Rather than exploring, it felt more like a confirmation, to the point where they were encroaching on each other’s breaths until the oxygen ran out.

Meng Fu Yuan noticed Chen Qing Wu’s palm pressing weakly against his chest, gently pushing him away. He finally stopped and held her tightly against his chest, his hand pressing on her back.

His heart was still racing and wouldn’t calm down for a long time.

No one spoke, and the only sound in the space was the faint hum of the computer host in standby mode.

Suddenly, he felt a warm, wet spot on his shoulder.

Meng Fu Yuan was startled.

He immediately lowered his head to lift Chen Qing Wu’s forehead, wanting her to raise her head, but she shook her head and buried her face even deeper.

Tears soaked through the fabric, her skin feeling like it had been scalded.

Meng Fu Yuan was at a loss, hesitating for a moment before finally cupping her chin and gently but firmly lifting her face.

Her eyes were red and misty with tears, a sorrowful expression that made his heart clench.

“What’s wrong, Qing Wu?” Meng Fu Yuan’s breathing became labored.

“I’m sorry… Maybe I shouldn’t have kissed you…” She looked at him and blinked, a tear falling onto his finger. “I’m so scared. I want every step I take to be well thought out because once I’m with you, it means…”

“Betraying everyone.”

The weight of those words, spoken by Meng Fu Yuan, made Chen Qing Wu’s eyelashes tremble. “I’m so cowardly; I’m not ready for this. But just now, I seemed unable to control myself with reason… not to kiss you.”

Meng Fu Yuan held the back of her head, wiping away the tears from the corners of her eyes with his thumb, and asked softly, “Then do you like me?”

This action might have been somewhat futile because her tears kept flowing.

“Would you kiss someone you don’t like?”

“No.”

“I wouldn’t either.”

Meng Fu Yuan let out a long breath. “Then that’s enough, Qing Wu.”

She had kissed him first.

She had said she liked him.

Chen Qing Wu looked at him, as if his reaction was not what she had expected.

He lowered his head, his voice deep. “From the moment I decided to pursue you, I thought thoroughly about what we would face. You’re not cowardly, Qing Wu. You’re far braver and more honest than you think.”

He knew that at the beginning, she might have been curious about this unusual and stimulating game, which was why she didn’t reject his advances.

But when she truly got involved, she didn’t treat it like a game at all. Every step she took gave clear feedback, never making him feel uncertain.

And now, at this critical point, reality was pressing down on them with great force.

In their camp, it was just the two of them.

He had observed and scrutinised for many years, already prepared for the possibility of breaking off with everyone.

And from the day Qing Wu revealed his feelings to now, it had only been less than six months, so it was completely normal for her not to have the same level of determination.

Caught between the two families, she would inevitably bear more pressure than he did. He understood the personalities of the parents from both families better than anyone.

Her fear indicated that she had already considered the worst-case scenario.

How could he blame her for not being resolute enough?

“Don’t cry, Qing Wu…” Meng Fu Yuan kept wiping her tears, making her look up and meet his gaze. After a long silence, he ignored the dull pain in his heart and spoke hoarsely, “Do you need more time to think it over slowly?”

All the emotions were temporarily clogged in her chest. Chen Qing Wu opened her mouth but didn’t know what the right reaction was.

“It’s okay. Just be honest with me, do you need to calm down and make a decision?”

Chen Qing Wu hesitated and nodded.

“Then I’ll wait for you to think it through.” Meng Fu Yuan’s breath was close to her cheek, his voice containing a kind of inclusive calmness. “But let me tell you in advance, I’ve done everything I can for you. So during the time you’re considering, I won’t come to you again. I’ll wait for you to come to me. And once you come, I’ll automatically assume you’ve thought it through and decided to face the worst with me.”

Chen Qing Wu was speechless.

How could there be someone like Meng Fu Yuan in this world, someone with the tolerance and assertiveness of a superior but without any arrogance or coercion?

With him, weakness was allowed, reckless impulse was allowed, and even changing her mind was allowed.

She was allowed to exist in all her facets as Chen Qing Wu, not just as the obedient and sensible Chen Qing Wu who compromised.

“One more thing,” Meng Fu Yuan added solemnly, “I’ll only wait for one or two months. I don’t want this matter to drag on indefinitely. Today is December 26th. By February 26th, if you still haven’t come to me, I’ll block all your contact information. From then on, our interactions will be limited to social exchanges between our families. Can you accept that?”

Tears welled up again, and Chen Qing Wu’s voice was hoarse. “Of course… that’s only fair to you.”

Meng Fu Yuan closed his eyes and let out a heavy breath.

For a moment, neither of them spoke.

Her cheeks felt tight, slightly stinging, and her eyes had a similar feeling of soreness, just like the pain in her heart.

Meng Fu Yuan spoke again, his voice hoarse and rough. “Are you hungry? Let’s eat something, and I’ll take you back.”

“Okay.”

Chen Qing Wu got down from the table, turned to pick up the bouquet of roses wrapped in black paper, and instinctively held it tightly.

Just as she was about to turn around, Meng Fu Yuan suddenly reached out from behind and hugged her tightly.

His head lowered, his face buried in her neck.

His breath touched her skin, a burning sensation. This embrace from behind seemed to reveal all his vulnerabilities.

He handed all the power of life and death to her.

Her heart felt like it was placed in ice and snow. Chen Qing Wu stopped moving, wishing time would stop as well so she wouldn’t have to make a choice.

Finally, Meng Fu Yuan let go.

She saw him reach for his glasses on the table.

A moment later, the voice from behind was absolutely calm, “Let’s go.”

Chen Qing Wu held the flowers and mechanically walked out.

At the door, she glanced at Meng Fu Yuan’s face, which was calm to the extreme, with no room for prying emotions.

She had no impression of how that meal ended.

After leaving the restaurant, she stood by the roadside, waiting for Meng Fu Yuan to fetch the car from the parking lot.

The air was biting, the wind brushing her cheeks like a sharp blade.

She took out a cigarette box from her pocket but couldn’t find a lighter, probably because she had forgotten to bring it when she went out.

Sighing dejectedly, she had to give up.

At this moment, the car lights flashed.

Looking up, Meng Fu Yuan’s car approached and stopped in front of her.

The return journey was silent.

The car stereo continued to play the playlist, the volume so low it blended with the dull noise of the wind outside the window.

Chen Qing Wu had heard this song before.

“He also wants to hide with you in a place without light, sharing ugliness, or overturned beer.”

“He should never have been born, or should have been sacrificed.”

“You are the person he loves the most in the world he hates the most.” (*Note)

The car arrived at the entrance of the studio.

The previous conversation was so significant that now, all they could say was “Rest early” and “Goodnight.”

Chen Qing Wu held the roses in one hand and opened the car door with the other.

As she got out, she paused slightly and slammed the car door.

She glanced at the driver’s seat one last time, then turned and walked toward the entrance.

Just as she stepped onto the stairs, she heard, “Qing Wu.”

She immediately stopped and turned around.

Meng Fu Yuan got out of the car, one hand in his pocket, walking toward her.

In the cold wind, his figure seemed exceptionally solitary.

He stopped in front of her, took her hand, gently opened her fingers, and placed something in her palm.

Without another word, he turned and left.

Chen Qing Wu lowered her eyes.

It was a silver lighter.

She instinctively clenched it, as if trying to hold onto the lingering warmth.

The corners pressed into her palm, causing a slight pain.