Chapter 24: Even if he’s an idiot, the others…

The livestream hadn’t started yet, and Shang Que was enjoying the feeling of being emperor with a clear conscience. After all, Ji Jingchuan still had to be her servant for 1,236 days, so it wouldn’t hurt to start getting used to it now.

Besides, with his prideful personality, he definitely wouldn’t go crazy in public. That meant she didn’t have to suffer any social death—it was practically risk-free.

Not long after, the fixed camera in the house turned on. Jiang Yizhe came downstairs and appeared in the living room. Seeing the two of them sitting at the dining table, he asked in surprise, “Why are you up so early?”

Ji Jingchuan replied with a straight face, “I’ve always said that self-discipline is one of the most insignificant traits of a genius. I usually get up at this time.”

The biggest advantage of Ji Jingchuan’s boundless energy was that, even after pulling an all-nighter playing cards, his face didn’t show a single trace of fatigue—let alone dark circles—so Jiang Yizhe easily believed his lie.

“Oh right, Sister Shang Que, didn’t you post on your Moments that you couldn’t get the garlic baguette from that shop in the south of the city? I happened to pass by there yesterday, so I brought one for you. But I was in a bit of a rush and didn’t have time to ask them to slice it.”

As he spoke, Jiang Yizhe handed over the paper bag he was carrying. Shang Que was surprised and thanked him. Just as she was about to take it, a hand suddenly reached out and blocked between the two of them.

“Hold on,” Ji Jingchuan said, fully alert, “Anything meant for the emperor must be tested for poison by me before being presented.”

Shang Que: “?”

Jiang Yizhe: “Huh?”

【???】

【When did Shang Que become the emperor? When was the coronation? Why weren’t we, the commoners, informed?】

【Wait a second, isn’t poison testing something eunuchs do? Ji Jingchuan, you…?】

【I suspect he just wants to eat it.】

Without giving anyone a chance to object, Ji Jingchuan snatched the paper bag, pulled out the baguette, tore open the packaging in a few quick moves, and started gnawing on it dry.

The baguette hadn’t been sliced. It was about the length of a forearm, baked to a golden, crispy finish, with a layer of finely chopped green parsley sprinkled on top. As soon as it came out, it released a strong aroma of garlic and butter.

It tasted great, but since it had been left out overnight, it was a bit dry. Ji Jingchuan nearly choked on it. He forced it down and handed the remaining half to Shang Que. “Your servant has tested it—no poison, Your Majesty may now dine!”

“……” Looking at the baguette that looked like it had been chewed on by a dog, Shang Que was honestly disgusted, but since it had been a thoughtful gift, she couldn’t bring herself to say anything.

“Why don’t you just eat the whole thing? I’ll bring another one for Sister Shang Que next time I pass by,” Jiang Yizhe said, not taking it to heart. Instead, he asked curiously, “By the way, why are you calling yourself a servant?”

“Because Shang Que is the emperor, of course.”

“Ji Jingchuan.” Shang Que gave a warning with a blank expression.

Ji Jingchuan showed no fear and loudly said, “Your Majesty, do you have any commands?”

“……”

Shang Que just wanted him to shut up.

At that moment, Jiang Yizhe also got curious. “Is today’s variety show segment a role-play? Then who am I?”

“You?” Ji Jingchuan thought for a second, then conferred a title. “You’ll be the chef from the imperial kitchen. Still a servant. Only Shang Que is the emperor.”

“Got it? If so, join me in paying respects to the emperor.”

“Alright!” Jiang Yizhe agreed cheerfully.

Then the two of them turned in unison and shouted at the top of their lungs, “Greetings to Your Majesty! Long live the emperor! Long live! Long live!”

Shang Que: ……

Two idiots.

Their antics caught the attention of Ning Sheng from afar. She asked curiously, “What are you guys doing?”

Shang Que answered without hesitation, “Going crazy.”

Ning Sheng looked at the other two and wasn’t surprised. A husky and a golden retriever hanging out together—it wouldn’t be surprising if they did something weird.

She then turned to Shang Que and stated her purpose. “By the way, Shang Que, I’ve been reviewing the drama we acted in recently. While re-reading the script, there were a few parts I didn’t quite understand. I marked them—could you take a look for me when you have time?”

Ning Sheng had recently fallen out with her company, and Leyu directly cut off most of her resources. Aside from this variety show that was currently being filmed, she had no other appearances scheduled. But she was tough. When she didn’t have any acting jobs, she reviewed and summarized, honing her acting skills.

The livestream audience was well aware of the situation, and the comment section was immediately filled with criticism.

【Can this heartless company give Ning Sheng a break? Don’t they know how much money they made off her over the past few years? Now they want to promote a newcomer and just kick her aside?】

【My girl’s situation is seriously tragic. If it weren’t for being stuck with Leyu, she would’ve already won countless awards.】

【Of course she can terminate the contract. We believe in Sheng Sheng! Just the night before last, she even reassured us in the fan group.】

“Sure,” Shang Que said cheerfully, happy to help. Seeing Ning Sheng holding a script, she reached out to take it.

But in the next second, Ji Jingchuan intercepted it midway. “How can a minister directly hand the memorial to the emperor?” He took the script and presented it with both hands to Shang Que. “Your Majesty, please review it!”

Ning Sheng was momentarily stunned. “What’s this now?”

Jiang Yizhe immediately offered a warm explanation, “Role-playing game, Sister Ning Sheng.”

Ning Sheng couldn’t help but laugh. “Then who am I?”

Ji Jingchuan, already very familiar with this kind of thing, said smoothly, “Minister of Rites. You seem quite polite.”

【Then since I work 996 like a corporate slave, can I be made Minister of Personnel?】

【Going to work every day feels like torture. I’m the Minister of Justice.】

【Hahaha you guys really get the essence of this!】

Thanks to these two jokesters, Ning Sheng’s previously stifled mood had lightened considerably, and she readily accepted her new title.

Then the three of them bowed together, saying, “Greetings, Your Majesty! Long live the Emperor! Long live the Emperor, may you live ten thousand years!”

Shang Que: …

Three idiots.

But it didn’t end there—two more people arrived and also received titles.

Lin Jinyi made a request, “I’ve got an idol image to uphold. I don’t want to be a maid.”

That was no trouble for Ji Jingchuan. He immediately said, “Then you can sell burdens instead. I’ll title you as Imperial Merchant.”

As for Lu Zhixu—

“What about me?” he asked with a smile.

“You’re pretty smart, so…” Ji Jingchuan suddenly remembered that Shang Que had just mentioned wanting to be paired with Lu Zhixu, and his expression changed as he amended, “Exiled to the frontier.”

【Hahaha why does being smart mean exile? Are they afraid he’ll usurp the throne?】

【Feels more like Ji Jingchuan is the one likely to usurp the throne. He’s already sidelining the emperor.】

【Sounds like a personal grudge.】

Lu Zhixu raised his eyebrows in surprise. He didn’t seem to understand what he had done to offend him.

Ji Jingchuan maintained a straight face and corrected himself, “I misspoke. I meant assigned to guard the border, unless I issue a decree stating he can never return to the capital.”

Stay obediently far away from Shang Que. Smarter than him? How could anyone be smarter than this genius?

With everyone now titled, the Great Shang Dynasty was officially established. By the time the director arrived, they had already seated themselves according to their assigned closeness and status.

Lu Zhixu sat the farthest away, while the one closest to Shang Que was, unsurprisingly, Ji Jingchuan, her “imperial eunuch.”

The director didn’t notice anything unusual. Once the livestream officially began, he explained the partner-switching segment: “This morning we interviewed each guest one-on-one, asking them to choose again ‘who they most want to be friends with.’ The answers will remain confidential for now. After today’s activity, if you still want to change partners—and if the other person also agrees to be your friend—you’ll be allowed to change your current groupings.”

【Everything was going great, why suddenly switch partners?】

【Yeah, I’ve already gotten used to seeing them paired up like this.】

【Don’t tell me Shang Que and Ji Jingchuan are going to switch? I remember during the outdoor camping episode, Shang Que said she liked quiet people. Could it be she thinks Ji Jingchuan is too noisy?】

【Actually, I feel like there’s something off between Ning Sheng and Lu Zhixu too, like a couple that just had a fight.】

No one was surprised. The director continued, “Since yesterday’s escape room was a bit intense, today’s mission will be much more relaxed. A one-day trip to the children’s amusement park!”

“Children’s amusement park?” Jiang Yizhe asked curiously. “Are we going there to have fun?”

Lu Zhixu countered, “Do you think any of us are still children?”

Shang Que commented dryly, “If we’re talking about psychological age, then about half of us are.”

【This reminds me of the time those three argued about who was the elementary schooler. No need to argue anymore—you all are!】

“It’s not for fun,” the director explained. “You’ll be experiencing what it’s like to be a staff member. The amusement park has a float parade. Today you won’t act in groups—you’ll all cooperate to complete one parade together. As for the theme, you’ll need to do your own research.”

“The kids will vote afterward for their favorite character, and the person with the most votes will be able to choose anyone they like as their new partner in the regrouping.”

Everyone understood the rules. They exchanged glances and then set off for the amusement park. The tour bus was also decorated in a fun, childlike style, with balloons and stuffed toys, and the small screen was playing cartoons.

【Even buses are getting turned into anime vans these days.】

【Wow! Feels like I’ve traveled back to childhood!】

【Your childhood and mine must’ve been different.】

【Same here. I don’t recognize half of these cartoon characters.】

Fortunately, they were playing the familiar Tom and Jerry, and everyone watched intently the whole way. Occasionally, Jiang Yizhe would share stories from his childhood, and the travel time passed quickly.

This episode took place at the largest outdoor children’s amusement park in Jinghai. With sandpits, rocking horses, slides, and brightly colored cartoon houses, the whole place was filled with a sense of childhood wonder.

By now, the park had already been open for a while, and many children were clustered together playing. The group stopped in front of a pink castle, where a staff member dressed as Snow White explained the float parade details.

There were four parades daily at the amusement park. They were responsible for the one in the afternoon. However, since makeup and rehearsal were still needed, there wasn’t much time to prepare.

Once the staff member left, they immediately began researching by interviewing nearby children.

Lin Jinyi blended in perfectly with the little girls taking photos with Elsa. She had been collecting Barbie dolls since she was a child, and she used that as a topic to connect with them. Before long, a group of little girls surrounded her, enthusiastically discussing which Barbie in the photo album was which princess.

Jiang Yizhe, who had a younger sister in elementary school, was an expert in all the latest cartoons. He chatted fluently with the children, while Ning Sheng stood nearby, completely lost.

“What is he talking about? Did we ever watch these shows as kids?”

Lu Zhixu was also confused. “My memory of cartoons stops at Nezha Conquers the Dragon King and Journey to the West.”

Shang Que was even more clueless. “I moved abroad when I was eight. I think back then, the popular show was Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf.”

“Oh my god,” Ning Sheng was shocked. “Lu Zhixu and I are only five or six years older than them. Why does it feel like we can’t relate at all?”

【That’s like two generation gaps.】

【Cartoons update so fast now. Sometimes I can’t even understand what my little sister is talking about.】

【Same here. The words they use feel so foreign.】

“By the way, where’s Ji Jingchuan?”

After Ning Sheng brought it up, they realized he wasn’t nearby. Shang Que frowned. “I’ll go look for him.”

She couldn’t understand anything anyway while staying here.

Shang Que wandered around and saw him at the sandbox playing marbles. Ji Jingchuan looked like a little king surrounded by children, each successful hit earning him a chorus of cheers.

His face radiated genuine joy and smugness, completely blending in with the group of kids.

Shang Que stood quietly at a distance, watching for a while, then turned and walked away.

“Alright, alright, I’m done playing!” Ji Jingchuan called out loudly. “You guys are too weak. I’ve nearly won all the marbles!”

“There’s still one more!” the kid he was playing against refused to back down. “Let’s play one more round, I’ll definitely beat you this time!”

Another chimed in, “Yeah! He’s the best marble player around here.”

“Well, then your standards aren’t that high,” Ji Jingchuan boasted. “I was undefeated in kindergarten when I was four. You need more practice, kiddo.”

He kept the most beautiful marble he won and distributed the rest among the kids. Then he waved them over. “Come on, I’ll teach you a new game.”

“What game, boss?”

Ji Jingchuan replied, “The game of an emperor ascending the throne.”

*

Although the float parade was scheduled for the afternoon, preparations began right after lunch.

The theme—Chinese style—was decided by Ji Jingchuan and approved unanimously by the others.

Shang Que didn’t think much of it at first. She figured that among all the floats filled with foreign IPs, a Chinese-themed one would probably stand out.

But when the staff brought the dragon robe in front of her, she instantly blacked out.

Shang Que: ?

“Chinese style, luxurious, rich in layers, steeped in history.” Shang Que looked at them and slowly asked, “This is what you meant?”

“What’s wrong with it?” Ji Jingchuan replied righteously.

Jiang Yizhe scratched his head. “It really is Chinese palace style.”

Lin Jinyi was also pleased with the outfit she wore. “The craftsmanship is definitely luxurious. Look at this embroidery—it’s clearly handmade.”

Lu Zhixu nodded. “From the emperor to the eunuch, and then to me—the exile to the frontier—how’s that not rich in layers?”

Ning Sheng curved her eyes. “And I don’t even need to explain the ‘steeped in history’ part, right?”

Shang Que: …

Five idiots.

【I’m dying, did Shang Que just bare her teeth? I swear she wanted to curse them out.】

【I knew Ji Jingchuan was acting weird all day. He was definitely up to something.】

【Did he lose a bet with Shang Que and have to call himself a servant, and now he’s plotting revenge?】

【LOL that’s totally something he’d do.】

But with only half an hour left until the parade and her makeup already done, Shang Que eventually changed into the heavy, ornate dragon robe—so as not to ruin the fun for the children.

When she stepped out, she happened to run into Ji Jingchuan at the door. He was wearing a flying fish robe and holding a Xiu Chun Dao sword. Leaning coolly against the wall with his arms crossed, his long hair was tied high with a crown, dressed in red—full of youthful arrogance.

【Ji Jingchuan, just don’t speak. That face alone could bring you a lifetime of wealth and glory.】

【I’m okay with him as a silent pretty boy. But if he opens his mouth, give him a silken noose.】

【Honestly, Shang Que looks like a true empress in that dragon robe.】

Shang Que frowned. “Why are you wearing a flying fish robe? Aren’t you supposed to be the head eunuch?”

“Says who?” Ji Jingchuan raised his eyebrows. “The imperial guards also refer to themselves as ‘this servant.’”

He twirled the decorative sword. “So, Shang Que, how do I look? I just learned this—cool or not?”

Shang Que looked unimpressed, took the sword from him, weighed it—it was light, clearly just a prop. She adjusted to it slightly, then casually twirled it in a beautiful flourish. Compared to Ji Jingchuan’s earlier move, hers was several hundred times more elegant and professional.

【So cool!!!】

【Isn’t there a rumor that Shang Que accepted a wuxia drama role? I’m suddenly looking forward to it!】

Soon the others also finished their preparations and, under the guidance of the amusement park staff, boarded the imperial-yellow float.

With the majestic music playing, it somehow gave off the vibe of an emperor’s enthronement ceremony.

Children on both sides of the road excitedly waved at the float. The others waved back happily, while Shang Que remained motionless in the center, maintaining an imperial air.

Just then, Ji Jingchuan suddenly approached, leaned down close to her ear, and loudly said, “Your Majesty, this servant has prepared a surprise for you!”

A bad feeling instantly rose in Shang Que’s heart.

The next second, the children on both sides of the road suddenly dropped to their knees with a whoosh and shouted in unison, “Long live the Emperor! Long live! Long live forever!”

Shang Que: ?

【HAHAHAHAHAHA!】

【Who did this? I almost laughed myself unconscious.】

【Shang Que: I’ve never been this socially dead in my life.】

The float parade ended smoothly, and everyone returned to the villa. The director was tallying everyone’s votes.

Ji Jingchuan suddenly leaned over. “Shang Que.”

She ignored him and turned her head away.

So he kept calling her name: “Shang Que, Shang Que, Shang Que?”

“What?”

“I have a surprise for you.”

At this point, the word “surprise” gave Shang Que immediate anxiety. Without thinking, she rejected him. “No.”

“It’s not that kind of surprise.” Ji Jingchuan pulled a marble out of his pocket and offered it like a treasure. “Here, I won this from those kids. It’s the prettiest one.”

Shang Que examined it. The marble shimmered with colorful light in the center, like a dazzling little gem.

She turned to him. Ji Jingchuan’s eyebrows were slightly raised, his expression exactly the same as when he used to win marbles in kindergarten and proudly gifted one to her.

He said, “There’s one more surprise.”

“What is it?”

Just then, the director finished tallying the votes and suddenly announced, “The guest most loved by the children is—Shang Que!”

Shang Que froze and turned to Ji Jingchuan. He was clapping enthusiastically, looking completely unsurprised. Clearly, this was the surprise he meant.

“So now Shang Que may choose a new partner. Who would you like to switch to?”

The applause stopped. Ji Jingchuan looked at her with hopeful eyes. As if saying: Pick me, Shang Que. Shang Que, pick me!

But if he didn’t want her to switch, couldn’t he have just asked the kids to vote for himself?

In the end, though, he still left the decision to her. Shang Que closed her eyes for a moment, then opened them and said coldly, “What’s there to switch? He’s an idiot, but the others aren’t much better.”