Proofreader/Editor:

 Nene Yashiro

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I Am Tang Jiwei

Tang Jiwei leaned against the doorframe as he walked out and saw his mother washing clothes. He gave her a fragile smile, but his eyes were filled with tenderness.

“Mother, you should use hot water in the this cold weather”

Madam Xiao wiped the sweat from her forehead and smiled at her frail son. “I’m sweating here, child, it’s not cold at all. You should go back inside and rest. The doctor said you’ll need to recuperate for at least half a year!”

Tang Jiwei managed to support himself on the doorframe without too much difficulty. Madam Xiao explained that he had fallen from the mountain and broken his leg. If it weren’t for the nearby barefoot doctor’s quick intervention, he might’ve been crippled for the rest of his life.  Additionally, there was residual blood in his brain, causing him problem in recalling past events.

Tang Jiwei—formerly Gu Zhenguan—smiled and nodded. Yes, all those memories of the dark prison were now far behind him.

But while broken legs can heal, and blood clots can dissolve, how does one cure a broken heart?

Once, the person he fought alongside with, his childhood companion, had ruthlessly pushed him into an abyss of no return. Now, in this new life, he was haunted by endless nightmares. How could he ever repay such  “kindness”?

“Child, are you having a headache again? I told you to listen to the doctor—don’t let the cold wind get to you!” Madam Xiao, noticing her son’s change in expression, thought his old illness had flared up. She quickly set aside the half-washed clothes, wiped her hands, and helped him back inside.

“Mother, I’m fine. I was just thinking about the past,” Tang Jiwei said as he lay down, forcing a pale smile to reassure his doting mother.

Madam Xiao tucked him in securely and patted his hand. “Why dwell on the past? What’s done is done. What matters now is your health. Don’t forget you’re planning to take the provincial exam! With half a year left, recover well and bring honor to the Tang family. Your father can rest in peace once you succeed.”

Madam Xiao grew somber at the mention of Tang Jiwei’s late father. Once a loving couple, now she was left to manage everything alone, raising their son. The hardships she endured could never be fully expressed.

“Mother, take care of yourself, too. I’ll definitely pass the provincial exam. Soon, you’ll be the proud mother of a successful scholar, and everyone will hold you in high esteem!” Tang Jiwei, possessing the soul of the cunning and ambitious Gu Zhenguan, knew exactly what weighed on his mother’s heart.

After all, Madam Xiao was only thirty-six, and no matter how strong and tough she appeared, she must have swallowed her tears in silence more times than anyone could know. A husband is the pillar of a family, and theirs had lost that pillar long ago. Widow and orphan, they had endured years of neglect and disdain, but now that Tang Jiwei had earned the title of scholar, the local ruffians no longer dared to harass them.

“As long as you’re well, that’s all that matters to me. You don’t need to envy those wealthy academy students. A hero is not defined by his background. My son is the best. Even if we can’t afford to send you to Nanzhou right now, we’ll go once I save up enough money,” Madam Xiao declared, her voice full of bold determination.

Gu Zhenguan—no, he was now Tang Jiwei—would never allow his mother to continue washing clothes for others to support him. He had borrowed this body, and from now on, he was Tang Jiwei, the humble scholar.

Gu Zhenguan had always been a prodigy, mastering both literature and military strategy. His mentor, a renowned Confucian scholar hired by his father, once said that he was destined to soar through the clouds like a dragon.

At that time, he was the only son of Prime Minister Gu, the nephew of the Empress, and a childhood companion who studied alongside the princes. His brilliance and handsome appearance made him stand out in the capital, outshining all other noble sons. Even the princes dared not underestimate him. .

And yet, it was in this life of glory that he crossed paths with Han Zhen—the disgraced prince who had lost both his mother and his claim to the throne at a young age. Born into a prestigious lineage, Han Zhen’s future dimmed when his mother’s family fell from grace, and the Emperor remarried, leaving him utterly out of favor.

The arrogant young lord met the cold, neglected prince. Gu Zhenguan, once full of sympathy, gradually fell for Han Zhen. Over ten years, he devoted everything to him, even persuading his father to support Han Zhen’s bid for the throne.

But the outcome was far more brutal than he had ever imagined. Perhaps he had always known, but he had refused to believe it, holding on to the hope that Han Zhen would spare him. He hoped it was all part of some grander plan to topple a rival. Yet in the end, it was a scheme meticulously crafted for his own downfall. He lost everything, even his life.

Lying on the slightly damp bed, Gu Zhenguan, now Tang Jiwei, pondered all of this. His heart was filled with both bitterness and helplessness. He had stood by Han Zhen for ten years—how could ambition and cruelty drive him to snuff out his life as if he were no more than an ant?

He remembered the words of Official Zheng: “The greater your accomplishments, the sooner you’ll meet your end.”

Gu Zhenguan sneered. Without his support, how could a forgotten prince have ascended to the throne?

As he drifted into sleep on another night in this new life, haunted by regret and the tears at the corners of his eyes, he could not shake the question: Why?

—

**Heyang Palace**

The palace was brightly lit, and stacks of memorials covered the emperor’s desk. Eunuchs ^[1]Eunuch- a castrated male palace attendant and palace maids bustled about silently, afraid to make a sound. Even the Empress and concubines could not persuade the Emperor to rest. He remained sleepless, endlessly reviewing documents.

On the agarwood desk, piles of memorials were scattered, and Han Zhen held a vermilion brush, reviewing them with furrowed brows. His stern face was expressionless, and the eunuch on night duty dared not make a sound, silently pouring tea and standing still. Palace maids quietly replaced the spent red candles with new ones.

“Your Majesty, it’s time to rest,” Chief Eunuch Li Sheng gently reminded. He had served the emperor for twenty years, so he had a bit more leeway to speak than the average servant.

“I’m not tired yet. There’s been flooding in the south, so why didn’t anyone report it during the court session? Summon the Minister of Revenue ^[2]Minister of Revenue-  a person who oversees taxation and economic growth immediately!” Han Zhen lifted his head and stretched his neck. His hair, bound in a golden crown, was neat and cold, like the smoothest but most frigid silk. His robust frame only added to the overwhelming sense of authority he exuded.

“But, Your Majesty, the palace gates are already locked…”

Han Zhen stood up, casting a cold glance. Li Sheng shuddered and quickly ordered someone to fetch the Minister of Revenue. Even though he had served the emperor since childhood, Li Sheng could never predict his master’s unpredictable temper. Just look at what happened to Lord Gu back then… sigh.