Chapter 76: Not a Virtuous Woman

In the evening, Xu Jun Ying returned after visiting others to pay New Year’s greetings. He smelled of alcohol but was not drunk. He went to the old lady’s room to greet her, exchanged a few words, and did not feel like drinking the tea brewed by Zhuang Yu Lan. He returned to Qing Hua Courtyard, where Rui Zhu and Rui Bao assisted him in bathing and changing clothes. Bao Ju opened the study door, but Xu Jun Ying did not enter. He asked Bao Ju to lock the study again and instead headed to the main room in Qing Hua Courtyard.

Inside the main room, Meinang was practicing handstands on a soft couch against the wall. Cui Xi and Cui Lian were sitting nearby, doing needlework, while Cui Si was practicing writing. Meinang told the three maids that Cui Si’s handwriting was the worst among them, and she should practice writing ten to twenty characters every day.

Wang Mama came in and said, “It’s time. The madam should get up.” Meinang, who was almost exhausted, flipped back. Her body was weak, and her physical condition had deteriorated so much that she could no longer hold a handstand for more than ten minutes, a far cry from the time when she could endure it for half an hour or more. She reminisced about the days when she used to practice in the gym and fight on stage, performing acrobatic flips effortlessly. Now, she dared not overdo it, as she feared injuring herself and being unable to leave the house.

Suddenly, she heard Cheng’er’s crisp voice calling from outside, “The Lord has returned.”

The people in the room froze for a moment, and then chaos ensued. It had been a long time since Lord Xu had come to the main room. Meinang, who had been practicing or reviewing accounts, had gotten used to being alone with the maids, but now they had to quickly tidy up. The three maids rushed to leave the couch as Xu Jun Ying lifted the curtain and entered.

The room was warm, and the air had a faint floral scent. Meinang was wearing only a fitted light snow-pink undergarment and had not yet donned her outer robe. She got off the couch and bowed to Xu Jun Ying. Xu Jun Ying stood with his hands behind his back, not looking at her, and said, “Go put on your clothes. I have something to say to you.”

Meinang walked into the bed curtains where Cui Xi and Cui Jian were waiting, and they helped her put on a red embroidered robe with lotus flowers and a pale pink skirt. She simply tied her hair in a cloud-style bun and didn’t bother with hairpins, jewelry, or flowers. She came out and bowed to Xu Jun Ying, who finally looked at her and gestured to the round table.

“Sit here. No tea. Let them leave,” he instructed.

Meinang understood the reason for his visit and was annoyed by his haughty attitude. She deliberately teased, “Does Lord Xu not want tea? I’m thirsty. Cui Xi, bring me a cup of hot tea.”

She was indeed thirsty, and since Xu Jun Ying did not seem to want to speak anytime soon, she didn’t want to endure the thirst. Cui Xi naturally didn’t just bring one cup but two, placing them in front of both of them before leaving.

Meinang said, “Lord Xu, please have tea,” and took a sip, only to immediately spit it out, waving her hand and calling out, “Cui Xi, you’re trying to kill me!”

Cui Xi rushed back in, “I’m sorry, did I burn you? Oh, what should I do?”

Meinang took a few deep breaths and waved her hand, “It’s fine. Just bring another cup.”

Cui Si had already replaced the tea and said, “This one has cooled down, madam, you can drink it now.”

Meinang nodded. “Good. You all may leave.”

Cui Xi and Cui Jian left, and Meinang took another sip. This time she tasted the tea, and after two more sips, she set the cup down.

Xu Jun Ying sat quietly, then asked, “Is it all right now? Can we talk?”

Meinang nodded, “Lord Xu, please speak.”

“You’re always like this, only realizing your mistakes after you’ve done them? Like with the tea you didn’t even check the cup and got burned. Before asking Jing Yu to help, did you consider whether her health could handle it? You argued with the second lady didn’t you foresee the consequences? Now, what will you do? The second lady and Jing Yu both don’t forgive you. If the second and first families are torn apart because of this, you’ll be the one at fault. You’ve disturbed the peace of this household during the New Year. The old lady is tolerating you. The second lady has been sick because of you. Don’t you understand the importance of family harmony? And you talk about managing the house.”

Meinang had imagined this confrontation many times, so she was mentally prepared. She listened to Xu Jun Ying’s sarcastic words, which seemed biased in favor of the second house, with no fairness at all. She managed to stay calm, lowering her head and admitting her mistakes with no anger.

“You’re right, Lord Xu. I shouldn’t have dragged Jing Yu with me to serve the elders and caused her to faint. I also shouldn’t have argued with the second lady and made her sick. Everything is my fault. The old lady and the first lady reprimanded and taught me this morning. I also apologized to the second lady and Jing Yu, but they refused to meet with me. However, they accepted the gifts I sent, which shows they’re willing to forgive me.”

Xu Jun Ying looked at her, irritated by her indifferent attitude, which made him angry. “How do you know they’ve forgiven you? You didn’t even show any sincerity. The gifts were just delivered and left, and you didn’t even say a word of apology. Jing Yu is a younger sister in law, so she can’t speak up. As for the second lady, if she didn’t want to meet you, you should have kneeled outside her room. She wouldn’t let you kneel for long. She would have forgiven you then. Is that not good? What should have been resolved today is now delayed until tomorrow. Every day of delay adds more resentment. Blood relations will become weaker, and you still don’t understand.”

Meinang’s head hung low, and finally, unable to hold it in any longer, she suddenly lifted her head, her eyes shining brightly, forcing Xu Jun Ying to look away.

She said, “Lord Xu, it seems like you’re accusing me of not being sincere. Who told you that? Do you believe everything others say? How do you know I didn’t try to show sincerity? I sincerely stood in front of the second lady for a long time and also in front of Jing Yu for a while. But they refused to see me. Why? Lord Xu doesn’t understand the situation, but if you want to know, I can explain. If you don’t want to hear it, then it’s fine.”

She paused and said, “Lord Xu, you should listen. The second lady came to confront me about Jing Yu fainting, but it was all made up. Jing Yu fainted because of her argument with the second master, not because of me. As for my argument with the second lady, I admit I was wrong, and I shouldn’t have been disrespectful to an elder. However, as an elder, she shouldn’t constantly bring up my family. What did my family ever do to her? Why is it that she can belittle my family, but I can’t speak of hers? She made herself sick, and now I have to kowtow to her? What if I die from anger? Who will take responsibility?”

Seeing the cold look in Xu Jun Ying’s eyes, Meinang realized her mistake and lowered her gaze, holding back her emotions.

After a while, she said, “I will apologize to the second lady again tomorrow.”

Xu Jun Ying replied, “Tomorrow, we’ll go together before I leave. We must resolve the second lady’s grievances. The Xu family has always valued etiquette. There has never been a case where a younger generation disrespects an elder. The old lady is deeply upset. You have ruined the New Year mood.”

Meinang bit her lip slightly. “Did I ruin it?” Xu Jun Ying had his own problems but blamed everything on her.

Still, she lowered her voice and apologized, “I’m sorry, I was too rash, causing Lord Xu trouble.”

As Xu Jun Ying stood to leave, he looked at her one last time and said coldly, “Qin Meinang, you are not a virtuous woman. I was wrong to marry you. I will look after your life and death, ensuring you live without worry. But now, I understand, in three to five months, I will marry someone else. The new wife will take over the management of the household. If you want to stay in Qing Hua Courtyard, you can. If you want to move to another courtyard, that’s fine too. No one will interfere with you. You can live however you want. However, the Xu family’s rules will still apply. You should stay in your courtyard, cultivate yourself, and avoid wandering in the garden to avoid offending anyone again. One mistake is forgiven, but not twice or thrice. Don’t blame anyone then.”

As Xu Jun Ying reached the door, Meinang softly spoke, halting his steps, “May I ask why?”

He turned and looked at her, “Why what?”

“Why do you want to marry someone else?” Meinang asked.

Xu Jun Ying’s voice was heavy. “Because you’re not a virtuous woman.”

After a long silence, Meinang simply replied, “I understand.”

The door closed, leaving her in the cold room, her thoughts a chaotic whirl.