Chapter 33

“Tangtang, be good, Tangtang, be good…” Shi Chengyu softly coaxed her. Whenever Shen Chutang felt uncomfortable, he would pat her back like this, calling her name over and over again.

When they were young, they were both not very healthy. Shen Chutang was weak and got sick frequently, while he was slow to react, didn’t talk to anyone, and even when he was young, some people said he was mentally retarded and would grow up to be a fool.

But after they moved to Lanjiang Court, their conditions improved a lot. They gradually became more cheerful and willing to play with others. He didn’t become a fool, but instead became a shining star in his circle.

When Shen Chutang cried, she would only calm down when she was next to Shi Chengyu.

Both families thought it was magical, as if they were destined to be together.

Shi Chengyu put her head on his shoulder, stroking her back. “Tangtang, be good, you’ll feel better soon.”

Shen Chutang sobbed, her voice thick with a heavy nasal tone. “You, you’re lying, I feel terrible.”

“My head is going to fall off.”

Shi Chengyu felt both heartache and amusement. “Brother Chengyu is here, it won’t fall off.”

He reached out and touched the back of her neck, his voice gentle. “It’s still there.”

Shen Chutang, feeling dizzy, reached out and touched her neck, her thinking slowed down. “Brother Chengyu.”

Their hands touched, Shi Chengyu naturally held her hand in his. “What’s wrong?”

Shen Chutang looked up, her eyes misty. “Brother Chengyu.”

“Hmm.”

Shen Chutang called him again, but didn’t continue.

“Brother Chengyu.”

Shen Chutang’s voice was soft and light, her gaze fell on his chin, then slowly moved upwards, looking at his lips, then suddenly laughed.

Her heart beat rapidly under the influence of the alcohol. Her hands suddenly cupped Shi Chengyu’s face, she had done this many times before.

Maybe her mood was different now, maybe the alcohol was intoxicating, the atmosphere in the car suddenly became heated and subtly alluring.

Shen Chutang slowly, inch by inch, leaned closer. She wanted to kiss him, just wanted to kiss him, tonight, right now.

In the silent car, it was unclear who’s heartbeat went out of rhythm first.

Shi Chengyu unconsciously held his breath, watching the pink slowly approaching, as if he was under a spell, unable to move.

But when Shen Chutang was about to kiss him, he suddenly turned his head. Her soft lips brushed past his cheek, that side of his face instantly felt like it was going to burn up.

His Adam’s apple unconsciously rolled. His voice was hoarse, “Tang, Tangtang…”

Shen Chutang looked at him in a daze, her eyes full of confusion. She said, “Brother Chengyu, I want to kiss you.”

Seeing that Shi Chengyu didn’t answer, she said again, “You can kiss me too.”

She acted so generously and magnanimously, but it completely made Shi Chengyu lose his ability to think, his words came out stuttering. “Tangtang… you’re still young.”

Shen Chutang frowned. After a while, she probably understood what he meant. He was rejecting her.

Her somewhat unclear mind instantly flashed back to the scene she saw at Shi’s house that day, and the incident of being mistaken for his sister.

Shi Chengyu wanted to hug her, but Shen Chutang stubbornly leaned back, refusing. She looked up at him, her eyes already moist. “But I want to.”

From the time she was little, Shi Chengyu never rejected her when she wanted to do something. If it was something she really couldn’t do, he would coax her. But now he was hesitating, his eyes dodging, not daring to look at Shen Chutang’s eyes. He rejected her firmly.

“Tangtang, you’re drunk, we’ll talk about it when you sober up.” Shi Chengyu said softly.

Shen Chutang stubbornly looked at him. “I’m not drunk, I just have a headache.”

“I’m already sober.”

Shen Chutang said this and got off his lap, wobbling as she sat down in the seat next to him. The sadness and disappointment overwhelmed her, making her sober up a bit.

Shen Chutang leaned her head against the car window, watching the cars and pedestrians passing by. The colorful lights became blurry in her eyes, her tears blurred her vision and soaked her clothes.

Shi Chengyu called her name helplessly, but Shen Chutang didn’t respond, just maintaining her posture with her back to him.

Seeing Shen Chutang feeling terrible, his heart ached even more than hers. He didn’t know how to explain it to her.

The other side of the car window was knocked. Shi Chengyu hesitated for a second and opened the door.

Lin Shulang had bought some hangover medicine and a cup of honey water. Seeing the atmosphere in the car was not right, he handed them over and closed the door, waiting outside.

“Tangtang, drink some water first.”

Shen Chutang twisted her shoulders. “No, I’m already sober, I don’t have a headache.”

“Okay, then drink some water, okay?”

“I want to go home.”

Shen Chutang choked, wiping her blurry eyes with the back of her hand.

“Okay…”

Shi Chengyu’s voice was hoarse. The thermos cup in his hand became a hot potato. He lowered the window and handed it to Lin Shulang.

The car started driving again in the night. This was the first time Lin Shulang saw the two of them arguing. He drove very carefully all the way.

When they arrived at the entrance of the villa, as soon as the car stopped, Shen Chutang pushed the door open and ran out. But she wasn’t completely sober yet, she wobbled as she walked. She really wanted to go home, not to Shi Chengyu’s house.

Shi Chengyu quickly got out of the car and pulled her back, his voice urgent, “Tangtang.”

“I want to go home.” Shen Chutang said with a sob.

“Be good, Tangtang, come back with me.” Shi Chengyu hugged her. There was no one else at Shen’s house except the servants. How could he bear to let her go back alone.

Shen Chutang didn’t struggle, just silently shed tears. She seemed to understand suddenly.

She didn’t treat Shi Chengyu as a brother. What about Shi Chengyu? Did he treat her as a sister?

He always told her to be good, using the tone he used to talk to children. He even called her “little girl” last time. Perhaps in his eyes, she’s always a child who hasn’t grown up.

In her almost seventeen years of life, the sense of defeat she had never experienced before made Shen Chutang suddenly become insecure.

He carried her back to her room and put her on the bed. He was about to reach out and touch her head, but Shen Chutang dodged away.

Shi Chengyu froze in place, his hand still suspended in mid-air, neither falling nor landing.

“Tangtang…” His voice was laced with disbelief. Even when Shen Chutang was most angry, she never refused his touch.

Shi Chengyu was a little helpless for a moment, his expression almost couldn’t be maintained.

“Brother Chengyu, I’ve grown up.” Shen Chutang said faintly.

She didn’t want him to treat her as a sister, nor did she want him to treat her like a child.

In the car, Shi Chengyu said she was still young and rejected her. Now, Shen Chutang said she’s grown up and rejected Shi Chengyu.

It was contradictory, but reasonable.

Shi Chengyu finally put his hand down, his heart filled with mixed emotions, bitterness and sourness mixed together.

Some things Shen Chutang didn’t understand, she didn’t understand, but he knew very well. He wasn’t unwilling, but unable.

Of course he could not dodge and let Shen Chutang kiss him. What would happen after that? What would Shen Chutang think when she sobered up?

He could bear the gossip and the slander, but Tangtang couldn’t. He couldn’t do those things to Shen Chutang when she didn’t understand anything.

But he didn’t know, in these years when he was suppressing and restraining himself, Shen Chutang had also quietly grown up, understanding what it meant to like someone, and just wanting to express it without reservation.