Yu Ju was forcing himself to stay awake in class.

The teacher’s chalk tapped against the blackboard as they wrote out equations, the uneven rhythm resembling a lullaby with no melody. Yu Ju half-squinted at the answers on his scratch paper, staring soullessly at them.

After getting home last night, he couldn’t fall asleep. He lay in bed for over half an hour, feeling like he was wasting time, so he got up and started reading instead.

By the time the sky turned pale, he washed up, grabbed something to eat, and headed to class.

Suddenly, his pocket vibrated. Yu Ju’s mind stalled for a moment, his nearly shut eyes snapping open.

His pen had already fallen onto the desk. He had no idea how long he had dozed off, but when he looked up, the teacher had already filled the next section of the blackboard.

The message was from Zhao Yi.

[Awake?] he asked.

Yu Ju opened his camera and took a picture of the blackboard, sending it to him.

Zhao Yi replied, [Class this early, huh?]

Yu Ju: [I’m exhausted.]

Zhao Yi: [Didn’t get much sleep last night?]

Yu Ju: [Yeah.]

Yu Ju: [Only slept for four hours.]

It was only then that Yu Ju remembered—he hadn’t told Zhao Yi when he got back to the apartment yesterday.

Not that it really mattered. He hadn’t arrived until past three in the morning.

Zhao Yi: [Did you know I called you last night?]

Yu Ju paused for a moment. [You called me?]

After sending the message, he opened his call log. Sure enough, the most recent call was from Zhao Yi, at around 1 a.m.

But it wasn’t a missed call. The call duration was ten seconds.

Zhao Yi’s message popped up on the screen. [Yeah, Gu Qianxing picked up.]

Yu Ju raised an eyebrow.

Right after, Zhao Yi asked, [Did you two sleep together last night?]

“Pfft—cough, cough, cough!“

Yu Ju suddenly choked on his own saliva.

The classroom was way too quiet, making his outburst painfully noticeable. Heads turned one after another, all eyes landing on him.

He gave an apologetic look and quickly lowered his head.

Yu Ju: [??]

Yu Ju: [How is that even possible!]

Zhao Yi: [Phew, you scared me for a second.]

Zhao Yi: [Then why were you still at his place past one? And you even fell asleep there.]

Yu Ju: [What did you two talk about on the call?]

Zhao Yi: [Nothing much. I noticed you never told me you got home, so I called you. Didn’t expect Gu Qianxing to pick up. His voice was super quiet—he just said you were asleep.]

Yu Ju pressed his lips into a thin line.

That was exactly what happened, but the way Zhao Yi described it made it sound weird.

Zhao Yi kept going. [Why were you still at his place past one, though? And actually sleeping there?]

Zhao Yi: [So you didn’t go home on your own last night! Gu Qianxing took you back!]

Zhao Yi: [I knew it! The moment you left, he left too—so he was actually taking you home.]

There was no way Yu Ju could explain that he’d fallen asleep in Gu Qianxing’s car until three in the morning. So he just went with the easiest answer.

Yu Ju: [No, he was just heading home too. It was on the way.]

Zhao Yi: [His place is definitely not on the way to yours.]

Yu Ju: [……]

Yu Ju: [So even if he went out of his way to give me a ride, is there a problem?]

Zhao Yi burst out laughing on the other end. [No problem, no problem.]

Zhao Yi: [Don’t get mad, don’t get mad.]           

Zhao Yi: [I know, I know—you’re straight, I know.]

Yu Ju: [Kneel and take your leave.]

Zhao Yi: [Got it.]

Yu Ju had known Zhao Yi for nearly six years and was long used to his antics.

Back in the day, if a pretty girl so much as approached Yu Ju, Zhao Yi would be the loudest instigator, practically wishing for Yu Ju to get into a relationship the next day, kiss on the third, and end up in bed by the fourth.

Ever since Zhao Yi came out to Yu Ju and Yu Ju barely reacted, it wasn’t just pretty girls—whenever a handsome guy got close to Yu Ju, Zhao Yi would hype it up even louder.

A few seconds later, Zhao Yi was back. [One last question.]

Yu Ju: [Not interested. Get lost.]

Zhao Yi: [Hahaha, no, listen—]

Zhao Yi: [Hey, what do you think—]

Yu Ju stared at the screen. Wow. This bastard sent half a sentence and then just stopped talking.

Yu Ju: “……”

Thanks to Zhao Yi’s antics, he was now fully awake. He looked up and saw that the teacher had already filled another board with notes.

For the first time in his life, Yu Ju was waiting for Zhao Yi’s message.

But, of course, he couldn’t let Zhao Yi know he was waiting.

Pure agony.

After tapping his screen eight times, Yu Ju finally saw Zhao Yi’s message pop up.

Zhao Yi: [What was I about to say? Picked up a call and totally forgot.]

Yu Ju clenched his fist.

Zhao Yi: [Oh, oh, oh—]

Zhao Yi: [Hey, tell me—does Gu Qianxing like you?]

Yu Ju blinked lightly.

Yu Ju: [That’s hilarious.]

Yu Ju: [No way.]

He kept staring at the screen, wondering if Zhao Yi would follow up with—Hey, then do you like Gu Qianxing?

But Zhao Yi didn’t ask.

Instead, he said, [Hey, so how did you two meet, anyway?]

Zhao Yi: [Got a story there?]

Yu Ju: [No story.]

Yu Ju: [Just ran into him a few times at a friend’s place during the summer before senior year.]

Yu Ju: [That’s it.]

Zhao Yi: [So boring.]

After that, Zhao Yi didn’t say anything else.

Yu Ju waited a few dozen seconds, making sure Zhao Yi wasn’t going to send another message before finally locking his phone.

Then, he looked at the blackboard covered in chalk and… laughed.

Kinda messed up. On one hand, he was looking forward to talking about Gu Qianxing, but on the other, his attitude was like, I don’t really want to talk about him with you.

Picking up his pen, Yu Ju’s mind was suddenly hit again with what Xiao Chen had said yesterday.

Didn’t have the heart to wake you.

Stayed with you the whole time.

Even gave you his jacket.

Yu Ju’s head started to ache. Two nights in a row of barely any sleep had tanked his ability to think straight. He wasn’t even sure what was running through his head anymore, and somehow, even the simple equation “35 – 19” on his notebook was taking way too long to solve. Was it 14? 26? 16?

In the end, he wrote down 16 and moved on. Then, as if on instinct, he picked up his phone and opened Zhao Yi’s WeChat.

Yu Ju: [What were you trying to tell me yesterday at the bar?]

Yu Ju: [Before that guy singing interrupted you.]

Zhao Yi: [Ohhh! Oh, right!]

Yu Ju pressed his lips together, watching as Zhao Yi’s typing bubble appeared. Waiting.

Zhao Yi: [I just wanted to tell you to be careful around Zhou Jinye’s circle of rich boys.]

Zhao Yi: [Like, yeah, he’s my boyfriend, but I still know what a flirt he is. And I’ve heard a thing or two about his friends.]

Zhao Yi: [Straight or not, a lot of them are total scumbags!]

Zhao Yi: [Take that guy who interrupted our singing yesterday—Frog. Dude’s literally dating two people at once right now.]

Zhao Yi: [Men get money, and they start throwing it around. You remember how I met Zhou Jinye, right? It was a hookup.]

Yu Ju: [Then why don’t you break up?]

Zhao Yi: [Well—]

Zhao Yi: [He’s good in bed.]

Zhao Yi: [You wouldn’t get it. So much better than my ex!]

Yu Ju: [I really don’t want to know…]

Zhao Yi: [Ah, whatever. He’s been fine after we got together, hasn’t done anything outrageous. We’re just going with the flow—nothing good, nothing bad.]

Yu Ju looked puzzled. [Aren’t you two usually pretty affectionate?]

Yu Ju: [You seem like the type who’d stay together forever, never separating.]

Zhao Yi: [Please, that’s hilarious. We’re not even sure if we’ll make it past June 1st.]

Zhao Yi: [Ugh, people can fake this kind of thing, you know.]

Zhao Yi: [Seriously, you’re just too naive!]

Yu Ju lowered his head and started typing: “So you’re telling me all this because you’re afraid Gu Qianxing will fool me?”

After a moment of thought, he changed it to:

Yu Ju: [So you’re afraid someone will fool me?]

Zhao Yi: [I guess so.]

Zhao Yi: [But after thinking about it, there’s really nothing much to say.]

Zhao Yi: [You don’t seem to have any feelings for Gu Qianxing. If you hadn’t just told me there’s nothing between you two, I would’ve thought you disliked him.]

Yu Ju was momentarily stunned.

Yu Ju: [I dislike him?]

Zhao Yi: [Yeah.]

Zhao Yi: [Well, not exactly.]

Zhao Yi: [How should I put it… It feels like you’re afraid to talk to him, like you don’t want to have anything to do with him.]

Yu Ju raised an eyebrow.

He thought of what Gu Qianxing had said yesterday.

Yu Ju: [Resist?]

Zhao Yi: [Yes, yes, you resist him.]

Yu Ju paused for a moment.

Yu Ju: [I don’t dislike him, and I don’t resist him either.]

Yu Ju: [I was probably just too tired yesterday, so I didn’t feel like talking.]

Casually, he pulled an excuse out of thin air: [I was in the lab until 4 AM the night before.]

Zhao Yi: [Classic you.]

Zhao Yi: [Forget it, there’s nothing for me to worry about anyway. You have an even stronger sense of boundaries than I do—why would I even need to worry about you?]

Zhao Yi: [All you care about is making money and studying. What else could possibly interest you?]

Yu Ju felt a little guilty. He touched the leaf-shaped necklace hanging around his neck, unsure if he could really agree with that statement.

Zhao Yi: [Besides, you’re straight, and Gu Qianxing is straight too.]

Zhao Yi: [So there’s really nothing more to say.]

Yu Ju’s thumb twitched slightly, as if his thoughts suddenly hit a snag.

Yu Ju: [How do you know?]

Yu Ju: [Does he have a girlfriend?]

Zhao Yi: [That, I don’t know.]

Zhao Yi: [But yesterday, I saw you two interacting pretty sweetly, so I asked Zhou Jinye about Gu Qianxing’s orientation.]

Zhao Yi: [Zhou Jinye said that back in school, a lot of handsome guys confessed to him, but Gu Qianxing always said he was straight.]

Yu Ju: [No girls ever confessed to him?]

Zhao Yi: [I didn’t ask!]

Zhao Yi: [Oh, that’s right!]

Zhao Yi: [So after thinking about it, I figured that maybe I found your interactions sweet because I was seeing things through a fujoshi lens.]

Yu Ju: [It’s not the first time.]

Zhao Yi: [Ahehe.]

This time, Zhao Yi really didn’t send any more messages.

Not long after, the class bell rang.

Yu Ju didn’t leave immediately. After double-checking everything on the blackboard, he picked up his phone again and reread his chat with Zhao Yi.

For some reason, a faint sense of disappointment settled in.

It had been less than 24 hours since he ran into Gu Qianxing at the HIC event yesterday at noon.

Within this one day, it felt like so much had happened—yet at the same time, nothing had happened at all.

Yu Ju opened Gu Qianxing’s WeChat. Their conversation was still stuck at the initial exchange of greetings.

Since they parted ways yesterday, Gu Qianxing hadn’t reached out to him, nor had he reached out to Gu Qianxing.

Yu Ju tapped on the profile picture, then clicked on the three dots in the top right corner and pressed Delete.

But when the confirmation prompt popped up on the screen, he hesitated.

It seemed like he could do it.

But there was no need to.

Even though the past had been brought up, it had nothing to do with Gu Qianxing.

It was all his own problem.

In the end, he chose Cancel, then backed out of the chat and deleted the conversation from his messages, making sure it wouldn’t linger on his chat list.

He had plenty of reasons to treat Gu Qianxing as a stranger.

But as for reasons to be his friend—aside from that fleeting excitement of youth—there wasn’t a single one.