Chapter 5: A Heart That Protects

Hearing her words, Xie Yurong froze.

After a long while, he finally said,

“Wei’er, you’ve misunderstood. I truly wanted to be engaged to you. No one forced me.”

Su Yanwei looked at him, neither saying she believed nor disbelieved him.

“You’ve always been different from everyone else,” Xie Yurong continued earnestly, looking straight at her.
“You have your own wishes and aspirations. I want to guard you to support every choice you make.”

“I want to protect you.”

This time, it was Su Yanwei who was stunned.

Xie Yurong looked at her and smiled.

“When we were little, you were terribly ill, but you still smiled at me and comforted me, telling me not to be afraid. At that moment, I thought you’re so strong.”

That was the first time he and Su Yanwei met.

Young Xie Yurong had been brought to the Su residence by his father, Xie Muchun, who came to visit Su Jinting and his wife, Ye Qingmeng. Xie Yurong had been taken along as a playmate for Su Yanwei. At that time, Su Yanwei was very sick, her illness flaring up repeatedly. When it was bad, she could only lie in bed all day, her face deathly pale, her breathing faint, as fragile as a porcelain doll that could shatter at any moment.

The first time Xie Yurong saw her, she was having an episode. She lay quietly on her bed, the windows tightly shut, the room dim, filled with the thick, bitter scent of medicine. When he looked up, he saw Su Yanwei leaning weakly on the bed. At first glance, all he saw was white, she was so pale, like a snowflake that might melt and vanish in the next breath.

He had never seen anyone like her before, and stood frozen.

Su Yanwei lifted her eyes, turning her head slightly to look at him.

“Could you open the window for me?”

That was the first thing she ever said to Xie Yurong.

Startled to be addressed, he felt nervous but still firmly refused.

“You’re, sick. If I open the window, you’ll catch a chill.”

“But the jade qiong flowers in the courtyard are about to wither,” she said, her pale little face full of regret. “It’s going to rain tonight, and after the rain, those beautiful flowers will be destroyed by the wind and rain.”

“The flowering period for jade qiong is very short, only about ten days once a year. If I miss this time, I’ll have to wait until next year.”

“…And I don’t even know if I’ll live to see next year.”

Seeing the sorrow and unwillingness on her face, something struck Xie Yurong’s heart sharply.

“I’ll help you!”

By the time he realized it, the words had already slipped out.

“Really?” The girl who had looked so despondent just moments before suddenly brightened. Her dark, pretty eyes looked at him, and a smile bloomed on her pale face.
“Thank you so much!”

“……”

Looking at the bright smile on her face, it was too late for Xie Yurong to take back his words.

But seeing her smile… it really was worth it.

Just moments ago, she had looked as fragile as a drifting snowflake, ready to vanish at any moment.

Xie Yurong stepped forward and opened the window. A breeze, chilly with the lingering cold of early spring, blew in. The fresh outdoor air diluted the thick medicinal scent in the room. Outside, he saw the blooming jade qiong flowers: pink, white, red…

In full bloom, beautiful beyond words.

“So beautiful,”

He heard the girl behind him sigh softly.

“Next spring, they’ll bloom again, won’t they?”

“To see the flowers next year,” she said with a smile, “I must stay strong and live until next spring!”

Watching the clear, bright, and purely joyful smile on her face, he wondered, how could someone like this exist?

He thought, Just to see the flowers bloom next year, she endures the pain and suffering, year after year.

“Cough, cough…” Su Yanwei suddenly coughed, covering her mouth with a handkerchief. Soon, the pristine white cloth was stained bright red with blood. Her lips were as crimson as the jade qiong flowers outside.

Suppressing the discomfort in her throat, Su Yanwei raised her eyes to see Xie Yurong standing there, staring at her, frozen.

“What’s wrong? Did I scare you?” she asked softly, trying to comfort him.
“Don’t be afraid, it doesn’t hurt that much. It just feels a little uncomfortable.”

Xie Yurong looked at her, moving his lips as if to speak, but in the end, said nothing.

He had wanted to ask, Does it really not hurt? If it didn’t, why were her hands clutching the bedsheets so tightly?

That night, as she had said, there really was a violent storm. The wind and rain battered the fragile jade qiong flowers until they lay scattered on the ground, petals buried in the mud.

Inside, Su Yanwei developed a high fever, her illness worsening dangerously.

She burned with fever for days, several times close to death.

On the day her condition became critical, Xie Yurong stood in the courtyard, looking at the fallen petals and leaves, listening to the commotion inside as people hurried back and forth. His heart felt heavy, overwhelmed by emotions he couldn’t put into words.

He remembered what she had said the day before:

“They’re so beautiful… I hope I can see them bloom next year too.”

At that moment, he prayed sincerely, wholeheartedly, that she would survive and see the jade qiong flowers bloom every year.

The way she had looked at those blossoms from the window… it could soften even the coldest heart. No one could remain unmoved.

From that day on, a wish took root in Xie Yurong’s heart: to protect Su Yanwei.

He wanted her to see the jade qiong flowers bloom every year.

He wanted her face to always carry that simple, pure, and radiant smile.

“…When I heard you were going to be married,” Xie Yurong said seriously, “I thought, why couldn’t that person be me? If it were me, I would never let you be sad. I wouldn’t let you get hurt.”

“……”

Su Yanwei hadn’t expected that to be what he was thinking.

But, she thought inwardly, This, isn’t right.

Xie Yurong’s feelings are mixed up; he can’t even clearly distinguish them himself. His desire to protect is too strong, it isn’t truly love.

“I understand how you feel,” Su Yanwei said, “but I still can’t agree.”

Xie Yurong frowned.

“Why?”

He looked at her, puzzled.

“I thought I’d made it clear. No one forced me.”

“Because this isn’t love,” Su Yanwei said plainly.
“This is just a shadow from your childhood. You don’t actually want to marry me you just want to be my guardian.”

“Allow me to refuse!”

The way Xie Yurong looked at her was as if she were being unreasonable.

“Just that reason isn’t enough to convince me.”

Su Yanwei sighed inwardly.

He really is stubborn won’t stop until he hits a wall.

“Then let me give you an example,” she said. “Right now, you’re engaged to me. But what if, in the future, you meet someone you truly love? What then? Between her and me, someone would inevitably be hurt, what would you choose?”