◎ Secret ◎

Those fragments of the soul almost tore Shi Li apart. They scrambled to pull, trying to drag her out of Chen Du’s body, trying to pull her back.

“Come back quickly!”

“Hurry and save Chen Du!”

“Chen Du is about to die!”

But just as they were about to tear her apart, Chen Du woke up.

Shi Li’s soul was detaching from his body.

Shi Li saw him open his eyes, with a trace of hazy confusion from half-awakening in them.

“Chen Du, Chen Du! I’m here!”

“I’m Shi Li!”

“Don’t do anything, I beg you, wait for me, wait for me…”

Shi Li shouted desperately at him, her soul struggling to get close to him.

However, the next second, her soul was once again forcefully drawn by the invisible force of the apartment’s barrier, rapidly pushed back, retreating into that untouchable place.

The world in her eyes blurred into light and shadows, including Chen Du.

The hospital bed, the girl on the bed, the narrow hospital corridor, the bustling crowd, the streets, the traffic…

Shi Li suddenly opened her eyes.

What she saw was a white wall, a familiar room, the apartment.

She was back again.

No, Chen Du was still there.

She had to stop Chen Du.

Shi Li tried desperately to pass through the walls, but the barrier’s immense force flung her back into the room.

Her soul felt almost shattered, and the headache was unbearable.

Those fragmented memories surged in her mind. They were too vast, too complex, as if they would burst her soul.
But she didn’t need time to digest them.

They were as familiar as her own body. They were a part of her, seamlessly merging into her soul.

Shi Li held her “head,” barely leaning on the desk to stand up.

The sorrow in her heart was like a bottomless black hole, devouring her.

In those years in the underworld, she occasionally reflected on her life. She always felt the world was numb to the point of suffocation.

Looking back on those twenty-plus years, there was only pain and darkness, nothing to be nostalgic about.

It was like being trapped in a filthy cover.

Turns out, she remembered wrong.

Turns out, no matter how bad the world was, she still persistently wanted to live.

More than anyone, she didn’t want to leave.

Because she was waiting for him to come home, and he was trying hard to come back.

When he returned, they would get married…

Shi Li bit down on her knuckles in pain, looking at the printed document on the desk, the page he had worked on for a long time—

“A Survival Guide for You”

“Shi Li, seeing this letter is like seeing me.

I don’t know what year or month it will be when you wake up.
Maybe this guide is already outdated.
The world in the future might be one I don’t understand.
But I always believe that you will wake up soon.

Besides medical and rehabilitation expenses, I’ve left you some extra money.
The bank card is in the drawer, the password is your birthday.
This money is enough for you to live carefree for several years, enough to support you in finding what you truly want to do.

Two years ago, I bought this apartment.
I hope you have a stable place to live in this city.
After all, only when a person has a place to stay can they face the unknown future with more confidence.

If life becomes hard to adapt to, go to my sister.
Her name is Shu Yun, a surgeon at the city hospital.
She will help you.

The world develops very fast.
When you open your eyes, everything may feel unfamiliar.
But please don’t be afraid.
You are the strongest, bravest, most optimistic, and cutest girl I’ve ever seen.
I promise you, the strangeness and unease will eventually pass.
Everything in the future will be better.

Take care of yourself. In the future, you will have a home, be loved, and embrace the world again.
Be brave and start your new life.

Do not miss me,
Chen Du.”

Just one page. He weighed each word, editing and revising for several days.

Every word was about her. Every word didn’t mention himself.

Even the final line Shi Li once saw, “I miss you so much,” was deleted by him.

Just like this house, all the traces of his existence had been erased.

“Do not miss me, Chen Du.”

He hoped she would not miss him.

He hoped she would start a new life without any burden.

—He didn’t even mention the reason for his departure.

“Xiao Chen, you’re only twenty-eight. You’re still young. If you take active treatment, there’s still a ten percent chance of a cure. But if you delay any longer, it will really be too late. Do you know what you’re doing?”

“The surgery is expensive, but for you, it should still be manageable. Are you that short on money? What money is more important than your life?”

Late-stage cancer has a one-in-ten cure rate. A vegetative person who’s been unconscious for five years has perhaps a one-in-ten-thousand chance of waking up.

Chen Du, who was great at math.

Chen Du, the top science student in the small town.

Chen Du, who graduated from the computer science department of Lin University—

Couldn’t calculate this simple probability.

He gave up on himself.

He left all his savings to her.

Just like back then, before leaving, he had arranged everything for her.

Shi Li touched her chest.

It was still empty, without a heartbeat.

There seemed to be no difference.

But in the fifth year after her death, she remembered a secret.

Chen Du’s secret.

Chen Du loved her.

Chen Du loved her deeply.

Loved her so much that he planned a future with her, lived hard for her, and gave up his future for her.

Even now, when he was dying, what he still couldn’t let go of—was her.

“But I don’t have any obsession, how can I complete this?”

The supervisor glanced coldly at her, but his tone was firm:

“You do.”

Shi Li didn’t understand back then.

Turns out she really did.

The obsession that forced her to return.

Even when her heart was empty, she still couldn’t let go.

“Chen Du, Chen Du, Chen Du!”

Shi Li desperately slammed against the apartment walls.

Her faint soul could not leave this apartment.

The steel and concrete around her could not confine her.

But the invisible barrier and shackles did.

She shut her eyes tightly and gathered her courage.

She had feared pain both in life and after death, but there was no choice.

“I must live! I want Chen Du to live!”

The soul doesn’t shed tears, nor does it feel pain.

But every collision felt like her soul was being torn apart.

Shi Li didn’t know how to describe that pain.

Her body trembled, yet she stubbornly opened her arms and crashed again and again into the barrier.

Not as dramatic as bloody wounds.

She just felt herself silently collapsing.

From the tips of her hair, to her chest, to her limbs.

That kind of disintegration was like a body slowly decaying.

No blood, no sound, yet penetrating the bones.

So painful she wanted to scream, wanted to kneel and beg, but not a single sound could come out.

—Perhaps even the underworld’s furnace was no more than this.

Shi Li looked down at herself.

She was becoming more and more transparent, like mist, gradually fading in the sunlight.

She seemed to be… really disappearing.

Shi Li sighed in sorrow, her mind full of Chen Du’s figure just walking away.

She stood by the window and suddenly opened her arms, smiling widely.

“Chen Du.”

“Chen Du.”

“No matter what, we will meet again.”

—Bang!

She heard something shatter.

Crisp and decisive.

She guessed it was herself that had shattered.

So the soul can break too?

But her consciousness didn’t vanish.

Instead, she felt some invisible shackle break.

The powerful resistance collapsed in an instant, replaced by an unprecedented lightness—so free it felt unfamiliar.

Shi Li slowly opened her eyes.

The night wind brushed her face, coldness seeped into her intangible body.

She saw herself, almost transparent, floating outside the twelfth floor of the apartment. Below was the dazzling night view of Beilin.

Lights from thousands of homes glimmered like stars, traffic on the overpass flowed endlessly, with all kinds of light trails weaving, stretching into the endless distance.

So beautiful.

Shi Li trembled in the night.

The shackles were gone.

The cries and screams from deep in her soul finally became clear.

She closed her eyes, carefully listening to those mad and desperate calls.

“Shi Li, come back quickly. Shi Li! Come back quickly, save Chen Du!”

She followed their guidance, letting her soul float in the air, passing through brightly lit streets, through streams of traffic, through the endless night.

Like a movie in slow motion, she returned to that crowded hospital, the dark corridor, the warm white ward—

She finally stood beside the hospital bed, gently opened her arms, and leaned down to embrace the sleeping beauty who had been lying there for five years.

“Beep beep beep——”

The heart rate monitor at the bedside urgently reported abnormal readings.

The frenzied heartbeat, the disordered breathing, the consciousness that had finally returned after five years of slumber…

It was like waking from a long nightmare, like walking alone in a fog-filled canyon and finally seeing a faint glimmer of light.

Shi Li struggled to open her eyes. Her vision was blurry, and there was a white halo around everything.

She looked at the doctors and nurses in white coats beside the bed. She opened her mouth, trying to say something, but no sound came out.

The ventilator was still attached. With each breath, white mist spread out, obscuring her view.

Chaotic and noisy voices sounded in her ears—

“Where are her family members? Didn’t they come today?”

“I think I saw him about an hour ago. He probably hasn’t gone far.”

“Xiao Zhou, call her family. Miss Shi Li, can you hear me…”

Shi Li blinked, indicating she could hear. She reached out her hand, weakly and trembling, toward the nurse.

The nurse who was making the call froze for a moment, and only after a few seconds did she realize what Shi Li wanted. After a brief hesitation, she brought the phone close to her lips.

“Beep——beep——beep——”

The call connected.

After many years, Chen Du’s voice once again reached her ears, warm yet unfamiliar.

“Hello, Nurse Zhou, this is Chen Du.”

In that moment, Shi Li could not hold back her tears.

She opened her mouth, choking up, trying to make a sound, but her vocal cords, unused for years, would not obey, leaving only silent sobs.

A few seconds later, the voice on the other end hesitated and asked, “Nurse Zhou, can you hear me? Did something happen to my wife?”

He said, wife.

Shi Li’s tears streamed down her face. She tilted her head slightly and desperately brought her lips closer to the phone’s microphone. Everyone in the ward held their breath and stared at her.

“Chen…”

“Du…”

Her throat felt like it was burning in flames. Just those two words seemed to consume all her strength.

In that instant, the other end of the line fell into a deathly silence.

Then came the sudden, chaotic breathing, transmitted along the phone line to her ear.

Shi Li bit her lip and used all her strength to squeeze out each word from the depths of her throat.

“Didn’t you say… no matter what… you wouldn’t… leave me…”

“Do you… want to…”

“Break… your promise…”