This night was really awful.

Lumi got home, taking off her shoes while cursing, “What the hell!” She didn’t like men who were like flies, and she didn’t like running into Zhang Qing.

She threw her down jacket aside and sprawled out on the sofa.

She took out her phone and messaged her second uncle, “Are you going to the early market tomorrow to buy New Year’s goods?”

“Of course, I am. Why aren’t you asleep yet?  Aren’t you afraid of getting sick from staying up late? Don’t you want to sleep a little earlier?”

“I’m going to sleep, see you tomorrow!”

Lumi washed up and got into bed ready to sleep. She turned on the diffuser, then remembered that there wouldn’t be a next time with Tu Ming, and turned it off again. No next time, so what? I can’t afford it or something? She couldn’t sleep, so she was just scrolling through her phone to vent.  It was almost midnight, and Tu Ming hadn’t made a move. Lumi couldn’t tell whether she was competing with Tu Ming or with herself. She barely slept all night, tossing and turning. Her mind was in a mess, but nothing came out of it.

The next morning, when she opened her eyes, it was already bright. She dragged her second uncle to the early market.

Her second uncle was happy. It was the New Year, and his relatives and friends would gather at his house. In the car, he kept saying to Lumi, “Only a few families get together like this during the year.”

“Are all those old drunkards at your house just pretending to be people?” Lumi teased him, “Your house is the liveliest in the whole neighborhood, full of birds and people.”

“That’s different. I need to buy more meat, only do this once or twice a year.”

“Buy as much as you want, the car won’t fit it all.”

Lumi glanced at her second uncle, “What new words have your birds learned?”

“Lumi’er.” Her second uncle showed off. He sent her a voice message, the first word was “Lumi’er,” the bird had learned it. When his family wasn’t around, her second uncle would turn to Lumi for anything. She never got annoyed.

“That’s not enough, you need to teach it: Lumi, the fairy girl.”

“Then I really can’t teach it that.”

They chatted casually and drove to the early market. It was almost the New Year, so there were a lot of people. The vehicles were lined up at the entrance of the early market. Lumi wasn’t in a hurry. She played a song by Shan Tianfang for her second uncle. Lumi listened for a few lines and shook her head and swayed, imitating, “Two flowers bloom, each with its own branch…”

A black car drove past from the opposite side of the road, turned around at the end, and joined the queue. Lumi saw it, it was Tu Ming.

She pretended not to see him. She hadn’t slept well last night because she was angry with him, and she didn’t want to deal with him now. She ignored him, but he called. “Aren’t you in line at the entrance of the early market?”

“What’s wrong?”

“When you go to get the meat cut later, save me a lamb shank and eight live crabs. If I drive in, they’ll be gone.”

“How much will you pay me for helping you grab a lamb shank? I have to catch crabs too.”

“If there are two lamb shanks, I’ll treat you.”

“What if there aren’t?”

“I’ll pay up.”

“Okay.”

Lumi finished speaking and hung up the phone. She didn’t say anything else. His parents were in the car. When she drove past, Lumi saw them. She couldn’t act out in front of the elders, she understood that.

“That colleague from last time, right? She’s also here to buy New Year’s goods?”

“Yeah, I saw her car after I drove past.”

“It’s a good thing you ran into her, otherwise your grandpa wouldn’t have gotten his lamb shank and he would have gotten angry.” He’s a big kid, sometimes if he can’t get a bite of something he wants, he’ll get angry.

“I told you to leave early, but you had to dawdle.” Tu Yanjing chided her, and they both smiled at each other, neither of them angry about the reprimand.

Tu Ming saw Yi Wanqiu and didn’t ask much about the woman next to her. He probably saw Lumi and thought they weren’t on the same page. They weren’t on the same page, their relationship ended unilaterally before it even started.

They finally parked the car, and it was almost noon. Tu Ming called Lumi, “Did you buy it?”

“Yes, I did. I’m getting the meat trimmed.”

“I’ll come get it from you.”

“Okay.”

Tu Ming told his parents to go buy other things first, and he went to get the crabs. It was the New Year, after all, and the meat stalls were crowded with people. Lumi was standing there, her ponytail and white down jacket making her stand out. Tu Ming walked next to her and peeked over. Two lamb shanks had been trimmed, the meat was being ground, and the shank bones were being chopped.

Amidst the smell of meat, Lumi smelled a nice scent. She turned her head towards Tu Ming. His beard was clean-shaven, his jaw was covered in a layer of blue, he looked very refreshed. Their eyes met, and she looked away.

“Two lamb shanks, you pay, I’ll take one.”

“Okay, thanks.”

Tu Ming looked down at her, his usual playful demeanor gone, a trace of bad mood on his face. “Where are the crabs?”

“In my car, you can take them later.”

“How much?”

“A thousand.” Lumi blurted out, she would use his money to buy incense, to vent her anger! You won’t have any more after this.

“Is a thousand enough?” Tu Ming asked her, mimicking Lumi’s serious tone.

Lumi turned her face away. She could see a hint of a smile in his eyes, he was just teasing her! Her anger flared up, who wants to deal with you! She picked up a bag of the prepared lamb shank meat and walked away. Tu Ming picked up the other bag and quickly caught up with her. He bent over and grabbed the plastic bag in her hand, “Give me that, it’s heavy.”

Lumi begrudgingly threw it to him, walking ahead with her head held high. She swung her ponytail, announcing her anger to the world. Tu Ming followed behind her, like her attendant, like her bodyguard. They looked quite funny walking together.

Yi Wanqiu and Tu Yanjing were buying dried goods at the peanut and melon seed stand. When they turned around, they saw the two of them, one in front of the other. They exchanged glances.

“What’s going on?” Tu Yanjing asked her.

Yi Wanqiu shook her head, “Something’s not right.”

“Let me give you some advice, don’t ask, don’t meddle.”

“Okay.”

Tu Ming and Lumi walked to her car. The trunk was open, he put Lumi’s bag of lamb shank in it, then casually picked up the crabs, looking very interested, he asked her, “Movie?”

“No!” Lumi’s face flushed red, “Don’t you dare mention movies!”

“You unilaterally declared it over.” Tu Ming reminded her.

“You agreed!”

“…What else? Do you want to beat me up like Zhang Qing?” Tu Ming asked her.

Lumi was speechless for a moment. She glared at him angrily before saying, “I beat him up because he cheated and didn’t even know he was wrong! He keeps trying to get in touch with me! I haven’t gotten physical with anyone else! I’m not that kind of person! Oh right, you probably think I am. In your mind, I’m not only that kind of person, I’m also a sex-obsessed woman, a useless subordinate who can’t be salvaged.”

“When you were flirting with me, you did whatever you wanted, I let you say all kinds of things, about taking things slow, about liking deep conversations.”

“Whoever wants to have deep conversations with you, go find them. What kind of movie are you talking about with me? Do I need a movie? I can find someone to accompany me anytime, unlike you, a divorced…” Lumi saw the sudden sharp look in Tu Ming’s eyes and quickly clamped her mouth shut.

You don’t insult someone by bringing up their weaknesses. What nonsense did she just say! She wanted to sew her own mouth shut.

So that was the problem, he was divorced.

Tu Ming seemed to suddenly understand why Lumi’s attitude towards him was a bit arrogant. It was because he was divorced, she had already decided that her relationship with him would stop at desire, so she didn’t talk to him about anything else, she just wanted to have something happen with him. In her mind, he wasn’t even as good as Tang Wuyi, whom she had only just met.

Tu Ming turned and left. This time, he wasn’t angry, his dignity had been trampled on by Lumi.  He had spent the whole night sleepless, thinking of a plan to make Lumi take things slow with him, like a naive young man. That plan assumed that Lumi liked him too, that all they needed to do was grow together.

What a joke.

He put his things in the car and transferred a thousand yuan to Lumi. He didn’t say anything else.

Tu Ming didn’t want to say anything to Lumi, there was nothing good to say. From the beginning, she had put him in a lower position in her heart, teasing him like a cat playing with a mouse. He avoided her, she continued to tease him. He had felt guilty before for rejecting her, but she didn’t care at all.

When he found Yi Wanqiu, even though he had regained his composure, his clenched jaw betrayed his terrible mood, even worse than when he got his divorce certificate.

Yi Wanqiu and Tu Yanjing exchanged glances. As they walked past a girl with a ponytail and a white down jacket on the road outside, they suddenly felt that this girl was not very likable. Nothing good would come of this.

Even though Yi Wanqiu felt that she was being narrow-minded, she had given birth to her child, and seeing him get upset like this, she found it ridiculous.

Lumi didn’t take the money. She replied, “I don’t want it, I was just joking.”

She wanted to explain that she didn’t mean it, that she spoke without thinking when she was angry. She felt that what she had said was particularly bad.

“This movie is pretty good, shall we go this afternoon?” She sent Tu Ming a screenshot, then added, “Watch the movie, then go eat, then walk around, okay?”

Tu Ming saw the message, but he didn’t reply.

His pride and dignity wouldn’t allow him to have anything to do with Lumi again, at least not now. He put his phone in his pocket and didn’t look at it again.

When they left the market, Lumi’s car was in front of Tu Ming’s car.  Tu Ming caught up to her and turned onto another road.

“Take the lamb shank to grandpa’s first?” Tu Ming asked Yi Wanqiu.

“Okay. Then take the crabs to your grandfather’s, and then drop us off at home. That’s our mission for today. We’ll have dinner at your grandma’s house first, then we’ll go to your grandpa’s house for midnight seafood dumplings, just like every year.”

“Okay.”

“Aren’t you feeling down? Why don’t you come home and have dinner with us?” Yi Wanqiu finally couldn’t hold back and asked him.

“I don’t need to, I worked overtime too much these past few days, I want to go home and catch up on sleep.”

“Then take some scallion and egg pancakes with you later, you love them.”

“Okay, thanks, Mom.”

Yi Wanqiu looked back at Tu Yanjing, meaning, say something!  Tu Yanjing shook his head, don’t bother, don’t meddle in your child’s affairs, you can’t control him.

Yi Wanqiu sighed.

Tu Ming took his parents to deliver the things. They sat with their elders for a while, then took his parents home.  It was already evening when they arrived. He found a book, lay down on the sofa, but couldn’t focus on a single word. All he could hear was Lumi’s words: “You, a divorced…”

Tu Ming was very angry when he first heard it, and now he felt a belated pang of heartache. It was a deep, lingering pain, the kind that wouldn’t be released.

To this day, he didn’t feel like he had done anything unforgivable in his previous marriage. He also believed that his divorce was justified. Only now did he realize that the words “divorced” themselves were wrong in Lumi’s eyes. Because of those two words, they were cut off from any real possibility of being together.

Tu Ming understood, but he just felt that Lumi was terrible.

She was sincere and enthusiastic towards people, she had no ulterior motives, she lived in the moment. He really liked that about her. But she was also really bad, or maybe all her bad intentions were directed at him.  In any case, she was too bad.

When Lumi called, he hung up and sent her a message: “Don’t call me again.  Don’t have any private contact with me besides work.”

“If you can’t do that, I’ll quit.”

“Also, it’s none of my business if you want to sleep with anyone, have a one-night stand, drink, or be crazy. Just don’t flirt with me anymore, I find it disgusting.”

Lumi saw Tu Ming’s message, and she suddenly felt very sad. She had never experienced anything like this before, it felt like someone had ripped a piece of her heart out. She cried and called Shang Zhi Tao, “Shang Zhi Tao, I’m so sad, Master Will thinks I’m disgusting.”

“I’m not that bad, why did I say such terrible things?”

Shang Zhi Tao listened to Lumi cry on the other end of the phone. They had known each other for a few years. Lumi always stood in front of her, charging into battle, afraid that she would be wronged. When Shang Zhi Tao encountered difficulties, Lumi would always say, “Don’t cry, what are you afraid of? It’s just a little thing. You wait, I’ll solve it for you!”

This person who almost never cried was now crying so sadly on the phone.

Shang Zhi Tao felt very sorry for her. She didn’t know what had happened, but she also felt happy for her. It was as if the fearless Lumi, who used to be so tough, suddenly had a soft spot.  She had truly come out of her secluded world and into the bustling, busy world.

“Lumi, I feel like I’ve met a different you.”

“What?” Lumi wiped her nose and asked her.

“A… you who’s experienced heartbreak for the first time.”

This is when you start to truly show your soft side to someone.

This is when you truly start to love someone.