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Chapter 12 – Changing One’s Mindset

“Auntie Zhang, just say it straight. I’ve never treated myself as an outsider in the Lin family, and I hope you won’t treat me as one either.” Xu Jingchu’s voice was open and straightforward.

“In that case, I’ll be direct.” Zhang Qiuyun specialized in ideological education at her workplace; this was practically second nature to her.

It had been thirty years since the founding of the new China, and women were said to hold up half the sky. But some families still clung to feudal thinking, and young girls often couldn’t break free of it themselves. Once they came into the workplace, Zhang Qiuyun felt it was her duty to help every woman learn to stand on her own.

“I already know your and Yajuan’s family situations. Let’s set aside the job issue for now. Tell Auntie, if you start working and earning money, how do you plan to divide it up?”

Qin Yajuan was already anxious about the job decision. Now seeing Zhang Qiuyun talking to Xu Jingchu alone, she grew even more uneasy. Still, she didn’t dare interrupt. Judging from the tone, Zhang Qiuyun might actually be leaning toward her side.

This was so much simpler than in her last life—back then, she’d had to rely on her father’s ties with Lin Jianbai, rack her brains to win over the Lin family, smear Xu Jingchu as being promiscuous, and only after much scheming did she get her way.

Now, as long as she didn’t want to marry Lin Tingjun, everything was easier. Even heaven seemed to be helping her.

“I’ll give part of my wages to Uncle and Auntie for household expenses,” Xu Jingchu said softly. “And I’ll send money back home—my mother told me that if I earn money in the city, I have to send it back right away. Otherwise the family won’t be able to put food on the table.

“Since I won’t be home to do the laundry, cook, and keep the house tidy, the family’s burden will be heavier. But here I am enjoying the city life, which should have been my brother’s opportunity. It’s only because I’m a girl that I get to benefit. So I owe this to my brother.

“And now that I’m grown, I have to be filial to my parents. My little nephew calls me Auntie—I have to take responsibility for him too. And my sister-in-law… I need to keep her happy as well.”

Xu Jingchu rattled off all this as if it had been etched into her mind. That was simply the way she had been raised to think.

In her previous life, Xu Jingchu had indeed lived this way her whole life—treating everyone well, except herself.

Only on her deathbed did she finally realize: nobody actually cared about her. They only saw her as a tool, eager to use her up until nothing was left.

Reborn, Xu Jingchu swore to herself: no one mattered more than she did. And those who had wronged her—Qin Yajuan, Wang Yuejin, and the entire Xu family—once she was strong enough, she would repay them all one by one.

Hearing Xu Jingchu’s words, Zhang Qiuyun nodded knowingly. “Jingchu, Auntie treats you like her own daughter, so I’ll speak plainly.”

“Yes, Auntie.” Xu Jingchu sat quietly, like a delicate porcelain doll, lowering her gaze to hide the sharp thoughts flickering in her mind.

Lin Tingjun watched her, his brows twitching slightly. No wonder her cooking was so good—it must’ve been honed from years of doing housework at home. She really was a pitiful soul.

“Jingchu, do you truly believe what your mother says? That you were born owing your brother something? Parents should be honored, yes, but not blindly so.” Zhang Qiuyun launched into her work mode, determined not to stop until she got through.

“Auntie Zhang, I… I never thought about whether it was right or wrong. All the girls in the village are like this. And my mother taught me the same.” Xu Jingchu spoke timidly, curling into herself on the stool at the mention of her family, looking frightened.

“Not everyone does this, and just following along doesn’t make it right. If we were only meant to live by tradition, then why did we have a revolution? Why strive for change at all?”

Zhang Qiuyun’s words rang out powerfully, and Lin Jianbai, watching from the side, gave her a big thumbs-up. His wife really was made for ideological work—her arguments came out sharp and compelling.

“Auntie, I don’t quite understand.” Xu Jingchu feigned innocence.

“Let me make it clearer,” Zhang Qiuyun pressed on. “You and your brother are equals. When you were doing chores and farm work, what was he doing? When your parents ask you to send money home, do they ask your brother too? Your nephew and sister-in-law are your brother’s responsibility, not yours.

“Yes, you should honor your parents—but they’re not yours alone to honor. If your parents only place demands on you and not on your brother, are those demands fair?

“And as for this nonsense about how it should’ve been your brother’s chance to enjoy city life—that’s not true. Your Uncle Lin and I only ever intended to bring you and Yajuan to the city. We never thought of your brother. So you needn’t feel guilty about that!”

Her string of questions struck like hammer blows, each word powerful and certain. Her speech poured into Xu Jingchu’s parched heart like the first spring rain.

After a long silence, Xu Jingchu finally said, “Auntie Zhang, I think I need some time to really digest what you’ve said today.”

Zhang Qiuyun hadn’t expected her to process so quickly. She had prepared for a drawn-out battle, with countless talking points lined up—yet they weren’t even needed.

Though just a rural girl, Xu Jingchu’s thinking wasn’t entirely shackled by old traditions. In fact, she was even easier to reason with than some of the young women at her workplace.

“Yes. Learning culture and knowledge is one thing, but raising your ideological level is equally important,” Zhang Qiuyun concluded.

Qin Yajuan, who had come in eager and hopeful, now felt utterly deflated. She had thought Zhang Qiuyun would say outright that the job should go to her—after all, even if Xu Jingchu worked, she’d just be sending money home. But instead, Zhang Qiuyun only urged Xu Jingchu not to help her family so much.

Frustrated, Qin Yajuan realized she couldn’t count on others. If she wanted the job, she would need to scheme for it herself. Compared to winning Lin Tingjun’s heart in her last life, this task was far easier.

“No need to rush,” Lin Jianbai wrapped up. “The papermill recruitment is still an internal matter. You both have a week to think it over. Like I said before—no matter who gets the job, the other will still have food and lodging here. And I’ll keep looking for opportunities for both of you.”

“Okay,” both girls answered obediently.

“Jingchu, I’m begging you—let me have the papermill job. I need the money more urgently than you.” Back in their room, Qin Yajuan pleaded endlessly, keeping Xu Jingchu from focusing on her studies.

“Yajuan, you know my family’s situation too…” Fine, if it was a contest of hardship, she would play along.

“Didn’t Auntie Zhang just tell you not to worry about your family? You should be thinking of yourself first,” Qin Yajuan lectured self-righteously.

“Yajuan, I think you’re right. If I consider myself first, then how about this—you give me 500 yuan, and I’ll let you have the job. What do you think?” Xu Jingchu, annoyed, just wanted her to shut up.

“You’re crazy! Uncle Lin got this job for us. We’re competing fairly. Why should I pay you?” Qin Yajuan leapt up from the bed in anger.

“Well then, if it’s fair competition, why should I step aside for you?” Xu Jingchu replied coolly, leaving Qin Yajuan speechless.

Humming a tune, Xu Jingchu picked up her clothes and went to wash up, completely ignoring the fuming Qin Yajuan rolling around on the bed.

“Tingjun-ge.” Fresh off her little victory, Xu Jingchu was in high spirits. Even though Lin Tingjun’s face was as icy as ever, she cheerfully greeted him.

“Mm.” His reply was as terse as always, no different than before. Xu Jingchu was used to it by now and simply stepped aside to let him pass.

“My mother’s words today—you should really think them over. Studying is your best path forward. You need long-term vision. Relying on others or anything else won’t last.”

His low voice carried no address, so at first Xu Jingchu didn’t even realize he was speaking to her. By the time she caught on and murmured a “thank you,” he was already striding away.

This man… even when caring for someone, he was so cold! No wonder in her last life she heard he and Qin Yajuan hadn’t lived happily.

Still, he was right. Xu Jingchu knew she didn’t truly want to go to the papermill—what she wanted was to stay in the Lin household, focus on her studies while food and lodging were free, and ace next year’s college entrance exams.

Once admitted to university, she would figure out tuition and living costs. A few hard years now would mean a far better future.

But she couldn’t show her true intentions yet. Not now. Otherwise she wouldn’t get to watch Qin Yajuan hopping around like a monkey.

Sure enough, Qin Yajuan’s sulking only lasted a day. The very next afternoon, while Xu Jingchu was picking vegetables in the kitchen, she heard her return home humming happily.

Since Qin Yajuan was the grudge-holding type, her sudden good mood could only mean one thing—she had found a new way to deal with Xu Jingchu.

Xu Jingchu braced herself. In her past life, Qin Yajuan only had a few tricks; she could already guess what might be coming. But now that she had been reborn, perhaps Qin Yajuan would come up with something new. At least it would be entertaining to watch.

“Xu Jingchu,” Qin Yajuan pushed open the kitchen door, “I’ll ask you one last time—will you tell Uncle Lin and Auntie Zhang that you don’t want the job?”

“Why should I?” Xu Jingchu shot back.

Qin Yajuan said nothing, just slammed the door with a loud bang and stormed off.

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