Chapter 146

Pei Jian descended from the mountain.

At the end of the year, with officials making their rounds, the front of the Pei residence was bustling with non-stop carriages and horses. Even matchmakers came in greater numbers than usual.

Pei Jian refused to see any of them.

This only enhanced his reputation for integrity in the eyes of the Emperor.

On New Year’s Eve, the entire alley finally quieted down. As dusk approached, the afternoon snow had ceased, revealing a sky full of sparkling stars that reflected off the silvery ground, crunching underfoot.

It felt as if the whole world had left him behind. What is the most terrifying thing in the world?

In the past, Pei Jian would have thought failure was the most terrifying. Now, he knows loneliness is the scariest, especially the solitude after busyness; when the heart cannot find its home, quietness becomes torment. He recalled the look on Nianxi’s face when she said she wanted to celebrate his birthday, gazing at him intently, her shimmering eyes full of adoration. She had prepared such a grand surprise for him. Yet, it was ruined by a clumsy lie from Xu Wanxin.

And he, so blind and foolish, remained in the dark all along.

He was too arrogant. He overlooked that the malice of a woman can sometimes be more pervasive than a man’s. The words “I’m sorry” felt too light between him and Nianxi; no matter how he said them, they seemed insincere.

Actually, that day, he saw the tears in Nianxi’s eyes.

Since his rebirth, almost every time he saw her, she was smiling, full of joy; even when facing him, she smiled most of the time. But that day, at the gate of the Wen residence, he saw her tears. Although she tried hard to contain her sorrow, she couldn’t suppress herself, and he even saw her trembling slightly.

His hand hovered briefly in the air, longing to offer her support, but ultimately fell; he had no right to console her. The pain was sharp, as though a piece of him had been torn away; every wound she bore echoed back to him, magnified tenfold.

With the flickering light of the lantern in the desolate night, Pei Jian silently walked back.

The Crown Prince had often mentioned that he wanted to bestow a large mansion upon him, closer to the palace, but he had always declined. Wherever it was, it wasn’t home; wherever it was, she wasn’t there; what difference did size make?

“Cousin—” A figure slowly emerged From beside the stone lion.

She must have been waiting for a long time; her face was pale from the cold, yet it did not diminish her beauty, which was still frail and beautiful.

She softly called him, “Cousin, I’ve been waiting for you.”

She turned her head to signal the maid behind her, who handed her a food box, and then she gracefully walked up to Pei Jian. “Cousin, today is New Year’s Eve. Let Wan’er accompany you to see the year out, okay? I did wrong before, but now I know I was wrong. Look, this is the Da Nai cake I specially made, I remember when Aunt was here, she loved making this for you to eat.”

“I also brought wine. Shall we go inside?” Xu Wanxin waited here because Pei Jian had previously ordered that she was not to step into the Pei residence again. Although she was angry, it also happened to align with her wishes.

That time she was too hasty; seeing Wen Nianxi return to the residence with her cousin, she hurried over and revealed her scheme. Today, she decided to lay bare her feelings, believing that Pei Jian could not be so heartless on such a festive reunion occasion.

Pei Jian looked down at her, his long, thick eyelashes covering his eyes, his face devoid of any smile, exuding a disdainful coldness, “You want to go home with me?”

Xu Wanxin’s face turned red, like fine rouge dabbed on cream, strikingly beautiful. She looked up, her voice soft and lingering, filled with endless affection: “My feelings for you, cousin, have never changed. We are engaged. We should be husband and wife for life. There is no one else in my heart, only you. Cousin, please let me love you.” As she spoke, she reached out to hold Pei Jian’s hand, wanting to place it over her heart, her face flushing even more, “If you don’t believe me, listen, this heart beats only for you.”

Pei Jian took a step back, not allowing her to touch him.

Xu Wanxin’s face stiffened, and after a pause, she added, “I told your mother that I would be good to you for a lifetime. I will never forget those words.”

Pei Jian slowly curled his lips, his voice clear and cold, like jade striking a chime, “Is my mother very useful to you?”

Xu Wanxin’s smile froze at these words, and she trembled, “What are you saying?”

That year on his birthday, he was busy with official duties at the yamen, disappointing Nianxi’s heartfelt intentions. Xu Wanxin sent someone to invite him, saying she remembered an old item from his mother and wanted to hand it to him personally.

Pei Jian had no reason to doubt her. However, his official duties were inescapable, so he sent the servant back, stating he was busy.

Little did he expect that he himself would hand the sword that harmed his wife to Xu Wanxin, giving her an excuse to weave lies.

Pei Jian stared intently at Xu Wanxin’s face and asked, “What about that Mr. Xing?”

Xu Wanxin’s face lit up with joy, and she stepped closer, the distance between them now very close, “That was just to make you jealous, cousin.”

Her tone was full of disdain, the snow reflecting the madness in her eyes, “How could I like someone like that? I just wanted you to notice me. Cousin, for you, I am willing to do anything, as long as you see me, as long as you love me.”

No wonder, in her past life, she defied everyone’s opposition to marry that sickly man.

No wonder, just after her husband’s death, she knelt before him, tearfully begging for his protection.

No wonder, she said Nianxi was lonely, advising him to adopt a child for Nianxi.

Pei Shizhang, oh Pei Shizhang, you indeed are the number one fool in the world.

At this moment, Pei Jian felt a chill from head to toe, piercing his heart.

“How could I possibly like someone like you?” Pei Jian repeated Xu Wanxin’s words with a bland expression and a cold voice.

“Do you think you’re special? Had I known today, I wouldn’t have even spared you a shred of pity. Today, I clearly tell you, even if my mother were alive, I would not marry you, nor would I ever love you.”

His words were sharp and harsh, instantly piercing through Xu Wanxin’s smiling facade, causing her lips to droop inch by inch, finally settling between shock and hatred. Her eyes wide, her eyelashes trembling imperceptibly, she looked up at Pei Jian, and after a long while, she squeezed out the words: “Do you hate me so much?”

“Hate you? You’re not worthy.”

The things Xu Wanxin has done are so unforgivable that even dying ten times would not suffice. He hadn’t planned to deal with the Xu family so soon, but since someone couldn’t wait to jump out and seek death, then there was no need to wait any longer.

Xu Wanxin felt as if his words were slicing her, her heart aching as if she wanted to die, her chest so stifled she could hardly breathe. She almost gritted her teeth and said, “For the sake of a Wen Nianxi, you would disregard your own mother?”

Pei Jian looked at her twisted expression, feeling only disgust. At such a time, she still used his mother as an excuse: “When you go to the other side, you can ask my mother yourself.”

Xu Wanxin paused for a few breaths before she realized what he meant— he wanted her to die. The man she had loved since childhood told her to her face that he wanted her to die.

The pain in her heart reached its peak, yet there was a strange sense of relief. She stared at him and said word by word: “Pei Jian, don’t you regret this.”

However, the only response she received was his figure brushing past her, not looking back.