Chapter 30

Xu Duanyi was walking with Bixi toward Linfeng Pavilion when, unexpectedly, she ran into someone on the way.

“Ping’an?”

She was the first to notice Xie Ping’an.

Her tone carried a hint of surprise as she called out to him, startled to find him in this area.

His residence was quite far from here, and this path was not one he typically needed to take.

A suspicion rose in Xu Duanyi’s heart.

Bixi’s reaction upon seeing Xie Ping’an was far more pronounced.

The memory of his behavior the previous day made her uneasy. Compared to the composed and noble Prince of Nanan, it was the short-tempered Xie Sanlang that worried her more.

Children with bad tempers and little self-control were the hardest to manage.

She furrowed her brows and tried to step in front of her mistress, concerned that the ill-tempered boy might do something inappropriate.

Her behavior didn’t escape Xie Ping’an’s notice.

A flicker of sarcasm passed through his eyes, but he didn’t let it show. Today, he wasn’t here to pick a fight—he was here to apologize.

Just as he had declared last night—

A man must take responsibility for his actions!

He had wrongly accused her, and an apology was owed.

And so…

Just as Xie Ping’an opened his mouth to speak, his distinguished sister-in-law gently patted Bixi’s arm, signaling her not to stand in the way.

Then, to his surprise, she took the initiative to approach him.

“Ping’an, is there something you need from me?”

Her calm reaction left Xie Ping’an a bit taken aback.

Looking at Xu Duanyi’s kind smile, a memory surfaced in his mind—a younger, gentler version of her smile slowly overlapped with the present one.

It was the Xu Duanyi of the past.

This momentarily dazed him.

But confusion didn’t linger long before memories of mockery, harsh words, and sneering smiles rushed in like a flood.

His expression grew even colder.

He took a step back as if trying to put more distance between them.

“Take this back.”

His face stiff, he thrust the item in his hand toward her.

Without even looking, Xu Duanyi already knew what it was.

She gazed at the boy’s taut expression and thin lips pressed into a firm line.

She didn’t ask why he was returning it or whether he disliked it.

She could guess the reason.

Sighing inwardly, she betrayed no sign of disappointment.

Her voice remained gentle as she asked, “Do you really want to return it? It was just a little meeting gift for you and Changning.”

A clear struggle flickered across the boy’s face.

He truly liked the gift. Last night, after completing his homework, he had admired it for a long time, even studying the chessboard layout with great focus.

It was the best and most thoughtful gift he had ever received.

But his hesitation didn’t last.

He pulled his gaze away from the chess manual with a cold, determined air.

Without a word, he continued holding it out to her.

Xu Duanyi understood—he truly didn’t intend to keep it.

She sympathized with his feelings.

When her aunt first brought her to the palace, even though her aunt and the Crown Prince were unfailingly kind, she still felt unworthy of their generosity.

It was a sense of inadequacy—

A fear of receiving something good and being unable to return the favor, of one day being rejected and cast aside.

That fear had lingered for years, only fading as her heart grew stronger and more secure.

Xie Ping’an carried that same burden.

Perhaps even more so, with deeper wariness and mistrust.

A boy who had suffered harsh treatment would be slow to trust kindness, reluctant to offer his heart.

If you don’t possess anything, you never fear losing it.

But if one day you are given something precious, only to have it ripped away—that pain cuts far deeper than never having it at all.

Xu Duanyi’s heart ached for the boy before her.

Out of that compassion, she chose not to force him.

She accepted the chess manual from his hands. His reluctance was evident, but he sighed with relief.

“And also—”

As he withdrew his hand, Xie Ping’an spoke again.

When Xu Duanyi looked at him, a flicker of embarrassment crossed his face. He didn’t avert his gaze but seemed to want to escape.

He is definitely not Xie Qingya!

His hands hung at his sides, clenched tightly. He looked at Xu Duanyi’s face and said, “Yesterday, I misunderstood and thought you were bullying Changning. That was my mistake. I’m sorry.”

This reaction surprised Bixi, who had been somewhat dissatisfied with him. She glanced at him in astonishment.

She clearly didn’t expect the hot-tempered Sanlang to apologize voluntarily.

Xu Duanyi still smiled at him. “It’s nothing. You didn’t really do anything.”

Xie Ping’an hadn’t anticipated how easily this matter would be resolved.

No difficulty, no mockery.

It left him feeling somewhat bewildered.

“Is there anything else?”

After a moment of silence, Xu Duanyi took the initiative to ask when he didn’t speak further.

Only then did Xie Ping’an come back to his senses.

He shook his head, keeping his emotions hidden from Xu Duanyi.

“Then I’ll head back?”

Xu Duanyi held the chess manual as he spoke to Xie Ping’an.

Xie Ping’an nodded and stepped aside to let them pass.

Only after Xu Duanyi and her maid had walked far away did Xie Ping’an finally look in the direction where they had left. He stared for a long time, his eyes not withdrawing even when they had completely disappeared, his brow furrowed in thought.

It was a long while before he finally turned to leave.

—-

“You treat them like younger siblings, but Sanlang… it’s such a shame about that rare copy. You even sent people to search for it for quite some time.”

Bixi hugged the chess manual, her face full of regret and indignation.

Xu Duanyi remained silent.

It wasn’t until Bixi asked where to place the manual that Xu Duanyi finally spoke. “Just leave it out for now; no need to put it away.”

Bixi didn’t know what she intended but didn’t question it either. She softly answered in the affirmative.

When they returned to Linfeng Pavilion, Shiyu was delighted to see them.

While Xu Duanyi drank tea, Shiyu relayed the events that had happened in the residence that day.

Nothing particularly significant had occurred.

Matters of the Prince of Nan’an’s household were managed by Governess Deng, so Xu Duanyi mostly received invitations and social cards.

Many familiar families were hosting banquets and requesting her presence.

Before her marriage, Xu Duanyi had spent most of her time in the palace. Apart from the Xiao family, few could invite her to such gatherings.

Now that she had married into the Prince of Nan’an’s residence, even those without the intention had to keep up appearances.

Xu Duanyi glanced at the thick stack of invitations.

She flipped through a few and lost interest.

Tea gatherings, poetry salons — just groups sitting together, chatting and drinking tea. She had no patience for such things.

“Sort them by importance later. I’m going to take a bath first.” She felt exhausted after a long day.

“Shall I call someone to fetch water?”

Shiyu immediately went out to arrange it.

Bixi went to prepare clothes and bath essentials.

When the bath was over, Xu Duanyi sat at the dressing table, letting Bixi comb her hair while she listened to details about those who had sent invitations.

“Draft replies declining them all,” Xu Duanyi said, smoothing cream on her face. “Just say I’m busy for now. I’ll invite them some other time.”

Bixi complied.

“Oh,” Xu Duanyi added, “when is Baozhu’s wedding?”

Without hesitation, Bixi answered, “On the tenth of next month.”

That left only about half a month.

“Come with me to the Duke of Huguo’s residence tomorrow.” When she had gotten married, her elder cousin and his wife had done a great deal for her.

Besides, it had been a long time since she had visited her grandmother, uncle, and aunt.

Her uncle and aunt had attended her wedding, but she hadn’t spoken much with them.

Although her relationship with them wasn’t particularly close, blood ties still mattered.

It was only right to visit.

Then she thought of her father—

He hadn’t been able to return for the wedding.

Though it had prevented any accidents, she worried something might have happened.

So last night, she wrote to him, asking about his health.

Fearing he wouldn’t tell her the truth, she also secretly wrote to Qin Su, her father’s trusted aide, to inquire why he hadn’t come.

Although they had lived apart for years, her father had always treated her well.

With no sons in the family, many had suggested remarriage after her mother passed.

Even her aunt couldn’t say much about it, given there was only one daughter in the marquis household.

But her father had firmly refused.

He declared he would have only one wife and one daughter.

No sons, then no sons.

He didn’t care whether someone would be there to carry on his name or bury him.

If nothing serious had happened, he wouldn’t have missed her wedding.

She was worried about what had kept him away.

When Shiyu returned, Xu Duanyi asked, “Did you send the letters I gave you this morning?”

“Yes,” Shiyu said quickly. “The gatekeeper sent it off as soon as he heard it was for the Marquis.”

Xu Duanyi finally felt relieved.

With everything taken care of, exhaustion overwhelmed her.

She yawned and went to bed.

When she reached the four-poster bed, Xu Duanyi paused slightly as she noticed the two pillows placed side by side.

It was only for a moment, though. When Bixi, behind her, asked what was wrong, Xu Duanyi snapped out of her thoughts and replied, “Nothing. I’ll sleep for half an hour. Wake me when the time comes.”

With that, Xu Duanyi lifted the quilt and got into bed without asking anyone to remove the pillow beside her.

Seeing her close her eyes, Bixi quietly lowered the bed curtain.

She must have been truly exhausted.

Xu Duanyi fell asleep quickly.

When she woke up, she could hear voices outside.

At first, she couldn’t make out what they were saying.

Her mind was still foggy from sleep, and this was when Xu Duanyi was at her least guarded. Pulling the quilt up to cover her face, she turned over, facing the inside, trying to steal a few more moments of rest.

Then, she vaguely recognized Xie Changning’s voice.

At first, she thought she might have been mistaken. But when she lowered the quilt, the sounds from outside grew clearer.

“Ah… Is Sister-in-law resting? I… I’ll come back later, then.”

“Hey.”

Bixi stopped her. “The young lady came a long way; why not sit inside and wait for my mistress to wake up? She should be awake soon.”

“This…”

It was really her!

Xu Duanyi immediately became fully alert.

As she sat up, she called out, “Bixi, tell Changning I’m awake!”

Having said that, she lifted the quilt and got up.

Shiyu came in to help her freshen up, and after a simple wash, Xu Duanyi went outside.

In the meantime, Bixi had already invited Xie Changning into the room and served her a cup of almond milk tea, her favorite.

When Xu Duanyi entered, Xie Changning was sitting rather nervously on the seat outside, carefully holding the tea bowl and sipping slowly.

The moment she saw Xu Duanyi, she immediately stood up.

“Sister-in-law!”

Her face was full of guilt, clearly believing that her visit had woken Xu Duanyi.

Xu Duanyi noticed this and quickly smiled, saying, “I just woke up and heard your voice. Perfect timing! I wanted to find you anyway.”

“F-find me?”

Xie Changning’s guilt was momentarily interrupted by surprise as she raised her head, unsure what her sister-in-law wanted from her.

“Sit down first.”

Xu Duanyi pulled Xie Changning back to her seat.

Bixi served a cup of freshly brewed Bi Luo Chun tea.

The fragrant aroma filled the air before she even tasted it. Feeling a bit thirsty, Xu Duanyi took a sip first.

Noticing Xie Changning’s expectant gaze, she chuckled and put down her tea.

Her hand instinctively lifted, wanting to pat Changning’s head, but she remembered how uncomfortable Changning had been yesterday when she avoided her touch.

To avoid making her uneasy, Xu Duanyi held back.

“Changning.”

She continued, “Does your third brother still enjoy playing chess?”

Xie Changning, having no clue what her third brother had done earlier, nodded immediately. “Yes, he does!”

Eager to prove it and grateful to Xu Duanyi, she added, “Yesterday, when my third brother saw the chess manual you gave him, his eyes lit up!”

“Thank you, Sister-in-law.”

She had come today both to thank and apologize.

With the gratitude expressed, she now felt the need to apologize as well.

Though her third brother had promised to apologize himself, Xie Changning felt responsible for the incident and wanted to make amends too.

However, before she could say anything, Xu Duanyi handed her something.

“This… What is this?”

As she reached out to take it, confusion filled her expression. But when she saw what it was, her face suddenly changed.

“T-this…”

Shock turned her tone urgent, her small face flushed red.

She wanted to speak, but her anxiety made her stutter even more than usual. Already prone to slow speech, her agitation only worsened it.

She didn’t understand—how had the chess manual she gave her third brother ended up back with Xu Duanyi?

A terrible possibility crossed her mind.

Her previously flushed face turned pale.

“Don’t worry,” Xu Duanyi gently reassured her.

Tears welled up in Xie Changning’s eyes. If she had known her third brother would handle things like this, she would never have let him come!

Sister-in-law must be heartbroken.

Guilt and worry filled her heart.

Looking at Xu Duanyi, she was so distressed that she nearly cried. “S-Sister-in-law… I-I…”

She wanted to apologize.

But anxiety choked her words.

Xu Duanyi quickly calmed her down. “No need to be anxious. I’m showing you this not because I’m angry with your brother, nor do I intend to blame you.”

She asked Bixi to bring a damp cloth.

When Bixi returned, Xu Duanyi took the cloth and gently wiped Xie Changning’s tears as she spoke.

“I understand why your brother acted this way. He isn’t targeting me; he’s just afraid, isn’t he?”

Xie Changning couldn’t find her voice.

But her eyes lit up when she heard Xu Duanyi’s words, and she nodded repeatedly, indicating that it was exactly like that!

“So of course, I won’t blame him.”

Xu Duanyi wiped the tears from her face and placed the handkerchief aside.

She looked into Xie Changning’s eyes and continued, “Actually, I showed you this because I want to ask you for a favor.”

“A favor?”

Xie Changning blinked, appearing a bit confused, but her emotions were finally calmed, and she could speak.

She looked at her sister-in-law in surprise.

Confused.

What could she do to help her sister-in-law?

Xu Duanyi looked at her and said in a calm voice, “I can tell that your third brother really likes this chess manual, and I also know that your third brother is quite talented in this area, so I thought I’d give it to you.”

“If your third brother asks, just say you like it, and I gave it to you.”

Though Xie Changning was only thirteen this year, she was very clever, despite being gentle in personality.

At first, she didn’t understand her sister-in-law’s meaning.

But after hearing her, she immediately realized her sister-in-law’s intention.

Her bright eyes immediately shone with light.

She was a little happy.

This idea of her sister-in-law’s was really good!

This way, her third brother wouldn’t be troubled.

Just as she was about to nod in agreement, Xie Changning suddenly hesitated and looked at Xu Duanyi. “…Sister-in-law.”

She called her softly.

“Mm?”

Xu Duanyi looked at her, smiling as she asked, “What’s the matter?”

Xie Changning pulled at the hem of her clothes, hesitating before asking softly, “Why… why are you so kind to us?”

She rarely asked such questions.

After speaking, she instinctively wanted to lower her head, but after a moment’s hesitation, she mustered the courage to look up at Xu Duanyi.

She saw her sister-in-law looking at her in surprise, as if she didn’t expect such a question.

This gaze made Xie Changning feel nervous, and she wanted to lower her head again.

But before she could completely lower her head, a gentle hand lightly pressed on her head, as if comforting her, and then softly stroked it.

Xie Changning was a little unaccustomed to such close contact.

It made her tense up, even wanting to retreat.

Just like yesterday.

But perhaps because the hand was so gentle.

So gentle.

It felt as if… her mother had returned.

She couldn’t bear to pull away.

Xie Changning lifted her head again under this gesture, gazing at Xu Duanyi with a dazed look.

She saw the surprise on her sister-in-law’s face, which had already been replaced by a gentle smile.

Then her voice came: “Because I consider you all my younger siblings. Although you might not believe me when I say this, when Xie Qingya brought me to see you all, when I held you in my arms, I truly thought of you as my younger siblings.”

“Besides, Xie…”

She instinctively wanted to say Xie Uncle and Xie Aunt.

But looking at Xie Changning’s innocent face, Xu Duanyi changed her words: “Grandfather, grandmother, and big brother have also treated me very well, so for their sake, I should treat you well and take care of you.”

“Changning.”

She called her gently.

When Xie Changning looked at her in confusion, Xu Duanyi continued with a soft voice, “I know you’ve been through a lot over the years. I also know that some things can’t be changed overnight.”

“But you should never refuse others’ kindness because you’re afraid.”

“Maybe there will still be people who hurt you, but that’s their fault, not yours. Don’t punish yourself or imprison yourself because of others’ mistakes.”

“You should always trust and gradually differentiate what’s right or wrong, what’s good or bad… For those who treat you well and truly care for you, you can feel grateful. For those who are bad and malicious, you don’t need to be afraid that everyone will be like them.”

“We can’t punish ourselves because of others’ mistakes.”

“We have to look forward and get out of bad situations.”

When Xu Duanyi said these words, she kept looking at Xie Changning.

The gesture of stroking her head earlier was an unconscious move, and when her hand was placed there, she regretted it, afraid that Changning would pull away just like yesterday.

But to her surprise, she didn’t.

Seeing her gaze, though filled with confusion, there was also an underlying fondness and longing.

Xu Duanyi guessed.

She might have been thinking of Xie Aunt, so she didn’t pull her hand away.

She slowly spoke to Changning.

Seeing the confusion on Changning’s face gradually turning into contemplation, Xu Duanyi added, “These words may not be something you can immediately understand right now, don’t rush, take your time.”

“But if you ever have anything, you can tell me, I’ll be your most loyal listener.”

Once Xu Duanyi finished speaking, she withdrew her hand.

At that moment, Xie Changning felt a sense of reluctance and attachment as she saw Xu Duanyi’s hand being withdrawn.

But she didn’t say anything to stop her.

She simply kept clutching her clothes and looking at Xu Duanyi, quietly saying, “Sister-in-law, thank you.”

Since her mother passed away, no one had ever spoken these words to her again.

Though she couldn’t immediately understand or act on her sister-in-law’s words, one thing she was certain of… her sister-in-law was truly looking out for her, for them.

Aunt Deng and Fuqu cared for her, but after all, their status was different from hers.

They mostly just took care of her basic needs.

Moreover, they always treat her like a child. Many times, they keep her protected behind them, and she has never had a conversation with them in which they truly spoke from the heart.

Her third brother is very fond of her.

But her third brother is living under too much pressure, too tightly wound… Every time she sees him, she just wants him to live more easily, and of course, she wouldn’t say unnecessary things to him.

As for her second brother…

She hasn’t had a proper conversation with him in a long, long time.

So when her second brother visited her last night, she was happy, but more so surprised.

But she wouldn’t say anything to her second brother because of that.

It seems that she has become accustomed to shutting herself off. She doesn’t want her two brothers to worry about her or be overly concerned.

It seems that she… has started to fear troubling others.

She doesn’t want to become a burden or a nuisance to anyone. It feels like this way, they can always stay like this.

But her sister-in-law told her…

“You can accept the kindness of others. You don’t have to be afraid of others’ malice.”

“You shouldn’t punish yourself because of others’ mistakes.”

“You have to believe that there will always be someone who loves you in this world.”

It was so shocking.

Xie Changning only felt her mind filled with these words, but she didn’t feel distressed; instead, she felt an unprecedented sense of fullness and ease.

Her lips formed a shallow curve, and Xie Changning didn’t reject the kindness anymore.

Instead, she picked up the book, smiled brightly, and thanked Xu Danyi: “Sister-in-law, thank you, thank you!”

It was the first time she didn’t feel nervous because of her stutter.

Instead, she faced Xu Danyi with a beaming smile.

Seeing her sister-in-law smile and raise her hand again, Xie Changning understood what she was about to do. But seeing her hold back, as if she wanted to put her hand down, she also understood why her sister-in-law was doing that.

After a moment of hesitation, Xie Changning gathered the courage to gently move her head toward Xu Danyi.

At first, Xu Danyi didn’t quite understand what she was doing, but when she saw her somewhat shy and nervous expression, Xu Danyi recalled that she hadn’t seemed to mind earlier, and she reached out to touch her head.

A vague suspicion grew in her mind.

Xu Danyi cautiously placed her hand on her soft head.

Seeing the little girl immediately smile, Xu Danyi’s eyes also curved into a smile.

She had guessed correctly.

Bixi and Shiyu, who were inside the room, also smiled upon seeing this scene.

This meeting made Xu Danyi and Xie Changning become much closer.

As dinner time approached, Xie Changning took the initiative to suggest to Xu Danyi, “Sister-in-law, will you have dinner with us tonight?”

Xu Danyi knew that she and Ping’an always had meals together. Although Ping’an didn’t particularly like her, Xu Danyi felt there was no need to reject the child’s invitation.

With Changning there, Ping’an shouldn’t get too upset over her presence.

Changning had finally lowered her guard and become closer to her, which was great, and she shouldn’t disappoint her.

Just as she was about to agree, she heard Xie Changning add, “I… I’ll go and call second brother too!”

She naturally had her own little thoughts.

She liked her sister-in-law.

She hoped second brother and her sister-in-law could be together harmoniously.

But Xu Danyi, who had almost spoken up, paused when she heard this.

“Sister-in-law?”

Not hearing Xu Danyi’s response, Xie Changning looked up at her.

Xu Danyi met her gaze.

The response she had intended to give turned into a gentle refusal: “Today, sister-in-law is a bit tired, so I won’t go. I’ll come to visit you another time, okay?”

Xie Changning felt a bit regretful, but naturally, she didn’t want to insist.

“Then… later, I’ll invite sister-in-law to dinner!” she said with a smile.

Xu Danyi naturally agreed.

Outside, it was getting dark. Xu Danyi didn’t want to delay her dinner, so she had someone prepare lanterns.

But as Shi Yu went to prepare the lanterns, Xu Danyi asked Xie Changning, “Changning.”

Xie Changning responded, asking, “Sister-in-law, what is it?” She looked at Xu Danyi eagerly, her eyes clear.

But Xu Danyi remembered the moment when she had reached out to her yesterday and noticed her brief unease and panic.

Was it simply a fear of physical contact?

Or had someone really done something to her?

Xu Danyi didn’t know.

She looked at Xie Changning and asked, “Has someone bullied you?”

“What… what?”

Xie Changning seemed not to understand, but Xu Danyi noticed the brief confusion in her face before a hint of panic flashed across it.

Before Xu Danyi could ask further, she hurriedly denied, “No, no.”