Unable to sleep, he decided not to sleep at all.

An Yi spread out his sketchbook and spent the whole night practicing sketching with instructional videos he found online.

Ceramics involved both overglaze and underglaze coloring, requiring a certain level of artistic skill. Apart from a few years of interest classes during his brief student days, he relied on self-study and practice during his insomnia over the past few years.

Basic sketching exercises allowed him to focus on the lines and contours, making the time bearable.

An Yi sketched until dawn, quickly tidied up, and went to the hospital.

Actually, he didn’t need to be there.

Bone marrow infusion was done intravenously, conducted entirely within the transplant ward, and postoperatively, An Ya would continue to receive treatment and observation in the ward. On the surface, it was just another ordinary day.

But An Yi still arrived early and waited outside the transplant ward.

He needed to hear the news as soon as possible. He wanted to see Lin Yuming’s expression in person, to confirm that his sister was safe and sound.

The waiting process was agonizing, and the infusion didn’t start until noon.

An Yi sat in the stairwell the whole time, checking his phone occasionally before continuing to wait.

Lin Yuming invited him to the lounge to have lunch together, but An Yi couldn’t eat. His fingers trembled, and he couldn’t even hold the chopsticks steadily.

Lin Yuming comforted him, “Relax, bone marrow infusions usually don’t go wrong, and we’ll pay special attention to the subsequent treatment.”

“I’m worried about rejection and whether it will be very painful,” An Yi couldn’t control his trembling voice, barely finishing his sentence.

His mind was elsewhere, absentmindedly nodding as he asked, “Will it hurt when she receives the infusion?”

“It will definitely be a bit uncomfortable, but compared to the previous marrow-clearing treatment, it’s nothing,” Lin Yuming held his hand, “Rejection reactions won’t occur immediately, so you really don’t need to be so nervous.” He asked An Yi, “Have you continued taking your medication?”

An Yi’s mind was not on himself at all. He casually nodded and then asked, “How long will the infusion take? I haven’t video chatted with Xiao Ya today.”

“It should be almost done. I’ll ask my colleagues later,” Lin Yuming said. “She might be weak today, so let’s wait a couple of days for her white blood cell count to rise before we do a video call.”

This still didn’t dispel An Yi’s worries. He waited until the infusion was over, then asked Lin Yuming to bring a comforting note into the transplant ward to check on An Ya’s condition.

The infusion went smoothly, and An Ya was delighted to see the note. She even made a victory gesture, asking Lin Yuming to take a photo to show An Yi.

An Yi’s anxious heart finally relaxed after a day of tension.

Back in the apartment, he felt a faint sense of happiness slowly creeping in.

Since he turned 18, it had been difficult for him to truly relax, so this moment of happiness was truly precious.

He wanted to share it with someone. Besides An Ya, the first person who came to mind was Yan Chen.

An Ya’s successful transplantation was thanks to Yan Chen’s support behind the scenes, so it was only natural to inform Yan Chen about the transplant situation.

—An Yi found a powerful excuse to contact Yan Chen.

The phone rang five times. An Yi hesitated whether to hang up, but the call was answered.

Yan Chen’s impatient voice sounded somewhat distorted in the receiver: “What’s up?”

At the same time, a clear voice from a distance called out to Yan Chen, asking him, “How does this dress look?”

Yan Chen casually replied, “It’s good,” then moved away a bit with his phone and asked An Yi, “What’s going on?”

An Yi felt like his throat was being strangled. It took him a lot of effort to speak up. “…It’s Xiao Ya. Her infusion went well today, and I just wanted to let you know.”

“I see.” Yan Chen lowered his voice. “If there’s nothing else, I’ll hang up first. We’ll talk when I get back.”

An Yi quickly agreed and hung up. Afterward, he felt empty inside and didn’t move for a long time.

He tactfully didn’t bother Yan Chen further.

There were more important things in life waiting for him to attend to.

On the fifth day after the infusion, An Ya finally regained some energy and video called him.

The high-dose chemotherapy in the ward had caused the little girl, who was already thin, to lose nearly ten pounds. She lay on the hospital bed, looking like skin and bones. With many ulcers in her mouth, she winced in pain whenever she tried to speak.

An Yi felt heartbroken.

He consulted Lin Yuming about many questions and learned that at present, the only thing he could do for An Ya was to prepare high-protein meals to assist her in raising her white blood cell count as quickly as possible. So, An Yi spent the whole day experimenting with recipes in the kitchen.

Half a month after the infusion, An Ya’s white blood cell count began to rise slowly, indicating that the stem cells were engrafting.

Seeing that the discharge date was approaching, the siblings happily began to plan for their life after discharge. But one day, without warning, An Ya had nearly twenty episodes of diarrhea in a day, followed by vomiting and fever.

—This was a reaction to acute intestinal rejection.

Lin Yuming and the attending physician urgently treated An Ya, and the planned discharge date was postponed again and again.

In the days following the rejection reaction, An Ya continued to have a low fever, and the symptoms of vomiting and diarrhea persisted.

An Yi panicked.

He suspected that the meals he had prepared were not good, leading to An Ya’s gastrointestinal discomfort.

Although Lin Yuming told him many times that rejection reactions were common complications of bone marrow transplants and had little to do with diet, he inevitably fell into a deep sense of self-blame and guilt.

He wandered outside the transplant ward day and night like a headless fly, feeling helpless that he couldn’t help at all. He felt like a worthless person.

An Yi found many articles online and read them while eating and walking. The more he read, the more anxious and helpless he felt.

He wanted to seek help from other experts, but An Ya’s current attending physician was already a top expert in this field. If even this person found the case tricky, who else could take over?

Who could help him?

Who could save An Ya?

……………..

An Yi felt at a loss, holding the thermos flask and got off the bus.

The engines and honking of cars on the road felt like heavy blows to his eardrums, making him uncomfortable.

He lowered his head and quickened his pace. Just as he was about to turn into the hospital gate, a sharp, prolonged honk pierced the air, startling him. Almost simultaneously, a strong hand forcefully pulled him backward.

An Yi stumbled, his back unexpectedly hitting a powerful chest.

“Are you okay?”

An Yi turned around, his eyes filled with confusion.

Qin Muye dragged him to the side of the road. After the car that had urgently stopped had driven away, he released An Yi and smiled. “Why are you looking at me like that? Don’t you remember me?”

An Yi did feel a bit strange. They hadn’t been in contact since their last skiing trip.

“Why have you lost so much weight?” Qin Muye frowned, noticing his paleness. “Did Yan Chen give you a hard time again?”

An Yi shook his head, preoccupied with delivering food to his sister. He murmured a “thank you” and turned to leave, almost colliding with a passing bicycle.

Qin Muye promptly grabbed him, saying worriedly, “Let me accompany you.”

An Yi refused, fearing Yan Chen would be unhappy if he found out. But seeing his absent-mindedness and the trembling of his hands hidden in his sleeves, Qin Muye insisted on escorting him.

The distance from the hospital gate to the inpatient building was only about two hundred meters, the road was flat, and there weren’t many pedestrians. However, An Yi found it quite difficult to walk.

When he almost tripped over the curb for the third time, Qin Muye couldn’t bear it anymore.

He took the thermos from An Yi’s hand, held it in front of him, and asked in a deep voice, “Xiao An, what’s wrong with you?”

“I’m fine,” An Yi frowned. “Give me back the flask, or it’ll get cold.”

“I’ll hold it for you,” Qin Muye said. “In case you fall, what will your sister eat?”

An Yi didn’t argue anymore and went with Qin Muye to deliver the food outside the transplant ward.

Learning that his sister’s fever had risen again in the morning, An Yi’s face turned pale, and his vision darkened. Qin Muye quickly supported him.

Coincidentally, Lin Yuming came out of the ward to change shifts and hurried over when he saw the scene.

“What’s wrong?”

Seeing An Yi’s terrifyingly pale face, Lin Yuming used a stethoscope to check his rapid heartbeat. “Why is your heart rate so fast? Are you feeling unwell anywhere else?!”

Qin Muye recounted what happened when he met An Yi earlier. An Yi blinked slowly, struggling to speak. “I’m fine. Maybe I just didn’t eat breakfast and have low blood sugar.”

Lin Yuming didn’t think it was that simple.

He and Qin Muye helped him to the nearby resting room. Lin Yuming got a piece of chocolate from the nurse for An Yi to eat, while Qin Muye went to buy him breakfast.

An Yi only took two bites before vomiting.

“Sorry.” He hurried to the bathroom to rinse his mouth and wash his face, scrubbing the dirt off his clothes.

When he looked up, he met Lin Yuming’s probing and worried gaze in the mirror.

An Yi forced a bleak smile. “I’m really fine.”

Lin Yuming frowned. “Last time I asked if you continued taking your medication, you lied to me, didn’t you?”

An Yi lowered his head and cupped some water, washing his face. “Coincidentally, I ran out of medicine at home and was thinking of taking advantage of this opportunity to stop. So, I haven’t been taking it.”

“Your withdrawal symptoms are too severe,” Lin Yuming frowned. “Now, An Ya hasn’t passed the danger period yet. If something happens to you, what will she do?”

“It’s not that serious. Now is the time when money is needed. I can hold on,” An Yi said.

“Come to me if you need money, I…”

“I’m not short of money, I just can’t afford to think about these things, Yuming,” An Yi straightened his back. Lin Yuming couldn’t see his face in the mirror, only his fingers curled on the sink, pale to the bone. “I don’t want to sleep, can’t close my eyes. I’m afraid of having nightmares. I’m afraid… afraid that one day, when I open my eyes, I’ll find out that those nightmares are real.”

Lin Yuming hesitated, unable to find words in the face of such heavy despair.

Despite studying medicine for all these years, he thought he had become indifferent to life and death. But seeing An Yi like this, he still felt sorrow and bitterness.

An Yi took a few deep breaths and turned around.

“Yuming, can you tell me the truth? How severe is An Ya’s rejection?”

Under the gaze of those bloodshot eyes, Lin Yuming’s throat tightened, unable to utter a word.

Yet in this oppressive silence, he managed to convey all the cruel possibilities.