Proofreader: Sandra

Chapter 150

It was already past ten in the morning when the two-deck cruise ship finally slowly departed from the dock at Xinchuan Port.

The sky remained clear, and the typhoon had not arrived earlier than expected.

The man who had just jumped onto the ship was Song Wen, while the one who boarded earlier with the camera was Lu Siyu.

The two hadn’t seen each other for nearly three days, and now they unexpectedly encountered each other on this ship.

In these three days, Lu Siyu had been following the clues left by Xu Changying, pursuing his leads along the way.

Song Wen, on the other hand, had been doing everything he could to track Lu Siyu’s whereabouts.

Last night, Lu Siyu finalized his trip to Nansha Island. This journey was a must for him. However, the timing was unfortunate as it coincided with the approaching typhoon. Taking a chance, he bought a ticket for the island and found out that due to the typhoon, not many tickets had been sold. He was relieved when he learned that the ship was not canceled because of the typhoon.

While waiting at the port earlier, Lu Siyu confirmed that Song Wen was not among the crowd. To his surprise, Song Wen still managed to catch up after they boarded the ship.

The first-floor cabin of the ship was empty. As Lu Siyu sat there, he first spotted Song Wen. His heart raced, unsure how to face this unexpected meeting. Instinctively, he tried to hide, hurriedly getting up and heading toward the tea room.

Song Wen had just rushed in from outside, placing his bag on the luggage rack and scanning the area.

There were not many passengers on the ship. Aside from the two girls they had seen at the railing, there were only three or four other people. With a quick glance, he immediately spotted Lu Siyu.

In the spacious cabin, Lu Siyu’s nervous movement only exposed him further, leaving him no place to hide. Song Wen walked a few steps and pushed him into the tea room, then quickly locked the door behind him with a loud click.

Lu Siyu knew he couldn’t avoid this anymore. He took a few steps back and leaned against a cabinet. He hadn’t expected to meet Song Wen again so soon and nervously licked his lips, his eyes darting away, unable to look directly at the person in front of him.

Song Wen stepped closer, standing opposite him, and placed his hand on the side of Lu Siyu’s head, effectively trapping him. In a low, angry voice, he said, “Let’s see where you can run to now.”

Surrounded by the vast sea, they were now on a cruise ship in the middle of the ocean.

Lu Siyu felt like a prey trapped in a cage by a hunter, with nowhere to hide and nowhere to escape. He lowered his head, unable to speak.

Leaving abruptly and drugging Song Wen was not a good solution, but at that moment, it was the best plan Lu Siyu could think of.

So what should he say now? Should he apologize? Continue to explain? Or defend himself like a fugitive? Everything he wanted to say had already been written in that letter, which took all the courage he had.

He was prepared to face Song Wen’s questioning, blame, or even…

There was a small window on the side of the tea room facing the sea, letting in light. The ship should be far from the shore by now, and as it rocked with the waves, the tea room swayed, giving an almost surreal feeling of floating on water.

In that instant, Song Wen suddenly reached out with his other hand to hold Lu Siyu’s waist and then kissed him on the lips.

Lu Siyu had imagined Song Wen’s reaction when he found out the truth. Perhaps suspicion, disdain, or anger, but never this…

It was not a gentle kiss; it was a bit domineering. Song Wen’s hand firmly held his body, leaving no room for struggle. His glasses got in the way, so Song Wen took them off his nose and placed them on a nearby table.

At that moment, Song Wen discarded all rationality. This was something he had always wanted to do.

Previously, Song Wen had thought Lu Siyu was shy and slow to warm up. He had given him time, cautiously probing and approaching him, trying to melt the ice around him. But now he realized Lu Siyu’s concerns were entirely different…

Lu Siyu had little experience with kissing and quickly found himself struggling to breathe. He wanted to push Song Wen away or say something, but Song Wen only let him go for a second before deepening the kiss. Lu Siyu felt his lips and tongue being pried open, and the words were swallowed back, leaving him to utter a muffled sound.

After a long while, Song Wen finally let him go. Lu Siyu panted slightly, feeling his heart pounding in his chest. His pale face blushed deeply, the redness spreading from his cheeks to his ears. Song Wen’s hand moved from his waist to his neck, tracing the delicate line and the prominent Adam’s apple. His fingers brushed over a red mole on Lu Siyu’s neck before resting their foreheads together and asking.

“What should I do with you?”

“I…” Lu Siyu could only say one word before his voice caught. His eyes felt hot as if something wanted to spill out, but he tried hard to hold it back. He swallowed the lump in his throat and said, “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to drag you into this.”

“Why do you insist on keeping me out of your world?” Song Wen asked, looking at him.

“I…” Lu Siyu was stuck again, unable to lie under Song Wen’s intense gaze.

Song Wen spoke again, “If you don’t care about me at all, then give me back the cup. You took it because you still care, right?”

Lu Siyu turned his head away, still coldly rejecting Song Wen. “Because I’m an unlucky person who brings misfortune to others. My dad, my mom, my brother—all of them are dead, and I’m the only one still alive. Someone like me doesn’t deserve warmth and beautiful emotions.”

These were words he had buried deep in his heart. Perhaps due to his unusual experiences, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of inferiority deep inside.

The more proud and indifferent he appeared on the outside, the more self-conscious and insecure he felt inside.

Outward appearances fade to skeletons, and money is merely external. He felt insignificant, and at his core, abnormal. This sense of inferiority had even led him to abandon the world of the living for a long time. He couldn’t interact with normal people and only wanted to communicate with corpses. Fundamentally, he felt unworthy of Song Wen.

This was the first time they discussed this topic. Song Wen reached out and gently stroked his back. “Your experiences, your talents, your strengths, your weaknesses—without any one of them, you wouldn’t be the complete you. I love you just as you are, to the point where I can’t help myself. I can’t sleep or eat well without you, and I’m haunted by thoughts of you. I followed you here, willing to die if necessary.”

Lu Siyu’s voice wavered, trembling as he said, “I… I can’t accept you getting hurt because of me. If one day you suffer misfortune because of me, it would be more painful than death.”

“So you’d rather not accept this love? So you reject me? Push me away?” Song Wen wanted to pry open his chest and see what was in that beating heart, why they were always on different wavelengths. “You’re fundamentally wrong in thinking that.”

Lu Siyu shook his head and softly said, “No…” Even now, he chose to reject, unable to accept or even consider the possibility.

Song Wen paused, looking at him, and said, “You told me your secret, so I want to tell you one of mine in exchange.”

Lu Siyu looked up at him, not knowing why Song Wen suddenly brought this up. “What is it?”

Song Wen said, “I’ve disliked elevators, darkness, and rain since I was a child because my father once took me to the scene of the 519 case. I probably have claustrophobia or some other condition. Whenever I encounter those dark, small rooms, my heart races uncontrollably, and I feel like I’m about to faint.”

This was the first time Song Wen had voluntarily mentioned this to anyone, especially to someone he liked. He had spent a long time coming to terms with this imperfect side of himself. Now he was revealing this weakness, like ripping open an old wound.

Lu Siyu knew some of Song Wen’s habits, but this was the first time hearing it from Song Wen himself. Though it was unrelated to him, he felt a bit guilty and softly asked, “Was it because you saw the bodies in the basement?”

Song Wen responded with a hum. “I used to see some psychologists and tried various methods to overcome it… Now, it’s much better. Do you know why?”

Lu Siyu shook his head.

Song Wen looked at him and said, “Because of you…” He paused and then explained, “There was one time when we entered the basement of the Wushan Nursing Home, and we were both locked in that dark basement. Another time was when you climbed the South City Tower, and I had to quickly reach the sniper point across from it, so I took the elevator. And then there was the time you fell into the water. When I jumped in, it was pitch black all around…”

He spoke lightly now, but each of those instances was like a battle with himself. Song Wen still remembered the feelings of suffocation, dizziness, rapid heartbeats, and loss of control. But as long as he thought of Lu Siyu, those feelings would lessen. It was as if, for him, even mountains of swords and seas of fire were nothing to fear.

Lu Siyu listened to Song Wen’s voice, hearing him recount these moments in a low tone. He still stood beside Song Wen, held gently by him. He could smell Song Wen’s pleasant scent and feel the warmth of his hands. He had always avoided facing his own heart, but as Song Wen spoke, Lu Siyu felt his insides twist. He realized he felt a deep compassion for him.

He now understood that Song Wen had done so much for him—some things he had seen, and some he hadn’t.

In front of him and others, Song Wen had never shown weakness, always moving forward without hesitation.

But he was also human, with a heart, weaknesses, flaws, and the ability to feel pain.

“I once thought I couldn’t do those things, but I did them because I wanted to protect you… So, what right do you have to make decisions on your own without considering my thoughts?”

As Song Wen spoke, he stared directly into Lu Siyu’s beautiful eyes. “I’m here now, which means I’ve made my choice. I don’t care about so-called burdens, and I don’t see everything you’ve done as protection. We’ve gone through so many life-and-death situations together, and you still want to push me away?”

This sentence shattered the defense Lu Siyu had been holding onto. A tear suddenly fell from his right eye, sliding down to his lips.

Song Wen kissed his lips and then kissed away that tear, tasting its slight saltiness. “You shouldn’t see me as your Achilles’ heel, thinking that isolating me is protecting me. Lu Siyu, I want to be the armor that protects you. Lu Siyu, I like you…”

“Song Wen…” Lu Siyu lowered his head, his hands clenched into fists, his shoulders trembling slightly, his heart in turmoil. Then he slowly reached out and tightly embraced the person in front of him.

On this vast ocean, in this quiet tea room, they held each other tightly, gently swaying with the waves.

It seemed like years since he had cried like this. Since childhood, since losing his parents, Lu Siyu had felt he lost the ability to like anything, to pursue happiness, and to love and be loved.

Other children could easily lift their little faces, open their small hands, and innocently say, “I want.” But he could only stand silently in a dark corner, burying all his thoughts deep inside.

Others could easily express their likes and loves, casually talk about romance, but he always felt out of place, unable to speak.

For so many years, he had become accustomed to pretending he didn’t need anything, pretending he was fine alone. He repeatedly pushed away those who were good to him. But there was one person who slowly approached him, giving him warmth again and again.

He pulled him back from the brink of death more than once; he was his connection to this world…

Like a blade slicing through ice, he helped shed the cold exterior, making his once indifferent heart begin to beat again.

During those days and nights spent together, being protected, cared for, and looked after, he wasn’t completely heartless.

He had long liked him, among the billions of people in this world, it had to be him. He just didn’t know how to express it. Now, he finally dared to face his own heart and this feeling.

Lu Siyu’s tears flowed uncontrollably, and then he choked out, “Song Wen, I like you too…”

Song Wen held Lu Siyu, feeling his body tremble. “I know…”

He comforted him softly. The person before him didn’t seem like an older brother; rather, he seemed like a small child.

After a while, Lu Siyu stopped crying. Song Wen wiped his eyes with a tissue and looked at him. It had only been three days since they last saw each other, but Lu Siyu seemed even thinner. Song Wen couldn’t help but kiss his lips again, savoring the gentle, soft touch, carefully and repeatedly, as if it would never be enough.

He had once thought he almost lost him.

Now, he held him in his arms again. The person before him was alive and warm.

Nothing could separate them.

Suddenly, the boat swayed violently, creating a moment of weightlessness. The glass teapots in the tea room clinked, and there was a knock on the door.

Song Wen walked over to open the door, and Lu Siyu quickly wiped his eyes and straightened his clothes.

Outside was a ship’s crew member who handed Song Wen a menu and said, “Excuse me, sir, please choose your lunch.”

This one-way trip would take nearly three hours, meaning everyone would have lunch on the boat. Song Wen took the menu and saw that it offered some shrimp and fish dishes.

Song Wen chose seafood fried rice and handed the menu to Lu Siyu, letting him choose as well.

The female crew member glanced at the two handsome men and reminded them, “We’ll be approaching the edge of the typhoon soon. Please don’t open the windows. The captain said it’s best for everyone to stay in the central hall during the typhoon.”

Song Wen replied, “We understand. We’ll head there soon.”

After the crew member left, Song Wen locked the door again.

The tea room was not very large. A row of cabinets lined one wall, filled with teaware and cups. In the center, there was a square table with four chairs.

Lu Siyu had already put his glasses back on, the ones Song Wen had removed earlier, and he sat down in one of the chairs, his head lowered. Song Wen walked over to him, pulled out a chair, and sat down as well.

Lu Siyu looked up and asked, “Captain Song, what about my dog?”

Back then, he had left so resolutely, but now he remembered. Song Wen replied, “I left it with Fu Linjiang. It’s having a great time with the other police dogs, so much so that it doesn’t want to come home…”

During this time, Lu Siyu had already composed himself and wiped away his tears. Except for the slight redness at the corners of his eyes, there was no sign that he had been crying. But seeing him like this, Song Wen’s heart softened again, and he couldn’t help but lean in to kiss him.

“We’re on the boat…” Lu Siyu said, lowering his head, protesting against Song Wen’s repeated actions.

Song Wen smiled and said, “No way, I need to make up for all the ones I missed before. Or… if you kiss me, I’ll let you off for now.”

Hearing this, Lu Siyu looked up at Song Wen. His delicate face was expressionless.

Song Wen thought, maybe he went too far and made him angry… Before he could say anything, Lu Siyu suddenly leaned in seriously and earnestly, lightly brushing his lips against Song Wen’s, then looked up at him.

The kiss was so gentle, yet not perfunctory. For some reason, this kiss had a more profound impact than all the previous ones. Song Wen felt his face heating up.

The more indifferent and serious Lu Siyu acted, the harder it was for Song Wen to control himself.

If they weren’t on the boat, Song Wen would have wanted to take him to bed right then and there. But he had just promised Lu Siyu, and now he needed to keep his word. He turned to the previous topic and asked seriously in a lowered voice, “Can you tell me now? Why are you here?”

Lu Siyu hesitated for a moment and couldn’t help but ask, “First, answer two questions for me. How exactly did you find me?” He thought he had hidden his tracks well and didn’t know where he had slipped up.