Chapter 84

Despite the stifling pain in his chest and the sense of his blood dripping, Pei Jian refused to show his weakness or wounds. “The Crown Prince advised His Majesty to send Duke Zhen back to the northern border yesterday. Having immersed himself in officialdom for many years, the Duke has also been active on many fronts. Gu Ci must have been preoccupied with these matters over the past few days. You… don’t need to worry.”

In the face of the tides of history, the strength of a single individual is negligible.

Nianxi realized she had been overly harsh on Pei Jian. Sincerely, she said, “Thank you.”

But those simple words were harder to bear than anything that had come before. His body, torn and battered by emotions, had grown almost numb, though his heart still ached. “Never thank me for him,” he said.

Nearly gritting his teeth, he finished his words one by one: “I’ve done all this, not a single bit of it for you.”

She paused in silence for a moment and responded, “It’s late. You should head back now.”

With that, she prepared to leave.

“There won’t be any trouble.” Looking at Nianxi’s low spirits, Pei Jian couldn’t resist trying to comfort her. “Don’t be afraid.”

Knowing well she had come to see him for Gu Ci’s sake and that she was using him, he still willingly let himself be used. Even if her words were full of daggers, at the tip of each blade, there was just a trace of honey that lingered. At least, at this moment, they were in the same place together, weren’t they?

Nianxi turned around, her almond-shaped eyes glistening with tears. Filled with hope, she asked, “He’ll be safe, won’t he?”

Pei Jian looked into those beautiful, glimmering eyes. Once, she had looked at him with the same expectation. “Next time, when you’re on leave, will you make time to be with me?”

He heard his voice echoing from afar, traversing the distance of past and present lifetimes, as he faced the same yet different Nianxi, answering: “Yes, everything you long for will come true as you wish.”

Then, he saw Nianxi gently smile, her expression filled with sweet happiness. Across the intertwining layers of time, she had always trusted him. The difference was that the Nianxi of the past would happily run up to him and embrace him fully. The Nianxi of the present would only stand at a safe distance and politely nod in acknowledgment.

The more unattainable Pei Jian found the present Nianxi, the deeper his heartbreak and guilt for the Nianxi of the past. In these days of reflection, he realized that his memories of her during the last few years were almost a blank slate. The only moments that lingered in his mind were the ones from the beginning.

What did she like? What did she hate? He discovered he was completely unaware.

Once, Pei Jian always believed that he was the one making sacrifices. After all, a man striving hard outside the home was to provide a more prosperous and abundant life for his wife and children. He always thought he was doing it for Nianxi. But sadly, that was not true. In the end, he was doing it for himself. The one who had always been making the effort was his neglected wife.

Pei Jian believed they would never part, but on that evening, in the dreary wind and rain, she was resolute in seeking a divorce from him. The once lively and charming eyes were now as lifeless as a stagnant pool. She told him, “Pei Jian, I don’t love you anymore.”

He couldn’t believe it, panicked and helpless. When the summons from the palace came, he hurriedly left, leaving her behind forever on that rainy day, never to return.

“I’m sorry.” Pei Jian lowered his gaze and said softly, not daring to meet those clear and beautiful eyes.

Nianxi was stunned, looking at him dazedly, and asked quietly, “For what?”

Pei Jian shook his head, his tone difficult, “For the past you and me.”

“I want to tell that lonely Nianxi that I have now experienced the taste of loneliness and desolation. I can empathize—it’s torment every single day.” As he spoke, he stepped out of the shadows and stood before Nianxi. His calm and distant face showed slightly reddened eyes. “Nianxi, I want to apologize for the person I used to be.”

He then handed her the earring box he had been clutching. Nianxi looked at him for a moment and then lowered her head to accept it.

Pei Jian hadn’t expected that she would actually accept it. For a moment, he felt overjoyed. This was the first time since the rebirth they had a calm conversation. Nianxi accepting his gift marked a good beginning.

As he was about to speak, Nianxi softly said, “It’s alright. I no longer dwell on the past and have let it go.”

“Thank you for the gift, but there’s no need for future ones.”

Pei Jian gazed at her, trying to find some trace of emotion on her beautiful face, but there was none. She truly seemed to have let go, her tone as calm and gentle as her words.

She had “let go,” but he was still trapped in place.

Facing Nianxi, Pei Jian felt a deep sense of powerlessness, like water slipping through his fingers—impossible to hold onto, impossible to keep. And yet, he was unwilling to let go, tormented repeatedly, caught in an emotional limbo. He would rather she hated him or resented him than completely moved on.

Nianxi’s words cut into his heart like knives, leaving it trembling. But now, Pei Jian didn’t even dare to say much for fear of annoying her.

Time would tell—after all, she had already accepted the earrings.

…

After Pei Jian left, Nianxi felt somewhat at ease and slept soundly that night.

The next morning, the autumn air was crisp and refreshing. It was as if even the shadows weighing on her heart had been blown away. Nianxi stepped out, feeling light and bright.

Cousin Mu saw her and smiled, “Didn’t you say you were too busy to come today?”

“Everything has been resolved.”

Last night, she had already met Pei Jian.

“Guess who I saw yesterday?”

These past few days, Nianxi hadn’t revealed the worries in her heart, so Wang Muyi had no idea. At this moment, she pulled Nianxi with great interest and said, “Jiang Yuan!”

“In the past, whenever we saw her, she would flaunt her family background, acting arrogant. Whenever she saw us, her nose would be up in the air, giving us sidelong glances.”

Wang Muyi chuckled twice and continued, “Times are different now. I don’t know who enlightened her, but yesterday I saw her walking with Han Gaojie, and she was being extremely cautious and considerate.”

“Indeed, it takes one villain to deal with another.”

Nianxi asked, “What about Princess Xinchang?”

“Naturally, the engagement was annulled. After what she did to Jiang Yuan, how could Marquis Xindu’s household swallow their anger? Originally, Jiang’s second son was to marry the princess, and he was destined to live his life as a wealthy idler. But since he’s one of the most outstanding young men in the Jiang family’s new generation, this incident gave him the perfect excuse to break free.”

Nianxi was silent for a moment. “I wonder if they regret it.”

Wang Muyi played with an ornament in her hands, replying nonchalantly, “What good would regret do? They made their choices, so they must bear the consequences.”

As the two were speaking, a maid entered the room. “Madam, a young boy is outside requesting some ‘sugar snow.’ The servants told him we don’t have any, but he insists on staying and refuses to leave.”

Nianxi and Wang Muyi went out to take a look.

Sure enough, at the door stood a four-five-year-old boy, standing upright with one hand behind his back, his face full of seriousness. Upon seeing the two of them, he asked in a deliberately deep voice, “Are you the proprietors?”

Having been married for over half a year, Wang Muyi had recently become fond of children, especially this little boy, who was adorably delicate and had an amusing air of mimicry, trying to act like an adult. “Which family’s young master might you be?” she asked.

Seeing Wang Muyi’s smiling face, the boy took several steps back. “If there’s no sugar snow, bring me another cold dessert. Stop stalling—hurry up and serve it!” Dressed in luxurious silks and with an imposing aura, it was evident that he came from a prestigious family.

Wang Muyi remained patient. “Who eats cold desserts in autumn? Besides, you’re so young—be careful not to upset your stomach by tonight.” Looking around, she asked, “Why are you all alone? Where are your attendants?”

The more she showed concern, the more impatient the boy became. “What business is it of yours? Just sell it to this master—I have money.”

Wang Muyi, not the gentlest of temperaments, found the boy less adorable after his repeated retorts.

Nianxi, who had been quietly observing from the side, finally spoke up, “Our shop only serves female customers, not male customers.”

The boy frowned and glanced around. Seeing that all the patrons were women, he lowered his head in thought before saying, “I’m just a child, not a man.”

Wang Muyi couldn’t help but laugh, “You’re quite adaptable. Weren’t you just calling yourself ‘master’ a moment ago?”

“They only told me that this shop has great drinks. How was I supposed to know that men aren’t allowed?” The boy puffed up his cheeks, clasped his hands behind his back, and paced back and forth a couple of times. Then, turning back around, his demeanor had completely changed.

“Madam, I got separated from my family and am very tired. Please have mercy and sell me a bowl of cold dessert.” His shift from arrogance to politeness made it impossible to dislike him.

Wang Muyi found such a clever child delightful and kindly invited him to sit in the main hall, ordering a warm drink to be served instead. Not long after, his family’s attendants arrived in a frantic rush to retrieve him.