Chapter 35: Loquat Fruit (Part 9)

“Disciple doesn’t dare.” Shen Suwei lowered his head, knowing he had overstepped. Xu Binglai was angry.
Xu Binglai tiredly propped his forehead with his hand. “What’s wrong with you?”

Xu Qianyu couldn’t have suddenly mastered the sword. He now recalled the sword intent that broke through the barrier; there was a familiar shadow within it—something he had taught Shen Suwei years ago.

Shen Suwei risked angering him to help this wild girl, which left him baffled. Shen Suwei always had a reason for his actions. Either he acted this way because Xu Qianyu was his daughter, which was clearly unreasonable. If he were trying to please him, then why had he initially refused to marry Qianqian?
Or, Shen Suwei sympathized with her, feeling guilty towards her.

Though these two points seemed absurd, they indeed occurred.
Shen Suwei kneeled and said, “Disciple merely offered some guidance and did not do anything special. Up to today, she has largely relied on herself.”

He wasn’t wrong in what he said. He hadn’t given her any spiritual energy or magic tools. He had only provided some pointers, but if Xu Qianyu hadn’t cooperated, it wouldn’t have worked out.
That said, he was usually cool and distant; he didn’t typically offer such careful guidance to others.

Xu Binglai regretted letting Shen Suwei handle this matter. Compared to Xu Qianyu, his disciple, whom he had painstakingly cultivated to the Golden Core stage, was evidently much more valuable and shouldn’t be let down.
“I ordered you to bring her back. It has nothing to do with you. By all accounts, you’ve helped her keep her life. You owe her nothing.”

Shen Suwei remained silent for a while but replied, “These are two separate matters. They cannot offset each other; they can only balance.”

“Why can’t they offset?” Xu Binglai said. “For her, leaving home is a loss, but saving her life brings more benefit. In accumulation, she still gains, and that benefit comes from you. Isn’t that enough?”
He often felt that Shen Suwei analyzed things too intricately, overthinking and worrying too much. If it were him, he probably would have been overwhelmed.
But seeing Shen Suwei silent, he sighed and said, “If you keep balancing this way, when will you ever pay it back?”
He was asking when Shen Suwei’s unusual behavior would cease.
Shen Suwei said, “When the disciple’s heart is at peace.”
Xu Binglai noticed this usually steady third disciple had an unusual, foggy look in his dark eyes, rarely seen: “Since I arrived at the Shui family, upon seeing the sword hanging on the wall and encountering Xu Qianyu, I felt uneasy.”

He also felt heartache.
However, this pain was inexplicable, and he wouldn’t speak of it until he understood the reason.
Xu Binglai suddenly felt guilty.

Shen Suwei had suffered too much as a child and had some emotional knots. Xu Binglai felt he must have seen the heartbreaking scenes of separation and loss at the Shui family, which triggered some hidden feelings, and this was a debt he owed, unrelated to Shen Suwei; it shouldn’t be repaid by this disciple. He said:
“I have already promised her to release her. Once she reaches the Qi refining stage, she can enter the outer sect. If you want to watch over her, then do so.”
But Shen Suwei stared ahead, not smiling, showing no joy. His eyes were deep, still frozen as if trapped in ice and snow.

Xu Binglai thought that Suwei was unhappy about losing control.
Sure enough, the next moment he said he had finished practicing “Liuhe Ruthless” and requested his master to grant him the sword manual and mental techniques.

Xu Binglai had already selected these for him long ago, but now, holding them in his palm, he was reluctant to give them: “Have you been having severe nightmares again lately?”
Shen Suwei lowered his lashes and remained silent. It was evident that he had, but he didn’t think much of it.

“Although I may not be as insightful as you, I’ve lived a hundred years longer.” Xu Binglai glanced at him coldly. “It’s not that I’m completely ignorant, but I do understand that all things ultimately seek a state of ‘going with the flow.’ If you feel uncomfortable, don’t force it, and definitely don’t suppress it forcibly; otherwise, you will suffer the consequences. Among the Six Paths, martial arts is also suitable for you; it doesn’t have to be the path of indifference. Think it through.”
Shen Suwei looked at him, his obsidian-like pupils revealing a hint of stubbornness: “What I seek in my heart is nothing but the Great Way.”
“I know,” Xu Binglai sighed helplessly and told him to take the book away.
Shen Suwei was a rare talent, a swordsman in the making, with diligence that exceeded others; it was merely his emotional knots that were holding him back. If he could sever his ties to the six emotions and desires, with his swordsmanship and disposition, he would undoubtedly rise rapidly to the top of the path.
From this perspective, the path of indifference is indeed the most expedient. The previous few Dao Monarchs in the Transformational Realm all came from the path of indifference.
But Xu Binglai always believed that people are, after all, humans. Forcibly suppressing emotions might not be bad in itself, but it certainly feels wrong.
Shen Suwei was obstinately going his own way; even now, he was inclined to assist Xu Qianyu, which was probably to sever his emotional ties and clear his mind as soon as possible.
He even advised his master that the sixth formula of the Six Harmonies, named ‘All Things Give Birth,’ was not truly indifferent. It simply embodies a benevolence that shines upon all things without any selfish desires.
Xu Binglai nodded. “It’s good that you’ve gained this insight. Just as you said, wanting to help others and feeling compassion belongs to the benevolence toward all things. I won’t interfere, nor will I blame you, but don’t be too hard on yourself either.”
After saying this, he also provided some elixirs and incense for stabilizing the mind.
Shen Suwei opened the sword manual and took a look; this new sword technique was called “Sever Thoughts, Cut Feelings.”
Practicing it felt quite cold, but it was bearable. He quickly broke through to the ninth level, feeling as if he had fallen into an ice cave.
That night, he had a nightmare.
But it was not the usual ones.
In the dream, he sat indoors, removing his soft outer garment and laying it on the ground. He then took out a piece of white bone from his storage pouch and carefully placed it on his robe. He didn’t know what kind of bone it was, but it was an eerie pale color, clean, and seemed to have aged. Quite strange.
He counted as he took them out—over two hundred pieces of various sizes, and the last piece was a skull.

He placed the skull in the center.
Shen Suwei felt a buzzing in his heart. This was human bone.
Then he took a large, square water mirror from the side.
This mirror was polished from spirit stones and was clearer than any copper or mercury mirror from the mortal realm, even capable of reflecting spiritual energy. It was often used to set up water mirror battle formations or as decoration for prison cells. It was rare to find one cut into a separate piece.
In the dream, he leaned this mirror against the wall, concealing the bones in the angle between the mirror and the wall.

A person, a mirror, and a pile of bones sat silently in the room.
Shen Suwei truly didn’t know what he was doing, but the mirror should reflect his appearance, so he glanced into it.
He saw only the robe, white as snow, layered on the ground, embroidered with golden threads, shimmering with flowing patterns. It was the kind of luxurious splendor he feared the most.
Why was he dressed like this?
But when he looked up, he was even more astonished; the person in the mirror looked like him yet did not: his hair was tied up, wearing a glazed purple jade crown, and his demeanor was imposing. His face was cold, his lips a reddish hue, but his pupils were as black and round as in childhood, as if he could not see.
At first glance, it was a bizarre mix of sinister and ominous energy, extremely discordant, making one’s heart race with fear.
The dream ended.
Suddenly, he felt a surge from his insides and wiped his lips with his hand. In the darkness, without needing to look, he could smell the rust from his fingertips and knew it was blood.
He had broken through.
After such a peculiar dream, the ninth level of “severe thoughts, cut feelings” inexplicably collapsed, breaking silently. If he wanted to practice again, he would have to start from the first level.
*
After Xu Qianyu left, Xu Binglai tossed and turned, a phrase lingering in his mind: “starvation.”
How could such a large Penglai Immortal Sect reach the point of starvation?
He called Lin Jin. This person was an elder in the disciple hall, overseeing all internal affairs and responsible for the disciples’ meals.
He asked, “What do the disciples usually eat?”
Lin Jin replied, “What the sect provides should be grains, along with some taro and corn.”
Xu Binglai had fasted for nearly a hundred years and vaguely remembered what those foods looked like, but he had long forgotten their taste. He glanced sideways, “Are they good?”
Lin Jin fell silent.
“Just tell me whether it’s good or not,” Xu Binglai said irritably.
Lin Jin explained, “Most disciples have already fasted. Those who haven’t shouldn’t starve with these foods. Meals tend to increase the turbid energy; the Four Great Immortal Sects are all like this.”
“…” Xu Binglai said, “Add some more, just a bit of something palatable. We wouldn’t want others outside saying that we’re starving in the Penglai Immortal Sect.”
That day, Xu Binglai and a few elders left the sect to attend a banquet.

As they walked along, they passed by the training grounds of the outer disciples. Suddenly, all the disciples started running in a certain direction. Those who could fly were soaring in the air, creating a chaotic scene. One disciple rushed up to him, knelt, and saluted, “Sect Master.”
But before he could get up, the disciples behind him were running too fast and accidentally tripped over him, causing several people to fall in a heap.
Xu Binglai took a surprised step back, his expression freezing.
Are these disciples of the sect? They look more like monkeys from the mountains.
“What’s going on? What happened to them?”
Lin Jin replied, “Reporting to the Sect Master, today just happens to be the day when the dining hall serves braised pork knuckles; they must be rushing to grab some. If they arrive late, there won’t be any left.”
“Pork knuckles?” Xu Binglai raised an eyebrow, his face extremely cold.
“A type of food,” Lin Jin quietly reminded him. “It’s a part of a pig, and you previously said you wanted to add some…”
“I know what pork knuckles are!” Xu Binglai waved his sleeve angrily. “I’m asking if they are that good. Is it necessary to lose composure like this?”
He heard Fang Zheng and a few others laughing behind him, “It seems that even after fasting, they can’t withstand their appetites.”
“Exactly, exactly.”
“We don’t mind, mainly because of these youngsters. They’re growing and have a craving for meat; they wouldn’t be able to bear it if they didn’t eat.”
Xu Bing watched his disciples running around, recalling Xu Qianyu’s mournful eyes. Without saying a word, he turned coldly and went back.
Could it be that he was truly in the wrong?
Was there really no exquisite food in the immortal sect? Of course there was. When the leaders and elders of various sects gathered to discuss matters, they would lay out a table full of delicacies, as exquisite as those in mortal restaurants.
The main purpose was to enhance the atmosphere and create a grand spectacle. The powerful ones had long since stopped eating, focusing mainly on the discussions without picking up their chopsticks.
Therefore, hosting a banquet was considered an unimportant detail compared to the serious business of cultivation. Such trivial matters were always entrusted to Shen Suwei, who could arrange everything meticulously.
Now, the trivial matter had suddenly become significant.
Xu Bing called for Shen Suwei.
Shen Suwei stood before the menu, silent.
He had organized banquets for nine, sixteen, and twenty-five people, each with its own regulations.
But what kind of arrangement would be appropriate for Xu Qianyu alone?
He remembered the usual dishes from the Shui family, where lunch consisted of twelve dishes and dinner six, along with additional snacks and pastries. But that was for an entire family to dine together.
It was difficult to go from luxury to simplicity. She was going to join the outer sect, and sooner or later, she would have to eat in the dining hall, and in the future, she would need to stop eating grains, so it shouldn’t be too extravagant.
He began by drafting four dishes and a soup.
Since the restrictions were lifted, someone had been knocking on the door.
When Xu Qianyu opened the door, she was surprised to see the servants entering one after another, carrying a variety of dishes. In no time, the table was filled with cold tossed green bamboo shoots, crab meat tofu, candied lotus seeds, braised carp, and fragrant white rice.
Not to mention her, even the old lady’s eyes widened, and she ended up eating two extra bowls of rice, scraping her bowl clean.
Xu Qianyu felt the same.
She got hungry quickly from sword practice, and now with such meals, she felt more motivated to train.
But after two days of this, the old lady pulled her aside and wouldn’t let her eat too much. The ordinary food from the human world could increase turbid energy, which was not conducive to cultivating a clear heart.
Xu Qianyu could only eat until she was half full.
She accepted this quickly. After such a long time without these foods, overeating would make her feel greasy and uncomfortable, so she craved some ice cream or sweet pastries even more.
She noticed that every time the servants came, there was a piece of paper on the tray, and when the plates were collected, the paper was taken away.
This time, she took the paper out and wrote down what she wanted to eat: “Osmanthus Cool Cake,” then tentatively placed it back when the plates were being collected.
The servant collecting the plates glanced at her oddly but didn’t stop her.
Shen Suwei silently looked at the piece of paper.
This paper was originally meant for insulation, but since Xu Qianyu wrote on it, the servant had to keep it, fearing it was some important message, and handed it over to him instead.
The “important message” turned out to be the name of a dessert.
When ordering meals again, he scanned the menu and selected the Osmanthus Cool Cake.
Xu Qianyu was overjoyed to find that the next day’s meal included the jelly.
From then on, she indulged herself, writing down whatever she wanted, and her requests were basically met.
But sometimes there were exceptions.
She became too demanding. Shen Suwei looked at the piece of paper, which was filled on both sides with names of dishes, with a row of cramped letters squeezed in the side: “Sweet Rice Wine and Glutinous Rice Balls.”
It was clearly beyond the limit; she could only choose one.
Which one should he select?
Shen Suwei stroked the piece of paper, pondering for a long time. The cramped letters at the edge must represent her strongest desire.
Let’s go with this one.
When the small bowl was uncovered, Xu Qianyu finally got the glutinous rice balls with sweet rice wine that she had dreamed of the night before.