If the past secret crush was a kind of solitary courage, now there was one person sharing the heavy secret with her. She wasn’t ungrateful for it.

The next day, daylight came as usual. What she had witnessed the night before seemed like a disaster, but over time, it fermented. Whenever people around her talked about Han Chao, Qianye unconsciously tuned in, her senses sharp like an animal’s instinct. But these fragmented words could never piece together the full picture of the young man.

It was Zhao Nanzhuo who told her about what had been going on between Han Chao and Si Ru. Zhao Nanzhuo, with a righteous air, recounted how he had gradually coaxed the truth out of Han Chao.

Han Chao’s father was the branch manager of a bank, and Lin Si Ru’s parents were also senior bank officials, living in the same residential complex. The two families had always been close. After entering high school, Si Ru struggled academically, so her parents asked Han Chao to tutor her on weekends. Every Sunday evening, they sat under the same desk lamp, their heads bent over the same pages, focusing intently.

Si Ru wasn’t a particularly beautiful girl, but she was like a little flower growing in a corner of the wall—quiet and strong. After walking through a long barren period, suddenly, seeing this flower bloom in such isolation and determination was a kind of beauty that struck the heart.

Si Ru was the typical studious girl, quiet and obedient, but always struggled with math and science. She often fell behind in grades because of her poor performance in math, and would hold up failing papers, unable to stop the tears from falling.

Perhaps it was her stubbornness mixed with a helpless softness, and the way Han Chao looked at her with admiration as he quickly solved the problems for her. She suddenly fell in love with him, becoming the hero in her heart.

Qianye couldn’t help but imagine the scene of him tutoring her, how the desk lamp cast shadows that beautifully outlined his profile. He wrote out neat and detailed answers, helping her slowly understand the problems.

Tears welled up in Qianye’s eyes. At this moment, she hated herself for feeling the need to compete with him, trying to solve science problems more quickly than the boys. Was it because she wasn’t fragile enough that he didn’t love her? But it was because she lacked love that she forced herself to become strong. How else could she survive this cold life?

“Qianye…” Zhao Nanzhuo’s voice was hoarse, strong emotions choking him. He turned his face toward the night outside the window. “Don’t be sad. I’m here. I will always protect you,” he said sincerely, looking at her.

How many people in the world love those who don’t love them, silently wasting their youth in sorrow.

After that, Qianye refused to go back with Han Chao and the others. She wasn’t brave enough to be like the little mermaid, enduring the pain and slowly moving toward the prince she had admired from afar. From that moment on, she decided to walk alone. Since loneliness was her destiny, no one, except for him, could save her.

A week passed in the blink of an eye. After class, the Chinese teacher asked Qianye to find a classmate to help her transcribe student information in the office. Her Chinese teacher was also the homeroom teacher of the neighboring class. Qianye thought it was laughable—despite being in this miserable situation, she still couldn’t help but pay attention to every little detail related to him.

Qianye didn’t have many friends in class, so she dragged Zhou Ran along to the office.

The teacher gave each of them a stack of student information from Class 4 and asked them to transcribe it neatly into the forms. Qianye quickly searched for Han Chao’s form. She transcribed his details first—his parents’ names, their occupations, his phone number, family members, date of birth… She greedily devoured every piece of information related to him, like an ant that had fallen into honey. If her previous understanding of him had only been based on imagination and inquiry, now, with the black-and-white facts and his handwriting on the form, everything felt so real. Qianye felt a bittersweet sweetness flowing in her heart, as if she knew more about him than anyone else.

After finishing the transcription, they secretly went to the snack shop to buy two ice creams. During class time, the school grounds were particularly quiet. Ginkgo leaves fell onto the cement ground, long and mournful. They sat on the bench outside the shop, watching groups of students heading to physical education class, buying snacks. Zhou Ran’s eyes were slightly red, and Qianye looked at her with unease. But in this friendship, she had always been passive; she didn’t know how to awkwardly comfort others.

“Nanzhuo isn’t your real brother. Why didn’t you tell me earlier? Why?” Zhou Ran’s voice carried the early spring chill, cold and trembling. But it also seemed to contain a trace of hidden reluctance. She finally said the words she had been holding back.

Qianye knew that from this moment on, they might never be friends again. Zhou Ran had discovered from the student information that Qianye and Zhao Nanzhuo weren’t biologically related, but why hadn’t Qianye told her? She had let her believe that Nanzhuo was his sister, only for her to humbly confess all her feelings to him.

“I understand you, but I didn’t know how to tell you. It’s just been like this for years. And in my heart, I treat him like family. Besides, I truly like you.”

“Sometimes I really wish I were you, so I could always be by his side, openly.” Zhou Ran leaned on the desk and cried, her vanilla ice cream melting onto the floor.