Never Seen You Before

Humans are all about that true fragrance moment, and tsukumogami aren’t any different.

Even before the spicy bullfrogs hit the table, their bold aroma had already taken over the dining hall. Everyone couldn’t help but take a whiff.

At first, it felt a bit too much—kinda spicy. But then it smelled good, and they couldn’t resist sniffing again.

Heads got all fuzzy.

So weird.

When the dish was finally served, that bright red broth made everyone’s heart skip a beat.

That many chili peppers?

Is the Saniwa trying to spicy us all to death in one meal?

But their poison resistance was top-notch…

If that was his plan, he’d be disappointed.

Besides the fiery “soup,” there were also some golden, crispy-looking things and a fizzy black liquid on the table.

The Saniwa called them family buckets and otaku happy water.

The family buckets probably had fried chicken nuggets. The tsukumogami took the name literally—like the chicken’s whole family got fried in there.

That seemed normal enough.

But why were there red bean pies and mashed potatoes in the chicken’s “family”?

Oh, and some family buckets even had egg tarts.

Guess chicken families have their differences too.

—

Lin Ge washed his hands and saw the tsukumogami staring at the fried chicken and spicy bullfrogs, frozen. They exchanged looks, faces full of dread, not one touching their chopsticks.

“Why aren’t you eating?”

Plopping down in a random seat, Lin Ge was confused.

Clink.

The bowl tapped the table.

Eyes fixed straight ahead, Yamanbakiri Kunihiro rinsed his bowl and chopsticks with hot water.

He kinda got why his comrades were hesitating.

Should I take one for the team?

It was the Lord’s first time cooking. If no one ate, wouldn’t he feel bad?

Like he’d said before… it probably wouldn’t kill them…

Lin Ge didn’t think much of it, just figured the tsukumogami were being polite, waiting for everyone to gather. He felt kinda touched.

What a great team vibe!

Feeling the moment, he whipped out his phone and snapped a group pic.

From his last life’s work experience and Saniwa forum posts, you never knew when the higher-ups might spring a surprise inspection and ask for a pointless Honmaru culture PPT. These shots were perfect material!

Thinking they’d dig in once he started, Lin Ge didn’t push. He thanked Yamanbakiri Kunihiro for rinsing the dishes, then dove into the spicy bullfrogs he’d been craving for days.

Soft, tender, and savory—just like he remembered. His cooking skills hadn’t slipped.

Gotta make this for Strawberry Shortcake sometime.

There’s an old saying: to win a guy’s heart, you gotta win his stomach!

Not sure if Strawberry Shortcake would eat this, though…

He didn’t seem like a spice guy.

Maybe I should sign up for a dessert class.

Lin Ge mulled it over seriously.

Bet Gojo Satoru would love that.

—

After last night’s reaction from Tsurumaru Kuninaga, knowing the tsukumogami had never tried this and might not handle spice well, Lin Ge had used only two-thirds the usual amount of chili.

Seeing him dig in, looking like he’d tasted heaven, Yamanbakiri Kunihiro pursed his lips.

That good?

But then he remembered Lin Ge chomping on a spirit-tainted arm and scarfing Retrograde Troops like candy, all blissed out. He wasn’t so sure what this tasted like.

He hesitated.

Whatever.

…I’ll eat.

Under his comrades’ watchful eyes, Yamanbakiri Kunihiro closed his eyes, swallowing a bite like he was facing death.

Chew, chew, chew.

His eyes popped open in shock.

Chew, chew, chew…

He could hardly believe the flavor in his mouth.

Kinda spicy… but…

So freaking good!

The chicken nuggets were amazing too.

And this happy water.

The Lord really nails descriptions…

He sipped the iced cola, tiny bubbles dancing in his mouth.

Yamanbakiri Kunihiro declared this the best meal of his blade life.

The other blades, sneaking peeks: “…”

Yamanbakiri’s a real champ.

—

Shivering, Tsurumaru Kuninaga hugged his arms, kinda impressed with Yamanbakiri.

Going all out for the Saniwa like that?

“When did Yamanbakiri get so good at acting…?”

Lowering his voice, Tsurumaru Kuninaga hoped for some backup from Mikazuki Munechika.

Before he could finish, he saw Mikazuki Munechika calmly pick up a small piece of bullfrog with his chopsticks, pop it in his mouth, and chew.

Tsurumaru Kuninaga: “You…”

Done for!

See? Told ya—Mikazuki sleeps too much and dumbs himself down!

Before he could react, Mikazuki Munechika spoke.

“It’s pretty good.”

“Try some, Tsurumaru.”

—

In the end, every dish was wiped clean.

Lin Ge half-suspected he’d passed his glutton powers to the tsukumogami.

After eating, as his colleagues scrambled to wash dishes, Lin Ge cleared his throat, putting on his serious “big news” face. He unveiled a dishwasher he’d just ordered from the shop.

“Use this.”

The dishwasher was half a person tall, supposedly a Time Government upgraded model—super smart, powered by spiritual energy.

It had drying and sanitizing functions, way fancier than any Lin Ge had used in his past life.

Seeing the tsukumogami’s attention locked on the machine, Lin Ge wiped the red oil off his fingers and called out to Hakusan Yoshimitsu, who was about to leave. “Let me do a Hand Treatment for you.”

He pointed at the messy bandage bow on Hakusan Yoshimitsu’s waist. “Doesn’t it hurt?”

He’d meant to ask Yamanbakiri how to do it, but relying on him too much felt wrong—like it’d crank up Yamanbakiri’s dad vibes. So, he’d dug around the Saniwa forum’s Q&A page himself.

The forum’s a goldmine!

Hakusan Yoshimitsu: “…”

After a stunned moment, he nodded. “Okay.”

One word out, he stared at Lin Ge blankly, adding flatly, “…Lord, thank you.”

No hint of emotion in his voice.

Lin Ge stifled a laugh.

No wonder the forum nicknamed this guy “Blade AI”.

—

Hand Treatment Room.

Lin Ge eyed the small wooden stick in his hand suspiciously.

Light as a feather.

Tiny, with a white fluffy ball at the tip.

This thing, dipped in powder and tapped on a blade, heals wounds?

He tested it, dipping the stick in the box’s glittery powder and tapping it on the sword laid out.

Waiting two, three seconds.

Great. Nothing changed except the blade looking shinier.

Awkward.

Tugging a weak smile, ready to play it off, he heard Hakusan Yoshimitsu speak.

“…For Hand Treatment, you need to channel a bit of spiritual energy.”

His true form shuddered at the mishandling, eyes betraying a flicker of distress.

Closing his ice-blue eyes to hide his unease, Hakusan Yoshimitsu dipped his head, biting his lip.

“Oh, like that…”

Lin Ge was no stranger to spiritual energy. He was a quick learner. Hearing the right method, he fiddled a bit, and soon the stick glowed gold.

Lin Ge: “…”

Whoa!

So cool!

Feels like I could transform into a magical boy any second!

—

As the stick tapped gently, nourished by spiritual energy, Hakusan Yoshimitsu’s waist wound healed visibly fast. His true form gleamed like it’d been polished, and cherry blossoms even started floating around.

Lin Ge rubbed his eyes.

Huh?

Cherry blossoms?

What’s this effect now?

He glanced at Hakusan Yoshimitsu.

The guy’s delicate face was bright red, blossoms cascading from his head.

Petals hit the floor, bursting into countless golden specks.

Catching Lin Ge’s curious stare—like he’d spotted a rare creature—Hakusan Yoshimitsu forced out an explanation. “…Lord, it’s Sakura Fubuki. Means I’m in great shape.”

“It’ll stop soon.”

“Oh.”

Lin Ge clicked his tongue.

“Then keep floating for now.”

This setup.

The Time Government’s got some girly vibes.

—

After fixing Hakusan Yoshimitsu’s battle wounds, Lin Ge joined his colleagues for games that evening. After snagging a big dragon, he “casually” mentioned he’d be heading out tomorrow.

Two days of “online dating,” and he was off to meet IRL!

What should I treat Strawberry Shortcake to?

Something fancy might seem too obvious, right?

Who picks a revolving restaurant for a bro hangout?

Lin Ge had figured it out—Gojo Satoru was easy to please.

Fancy food? He’d eat it. Cheap stuff? Loved it too. Not picky at all.

Just like me, heh.

Secretly hyping himself up, Lin Ge was in such a great mood he felt like he’d sprout Sakura Fubuki too.

“Whoa, so sudden.”

Tearing his eyes from the screen, Kashuu Kiyomitsu looked up, confused.

Wasn’t the dispatch in a week?

He’d been planning to bug the Saniwa to carry him to a higher rank these next few days.

He was even daydreaming about the next spicy bullfrog meal.

Watching Lin Ge cook in the kitchen today, he’d memorized every step!

And those chicken families the Saniwa brought…

Kashuu Kiyomitsu’s gaze drifted.

The happy water was so good—those fizzy bubbles in his mouth felt so new.

Heh, happiness all in my tummy.

The Saniwa was a pro at eating, drinking, and fun.

But learning Lin Ge was “business tripping” tomorrow after the teleport array recharged, he got super bummed.

In those two seconds of spacing out, his screen’s new Hellfire Jiji King outfit—earned with a 1—got ganked by three dudes popping out of the enemy jungle.

Chained by their combo, he had no chance.

After the ambush, one enemy typed in all-chat: 「Monkey a bot? So dumb.」

Right as it posted, Lin Ge’s champion swooped in like a god, 1v3, avenging Kashuu Kiyomitsu with epic kill sounds.

Revenge served hot.

He’d been farming lanes and heads since the start, racking up crazy gold, playing a high-burst hero. For a moment, he was unstoppable.

While mowing down enemies, Lin Ge clapped back in chat: 「Barky lil bro, so cute.」

Kashuu Kiyomitsu: “…”

So satisfying. So touching.

But it made him sadder.

What was he gonna do these days while the Saniwa was gone?

Keep getting farmed like a bot with Hirano Toushirou?

Yamanbakiri had some skill, but not much.

“…I’ll be back in three days tops. Got my return scroll ready, so don’t worry.”

Lin Ge gave his colleagues a heads-up.

He was an adult!

Off to chase love!

Work was work, life was life.

Yamanbakiri Kunihiro looked worried, tossing Lin Ge a heal. “You sure you don’t need me along?”

That world was dangerous.

He remembered the grudge spirit Tsurumaru Kuninaga had sliced up.

Lin Ge waved it off casually. “Nah, I’m good.”

One comes, I eat one. Two come, I eat a pair!

—

Next Day.

“Stay safe. If you hit trouble you can’t handle, the talisman can buy you time. You have to use the return scroll right away…” Yamanbakiri Kunihiro rambled, still uneasy.

As a tsukumogami, he had to respect the Saniwa’s wishes.

If Lin Ge didn’t want him tagging along, he had to follow the rules.

“I know, I know.”

Lin Ge half-laughed, half-cried at the fussing.

He’d checked the blade records—Yamanbakiri had only been around for a year and a half.

No clue where all this “dad energy” came from.

“How long till you’re back?”

Kashuu Kiyomitsu asked.

He sulkily kicked a pebble, over and over.

Lin Ge sighed. “Didn’t I say yesterday? Three days max.”

“Plus, even if I’m away, you can message me to game…”

This one was younger—nine months.

He knew why Kashuu Kiyomitsu was so “clingy.”

Don’t let their tiny looks fool you—short blades like Hirano Toushirou were way more mature than Kashuu Kiyomitsu.

Small but mighty!

Lin Ge thought Kashuu Kiyomitsu was like a grade-schooler.

Loved dressing up, glued to games, eyes red from getting flamed.

Only difference from kids? He didn’t curse back—just took it. And his game skills sucked.

Eyes lighting up, Kashuu Kiyomitsu nodded hard, then got shy, mumbling, “I’ll try not to bug you…”

“Want me to bring anything back?” Lin Ge asked.

The shop had barely any cooked food—no family buckets or sodas.

Yamanbakiri Kunihiro shook his head. “Just come back safe.”

Kashuu Kiyomitsu: “Red bean pies…”

They answered at once, total opposites.

Kashuu Kiyomitsu: “…”

Yamanbakiri, gotta be that extra?

Puffing his cheeks like a pufferfish, he huffed, “Same here.”

Lin Ge: “…Haha.”

He could only laugh awkwardly.

—

Setting the teleport coordinates, Lin Ge turned down the tsukumogami’s help, brimming with confidence as he took charge.

63:07:12…

He fumbled with the settings, all rookie-like.

Plenty of this later!

Gotta get used to it now!

Five minutes later, he regretted it.

A golden beam shot from the sky to the ground, epic effects blazing. When Lin Ge opened his eyes, he was in free fall.

Way up—about three stories high—plummeting fast, hair whipping back from gravity. Luckily, a tree cushioned him, or he’d have broken an arm or leg for sure.

…Good thing it wasn’t from the sky’s ceiling.

Ten trees wouldn’t save him from turning into mush!

Crashing through dense branches, he hit the ground with a thud, looking like a mess. Squinting up, the sunlight stung his eyes.

Brushing off dirt, spitting out leaves with a pfft pfft, Lin Ge staggered to his feet, unsure where he’d landed.

Tokyo? Or back in Miyagi?

He tried checking his phone’s GPS, but it coldly flashed “No Signal.”

Lin Ge scratched his head.

Did I teleport to some backwoods jungle?

Oh well, my teleport, my walk.

Lifting a foot, his nose twitched suddenly. He caught a sweet scent.

Kinda like that trendy dish, blueberry yam.

Scanning around, he wondered if a Cursed Spirit, Jujutsu Sorcerer, or Retrograde Troops was nearby.

Nothing. Empty.

Smelled wrong?

No way…

He trusted his dog-like nose.

A tap hit his shoulder from behind.

Lin Ge jumped, heart nearly leaping out, and spun around to see a guy with medium-length blue hair.

All smiles.

His hair was tied in three braids, skin pale like he’d been dead for days.

…Kinda like Lin Ge’s own skin when he first became a hungry ghost. Super unhealthy, not alive-looking.

Plus, jagged stitch scars crisscrossed his face, ruining what could’ve been decent features.

Lin Ge instinctively stepped back.

This blue-haired dude’s up to no good.

Even if he smelled a bit like blueberry yam…

“Hey, you…”

Under Lin Ge’s stare, the guy’s lips curled into a downright gleeful grin. “Never seen you before. New Cursed Spirit?”

Lin Ge’s brain nearly fried. “Huh?”