Chapter 10: His Heart Felt Heavy and Weary

Gu Jiusi was utterly dumbfounded. He covered his cheek with his hand, struggling to comprehend the situation. Liu Yuru collapsed onto the bed, her sobs echoing through the room.

How could she have married such a man?…

How could she have married such a man!

She could have tolerated his dandy nature or his lack of a respectable profession, but if he had shown even the slightest affection for her, as Ye Yun had said, it would have been bearable. However, he had no interest in her whatsoever! Worse still, he assumed she had schemed her way into the Gu family for their wealth, fixated on the idea of giving her money and divorcing her.

He spoke of those devious plans, which sounded pleasant, but if they were actually carried out, she would likely be drowned in the scorn of the masses as soon as he divorced her!

She couldn’t fathom how Gu Jiusi could have such an absurd idea. After much contemplation, she concluded that he must be dissatisfied with being forced to marry her and was deliberately humiliating her.

She had no energy to explain anymore. Even if Gu Jiusi truly knew that she had been forced into this marriage, what difference would it make? His words rang true: Who would willingly throw their happiness away for some stranger?

If Gu Jiusi genuinely intended to divorce her, he would do so sooner or later. Even if he didn’t divorce her, he would never allow her to live a comfortable life. Without her husband’s favor, even as the principal wife, didn’t he know what kind of life she would lead?

Her mother, Su Wan, was a prime example. The only reasons Liu Xuan hadn’t divorced her mother were her silent endurance and that Concubine Yue couldn’t attain a legitimate status, while Su Wan was a true lady from a respectable family.

But what about Liu Yuru? The Liu family was definitely not within the Gu family’s consideration, and she didn’t have a brother who would back her in the Liu family. If Gu Jiusi truly met a woman he fancied, there was no way he would hesitate to divorce her for the sake of the Liu family!

The more Liu Yuru dwelled on these thoughts, the more despair consumed her. Realizing how close she had been to marrying Ye Shi’an, a man she had meticulously planned for, only deepened her hopelessness. She lost all composure, sprawling on the bed, her sobs wracking her body.

Gu Jiusi was baffled by her tears. After a long pause, he slowly collected himself and with a hand still covering his cheek, muttered, “Wasn’t I the one who got slapped?”

Her response was an even louder wail.

Gu Jiusi felt her crying was intensifying his headache. He quickly said, “Don’t cry, don’t cry. I won’t say another word. Your crying is giving me a terrible headache. Sigh, forget it. Have you eaten anything?”

Liu Yuru didn’t respond, her sobs continuing unabated.

Gu Jiusi’s stomach growled. He had been beaten by his father upon waking, then dragged out to get married, and forced to drink alcohol without having eaten much. He got up, went to the table, gathered some pastries and a cup of tea, and observed Liu Yuru as he ate.

Liu Yuru’s tears continued to flow, and Gu Jiusi couldn’t comprehend how someone could cry so persistently.

He brought the pastries over and sighed, “Stop crying. Eat something. Eating will make you much happier.”

“Get lost!” Liu Yuru snapped.

Gu Jiusi’s patience wore thin. Watching Liu Yuru’s tears, he retorted in annoyance, “What’s wrong with you? Is this how you repay kindness? I was simply discussing our future plans with you. Don’t you like Ye Shi’an? Why are you crying incessantly when I’m showing you a clear path?”

Gu Jiusi leaned against a nearby pillar, nonchalantly eating the pastries, his words slightly muffled, “I’m telling you, stop crying. A few tears are enough. I have a short temper.”

Liu Yuru remained unmoved by his words. Her sobbing was unrelenting. Gu Jiusi finally reached his limit and exclaimed, “What in the world are you crying about?!”

He set down the plate and spoke aggressively, “Is it just about the possibility of a future divorce? What’s the big deal? I’ll definitely arrange a way out for you when the time comes. What are you afraid of? Isn’t the one you like Ye—” He abruptly stopped, as if struck by a sudden realization. His eyes widened in astonishment as he looked at Liu Yuru, “You don’t like me, do you?!”

Liu Yuru truly lost control, and bawled loudly.

Like him? How could she possibly like such a person!

However, Gu Jiusi seemed to have stumbled upon the heart of the matter. He was both shocked and frightened, gazing at Liu Yuru on the bed, momentarily frozen in place.

In all these years, it was the first time someone had liked him. He felt a flicker of… shyness and awkwardness.

But he quickly regained his composure. Softening his voice and adopting a kinder tone, he coughed lightly and said, “Well, I understand your feelings, but I really can’t reciprocate. You’re not the type I like. Don’t set your heart on me. If you want money, that’s a small matter. Our Gu family has plenty. But if you want my heart, that’s too difficult.”

He sighed and regarded her with a pitying gaze.

Previously, he had been angry and annoyed, believing Liu Yuru had schemed to marry into their family for money. Now, knowing she actually liked him, he felt a pang of sympathy.

She wasn’t his type.

The women he favored were naturally captivating and radiant. A woman unlike any other in this world and could draw him in with a single glance.

Liu Yuru, on the other hand, was ordinary, too ordinary; she was prim and proper, too much so.

The thought of this unrequited love and Liu Yuru’s sacrifice filled Gu Jiusi with guilt. He spoke to her gently, his voice low and coaxing, “Don’t cry anymore. The future is long, and you have time to reflect. Although I do not return your affections, since you’ve married into the family, my mother will treat you well. My parents are both very kind. Don’t worry.”

Liu Yuru almost spat out a mouthful of blood. She didn’t marry his parents! 

She refused to acknowledge him, continuing to vent her grievances and sorrow.

Gu Jiusi persisted in his gentle persuasion, “Don’t cry, don’t cry. I’ll tell you a joke. Come, eat something. It’s not good to starve yourself. Miss Liu, heartache harms the body. Don’t dwell on me. In the future, focus on material things. Real gold and silver, that’s what truly matters. You’re such a smart person, how can you not grasp this principle?

“Come now, stop crying and rest well. Once you’ve rested, I’ll take you shopping tomorrow. When you spend lavishly, you’ll realize that if there’s any pain in this world that cannot be cured, it must be because you don’t have enough money.”

“Here,” Gu Jiusi took out a banknote from his pocket. This was his last resort. Usually, whenever he offered money, anyone would smile at him, but he wasn’t certain if it would work this time. He placed the banknote in Liu Yuru’s arms and said earnestly, “You’re exhausted from crying. Hold this banknote and sleep well.”

Liu Yuru didn’t say anything. She was truly drained from weeping. Gu Jiusi helped her onto the bed, removed her phoenix crown, took off her shoes, and carefully tucked her in with the quilt. Liu Yuru curled up, clutching the banknote, and sobbed on the bed.

Gu Jiusi sat on the floor while leaning against the bed. When he heard Liu Yuru’s cries subside and the sound of her sleeping breaths came from behind him, Gu Jiusi sighed.

His heart felt heavy and weary.

He’s just a dandy. Why must he be saddled with these complex and weighty emotional entanglement?

Feeling sentimental, he touched his pocket and once again affirmed that one should always carry ample money. When one banknote fails to solve a problem, you can always offer another.