Chapter 49: Memories That Never Fade

Gillian kept pressing, relentless in his questioning. Lara was gripped by sudden fear but stubbornly held back her tears. She refused to foolishly cry in front of him.

“I don’t know what you want from me, but I’ve never done anything to harm either you or the Lady. So please, just leave me alone. If there’s something you want, I’ll do my best to fulfill it. So, please….”

It was humiliating. Even as she searched for a way to fight back, nothing came to mind. Lara was utterly isolated here, an outsider in every sense.

She carried the inescapable stigma of being a runaway slave. And now, of all people, she had encountered her former master. As Gillian had said, fine clothing might disguise her lowly origins, but the scars of her enslavement were etched into her, as indelible as the brand on her body.

The name “Oppreese” was still marked on her skin, and no amount of scrubbing could erase it. Memories of her previous life flooded back—how her adoptive father and even her husband had hidden everything from her. Alec, too, had worked tirelessly to conceal her status as a runaway slave.

It wasn’t until Valerie exposed the truth that the world learned of her origins. The emotional wounds from that moment still burned vividly. While regaining her memories in this life had numbed her to such shocks, back then, the revelation had left her reeling.

The realization that even her adoptive father, the one person she had trusted, had deceived her was crushing. She had been so overcome with shame and despair that she attempted to end her life. She couldn’t bear to live with the humiliation of being unmasked as a slave.

When the truth came out, no one in the palace wanted to serve her as a lady-in-waiting—not even when she was the First Empress. That memory was as sharp as ever. She had fallen ill, bedridden with fever, overwhelmed by the scandal.

No matter what title she held—who she married, whose child she bore—people still saw her as a slave.

They mocked her, claiming that a woman who should have lived as nothing more than a concubine dared to dream of becoming an empress. When she lost her first child, they sneered that it was her punishment for overreaching, for wanting something she was never meant to have.

Even her grief over her child’s death became fodder for gossip, a source of ridicule.

The thought that her carefully buried past might resurface in this life was maddening. She could see the faces of those who had scorned her in her previous life, superimposed over Gillian’s. Her fear was suffocating, but there was also a burning desire to tear that smug face to shreds.

“Do you expect me to stand by and watch someone like you parading around here?” Gillian’s voice turned harsh, his expression menacing. “A slave like you, stealing the man who should belong to my sister, acting as if you’re a prince’s wife? Huh? Lara, you lowly, stupid little wench.”

His cruel words cut deep. Lara stared back at him, her eyes heavy with despair, tears beginning to pool and tremble uncontrollably.

Gillian smirked, his lips curling. His piercing gaze flickered with a chaotic, almost feral, desire that burned blue like a consuming flame.

“Rose.“

Startled, Gillian turned around, his expression betraying his surprise. Lara, equally taken aback, quickly wiped away her tears and looked toward the voice. Behind Alec stood one of his attendants and Valerie.

“What were you doing here?”

Alec asked, his tone cold and direct. He didn’t even acknowledge Gillian’s presence, a deliberate snub that didn’t go unnoticed. Gillian’s face briefly twisted in irritation, but he quickly smoothed it over with a practiced smile.

“You’ve come to find your lady, I see,” Gillian said with forced politeness.

“I didn’t expect to find my consort in your company, Sir Gillian.”

“I discovered the lady while she was resting,” Gillian replied, his tone as composed as he could manage.

The conversation stopped there. Alec did not pull his lips into a smile, nor did he offer further words. He simply stared at the man with a heavy, leaden gaze, as though his very presence weighed the air around him. His eyes burned with an oppressive darkness, one that threatened to flay the flesh and reduce it to minced meat.

“I beg your forgiveness,” Gillian said, dropping to his knees.

“I will not challenge Your Highness again.”

Alec’s expression remained unreadable. He didn’t trust the man. Nobles always acted deferential before him, bowing their heads and dropping to their knees the moment his demeanor hardened.

Even when Gillian apologized for disparaging Lara’s background and lineage, Alec knew the man’s hatred wouldn’t fade. To the nobility, Lara would always be an outsider—a woman who climbed too high, a trespasser in their world. They saw her as an unworthy intruder, a lowly courtesan who had slept with a noble man and borne his child. The more Alec shielded and defended her, the sharper the contempt they harbored.

Alec recalled the time when he wiped out several noble houses. It happened not long after Lara conceived Loras. It was during the process of recruiting maids for her service.

The humiliation and disgrace Lara endured during that period were unforgettable, etched into her bones and soul like an indelible scar. No noble family wanted to offer their daughters as maids to serve her.

A slave-born empress—worse, one who had been a slave in the Offrese household, the maternal family of the Second Empress. Serving her, they claimed, would bring dishonor to their families.

When the deadline passed and no one volunteered, Lara’s personal maid sent letters to noble families to fill the role, but the maid’s visible distress revealed that something was deeply amiss. Lara realized the situation too late. But there was nothing she could do.

There had been so many moments like that in Lara’s life—moments of unrelenting isolation and humiliation. Even while standing beside Alec, she bore a private anguish that no one else could comprehend. And when her son Loras’s mental faculties deteriorated, the pain only deepened. No one empathized with her suffering.

Even if Alec loved her deeply, he could never fully understand her loneliness and sorrow.

Their circumstances were fundamentally different. Alec, even after spending over a decade in Loras as an orphan, was still royalty. His status had remained immutable, even in the days when he scavenged for food and lived in dirt. But Lara…

“How dare they pull this wretched nonsense…”

Alec discovered the source of the rumors claiming that serving the slave-born empress would ruin a noble girl’s future prospects. They had said that becoming her maid would tarnish one’s reputation, making it impossible to marry into a good family or live honorably.

Alec tracked down the originators of these rumors and ordered their immediate execution. Those who dared spread such words paid for their slander with their lives.

Lara felt no joy. Even if someone had maliciously spread rumors, the fact remained that noble daughters did not want to serve as her maids.

Valerie. Yes, it was Valerie. It was said that the rumors at the time originated from the Second Empress’s faction. Although the Second Empress had publicly distanced herself from those who spread the rumors, Lara didn’t believe her.

Alec tracked down those who maliciously demeaned her and slaughtered them. He killed people with such excessive brutality that even Valerie’s closest confidant, her nursemaid, met a gruesome end. Yet none of this brought any solace to Lara.

Even as lives were lost one after another, and a storm of bloodshed swept through, Lara couldn’t dismiss the rumors as baseless. The truth was that the nobility looked down on her. Valerie’s side might have added fuel to the fire, but in a situation where everyone already despised Lara, no one would think well of a young noblewoman working as her maid.

For noble families in Travis with promising sons, such a blemish would not go unnoticed. A girl associated with Lara would find it impossible to marry into a good family, as her parents might hope. Naturally, people avoided her.

“I’m fine,” she said.

By the time the palace was steeped in fear of death, Lara approached Alec and begged him to stop punishing people.

At that point, Alec seemed like a madman desperate to kill. He had murdered his brothers and slaughtered his young nephews, as though intent on wiping out the royal bloodline entirely.

People naturally feared the emperor. But Lara didn’t fear him. She simply felt a pang of sorrow.

It hurt her to see him killing his brothers and nephews for her sake. That’s why she asked him to stop. Extending the slaughter would only harm his reputation as the new emperor.

But Alec didn’t stop. The more Lara tried to dissuade him, the angrier he seemed. Eventually, he even targeted Valerie’s family, going so far as to harm her brother. That year, Gillian was executed, with embezzlement of military funds being his main charge.

Before the executioner’s axe fell, Gillian’s eyes were burned out, followed by his limbs being torn apart. Only after his torso was left groaning and writhing did the axe finally fall on his neck. It was a horrific and brutal death.

Alec only stopped his spree of killings after Gillian’s death. He then personally selected maids for Lara, from the head maid to the youngest attendants, and handed them over to her. When Lara eventually left for a separate palace, she dismissed them all except for Madame Rossienne, her head maid.

The animosity toward Lara began to fade only after that storm had passed. But she always knew. Just because people no longer showed open malice didn’t mean they accepted her. Lara remained an outsider in their world until her death.

“I also beg Her Highness’s forgiveness. Please, do not forgive me for daring to challenge you,” Gillian, who had knelt before Alec, now turned toward Lara and knelt once more.

Unsure of what to say, Lara’s lips trembled as she searched for words.

“Rise,” she managed to utter softly.

At her words, Gillian stood, his sharp eyes flashing. Lara hadn’t believed his apology from the start, but she hadn’t expected him to look at her with such piercing eyes, even as he begged for forgiveness.

Feeling threatened, Lara said no more. She mumbled a vague response and left the scene. Valerie’s gaze briefly followed Lara as she passed, but Lara didn’t spare her even a glance.

Alec’s hand shot out and gripped Lara’s arm firmly.

“Come with me,” he said, his face set in a grim expression.

“Your Majesty, please stay a little longer and enjoy the gathering. This event was arranged in your honor.”

The Marquis of Heslo hosted the banquet to mark Alecs return to Dranberk. After spending more than a decade secluded in the countryside, it was time for him to re-establish his presence through the Marquis, drawing attention and gathering people around him.

If Alec couldn’t shine in such a gathering because of Lara, what would be the point? Lara didn’t want to tarnish Alec’s reputation because of herself. She didn’t want to be the reason his honor was diminished, which is why she didn’t immediately return to the estate. If she hadn’t cared about what people said about them, she might have fled the moment she regained her senses.

However, Lara didn’t want rumors to spread that Alec had lost his mind because of a slave woman he had taken as his wife. Just as she didn’t want to live a lonely life as his empress, she refused to let such talk surround her.

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The return journey occurred after the evening banquet on the second day. Lara, feeling utterly drained, couldn’t muster the energy to attend the outing scheduled for the following day. Instead, she boarded the carriage that evening.

When they departed, Alec received an enthusiastic send-off, nearly akin to being hoisted into the air in celebration. Those gathered couldn’t hide their interest in the enormous fortune bestowed upon him by the late emperor, the sole legitimate heir and youngest child of the imperial line.

Although Alec hadn’t been named crown prince, the late emperor had secured his status by granting him titles reserved only for the crown prince: Grand Lord of Everlyn and Gissen. These titles solidified his position and identity.

The reason Alec wasn’t executed immediately after Rubero ascended the throne was a topic of public speculation among the nobility. Many believed it was due to the overwhelming authority and immense wealth entrusted to him.

The late emperor had gone so far as to include a clause in his will stating that if Alec were to die, his vast inheritance would not return to the royal family but instead be donated entirely to the banks. It was an undeniable attempt to protect his youngest legitimate son from his elder brother’s ambitions.

For this reason, the day of his departure was met with a bustling, if not celebratory, farewell from the nobles. Alec was the first to board the carriage from the Marquis of Heslo’s estate.

He gently supported his pregnant wife’s slender waist as they entered the carriage together, receiving send-offs from key figures in Dranverk and several high-ranking nobles. Many of them were weary of Rubero’s increasingly erratic domestic policies.

Rubero’s recent appointments over the past few years lacked balance. His actions were shaped by the insecurities and resentment of his youth, leading him to demote anyone who had threatened his biological mother, regardless of their titles or positions. Those who opposed him were imprisoned indiscriminately, further tarnishing his reputation among the aristocracy as both an unfit and ill-mannered emperor.

But it didn’t stop with demotions and imprisonments. Recently, Rubero’s excessive measures to blockade Constansium following its revolution had caused significant diplomatic friction.

Even though it was a precaution against republican sentiment spilling into the empire, Constansium was Empostium’s closest ally and a longstanding partner. Cutting ties over a revolutionary movement, which was unlikely to last long, seemed rash. After all, the royalist faction in Constansium remained dominant for now.

Rubero’s reign was heading toward a precipice. The nobles, who had previously criticized his lack of legitimacy, now openly voiced concerns about his unstable governance.