Su Xiangwan, like many single women in her past life, would casually toss around crude remarks, commenting on muscles while watching shows.

But in reality, she was quite clueless.

On the other side, Goudan and Ludan heard that they could sleep with the fragrant little aunt.

Although it was just sharing a small 1.2-meter bed, they were overjoyed, chattering away, unwilling to sleep.

Zhi Zhi, on the other hand, had always slept with her mother and was still crying, making little whimpering sounds.

Song Qingshan, the real man, was waiting as well.

Su Xiangwan boiled herself a pot of water and had Song Qingshan take it to the bathroom.

Although the water was limited, and there was no bathtub or anything, so she couldn’t take a proper soak, it was still better than when she was at the labor camp, where she had to get the children to sleep before she could take a bath, or even kick them all out.

Especially since a few young intellectuals had come recently and kept wandering around the yard. The gap in the labor camp door was wide enough for someone to squeeze through. Had she really not bathed in several days?

“Don’t you want me to rub your back?” asked Song Qingshan.

Recently, because his wife had been so kind to him, he was feeling a bit elated, like the Yellow River water—slightly turbulent, with waves crashing.

Su Xiangwan gave him a glance and immediately shut the door.

Song Qingshan lay down on the bed, his mood soaring. He hummed a tune about the sunset and the soldiers returning to camp.

Suddenly, he heard a knock on the door.

Recently, his mother-in-law had been feeling unwell, and Song Qingshan was always worried that she might suddenly pass away. He was quite anxious.

Although he had been excited earlier, the thought of his mother-in-law’s condition had a sobering effect, and all his enthusiasm faded away.

It turned out that it was his father, Old Man Song, standing outside.

“Xiangwan, is Qingshan asleep?” the old man asked.

Su Xiangwan quickly asked, “Dad, has Mother’s condition worsened? Should I bring some money?”

Old Man Song sighed and said, “It’s like this—you know, Dahua is having trouble with Fang Gaodi over their divorce. I’m afraid she won’t be able to handle it alone. I want to go to the city to see her and, by the way, bring your mother along for a check-up.”

It turns out, Song Dajie came to borrow money.

Song Qingshan quickly sat up, startled.

He knew the suffering his wife and children had endured in the two years after his death. He had seen it all.

But his mother was sick, and she needed money from time to time, but he couldn’t give it to her, and that weighed heavily on him.

Moreover, Song Qingshan was a bit worried—if his father asked for money and couldn’t get it, it would be uncomfortable for both of them.

After all, his father had raised them through hard work, always toiling day and night.

When his mother remarried and brought two older children, Song Qingshan, still a young man, silently helped raise them.

Now that his sons were grown and had children of their own, life still hadn’t gotten any easier for him.

He didn’t seem like a person but more like an old beast of burden, silently working without complaint—working hard, eating little.

When the children came, he raised them, and when they grew up and left, he didn’t seem to feel much sadness.

Of course, now there was still Jinguī and Song Fú, who, like him, had no father to rely on. He still had to support them.

His thoughts about life were simple: would the children go hungry or cold? Would they grow up? Would they be able to support themselves?

He was like an old workhorse, silently enduring it all.

After sitting for a while, Song Qingshan heard Su Xiangwan say, “Dad, just tell me how much you need.” It seemed she was willing to give a little.

Song Qingshan lay back down.

Old Song replied, “I can’t say exactly, just give enough for the medicine.”

Su Xiangwan originally had over four thousand yuan in savings.

However, building a house had cost two hundred for the foundation, and buying medicinal herb seeds had cost quite a bit more.

Plus, she had three thousand in a fixed deposit that couldn’t be withdrawn, and the loose change at home added up to a little over one hundred yuan.

When she entered the room, she saw the bare walls and the only small bed in the room, where Song Qingshan was lying on his side, sleeping soundly.

She rummaged through a small pouch on the floor and managed to find some money.

After thinking for a while, she counted out one hundred yuan and gave it to Song Dajie when she went out: “Dad, I can give you the money, but it can only go to the hospital. You can’t give it to my mother or to Qingyu or Fang Baoyu. I’ll be blunt—if you give it to them, I won’t recognize you anymore. Seriously, the money should be spent wisely. If it’s for something important, I can give it, but my money won’t go to waste.”

Old Song had never had much authority in front of his children.

Of course, this was partly because he never stepped up when it was most needed.

He tightly gripped the hundred yuan, patted his daughter-in-law’s hand, and after a long pause, he placed something in her hand. “This, keep it for Zizhi.”

Su Xiangwan opened her hand to see a small, dull-looking ball. It seemed to be jade.

She didn’t say anything and tucked the ball away. “Dad, you take care. Should we have Qingshan take you tomorrow?”

Song Dajie waved his hand. “No need. Zhao Yuanshan is here. He’s driving the county hospital’s car. Let him take us.”

Zhao Yuanshan was Song Erhua’s husband and a doctor at the county hospital.

With him coming, Su Xiangwan didn’t have to worry, and Song Qingshan, lying in the room, was also relieved.

Originally, Su Xiangwan hadn’t wanted her mother-in-law to go to the city, fearing she might cause trouble for Song Tingxiu’s job.

But ever since her mother-in-law’s health had deteriorated, her speech had become slurred.

Now, when she spoke like that, even if it was about complaints, Su Xiangwan doubted anyone would want to listen.

If she wanted to go to the city, let her go. If she stayed in the countryside and became half-paralyzed, someone would have to take care of her.

Looking at the new courtyard one more time, everything was neat and square, even the yard was paved with bricks, unlike other homes with mud floors.

On rainy days, stepping in the yard would make your shoes muddy.

The main room hadn’t been finished yet, just two side rooms had been tidied up.

The windows were made of wood, and the door was a lightweight, two-layer board door that Song Qingshan had taken from the construction site.

It wasn’t sturdy, but within two days, they had managed to build a yard like this, which was already quite good.

After Su Xiangwan entered and closed the door, Song Qingshan asked, “How much did you give my dad?”

Su Xiangwan smiled through gritted teeth: “Three yuan.”

Song Qingshan’s face darkened, but he didn’t say anything. He patted the pillow and said, “Sleep.”

This was the first time the couple slept alone together.

The bed was quite narrow, and Su Xiangwan, used to sleeping on a big kang, wasn’t quite accustomed to it.

Song Qingshan’s face darkened severely, more solemn than if he had sung the “March of the Volunteers” a hundred times.

“Fine, thirty yuan. Do you think I’m that petty?” Su Xiangwan saw his face turn black and added.

Song Qingshan indeed looked relieved: “Did you really give me thirty?”

If it had been a hundred, he might have gotten arrogant.

Su Xiangwan confidently said, “Thirty.”

“Thank you, really!” Song Qingshan let out a long sigh. “Yesterday, I was stubborn with you, but from now on, I promise not to touch you.”

A woman’s lips are much softer than a man’s, and she suddenly kissed him. Song Qingshan’s eyes widened like a goldfish, his eyes nearly popping out.

“Don’t tell me you’ve never kissed a woman,” Su Xiangwan released her lips, noticing that his lips were trembling, and he was rather awkward.

Song Qingshan pressed his lips together, maintaining his composure: “I have, how could I not?”

After thinking for a moment, it seemed he hadn’t actually kissed anyone, so he quickly added: “But you didn’t let me kiss you, right?”

At the same time, he confirmed again: “You did it willingly, right?”

“Earlier, I was quite willing, but now, not so much.” Su Xiangwan reached for the lamp to blow it out, and Song Qingshan blew so hard that the lamp fell over.

Lying side by side, Song Qingshan seemed more agitated.

“Su Xiangwan, after not seeing each other for two years, let me be honest with you. After all, the leader always says that couples should be equal. Especially for us soldiers, who are often away from home, when we return, the first thing we should do is be open with our family about everything, particularly important things between men and women.”

Su Xiangwan said, “Go ahead.”

Song Qingshan continued: “The first five years, I told you my record was clean, no problems at all. I also told you about this when I was in Dongfeng City.”

“Any problems after that?” Su Xiangwan asked.

Inside, she felt a bit amused.

The men of this era were so simple—coming back home and having to report their work. Most other men probably wouldn’t do that.

But Song Qingshan was so rigid, almost cute, serious and upright, just like a steel gun and bayonet.

Song Qingshan hesitated for a long time before finally saying, “When I was in Beijing, the reason I was able to come back was because of two female comrades who played a decisive role. One was a colleague from my old unit who gave me a testimony, and the other worked in military law and pushed the case to be resolved quickly. I won’t talk about the first one, she was just a colleague. The one from military law, before I left for home, she hugged me. If I said it was just out of courtesy, I’d be lying, but I didn’t mean anything by it, you understand?”

“Was she named Hou Qingyue? The sister of Hou Qinghua?” Su Xiangwan asked.

“How do you know?” Song Qingshan sounded quite surprised.

Su Xiangwan smiled faintly: “Song Qingshan, I know plenty about you. Alright, go to sleep now.”

Hou Qingyue, the sister of Hou Qinghua, in the original story, was Song Qingshan’s close confidante who would later offer him a lot of help.

After he finished explaining, Song Qingshan hesitated for a long time.

…

“You really never kissed anyone?” Su Xiangwan was quite surprised. His awkwardness wasn’t pretended—it was genuine.

Song Qingshan looked like he had just been pulled out of water, that same scent lingering.

Su Xiangwan remembered the first time he ate the buns she made—it was the same smell.

Su Xiangwan felt like she might collapse.

What kind of man was this?

They had three children, and he didn’t even know how to kiss. And he even called kissing “eating.”

She thought to herself, “Why didn’t you just eat me instead?”

But, all that “big big big,” “pleasant pleasant pleasant” was a lie.

The reality was “big big big,” “pain pain pain,” this was Su Xiangwan’s painful realization.

Zhi Zhi had been crying since five in the morning, and Su Xiangwan was rocking her on the floor, spinning around, but nothing worked.

Lu Dan and Gou Dan were originally sleeping soundly. As soon as they heard their sister crying, they both got up.

One grabbed the bottle, another searched for the milk powder, one made the stove fire, and one ran to fetch water from the labor camp. In no more than half an hour, the milk was ready.

Then, Lu Dan fell back into bed with a thud and went back to sleep.

Gou Dan hugged Zhi Zhi, leaning against Lu Dan, and fell asleep too.

Zhi Zhi, nestled between her two brothers, like a little hamster, sucking and chewing, eventually closed her eyes.

Su Xiangwan looked at her two nephews and realized she was completely useless in this situation.

It was at this moment that she suddenly realized how outstanding Gou Dan was.

He was holding his sister, dozing off, occasionally checking the bottle with an innocent look, but also like an old father, so endearing.

Song Qingshan woke up early and was planning to talk about his thoughts, but then he saw Su Xiangwan holding her stomach, looking very pale.

“Are you okay?” He grabbed her.

Su Xiangwan frowned and shook her head. “I’m fine, but aren’t you going to work?”

Song Qingshan got out of bed.

Since the house was still empty of furniture, everything was piled on a folding table.

He pulled out his military uniform and put it on, seeing Su Xiangwan, seemingly fine, laying oil paper on the floor, probably to paste the walls.

He asked softly, “Really, are you okay?”

“If there’s a problem, it’s… forget it, just go already.” Su Xiangwan said.