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“Xiao Yudie!”
Zhuang Zi’ang jolted awake from a nightmare, his eyes snapping open to a world of white.
White sheets, white pillows, a white ceiling.
The sharp scent of disinfectant filled the air, mingling with the rhythmic ticking of medical equipment.
“Zhuang Zi’ang, you’re awake.” Lin Mu Shi’s voice carried a hint of relief as she stood by his bedside.
Memories rushed back—Zhuang Wen Zhao had kicked him at the school gate, sending him into unconsciousness. Lin Mu Shi had brought him to the hospital.
“Thank you, Mu Shi,” he said sincerely.
Lin Mu Shi shook her head. “It’s nothing. You’ve always treated me well; this is the least I can do. I was too willful before… I’m sorry.”
The usually proud school beauty spoke with uncharacteristic gentleness, making Zhuang Zi’ang a little uncomfortable.
She had already decided to repay him however she could in his remaining days. As the daughter of a wealthy family, she had covered his medical expenses without hesitation.
“How long was I out?” He glanced toward the darkened window.
“About two hours.”
“Are you hungry? I can get you something to eat,” she offered.
Zhuang Zi’ang lifted his arm, noticing the IV drip. “When will this be done? I want to go home.”
Lin Mu Shi hesitated. “The doctor said you need to stay for at least three days under observation.”
“What’s the point? It won’t change anything.”
Frustration surged through him. He wanted to pull out the IV and leave.
Lin Mu Shi saw through his thoughts and urged him not to be reckless. “Just cooperate with the treatment.”
Zhuang Zi’ang sighed. “Then… can you do me a favor?”
Lin Mu Shi nodded without hesitation. “Of course.”
He pointed to his pocket. “My apartment key. There are two goldfish there—please take care of them. When I get out, I’ll take them back. If I can’t…” His voice caught in his throat.
Tears welled in Lin Mu Shi’s eyes. “You’re thinking about fish at a time like this?”
“They were a gift from Xiao Yudie. I can’t let them die. If I don’t make it back, take them to Class 23 in the west campus and return them to her.” His tone was heavy, as if making a final request.
Lin Mu Shi’s expression darkened. “So you really don’t plan to see her again?”
“If she sees me like this, it’ll break her heart. I just want her to be happy.”
Li Huang Xuan’s words had cut deep.
A love without a future…
If there was no way forward, then he couldn’t allow himself to sink deeper.
Weakness weighed on Zhuang Zi’ang. Even speaking drained his energy.
After taking his key and confirming the address, Lin Mu Shi wiped her tears and left.
From Zhuang Zi’ang, she had learned something new.
She had always believed love was about possession. But true love, she now realized, was about selfless giving—being willing to endure suffering, so the other person wouldn’t have to.
After arriving at his rented apartment, she found it small but tidy. A wilted peach blossom sat in a Coke bottle on the windowsill. In the fish tank, two red goldfish swam lazily.
She changed the water, sprinkled in some food, then went to his bedroom to pack a few changes of clothes.
In the corner of his closet, she found a crumpled piece of paper.
Smoothing it out, she recognized it instantly—his hospital report.
The words “cancer cells have spread” glared back at her.
Her fingers trembled as she folded it back up, tucking it away for later.
On the way back to the hospital, she bought some food.
“Thank you, Mu Shi,” Zhuang Zi’ang said softly when she returned. “I never expected you to be here for me at a time like this.”
She smiled faintly. “Don’t mention it. We’re good friends, aren’t we?”
For the first time, she understood—there would never be romance between them. But she would stay by his side, as a friend.
“I’ve arranged for a nurse to watch over you tonight. Tomorrow, I’ll help you ask Teacher Zhang for leave and come see you after school.”
Zhuang Zi’ang nodded. “Only Teacher Zhang knows about my condition. Don’t tell anyone else. Especially not Xiao Yudie .” He forced a laugh. “It’s not cool for a guy to be crying.”
He was only temporarily hospitalized—he could hold on for a while longer.
When the final moment arrived, he would say his proper goodbyes.
That night, the nurse Lin Mu Shi hired—a man in his thirties—kept him company.
They chatted idly until the nurse dozed off. But Zhuang Zi’ang remained wide awake.
He was afraid that if he closed his eyes, he might never wake up again.
The next morning, Chen Dexiu, his doctor, came by, bringing a small gift—a branch of azaleas.
“Morning, young man. How are you feeling?”
“Bored to death,” Zhuang Zi’ang joked. “When can I leave?”
“A couple more days of observation.”
Zhuang Zi’ang smirked. “Since it can’t be cured, isn’t staying here just a waste of time?”
Doctor Chen Dexiu studied him. The boy was surprisingly optimistic.
“You remind me of another patient—just as cheerful. She once gave me peach blossoms.”
Zhuang Zi’ang stretched lazily. “A girl once told me, whether you’re happy or not, it’s still just a day. So why not be happy every day?”
Doctor Chen Dexiu chuckled, gave him a few more words of encouragement, and moved on.
Zhuang Zi’ang stared at the azalea flower on his bedside table.
The red petals brought a rare touch of warmth to the cold, sterile hospital room.
His gaze blurred as memories surfaced—
A mountaintop.
A girl’s laughter carried on the wind.
“Xiao Yudie… I miss you so much.”
I miss you. I really do.
But I keep it hidden.
I still stand on tiptoe, longing for you.
I still let memories swirl around me.
I still close my eyes and shed silent tears.
I still pretend it doesn’t matter.
I miss you. I really miss you.
But I deceive myself.
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