Chapter 21 – 021

“Ah! Ah—” Gu Xian let out a shrill scream, but he didn’t have the strength to push away the person beside him. He could only glare fiercely. “I already told you all to stop f*cking touching me!”

Li Yuqiu raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. Watching Gu Xian collapse on the sofa, looking half-paralyzed, he hesitated for a moment but couldn’t hold back.

“You really did it with Xie Yunjing?”

“Do it, my ass!” Gu Xian furiously threw a cushion at him. “This is f*cking muscle strain! That bastard Xie Yunjing said he was teaching me to work out. I think he was just trying to murder me!”

The cushion landed softly in Li Yuqiu’s arms without even bouncing. Li Yuqiu casually hugged it. “Out of nowhere, why did you suddenly decide to start working out?”

There was no way Gu Xian was going to admit to the embarrassing incident of being pinned down by a brat and unable to get back up. “That bastard Xie Yunjing has abs. Why the hell can’t I?”

What’s even more annoying was that as long as he didn’t start working out, Xie Yunjing wouldn’t stop discriminating against the layer of fat on his stomach! If it wasn’t a sudden pinch or two, it was a sarcastic remark.

Sheng Yi, who had followed them into the private room to join the fun, was peeling an orange at this point. As he ate, he teased with great interest, “Oh, so you and Xie Yunjing have ‘bared it all’ to each other?”

“I want some too,” Gu Xian demanded imperiously.

Sheng Yi wasn’t annoyed and casually broke off a segment of the orange, holding it up to Gu Xian’s mouth.

Gu Xian, acting like a lord, opened his mouth to take it, then complained, “Cut it out. Haven’t you ever lived in a school dorm? I’m sharing a place with Xie Yunjing now. So what if I know he has abs?”

“But that doesn’t mean you have to ask him to be your fitness coach,” Han Rui said, engrossed in his phone with his eyes glued to the screen. His entire demeanor radiated the sour smell of someone in love. “Given your relationship with Xie Yunjing, asking him to be your fitness coach is like throwing a sheep into a tiger’s den, practically a death wish.”

“Do you think I wanted this?!” Gu Xian caught another orange segment Sheng Yi handed over. “That wastrel Xie Yunjing set up a whole gym at home. If I go out and pay for a fitness club membership, wouldn’t that make me a sucker?”

Han Rui finally deigned to look up, giving Gu Xian a slightly odd glance. “Even if the gym Xie Yunjing built goes unused, it’s his money being wasted. Why do you care?”

“Wastefulness is shameful, even if it’s Xie Yunjing! Besides, do I look like an idiot who’d spend money when I don’t have to?” Gu Xian exclaimed, slapping the sofa in agitation, only to immediately cry out in misery. “Crap, crap, crap! It hurts like hell!”

Han Rui gave him a look that was hard to describe. “…As long as you’re happy.”

After saying that, he lowered his head again, continuing to chat with someone on his phone.

Sheng Yi, having finished the orange, clapped his hands and stood up. “I’ll go find someone to give you a massage.”

Li Yuqiu, unable to resist, poked Gu Xian’s thigh. Hearing the sharp “hiss” in response, he curiously remarked, “You’re this banged up, yet you still managed to come to the bar on your own. Truly a shining example of perseverance despite physical limitations!”

“Scram.” Gu Xian rolled his eyes at him, refusing to admit that he had actually come out to avoid tonight’s planned workout session.

Sheng Yi quickly returned, bringing someone along with him.

Li Yuqiu looked at the young girl and asked skeptically, “A young girl? Can she even do this? Does she have enough strength?”

“Enough already.” Sheng Yi, annoyed by his chatter, kicked him and gestured for him to move aside. “We need someone with a lighter touch. If we get someone too strong, they’ll end up pressing Gu Xian to death.”

They cleared out the middle of the sofa, and Gu Xian painstakingly shifted himself into position. As soon as the massage girl started, he grimaced and jerked in pain, baring his teeth. Startled, the girl immediately stopped, looking nervously at Sheng Yi, unsure if she should continue.

Since it wasn’t him suffering, Sheng Yi wasn’t in a position to decide. He turned to Gu Xian for confirmation.

Gu Xian took a deep breath, stuffed a cushion under his head, and gripped it tightly. “Go ahead, go ahead. I’ll tough it out.”

Sheng Yi peeled another orange and, watching Gu Xian’s death grip on the cushion as if he was about to tear it apart, commented, “Not to be rude, but your physical condition is really terrible. A little exercise and you’re completely wrecked. If it weren’t for the fact that you don’t have any injuries, I’d think Xie Yunjing was abusing you and be ready to call the cops.”

He offered an orange segment. “Want some?”

Want your damn orange!

Gu Xian glared at him fiercely. Couldn’t he see he was busy gritting his teeth to avoid scaring the poor massage girl?

Sheng Yi was deliberately teasing him. Seeing Gu Xian’s glare, he wasn’t intimidated, in fact, he laughed even more. “Don’t bother glaring at me; no matter how hard you glare, your eyes won’t kill anyone. Take a good look at yourself right now that can’t lift a shoulder, and can’t carry anything with your hands. You used to lead us in fights, and now look at you! Honestly, I don’t think Xie Yunjing being your fitness coach is a bad thing. With the state you’re in, if it weren’t him, you’d probably have weaseled out of it on the very first day.”

Gu Xian rolled his eyes instead, scoffing internally.

Who said he couldn’t bail just because it was Xie Yunjing? Didn’t he skip out today?

As Sheng Yi continued, he sighed a little. “A few years ago, we tried to get you to exercise more, but you wouldn’t budge. Guess arguing with your arch-enemy was more fun, huh?”

Gu Xian couldn’t answer and didn’t want to, so he simply closed his eyes and ignored him.

However, the sudden sound of his phone ringing forced him to open his eyes again.

He picked up the phone, glanced at the screen, and immediately turned it off, flipping it over and tossing it aside.

Sheng Yi raised his eyebrow sharply. “Xie Yunjing checking up on you?”

He looked at Gu Xian thoughtfully. “Don’t tell me you came here to take refuge?”

Gu Xian couldn’t hold back anymore, suppressing the groan rising in his throat, and snapped at him fiercely, “Can you f*cking shut up for once and eat your damn orange!”

“Oh-ho?” Sheng Yi gave a look of sudden understanding.

Gu Xian was nearly frantic. “’Oh-ho’ your damn head! If you say one more—ah!!!—”

Just as he was getting used to the pressure, the massage suddenly shifted positions, triggering an intense wave of soreness that made him scream in pain on the spot.

The overly loud scream naturally startled the young girl, leaving her hands frozen mid-air, looking quite at a loss.

Gu Xian’s eyes were teary from the pain. He turned his head, intending to reassure the girl that it was fine, but his gaze froze the moment it swept over the doorway of the private room.

Sheng Yi and the others followed his line of sight, and they too froze, leaving the atmosphere in the room utterly tense and stagnant.

The waiter who had opened the door stood nervously at the entrance. Behind him, Xie Yunjing patted his shoulder, signaling that he could leave. The waiter quickly fled as if escaping a disaster.

Xie Yunjing didn’t step inside. Instead, he leaned casually against the doorframe, arms crossed. His gaze lingered on Gu Xian’s tear-streaked face, which looked as if he’d been thoroughly tormented, then shifted to the massage girl sitting beside him. Finally, he smirked mockingly and said, “You sure know how to enjoy yourself.”

“Wow—”

Sheng Yi had an expression of pure delight, the kind that screamed, “Oh wow, caught in the act!“

Gu Xian could only curse the fact that he didn’t have the strength to slap him right now.

Even though he felt a bit guilty about skipping tonight’s workout session, on the surface, Gu Xian still managed to maintain his composure in front of Xie Yunjing. “How’d you trick someone into opening the door for you?”

Sheng Yi’s bar operated with strict rules. He knew that without the private room owner’s permission, the waitstaff would never casually bring someone in.

“What do you mean ‘trick’?”

Gu Xian vaguely sensed that something was wrong and tried to stop him, but it was already too late.

Xie Yunjing pulled a small red booklet out of his pocket and opened it for everyone in the room to see. “Did you forget? The two of us have this.”

Author’s Note:

Who keeps their marriage certificate on them all the time? (tactical lean-back.jpg)

Xiao Xie: Foolish wives are the easiest to trick. ^q^

Xiao Gu: What did you just say??? (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻