Chapter 4: The Third Time, It Was Juchen Who Asked Him Out…

In her past life, Juchen was proud and ambitious. She always hoped her parents would be proud of her, and she had once seen entering the palace as an honor. She never thought marriage held much value.

Even now, she still didn’t believe that marriage was a woman’s only way out. Compared to arranged marriages, she was glad she took the path of becoming a female official and encountered the one she truly loved.

And that man had taught her with his life that love meant not allowing the other person to suffer.

Her second sister had the favored concubine Lady Wu as her backing and need not worry about finding a good match.

Her third brother, adored by Li Ling, naturally had a clear path paved for him.

But her mother, in order to please her father, chose a much harder path for her.

After Li Ling left, Madam Wen seemed to feel a bit guilty. She held Juchen’s hand and comforted her:
“Mother asked you to enter the palace because I hoped you could hold your own and let your father see that daughters are not necessarily inferior to sons.”

When Juchen was born, Madam Wen struggled to conceive again. A fortune teller said Juchen’s fate was too dominant, suppressing any future sons. Only by sending her away could she bear a boy. It so happened that Princess Xianning wanted a girl to raise alongside Princess Xuyang and chose Juchen.

Even though Juchen was away from home for years, Madam Wen never conceived again. Eventually, Li Ling brought in Concubine Wu.

In her past life, Juchen thought her mother genuinely believed she could stand on her own. When she became the first woman to be exceptionally promoted to a fourth-rank official, Madam Wen proudly declared to others,
“Juchen is incredibly talented. Had she married early, how could she have achieved such a glorious career?”

But when Juchen began pursuing her ideals and clashed with her conservative father and other senior officials, her mother abandoned her and sided with Li Ling instead. She snapped at Juchen,
“You should’ve been married off long ago, then you wouldn’t be causing this political chaos and making your father angry!”

“Why weren’t you born a man? If you were, you wouldn’t be going against your father like this.”

It was then Juchen realized her mother had always resented her—for not being born a son.

The room’s brazier was still burning warmly. Madam Wen held her daughter’s hand and urged,
“That Luoxia Pavilion is full of fox-like women. Wu Shi and your second sister only know how to flatter your father. You must not be like them. As long as you make a name for yourself before the Empress Dowager, your father won’t belittle us.”

Juchen had always been proud. In the past, she’d respond resolutely,
“I will.”

But now, she seemed a bit absent-minded.

Madam Wen called her again, and she finally returned to herself.

Seeing the gloom in her daughter’s eyes, Madam Wen glanced at her book box and asked,
“What book did you read last night?”

Juchen paused and replied, “The Records of the Three Kingdoms.”
“I just read the part where Zhao Zilong rescues his lord.”

Madam Wen nodded approvingly.
“Three Kingdoms is a good book—full of strategy and tactics, the kind boys enjoy.”

Juchen wanted to say she liked it too—and that liking a book has nothing to do with gender—but she held her tongue.

Madam Wen went into the inner room and returned with more military and historical books, enthusiastically recommending them. She ended her pitch with:
“Read more books men like.”

Then she placed the books into Juchen’s book box.

Juchen looked at her busy figure.

It was sad, but she couldn’t completely blame her.

As the official wife who failed to bear sons for the Li family, Madam Wen had always been a subject of ridicule. Her bitterness was understandable, and Juchen found it hard to hold resentment.

In her mother’s eyes, only if Juchen was excellent enough would Li Ling show them a shred of affection. So Juchen had always believed that if she ever lost her value, no one would love her.

In her past life, her whole existence was about meeting others’ expectations. The moment she tried doing something for herself, everyone opposed it.

Madam Wen opened the book box and pulled out Juchen’s calligraphy practice, observing it for a moment before sighing,
“Your handwriting is still too delicate—not bold enough.”

“But someone told me it looks nice,” Juchen replied.

Seeing her daughter’s slight resistance, Madam Wen softened her tone,
“I didn’t say it’s not nice. It’s just too soft and lacks energy. You should practice writing styles from famous male calligraphers so your strokes will appear more vigorous.”

Still tirelessly teaching, Madam Wen turned around and saw Juchen staring at her in a daze.
“What’s wrong? Mother says this all for your good—don’t be annoyed.”

Juchen hesitated briefly, then looped her arm through her mother’s and smiled,
“Mother, I was just wondering—if Lady Mi had known Liu Shan would turn out so useless, would she still have jumped into the well to get him to Zhao Zilong?”

“There’s no such thing as ‘if she knew.’”

“True.” Juchen smiled faintly. “I was so absorbed in the book I even dreamed I was Liu Shan—waiting for Zhao Zilong, but he never came. I died.”

Madam Wen scolded her immediately,
“Don’t say such unlucky things!”

Juchen asked quietly,
“If something really happened to me one day, would you be sad?”

“How could I not be?” her mother replied, lightly tapping her forehead.

“If I were Liu Shan, would you give your life to hand me over to Zhao Zilong?” Juchen looked her straight in the eye. “Trade your life for mine?”

Madam Wen paused, frowned, and scolded:
“What nonsense is this child thinking?”

---

On her way back to her room, Juchen was deep in thought and accidentally bumped into two people coming from the other side. The maid dropped all the fabric she was carrying.

“Who’s so blind?” the maid cursed. But upon seeing who it was, she quickly added in a quieter tone,
“Oh, it’s the eldest young lady.”

Juchen glanced at her.
“I won’t punish you today, so no need to apologize.”

The maid, Dujuan, stiffened and muttered resentfully,
“It wasn’t like it was my fault either. I just spoke rashly because I was in a hurry.”
Then she added smugly,
“This fabric is for the second miss—a fur coat in the latest style. It was hard to get. If it got ruined, you’d have a harder time explaining.”

Before she could continue, Li Wanyu interrupted,
“Dujuan, big sister didn’t do it on purpose. Can’t you tell she’s in a bad mood?”

Her tone sounded like reproach, but it was full of mockery.

Juchen lifted her eyes to look at her, and Li Wanyu raised her chin proudly.

Rumor had it that Father planned to send her big sister into the palace—essentially turning her into an old maid. After all, with so many noble daughters entering the palace, who could guarantee success?

Li Wanyu had always looked down on her. Now with such “good news,” she was eager to throw shade.

But this time, Juchen didn’t respond as usual. She simply bent down to help pick up the fabric and handed it back calmly.

Both Li Wanyu and Dujuan were momentarily stunned.

Juchen ignored them and walked off.

Behind her, Li Wanyu called out,
“Are you going to the palace banquet before New Year’s?”

It was said that Princess Guangping was looking for a wife for her son and was using the palace banquet to evaluate candidates. The prince had always gotten along well with Juchen and once even said he wanted to marry her.

Juchen knew Li Wanyu dreamed of marrying high and said she needed to study and had no time.

The sisters had long competed with each other. Even if Juchen had never cared to fight, she would usually retort with sarcasm. But now she seemed indifferent.

Even Mingluan was puzzled and asked her why afterward.

Juchen smiled faintly and said,
“Because I’ve decided to turn over a new leaf.”

In the past, she and her younger sister fought all the time, and the younger one often pretended to be the victim, making her out to be aggressive and overbearing.

Sure, she wasn’t totally innocent, but her sister was petty and provoking.

But now that she had vowed to be a proper lady, she wouldn’t stoop to her level.

Mingluan asked,
“So you’re really not going to the prince’s wife selection banquet?”

“Of course not,” Juchen replied firmly.

In her past life, she went just to spite Li Wanyu—and caused a scene that became infamous.

She rejected the prince in front of everyone, had him say he’d wait for her until she was thirty, and in doing so offended most of the unmarried noblewomen in the capital. They later gave her a hard time in politics, labeling her a femme fatale and refusing to cooperate.

That’s how her reputation got ruined, step by step…

She couldn’t let that happen again.

---

After watching Juchen leave, Li Wanyu breathed a small sigh of relief.

Marriage was a lifelong matter for women—like a second chance at life.

Though favored at home, outside people thought her big sister was prettier and more talented.

With the Empress Dowager in power and female officials on the rise, it was possible Juchen would become a pioneer.

But Li Wanyu didn’t have the courage to break from tradition. She still believed marriage was a woman’s proper path.

And she had high standards—she wanted to marry into the most prestigious family in the capital, so everyone would speak of her when they mentioned the daughters of the Li family.

Currently, the only eligible male royals were two. The Prince of Guangping’s son was her best bet.

As for the other one—like a god in the sky—she dared not even dream of him.

---

Back in her room, Juchen arranged the books her mother gave her and sat at her desk, organizing her course materials and calligraphy. At the bottom of her book box, she pulled out a bookmark.

It was a recently dried white orchid—a keepsake from Song Mi when he returned from Taiyuan. He said he came across it by chance and thought it suited a young lady.

But in this season, where could one find such flowers?

She cupped it in her hand, leaned back in her chair, and stared at it, flooded with memories.

She had been reborn at that grand wedding banquet.

Moments earlier, she had been drinking by his grave.

Drunk and hazy, she’d mistakenly grabbed someone who looked like him.

She remembered that he shouldn’t have been at that banquet—but maybe they weren’t familiar yet.

When she woke up, she was in his arms.

Back then, she had no experience, just pure embarrassment and shame. She ran.

Later, she realized—it was a godsend.

He had once resented that they’d never truly been together. This was a chance to fix that.

The second time they met, she summoned the courage to stop him.

But he looked so indifferent—clearly not interested in entanglement.

That’s when she realized:
Oh no… I’m too early.

He didn’t love her yet.

She never did find out when he fell for her.

But there was no turning back now. Even if she wanted to change her image and make a good impression, their beginning was already too off course.

She fretted for a while but then laughed it off. It didn’t matter. She wanted to be with him—that was enough.

And so, shamelessly, she cemented the connection from their one-night stand.

The third time, it was Juchen who asked him out.