Chapter 11

“Really? No,” Bai Wei tried to steer the conversation away.

Lu Sen said, “You ate very little for dinner, were not very enthusiastic during the kiss, and every night, you read books. But today, you didn’t.”

“Occasionally, I just lose my appetite, occasionally I don’t feel like reading. Don’t you believe in the existence of coincidence in this world?”

Bai Wei continued to ignore him. But Lu Sen acted like he didn’t understand: “But today, it’s clearly not about coincidence.”

Oh my God, why does he always have to dig deeper? Bai Wei felt annoyed, even a little angry.

They could have had a peaceful night. Lu Sen could read his book while Bai Wei thought about what to do tomorrow. No arguments, no conflicts. Bai Wei could even observe whether Lu Sen was crafty or not. But all of this was ruined by Lu Sen’s incessant probing.

“If I didn’t say anything, how could you assume I’m not happy?” Bai Wei said.

Bai Wei was obviously even more upset than before. Lu Sen was confused, not knowing what he had done wrong.

Lu Sen was born deep in the ocean, without parents. Even when he worked as a mercenary in human form, he only built utilitarian relationships with his teammates. He knew that human property and social status were passed on through the “family” bond. To settle down and develop in human society, building relationships, wealth, and status, joining a human family was the best choice.

Bai Wei was elegant, calm, good-natured, emotionally stable, learned, and came from an ancient family. Coincidentally, he was also Lu Sen’s fiancée. There was no one more suitable than Bai Wei to “settle down” with. Moreover, Bai Wei was beautiful, and having him was a great thing for Lu Sen.

This is what Lu Sen had once thought.

Now, Bai Wei had sent him the “build a happy family” signal. Lu Sen then discovered another layer of meaning to “family” for humans — beyond the combination of property, status, and relationships. He didn’t understand this new definition, but Bai Wei’s care for him made him feel great, so he began trying to play the role of “good husband.”

Lu Sen knew he knew nothing about this. But he was eager to learn, so he read novels and watched TV shows to learn what a good husband should do. For example, today, he cared about Bai Wei’s emotions, feeling that he had done nothing wrong.

He didn’t understand why Bai Wei was becoming more upset.

“Alright, but I felt it,” Lu Sen said.

“But will this affect you in any way?” Bai Wei asked.

Lu Sen was silent for a moment. He seemed to be thinking, and after a while, he said, “Theoretically, it shouldn’t affect anything.”

Bai Wei washed his face in front of the sink and glanced at the gas stove. Using the excuse of buying groceries in the morning to kill Lu Sen with gas poisoning seemed like a good option. But the problem was, he had argued with Lu Sen today—he didn’t want to commit murder in such an obvious way.

So the following week would be more peaceful—Bai Wei decided to leave the problem to time. When he was younger, his parents often fought, but after returning to his grandfather’s house, there were never any arguments, as all disputes were handled by family rules. The way Bai Wei could think of to smooth over this argument was to wait until the house renovation was finished.

When that day came, he could reasonably use the excuse of liking the new house’s renovation to “reconcile” with Lu Sen, and then continue with his murder plan.

Bai Wei turned over to turn off the light, and Lu Sen was still looking at his phone. After the room darkened, he heard Lu Sen’s muffled voice: “Did we argue tonight?”

Before Bai Wei could answer, Lu Sen continued, “We didn’t say much, didn’t fight, but I feel like this is an argument.”

Bai Wei: …

If Lu Sen hadn’t asked so many questions, they could have avoided making the atmosphere that bad! Once Bai Wei calmed down, he could gently tell Lu Sen, “You worked hard cooking, I still want to eat the food you make. I’ll go buy groceries tomorrow; you stay home and rest,” and then open the gas valve the next morning when he left.

But Lu Sen kept talking too much. He put Bai Wei in a difficult position, broke the “harmonious atmosphere” in their home, and even had to delay his murder plan.

Bai Wei lay in bed, getting angrier. He was starting to lose track of his own feelings. After all, Lu Sen would die sooner or later, and he was still angry at him. This reminded him of his first intended target.

A homeless man outside the Black Harbor City TV station building.

This homeless man did drugs, gambled, and went to prison for molesting children when he was young. After being released from prison, he set up camp outside the TV station where Bai Wei worked, spitting everywhere, acting as an exhibitionist, harassing Bai Wei’s colleagues and subordinates, and began stalking an intern. Bai Wei called the police several times, stuffed him in a sack twice, and threw him into a homeless shelter in Black Harbor City, but the man left the shelter twice and returned to the TV station.

Bai Wei was very angry at him, but that anger quickly dissipated after he decided to murder him.

But for Lu Sen, no matter how he planned his murder, Bai Wei would still feel angry at him. Bai Wei knew that starting to ease the atmosphere now might speed up his murder plan for Lu Sen.

But he couldn’t say it. Bai Wei, who was determined and willing to make various sacrifices to achieve his goals, couldn’t bring himself to speak.

Lu Sen continued: “I’ve been thinking about it for a long time. You’re upset, but it won’t affect me. But I’ll feel very sad. I don’t know why. On one hand, when I see you unhappy, I feel sad myself. I think maybe it’s because I feel sorry for you.”

… He could have kept quiet. Bai Wei gritted his teeth.

Lu Sen added: “On the other hand, I feel sad because you’re clearly unhappy but won’t say why. So, maybe tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, or a few days later, you’ll still be upset about the same thing. Thinking of this makes me sad.”

Bai Wei: …

“Don’t you think the one who ruined the atmosphere is you?” Bai Wei said. “If you hadn’t asked about this, we could have peacefully gotten through tonight.”

“But you will still be unhappy,” Lu Sen said.

“But I won’t say it,” Bai Wei replied.

“Why won’t you say it? You’re clearly unhappy.”

The topic circled back to the first issue. At that moment, Bai Wei thought about his family—the original one, with him and his mother and father, back in Bai Hai. His parents had betrayed their family and eloped here to settle. They fought and spoke every day.

Until they cracked each other’s skulls with a vase, and his mother moved with him to Hei Gang.

Life in Hei Gang was quiet in a way he had never experienced before. His mother, Bai Ju, was a pale and silent woman. On days when she wasn’t arguing with his father, she hardly spoke. Occasionally, she let Bai Wei see old photos of her. She had short hair and wore men’s clothes, posing under the climbing ivy at the naval academy, looking quiet and stubborn.

“At that time, I was your father’s pride,” his mother murmured as she stared at the photo for a long time before gently speaking. “Do you know? My father never called me ‘daughter.’ He always called me ‘son,’ saying I was his pride.”

“I was wrong. I couldn’t argue with him. I couldn’t go back. I’m not the captain of my life; I can only stay here and die in a foreign land.”

Later, his mother died of illness. He had lived with her corpse for more than a week until the neighbors smelled the odor in the summer and discovered that the child was the only one cleaning his mother’s body every day. The neighbors called the police, and it was then that Bai Wei first met his grandfather.

His grandfather leaned on a cane. For a moment, he looked as if he had collapsed, but soon he regained his dignity and took Bai Wei back to their home.

Bai Wei never argued with his grandfather. The Bai family’s thick rules were the guiding principles of everyday life. And many “small matters” weren’t worth arguing about. Besides, his grandfather had managed to hold onto such a large family business despite his lameness, which proved his correctness.

But Bai Wei’s current family was a mess. There were no principles, no plans, and no future. He didn’t want to argue with Lu Sen over trivial things because he didn’t know how to argue, and he had already planned to murder Lu Sen.

Lu Sen said, “Is it because the repair shop is too small? In a few days, we’ll be able to move back home.”

“…”

Lu Sen continued, “Is it because you’re worried about the income from the repair shop? I’ve been thinking that opening a bed-and-breakfast in town might be a good option.”

“…”

Lu Sen said, “Or is it because you feel insecure about your low libido? Darling, I’ll figure out a solution soon…”

Bai Wei could no longer tolerate it. He threw off the blanket and turned to Lu Sen, “How could you put all the ingredients for beef stew with red wine into instant noodles?!”

Lu Sen: “Huh?”

Bai Wei: “And you added a sauerkraut seasoning packet? I told you I wanted to make beef stew with red wine tonight.”

“…I put red wine in the noodles too,” Lu Sen said.

Bai Wei’s stomach started to feel uncomfortable. He thought desperately, he had actually eaten that thing tonight.

Lu Sen scratched his head, “I thought this would be more nutritious. Sorry. Does it taste bad to humans?”

Bai Wei: …

He was just talking nonsense. Bai Wei took a deep breath, and finally, he managed to calm down. “Honey, I overreacted.”

“I’m going to kill you in three days.”

“Oh, this isn’t overreacting,” Lu Sen said seriously, “Eating is very important. I’ve seen a lot of people die from hunger.”

Lu Sen said this sincerely. When he first set foot on land and randomly assumed a human form, he found himself in a war-torn country. There, he had indeed seen many people die from hunger.

It was also at that time that he realized how important eating, living, sleeping, and going to the bathroom were—for humans and for monsters like him, who had no kin.

Bai Wei felt irritated, but also a little sad. He didn’t know why Lu Sen’s words made him feel so uncomfortable. He buried himself under the blanket, pretending to be asleep.

“Please forgive me. I’ll cook for you every day,” Lu Sen said earnestly. “Although I don’t know what kind of food tastes better, I’ll try every day.”

Bai Wei didn’t respond. He just pretended to be asleep and buried himself in the blanket.

They were both in the bed, but they were in separate blankets, with different bedding between them.

—He was safe, Bai Wei thought.

The next morning, Bai Wei woke up first. He looked at Lu Sen lying in a sprawled position beside him, thinking about what had happened last night.

It seemed this argument was over, Bai Wei thought.

But when he left the kitchen to go to the market, Bai Wei took a few steps back.

He turned off the gas valve he had opened earlier.

The renovation took longer than Bai Wei had expected. He and Lu Sen had stayed in the repair shop for another ten days. After ten days of eating the meals Lu Sen had prepared, Bai Wei finally couldn’t take it anymore.

—–

On a sunny Wednesday morning, he woke up early under the pretense of going to buy vegetables, and before leaving, he turned on the gas valve again.