’t want to see Ail right now. If he did, he felt he’d have to face emotions he didn’t want to acknowledge. And he hated that.

“Let’s take a slow walk around.”

As Ruth patted Elsen’s shoulder, he looked at him for a moment and then asked.

“That pendant…”

“Oh, Ail gave it to me to borrow.”

“This is the symbol of the Jenin family.”

“Yeah. He said it was from the Empress.”

After that, there was a brief silence. Elsen looked seriously at the pendant hanging around Ruth’s neck.

“To give you something so precious… he must really care for you.”

“Huh?”