Chapter 49 : Second sister, do you hate them?

Cui Yingnian is Cui Yunzhao’s great-aunt, the eldest sister of her grandfather, and is about seven or eight years older than him. When she married into the Wang family in Bianjing, it was a well-matched union. After marriage, Cui Yingnian, like an ordinary woman, gave birth and managed the household, but she never gave up her hobbies.

In her youth, she enjoyed reading historical texts, and after marriage, her interests aligned with her husband’s, leading to a harmonious relationship. Gradually, she developed a love for poetry and literature, supported by her husband. Despite societal norms, her status, and family responsibilities, she pursued her passions and continued to strive for improvement, eventually achieving great success in poetry with her renowned work, “Zhe Zhi Ci.”

Cui Yingnian’s life is truly admirable and enviable. However, what Cui Yunzhao told Huo Xinzhi was a bit misleading. In truth, Cui Yunzhao had never met her great-aunt. By the time she was born, Cui Yingnian was already over sixty. Although she used to return to the Cui family every New Year to see her relatives, her health declined, and her husband fell ill, preventing her from returning again.

As a child, Cui Yunzhao often heard stories about her great-aunt and memorized her poems, viewing her as a role model. Yet, amid the daily routines and rules of the Cui household, she gradually forgot the youthful aspirations she once had. It wasn’t until she moved to the Changle Bieyuan, where the palace maids helped her find various books, that she came across her great-aunt’s notes.

In those notes, she read a few powerful lines that sparked a realization: “We should not be confined by our hearts; we should reach for the heavens.” Although she had never met her great-aunt in this life or the last, Cui Yingnian had given her both her initial and final aspirations, helping her understand what kind of person she should become.

From that moment on, she began to read, not the poetry and rules of her youth, but travelogues from distant lands, various historical accounts, medical texts, and treatises on celestial phenomena, even studying “Tiangong Kaiwu” cover to cover. In her free time, she conversed with the palace maids, inquiring about their pasts and thoughts.

These maids came from all corners of the world, each with unique experiences. By listening, observing, and reflecting, Cui Yunzhao began to grasp the meaning of life as she approached thirty. Looking back, she realized that was when she truly began to understand. Fortunately, fate granted her a second chance, bringing her back ten years to the beginning of everything.

Now she had the opportunity to change the destinies of many people, including her own. Cui Yunzhao looked at Huo Xinzhi, her eyes sparkling like stars in the sky or the moon in the water. She always carried herself gracefully, her smile warm and inviting.

Under her gaze, Huo Xinzhi felt herself stand taller, slowly straightening her back that had been bent by a tragic past. “Sister, you’re still so young, with a long life ahead. I believe it’s never too late to move forward.” Cui Yunzhao replied, “I believe you can manage the household very well.”

“From now on, the family will rely on you, and Mother will depend on you, as will the younger siblings.” Her words filled Huo Xinzhi with immense courage. A powerful strength rose from deep within her, almost making her glow with newfound confidence. She turned back to Cui Yunzhao and nodded firmly, “Okay, I will do my best.”

After their conversation, Cui Yunzhao felt a sense of relief wash over her. She didn’t rush to leave but instead engaged Huo Xinzhi in some casual chatter. “I’ve noticed that Eleventh Brother has been sulking these past few days. Is it still about that day?” Huo Xinzhi shook her head, a bit helpless. “That day, he didn’t listen to Mother. He felt embarrassed and didn’t dare to speak much.”

“He’s still young, there’s no need to be so hard on himself.” The atmosphere had been tense, and he had been frightened, such reactions are understandable, especially for a boy.

Huo Xinzhi sighed. “Perhaps he thinks Grandmother is better. After all, he and Liu’er were twins, and when they were born, Liu’er was frail. Mother and Father favored Liu’er more, but Grandmother treated him especially well. It makes sense he would seek her favor.”

“But…” Huo Xinzhi sighed again. “I’ll talk to him about it, the younger siblings don’t need to worry too much.” Cui Yunzhao smiled and said, “Thank you, Sister.”

With their conversation winding down, Cui Yunzhao stood up, smiling. “Sister, if you have time, feel free to come find me. We can go out and have some fun or visit the shop together.”

“Sure,” Huo Xinzhi replied as she stood up to see Cui Yunzhao out. Just as she lifted her head, she spotted Huo Xinliu peeking from the opposite door.

Cui Yunzhao paused, then smiled at her softly, speaking slowly, “Liu girl, come visit your sister-in-law when you have time.” Huo Xinliu looked at her in surprise, then shyly nodded and replied, “Okay.”

Cui Yunzhao left the West Courtyard. That evening, Huo Tan returned and, while washing his face, said, “I consulted with General Lu, and he also thinks the plan is feasible. He’s already written to Commander Guo, so we should have results in the next day or two, regardless of the outcome.”

Cui Yunzhao nodded. “I understand. By the way, My lord, I’ll be going back home tomorrow to check on my younger siblings.” Huo Tan asked, “Should I accompany you?” But Cui Yunzhao didn’t agree.

“No need, I’m just going back to see them. There’s nothing else to do. You should go to the barracks instead.” Since she insisted, Huo Tan didn’t press the matter further.

After dinner, Cui Yunzhao picked up a medical book to read while Huo Tan was busy in the study. After reading a few pages, her curiosity piqued, she walked over to the study door to peek inside and found Huo Tan reading as well.

Hearing her footsteps, Huo Tan turned around, surprised to see her. He rubbed his nose and asked, “What? Is it strange to see me reading?” Cui Yunzhao was indeed a bit surprised, but remembering how court officials praised him for being both cultured and martial, she swallowed her surprise.

“It’s not that, I just didn’t expect you to be reading history books instead of military strategy. This book…” Cui Yunzhao squinted and realized it was a general history book she had read in her youth. “Is this my book?”

Huo Tan smiled. “Yes, it’s indeed your book. Recently, after chatting with you, I realized you have a vast knowledge. It makes me think that one should read more; only by reading more can one know how to handle things when they arise.”

“However, many of your history books are too difficult to understand; this one isn’t so bad.” Cui Yunzhao couldn’t help but admire Huo Tan. If he didn’t succeed, who would? His willingness to acknowledge his shortcomings and strive to improve was commendable.

Cui Yunzhao moved to the bookshelf and selected a few books. “This one is what I started reading when I was young; it’s simple and easy to understand. I’ll pick out a few more for you so you can read them when you have time.”

Seeing her take this seriously instead of looking down on him, Huo Tan couldn’t help but smile. “You’re truly wonderful.”

After a while, Cui Yunzhao began to feel tired. When Huo Tan heard her yawn, he put down his book, stood up, and returned to their bedroom. “My lady, it’s time to settle in.”

Cui Yunzhao nodded. After both of them freshened up and changed, they lay down. Perhaps because they had talked so much during the day, their relationship felt closer. Huo Tan moved his hand, and eventually, he discreetly crawled out from under the covers to hold Cui Yunzhao’s hand.

Cui Yunzhao slowly opened her eyes, quietly observing the tent in the darkness. After a moment, she closed her eyes again. In that moment, she felt incredibly secure.

Beside her, Huo Tan whispered, “Good night, my lady.” Cui Yunzhao gently smiled and quickly fell into a deep sleep.

The next morning, when Cui Yunzhao woke up, Huo Tan was still not there. He had gone to the barracks early, as was his habit, and she had grown accustomed to it by now.

For breakfast, he had brought back osmanthus cake and glutinous rice chicken. After eating, Cui Yunzhao set off in a carriage with Mother Xia. She had told Huo Tan she was going home to see the younger siblings, which was one reason; the other was to check the family library for the book *Chronicles of Chu*.

If she could find it, that would be great; if not, she would have to ask the shopkeeper to help her search for it. The Cui and Huo families weren’t far apart, and soon, the carriage stopped at the Cui family’s entrance.

At this time, the main door of the Cui residence was open, but it was very quiet inside. The doorman, seeing the second young lady return, hurried over with a flattering smile. “Miss, you’re back!”

The last time Cui Yunzhao had visited, it had caused quite a stir in the Cui household. The servants had realized that this second young lady was different from before, and they whispered among themselves that it was because the head of the family had pushed her too hard, leading to a falling out.

They all thought she might not return until the New Year, but unexpectedly, she appeared at the Cui family’s door as if nothing had happened. As the doorman approached, he was about to send someone to inform Lady He Lan.

Cui Yunzhao, aware of their thoughts, said directly, “I want to visit the library to select a few books to take back and read, and I also want to stop by the music hall to see Aunt San.”

She had always been kind to others while at home, and although she was now married and had had a dispute with the head of the family, she remained polite. She explained everything to the doorman, as they needed to know what to do; otherwise, they would be reprimanded by Lady He Lan.

The doorman felt touched and replied, “Thank you, Miss. We will handle it properly.”

Since they weren’t here to pick a fight, they just needed to report to Lady He Lan. Whether she wanted to see the second young lady was her business, and the servants wouldn’t be held responsible.

As they spoke, Cui Yunzhao had already entered the inner courtyard. Mother Xia, quick-witted, called over a young maid sweeping the courtyard and instructed her to inform the third wife in the music hall that the second young lady would be arriving shortly.

Cui Yunzhao headed straight to the library. During her time at home, she often enjoyed reading there. After marrying Huo Tan, she occasionally returned to borrow books, but she never took rare books, if she really wanted to read one, she would have someone copy it for her. So this time, she went directly to the library.

The most valuable asset of the Cui family was probably this three-story small building. It was located right at the center of the inner courtyard, surrounded by bamboo groves, creating a misty, serene atmosphere. The building had a long history, over a hundred years old, appearing ancient and weighty, exuding the charm of time.

There was always a young servant guarding the library door. Just as Cui Yunzhao was about to lead Mother Xia inside, the young servant stopped her. “Second young lady… you can’t go in.”

Cui Yunzhao raised an eyebrow slightly. How strange, she couldn’t even enter her own family’s library.

She didn’t get angry but calmly stood at the door, looking at the young servant. He was only about sixteen or seventeen, his face still youthful, and he blushed at her gaze, clearly feeling awkward.

The servant glanced at another young servant nearby, who remained silent. Finally, he stammered, “Second young lady, this is the family head’s order.”

Cui Yunzhao couldn’t help but chuckle. Her second uncle really had a good temper, pretending to be magnanimous and then forbidding her from entering the library.

“Why can’t I go in?” she asked.

The young servant hesitated. “Um, the family head didn’t specify… Second young lady, you see…”

Cui Yunzhao knew that Cui Xu didn’t have a valid reason, he was just taking his anger out on the servants. Since he couldn’t outright refuse her entry, he resorted to this sneaky tactic. She certainly couldn’t make things difficult for a young servant.

She squinted slightly but felt no anger at all. If Cui Xu hadn’t acted, it wouldn’t be like him; otherwise, she would have to guard against any underhanded tricks he might pull behind her back.

Seeing she wasn’t angry, the young servant let out a sigh of relief and quietly suggested, “Second young lady, why not ask the mistress? The mistress…”

Before he could finish, the other young servant coughed, cutting him off. The atmosphere grew a bit awkward.

Cui Yunzhao turned directly to the other young servant. “Go to the Ming Shantang and say I want to enter the library, but my second uncle forbids it. Have my second aunt give a legitimate reason, I’ve never heard of such a rule in our family.”

The reason why the Cui daughters were sought after was precisely because of this large library. It contained astronomical and geographical texts, historical records, and a wide range of books that had appeared in the market. Not to mention the valuable rare books.

This was the foundation of the Cui family’s confidence. Because of this confidence and the family rules regarding education, the daughters of the Cui family could return home to borrow books, even rare ones could be copied.

Books did not belong solely to the Cui family; they belonged to anyone seeking knowledge in the world.

This was a rule established by the ancestors of the Cui family long ago, unchanged for over a hundred years, and Cui Xu didn’t have the guts to defy the family regulations. He and Lady He Lan likely wanted Cui Yunzhao to return home and cause a scene, then go out claiming she was ungrateful and didn’t understand sincerity. But Cui Yunzhao refused to make a fuss.

As one young servant heard Cui Yunzhao’s words, his face turned pale, but he dared not resist and could only reply, “Yes…”

Before he could leave, a light, lively voice rang out. “Is Second Sister back?”

“It’s freezing outside, let’s go into the library to talk! I haven’t spoken to you in so long!”

Cui Yunzhao recognized the voice immediately and turned to smile. “Fourth Sister, it’s been a while!”

The fourth young lady of the Cui family, Cui Yunqi, approached with her maid. At around thirteen or fourteen, she had an oval face and willow-like brows, and her petite stature made her especially adorable. Dressed in a pale yellow outfit with an intricately embroidered jacket, she looked particularly lively in the cold winter.

Her hair was styled in a double-loop bun, adorned with a glass hairpin, and her innocent smile was endearing. During their time at home, Cui Yunzhao had a decent relationship with her, but after such a long absence, she realized it had been many years since they last saw each other. After her divorce from Huo Tan in her past life, Cui Yunqi had visited her, but after moving to another courtyard, she never came again. Even during the New Year’s palace banquet, Cui Yunzhao hadn’t seen her, making it feel like many years had passed.

Seeing a familiar face suddenly brought Cui Yunzhao great joy. Especially now, at just thirteen, Cui Yunqi was still a tender young girl, making it even easier to reminisce about the past.

“Fourth Sister, why are you also at the library?” Cui Yunzhao asked, waiting for her to come closer.

Cui Yunqi ran up, lifting her skirt and beaming up at her. Cui Yunzhao then noticed that she was not the grown-up Cui Yunqi from her memories; she was still a child, shorter than Cui Yunzhao by half a head.

“It’s just a coincidence today,” Cui Yunqi said, wrapping her arm around Cui Yunzhao’s. “I happened to want to read some books, so I thought I’d come over to pass the time, and I didn’t expect to run into you!”

As she spoke, she glanced at the two young servants, deliberately making a fierce expression. “How are you treating my second sister?”

The young servants dared not respond.

Cui Yunqi easily brushed off the matter. “I’m going to have tea with my second sister in the library, you two go prepare.”

The young servants exchanged glances but said nothing this time, they opened the door and left. Cui Yunqi likely overheard their conversation, giving the servants an excuse while also helping Cui Yunzhao with her parents.

The Cui family wasn’t particularly populous, but there were still a decent number of members. Cui Yunzhao’s father was the eldest son, with two younger brothers and three sisters. Her second uncle was naturally Cui Xu, and her third uncle was named Cui Yi.

He seemed to be about seven or eight years younger than Cui Yunzhao’s father. He had passed the imperial examination in his youth and was now serving as an official elsewhere, not at home.

In the Cui family hierarchy, starting with the young ladies, the eldest Miss Cui is Cui Xu’s first daughter, who married into the Su family of Fulu a month before Cui Yunzhao. Cui Yunzhao herself is the second daughter. The third daughter is named Cui Yunrao, while the fourth, Cui Yunqi, is Cui Xu’s third daughter. The fifth daughter is Cui Yunlan, who is Cui Yunzhao’s biological sister. The sixth and seventh young ladies are the eldest and second daughters of her third uncle, who live with their family on duty and do not often return to Boling, so Cui Yunzhao is not familiar with them.

The Cui family has a fair number of daughters and sons. Although Cui Yunqi is the daughter of Cui Xu and Lady He Lan, she is cheerful and straightforward, always getting along well with Cui Yunzhao and taking good care of Cui Yunlan.

Once the two young servants had left, Cui Yunqi looked apologetically at Cui Yunzhao. “Second Sister, I’m so sorry. Father, he…”

Cui Yunzhao waved her hand and pulled her into the study. “It’s cold outside, let’s talk inside.”

The library couldn’t have a fire, nor did it have a heating stove, but it was naturally much warmer than outside since it sheltered them from the wind. The maid that Cui Yunqi brought was quick-witted and set up the table and chairs before stepping aside.

Cui Yunqi held onto Cui Yunzhao’s hand, and after they sat down together affectionately, she looked at Cui Yunzhao with curiosity. “What’s wrong? After just a few days, you don’t recognize me?”

Cui Yunzhao smiled and tapped her forehead. Cui Yunqi’s eyes sparkled with curiosity. “Second Sister, is it fun to get married?”

She sounded like a child. “Is getting married fun? I only know that once you leave home, you have to rely on yourself from now on.”

Cui Yunqi’s face suddenly fell.

Cui Yunzhao asked with a smile, “What’s wrong?”

Cui Yunqi looked up at her with red eyes, then quickly lowered her head again. “Second Sister, I understand now, it’s Father and Mother’s fault.”

Cui Yunzhao was a bit surprised by her words and couldn’t help but sigh. “Fourth Sister, they are them, and we are us. You and I are still good sisters.”

“You don’t need to worry about this, I see things clearly.”

Cui Yunqi still kept her head down. “Second Sister, do you hate them?”

Hate them? If it were about her own feelings, Cui Yunqi wouldn’t hate them. But she hated them for raising Cui Yunting poorly and for causing Cui Yunlan’s death. Because of Cui Yunlan, Cui Yunzhao no longer felt any familial affection for Cui Xu and his wife.

But she couldn’t say that to Cui Yunqi.

Cui Yunzhao thought for a moment and then spoke gently, “We are all one family, why talk about hate?”

She didn’t answer the question directly but added, “Actually, I’m getting along well with your brother-in-law.”

Cui Yunqi’s eyes suddenly widened.

She couldn’t help but lift her head, her earlier gloom replaced with curiosity. Cui Yunzhao couldn’t resist reaching out to pat her head.

“What’s wrong?”

Cui Yunqi was indeed curious. “Mother has been saying lately that she wants to find me a husband, but I don’t want to marry. I’m scared.”

“Can’t I just stay at home?”

When Cui Yunqi asked this, it seemed she wasn’t very certain herself. But Cui Yunzhao knew that in her past life, until her death at the age of twenty-three, Cui Yunqi had never married.

Cui Xu and Lady He Lan were cold-hearted towards their siblings, yet they were overly indulgent with their own children. The eldest Miss Cui married at nineteen, which was considered neither late nor early in Boling. By the time it came to Cui Yunqi, they had spoiled her even more, allowing her to remain at home until twenty.

Perhaps Cui Yunqi truly didn’t want to marry; every time she acted cute, Lady He Lan had no choice but to relent. Cui Yunzhao didn’t believe that a woman had to marry; what mattered was living well. At this moment, seeing the innocent look in Cui Yunqi’s eyes made her smile.

“That depends on you,” Cui Yunzhao said seriously. “Even though I only met your brother-in-law once before our marriage, we were still quite lucky. Our backgrounds don’t match, but our personalities are a good fit.”

Cui Yunzhao said this both as the truth and to reassure Cui Yunqi. She didn’t directly answer whether she hated Cui Xu and his wife; she couldn’t let the young girl dwell on that matter.

“So I think life right now is pretty good,” Cui Yunzhao continued, her eyes sparkling with genuine warmth.

Cui Yunqi let out a slight sigh of relief.

Cui Yunzhao added, “If you want to stay at home, you have to be prepared for people to talk about you. You should also find something to occupy yourself with. When a person has a sense of purpose, life becomes much easier.”

“Ultimately, this is your life. Your second uncle and second aunt care for you, so you can enjoy your freedom.”

“Qi’er, don’t waste this hard-earned freedom.”

Cui Yunqi seemed to grasp her words but was also confused; she blinked and leaned her face against Cui Yunzhao’s arm. The loose strands of hair obscured her brow and eyes, so Cui Yunzhao couldn’t see her expression, but she heard her say, “Second Sister is always so good; I really like you.”

Cui Yunzhao smiled.

The sisters chatted for a while, but soon felt it was getting a bit chilly in the library. Cui Yunzhao said she would go look for books, and Cui Yunqi didn’t disturb her.

Cui Yunzhao had been to the library many times and was quite familiar with the layout; she didn’t need anyone to guide her and went directly to the travel books section.

The Cui family’s library was well-organized, and in the travel section, the books were even arranged by location and content focus. Cui Yunzhao easily found travelogues documenting Mengchu and the Tianshui area.

Even with just these two places, there was a whole bookcase of books. After searching up and down twice without finding anything, Cui Yunzhao furrowed her brow slightly. Just as she was about to say something to Mother Xia, she heard Cui Yunqi’s voice from outside the door, “Second Sister, did you not find the book? Should we check the rare books room?”