On a dark, windy night— perfect for murder and arson— two sneaky figures appeared and vanished atop the walls of Chen Manor.

“Are you ready?” Helian Kong, dressed in night gear and with his face covered, asked the similarly clad Yin Yin beside him.

“Well……”

“What?” Even with her face covered, Yin Yin could still sense just how innocently expectant Helian Kong looked.

“We snuck out without telling Ling Long. If he finds out……” Yin Yin sounded worried. She had no intention of challenging Ling Long’s authority.

“Relax. He went to Qingfeng Town. He won’t be back anytime soon.” Helian Kong said with full confidence.

But plans never kept up with changes. According to the first law of novels, unexpected things always happened at times like this— like an assassin just happening to target the Chen family tonight, or the young miss eloping with a penniless scholar, or a maid caught having an affair with the young master.

……

Okay, maybe she was getting carried away.

Yin Yin tugged at the black cloth covering her face. “You’re really going through with this?”

Helian Kong nodded with conviction.

“This is a road of no return. Once you step on it, there’s no turning back.” Yin Yin said gravely.

Helian Kong nodded even more heroically.

“Our martial arts suck.” Yin Yin threw out her final trump card.

Helian Kong: “……”

“You—”

Yin Yin had barely spoken a word when Helian Kong interrupted her angrily, “Is this really the time to crush morale?!”

Yin Yin: “……” If not now, then when? After they’re inside? That’d be too late!

Seeing her fall silent, Helian Kong took a deep breath and prepared to leap from the wall— only to be pulled back by Yin Yin.

“Now what?!” Helian Kong flared.

“I just have one question. Do you even know where that cookbook is hidden?”

Helian Kong: “……”

The moon was very round.

The night wind was very cool.

Yin Yin and Helian Kong were very cold.

As the saying went, those who achieve greatness don’t fuss over details. So even without knowing where the cookbook was hidden, Yin Yin and Helian Kong still charged forward like warriors facing death.

“You…… hungry?” Yin Yin asked, watching Helian Kong rummage through Chen Manor’s kitchen, sweat beading on her forehead.

“Of course the recipe would be in the kitchen!” Helian Kong insisted as he continued his frantic search. “Oh! They’re having old duck soup tonight~”

Yin Yin: “……”

“I think I heard something in the kitchen.” Came a man’s voice from outside, scaring the two of them into holding their breath.

“Maybe it’s just a rat?” Another voice followed.

“Meow~” Helian Kong pinched his nose and let out a cat-like cry.

Yin Yin: “……”

Damn it, do you even know the difference between a rat and a cat?!

Yin Yin wanted to smack Helian Kong over the head with the iron pot in front of her.

“Oh, just a cat.” The two men strolled past the kitchen door.

Yin Yin and Helian Kong both let out a breath of relief.

Leaving the kitchen, they wandered around Chen Manor.

“This looks like the inner courtyard where the Chen family’s young miss lives~” Yin Yin walked to a window with interest. Like every lowlife rogue in history, she wet her finger with spit and poked a hole through the window paper.

“That’s the young miss? She’s quite the beauty!” Yin Yin elbowed Helian Kong. “You’re in luck~”

Helian Kong pouted. “You think she’s pretty? I think you’re better-looking.”

……

How was she supposed to argue with that?

Helian Kong dragged Yin Yin along and headed toward Lord Chen’s study. But they had barely arrived when someone shouted, “Thieves!”

Both of them jumped. What the hell? They hadn’t done anything yet! How were they already exposed?!

“It’s Yidi Hua!” The voice roared again. “Don’t let him get away!”

Yidi Hua^[1]a ground full of flowers? Yin Yin’s eyebrow twitched. She remembered Ling Long mentioning the name before. Yidi Hua was a famous thief known for leaving a trail of flower petals at every crime scene.

Then again, maybe it was just the shocking name that made him famous.

Soon, a figure flew over the roof of the study with fluid grace. Even in midair, he found time to wave at Yin Yin and Helian Kong.

In his hand was none other than Miao Yan’s 《One Hundred Homemade Dishes》.

“After him!” Helian Kong shouted and took off. Yin Yin hesitated for a second, then followed. Behind them, a swarm of house guards with torches gave chase. In a flash, both Helian Kong and Yidi Hua disappeared from sight.

Yin Yin frowned, then quickly leaped onto the wall and escaped into a quiet alley.

The shouts faded into the distance. Yin Yin worried that the entire crowd had gone after Helian Kong, that fool.

Even so, she had to admire his noble spirit of sacrifice.

Thinking that Helian Kong was sharp enough not to get caught, Yin Yin decided to head back to Zhuwang. But just as she turned a corner, she slammed straight into someone.

The person wore night clothes and had just taken off the black cloth covering his face. He looked at Yin Yin in surprise.

But Yin Yin was even more shocked.

How did the saying go again? In transmigration novels, the one thing you’re never short on is beautiful men!

She looked at the stunning man in front of her, involuntarily swallowing a gulp. That high nose bridge, those delicate lips, long lashes, and big eyes, they all came together in a breathtaking face.

Only two words could describe Yin Yin’s current mood—

“Quick! This way! I just saw someone run over here!”

The shouts and torches that had been fading returned with a roar, headed straight toward them.

Yin Yin had no time to react before the beautiful man in front of her chopped the side of her neck. She blacked out instantly.

Right before losing consciousness, she thought, I’d imagined all sorts of accidents, but I didn’t expect this to end with my own death……

I haven’t even kissed Ling Long yet!!!

She would die with regret.

────ρя


At a small ruined temple on the outskirts, the firewood crackled softly on the ground. Orange flames flickered, casting dancing shadows on Yin Yin’s face.

Propped against the wall, Yin Yin slowly came to. She stared at the fire, confused.

“You’re awake?” A voice, unfamiliar yet familiar, came from the fire. Yin Yin looked up, and the pain in her neck brought her memories rushing back.

Right! She’d been knocked out by this person!

But……

Yin Yin frowned at the beautiful man. “Why does your voice sound so feminine?”

The man smiled coldly. “Because I am a woman.”

Because I am a woman.

Because I am a woman.

……

What’s the world’s greatest distance? It’s not that a beautiful man stands before you but doesn’t love you— it’s that a beautiful man stands before you, and you don’t even realize he’s a she!

Yin Yin, RIP.

“If you dare faint on me again, I’ll make sure you never wake up.” The beauty said coldly, her voice like icicles stabbing into Yin Yin’s chest.

Yin Yin, who was just about to close her eyes again, snapped them open and stared at the woman. “Why…… do you look so familiar?”

Where had she seen the other party before?

“Miss Haitang?!!!” Yin Yin’s mouth dropped open in an O.

“That’s right. It’s me.” Haitang admitted easily. “You’re the girl who came to Caiqing Garden with Young Master Ling Long that day, right?”

“You saw through my disguise?” Yin Yin’s shock reached a new level.

Haitang sneered. “I’ve spent years in a brothel. Maybe I haven’t seen everything under the sun, but I can at least tell men from women. Only an idiot like Jiu’er would believe you’re a man.”

Yin Yin: “……”

She’d thought she did a pretty good job crossdressing.

Yin Yin eyed the cookbook Haitang held, her mouth twitching. “You’re the infamous Yidi Hua?”

“Yes.”

“……” Yin Yin tried hard to control her twitching face. “Is your brothel…… short on money lately?”

Haitang rolled her eyes. “I just like stealing things.”

Yin Yin: “……”

Can’t you pick a more low-key hobby?

“It’s satisfying to steal something you wanted to steal.” Haitang said with a little smile. “Though this cookbook is useless to me. I’ll return it later.”

Yin Yin: “……”

So you’re just really stealing for fun?!

She did recall Ling Long saying that this legendary thief, Yidi Hua, often returned what she stole. Many victims didn’t even report her. They simply waited for her to return their belongings. For such a thief of morals, principles, and conscience, Yin Yin had just three words— Deep. Well. Ice.^[2]深井冰 (shēn jǐng bing) near-homophone pun on 神經病 (shén jīng bing), meaning ‘lunatic’

“I don’t care about the loot. I care about the thrill of stealing. You wouldn’t understand.”

Yin Yin: “……”

It’s not that I don’t understand. It’s that the world is changing too fast.

“But……” Haitang’s gaze suddenly turned sharp as she looked at Yin Yin on the ground. “Now that you know my true identity……”

“I swear I won’t tell anyone!” Yin Yin raised a hand, swearing to the heavens.

Haitang said nothing. Yin Yin watched her nervously. Please don’t say something like ‘Only the dead keep secrets best’……

“Only the dead keep secrets best.”

Yin Yin: “……”

This time, before she could even protest in her head, Haitang had already drawn a dagger. The cold blade pressed against Yin Yin’s neck, gleaming in the moonlight.

Haitang’s expression was deadly serious. She truly intended to kill her.

Yin Yin: “……”

How should I respond to this kind of situation?

Simple— faint.

And so, Yin Yin passed out again.

────ρя


Zhuwang’s Headquarters

Helian Kong tiptoed toward his room. Ten steps…… five steps…… three steps…… almost there!

“Second Prince.”

Ling Long’s voice suddenly rang out behind him. Helian Kong shrieked in terror.

“Where did you go?” Ling Long stepped closer. Helian Kong backed up until he was pressed against the door. “Haha…… I just went for a walk.”

“And Yinyin? Hongwei saw you leave together.”

Helian Kong flinched. “She’s…… not back yet?”

Ling Long’s brows immediately furrowed. His voice turned cold, “Where exactly did you two go?”

Helian Kong looked at Ling Long’s face— so dark it could merge with the night— and whispered, “We…… went to Chen Manor……”

Ling Long stared at him in silence. Helian Kong could almost see the cold aura emanating from him.

“Where is Yinyin?” Ling Long asked again.

Helian Kong was so scared his voice trembled, “We…… ran into Yidi Hua…… and got separated……”

There was silence. Helian Kong wanted to speak up, to explain, and to comfort Ling Long. But he dared not utter a single word.

Because he felt it in his bones that if he said one more word, it might be his last.