Font Size:
“June 1, 2008, Children’s Day, Weather: Sunny!”
“Tang Lei and I lay on the grass of the school playground, enjoying the fine weather and the fresh air, temporarily free from the chore of doing laundry, stealing a half-day of leisure!”
“A father and his son strolled slowly past the playground. The father carried his son on his shoulder, amusing him with hearty laughter. That father, with only one leg and one arm…”
“Tang Lei and I were both stunned, staring closely for a few moments. Seeing the son’s joyful expression on his father’s broad back, we couldn’t help but sigh. Perhaps the tallest mountain he would ever climb in his lifetime was his father. And despite missing an arm and a leg, this father resolutely hoisted his son upon his shoulders…”
“Tang Lei stood up from the grass, staring blankly at the scene, evidently reminded of something. Today was Children’s Day, a day of utmost joy for some children! Tang Lei had never seen his parents, and neither had I. Back when we used to sleep together, we often fantasized about what our parents looked like. Lost in those thoughts, sleep would evade us…”
“I should have parents too, I just haven’t seen them!”
“Tang Lei kept on speculating about what his parents would look like, what kind of work they might do, how they would be. And now, I recalled that pair of father and son, despite missing limbs!”
“I should have parents too. My mother should have big eyes, be tall, and beautiful. She must be the gentlest and kindest person in the world!”
“I should have parents too. My mother should be around thirty years old, similar to Teacher Zhao from the orphanage. She would always speak softly, no matter what we did wrong, she would patiently and carefully teach us!!
“My mother should be the best mother in the world! No one could ever be better than her!”
…
Returning home, hastily finishing dinner in the dining room, Xu Xuehui retreated to her room.
Suddenly, her phone rang. It was her eldest sister, Xu Wanting, sending a message.
She didn’t say anything, just sent a diary, an article.
This is probably a diary written by Xu Mo when he was in the first year of junior high at the age of thirteen. His elder sister retrieved it from her phone and sent it to hers.
Elder sister didn’t come home for dinner, citing that she had to go to the company.
After Xu Mo caused a scene in front of everyone, everyone was unhappy, and the house fell into silence.
At the dinner table just now, Xie Bingyan and Xu Deming sat with dark faces, not speaking, harboring thick anger in their hearts.
Xu Junzhe didn’t have any major issues, just got punched in the nose bridge, got it bandaged slightly, and then went home.
Xu Xuehui also had no appetite, she took a few bites and then excused herself to her room to rest.
“So, I’m the bastard? Is that right?”
“You’re absolutely right! I’m the bastard or even a beast! Because my parents were originally like that! Since they were, naturally, so am I!”
No one expected Xu Mo to curse like this. This sentence shocked both his sisters.
Not only Xu Mo’s reaction but also Xie Bingyan’s desire to scold him.
Although Xie Bingyan stopped herself from scolding, didn’t say it out loud, Xu Xuehui and the others knew clearly that this was what she wanted to say deep down.
Yet Xu Mo could calmly articulate what she wanted to say.
How desperate must he be?
Xu Xuehui found it hard to imagine!
Presumably, after her elder sister couldn’t bear it anymore when she got back, she sent Xu Mo’s diary from five years ago to her.
That day happened to be Children’s Day!
“Her eyes should be big, her complexion fair, her hair very smooth, long enough to reach her waist. Sometimes, my mother likes to wear dresses, sometimes she prefers T-shirts, but no matter what she wears, she always looks very beautiful!”
“Mother, she would have her specialties, she’d make dumplings, simmer noodles, stir up some home-cooked dishes, just like Teacher Zhao! If we didn’t feel like eating, she’d gently remind us to eat!”
“My mother, whether alive or not, I think they should still be in this world! They’ve turned into a star in the sky, whenever I lift my head, I can see them!”
“Kind, gentle, and always smiling, I can almost see her face!”
“I should have a father too! His back would be as broad as a mountain, as solid as a mountain. When he stands there, he’s like a giant, always ready to shield us from the wind and rain!”
“My father, he should be like that father with one arm and one leg, his strength as if he could shoulder the entire world, lift the whole earth!”
“But where are you? I can’t find you anymore! I’ve lost sight of you!”
“Tang Lei talks about his parents, says he might have seen them once when he was little, that someone secretly came to the orphanage to see him! He seems to have memories of that!”
“But I haven’t, I haven’t seen them, I don’t know what they look like? Are they doing well? Are they healthy? Are they happy? If I could see them once, even just once, I’d be willing to die!”
“I haven’t seen them! But I can imagine them! Among us four, Banzhuang is actually the luckiest. When her parents passed away, she was already quite grown up. She still has their photos, tucked away in her drawer. Sometimes, when she can’t sleep at night, she takes them out to look at!”
“She hides under her blanket, secretly turns on the light, and quietly looks at them!”
“Sometimes, I hear Banzhuang crying! She misses her parents! And today, I miss you too! Mom, Dad, are you both okay? Are you both watching over me from heaven?”
“I’m crazily longing for you! Insanely longing!”
“I should have older brothers or sisters too! If I had sisters, each of them would surely be very beautiful, gentle, and kind!”
“My sisters would be like my mother, with big eyes, tall figures, fair complexions, and long hair!”
“They should all be the best sisters in the world. Sometimes, like Teacher Zhao, they would buy us toys, snacks, and clothes…”
“If I had sisters, then I could draw their portraits!”
“Tang Lei and I lay on the grass chatting for a long, long time until evening, only then did we leave the school and return to the orphanage!”
“Mom, Dad, brothers, sisters, can you see? I’m growing taller and stronger!”
“I miss you, miss you every day, going crazy wanting to see you, even if it’s just a glimpse, just to know what you look like!”
“Mom, Dad, brothers, sisters, rest assured, Tang Lei and I have sworn to study hard, to grow up to be useful people!”
“I don’t know where you are! Or whether you’re still alive? But maybe one day, just maybe, if I see you, I’ll go crazy telling you how much I love you, always love you!”
“Sniff…”
Xu Xuehui couldn’t hold back her tears, hastily biting onto the blanket to stifle her sobs, preventing her sound from spreading.
Tears gushed out crazily from her eyes, blurring her vision. They flowed like a unleashed flood, utterly unstoppable.
Xu Xuehui didn’t know what expression Xu Wanting would have when she saw this diary.
But she could guess, Xu Wanting would definitely not feel good.
At that time, Xu Mo hadn’t been found yet, he was still wandering in the orphanage, studying outside.
Xu Xuehui, who prided herself on her wide-ranging knowledge and talents, found it difficult to comprehend the longing of an orphan for parents, for family!
Everything he did was based on this!
Reflecting on the past four years and combining them with this diary, Xu Xuehui finally understood everything.
Her tears couldn’t be stopped, already leaving marks on her delicate face.
In the Xu family, he had once been as humble as dust, desperately trying to please everyone, especially his elder sister. He idolized her, considering her his pride and role model.
He once idolized his elder sister madly.
And to her, Xu Xuehui, it was almost the same. His former fervor made them both unbearable and incomprehensible.
He would secretly sneak into Mom’s room to sleep, just to feel even a hint of their parents’ presence.
He had once yearned so desperately for that slightest trace of their presence.
But now, it’s gone!
Now there’s nothing!
No one is looking forward to him coming home, no one is anticipating seeing him!
“I’m the bastard? Is that right?”
“You’re absolutely right! I’m the bastard or even a beast! Because my parents were originally like that! Since they were, naturally, so am I!”
“Sob…”
Xu Xuehui couldn’t hold back anymore, completely unable to suppress it!
Now she deeply felt that despair!
They, they were the culprits!