Chapter 27: Clearing the Air

Xiao Qingru was waiting at the arts troupe for Xu Muzhou after work, as they’d planned to go to the cafeteria together. Not knowing exactly when he’d arrive, she passed the time practicing her dance. She had taken off her military coat, and as she moved with grace, all the light seemed to gather on her.

Xu Muzhou had seen her dance before, but he still couldn’t tear his gaze away. Noticing his intense stare, she turned and met his eyes, which held a swirling depth that seemed to shift something between them, something ready to burst forth.

Feeling flustered under his gaze, Xiao Qingru quickly gathered her things. “Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“No worries, I just got here myself.” Xu took her military coat draped over her arm and helped her put it on. “It’s cold outside don’t catch a chill.”

This unexpectedly intimate gesture made her pause, and for the first time, she felt a spark of realization. Her lashes fluttered, betraying her emotions as she looked up to meet his deep, intense gaze. It hit her then Xu Muzhou wasn’t treating her like a sister at all. He was a man with boundaries, someone who wouldn’t go out of his way for her without reason, and she should’ve realized it sooner.

“Let me handle it myself,” she said, unable to meet his eyes.

Xu’s throat bobbed as he muttered a quiet “Alright,” but he also knew it was time to open up. He’d been holding these feelings since the first time he saw her a year ago, but he didn’t want to pressure her.

The two walked side by side to the cafeteria, a respectful distance between them, though the atmosphere had subtly shifted. Xiao Qingru walked in silence, her mind elsewhere. Xu Muzhou didn’t disturb her, understanding she needed time to process.

“Careful,” he said as he caught her arm, preventing her from walking into a tree. Chuckling, he added, “Am I really so scary that you can’t even look up?”

For the first time, Xiao Qingru felt what true embarrassment was, and she quickly retorted, “Not scary just that your behavior is! I see you as a brother, but you… what do you think of me?”

“And what do you think I feel about you?” he teased, as if coaxing her into saying it outright.

“You know what I mean!” She felt like a cat with its fur on end.

Amused, he continued, “Don’t stop halfway finish your thought.”

Taking a deep breath, she decided to clear the air, despite her own hesitation. “Xu Comrade, I want to ask you something, and I hope you won’t mind.”

“Go ahead.”

“Do you… like me?”

Xu Muzhou, who was usually thick skinned, felt a blush creeping up as his beloved confronted him directly. But he didn’t avoid her question. “Yes, I do.”

Xiao Qingru pressed on, “You’re friends with my brother, but we barely had any contact before. Are you sure it’s me you like and not just the idea of having someone to date?”

Xu Muzhou reassured her, “It’s not impulsive. I’ve liked you since I first saw you perform. You’re exceptional, and you shine when you dance. It’s only natural that I’d notice you and feel this way.”

“What if I’m not exceptional someday?” she asked. “What if I quit dancing?”

Xiao Qingru thought if his interest was based solely on her dancing, there was no point in continuing this conversation.

“I won’t deny that’s how I noticed you, but please don’t think I’m that shallow,” Xu said earnestly. “It’s not just about dance it’s about you. If I were drawn to talent alone, I’d be exhausted from falling for everyone with a skill.”

Xiao Qingru almost smiled, her round eyes widening. “Xu Comrade, take this seriously!”

“Yes, ma’am!” he responded, feigning obedience.

She took a steadying breath. “You know I was engaged before and dated Jiang Chuan.”

“I know. That’s why I never approached you before or let on about my feelings,” he replied. His restraint had kept her comfortable, which is why she felt she owed him honesty.

Xiao Qingru knew she didn’t want Xu Muzhou feeling pressured either. Just as he’d left the choice to her, she hoped he wouldn’t feel bound to pursue her.

“I’m not ready to start something new right away,” she said.

Relieved, he nodded. “That’s fine with me. I won’t push you to decide anything. Just see me as any other suitor, and if someday you feel I’m worth it, give me a chance. That’s all.”

He almost won her over with his sincerity. “If that’s the case, then please don’t buy me things. Since we’re not dating, I shouldn’t be spending your money.”

“Alright, no more gifts.”

“I’m not sure if I’ll ever choose you.”

“That’s fine. Liking you didn’t require your permission, so if you ever want to turn me down, you don’t need mine. No pressure at all.”

This respect he showed her genuinely touched her.

Her relationship with Jiang Chuan had been so different. Jiang Chuan had always acted according to his own whims, disregarding others’ feelings, and even when entangled with Du Wanqiu, no one ever considered how Xiao Qingru felt.

If he’d respected her choice back then, things wouldn’t have ended so bitterly.

“Shall we go?” she asked, feeling a bit lighter.

“To the cafeteria?” he clarified, smiling as he sensed her openness to the idea of them.

It seemed the door to her heart was starting to open, and Xu Muzhou was ready to give his best, hoping someday to pass her test.