Chapter 30:

At 1:30 a.m., Chu Zheng left the company. Usually, he drove himself home, but today he was too tired and let the driver take over.

He lived in the same neighborhood as Mu Jinpei for convenience—to work overtime and to pick up and drop off his boss.

Exhausted, he leaned back in his seat and dozed off.

The car gradually slowed down. The driver softly reminded him, “Assistant Chu.”

Chu Zheng opened his eyes, thinking he might have imagined it. “Were you calling me?”

The driver gestured to look at the right side of the road. Chu Zheng turned his head sharply and saw a familiar license plate—the boss’s car. Then he saw the boss’s figure.

Mu Jinpei was walking on the sidewalk, holding Ji Xingyao in his arms. Ji Xingyao was looking up at him, while Mu Jinpei stared straight ahead at the road.

In the dead of night, these two looked so elegant—Mu Jinpei carrying her home like a prince carrying his princess.

Suddenly, Chu Zheng recalled how, when they left the hospital, the boss asked him whether Ji Xingyao had complained about him. At the time, Chu Zheng didn’t think much of it, but now he realized the boss might have unintentionally upset Ji Xingyao. This “princess carry” was probably an apology and compensation.

Previously, Xu Rui said no one could make the boss forget his grudges, and Chu Zheng had agreed.

Now he felt he had been too decisive. At least for this moment, Ji Xingyao made him temporarily forget his grudge—though the forgetting hadn’t lasted long.

Chu Zheng told the driver to drive on. Getting out here would spoil the mood; no one wanted to see him. Even the boss would find him an eyesore.

The car accelerated and disappeared into the night.

Mu Jinpei’s place was three kilometers from Ji Xingyao’s apartment. They had walked less than half the way, taking three breaks. Mu Jinpei’s arm ached, and Ji Xingyao’s legs and waist were tired.

Despite the discomfort, Ji Xingyao didn’t plan to walk the rest of the way home with him. Even if being in his arms was physically tiring, it brought her happiness.

She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Tomorrow your arms definitely won’t be able to lift.”

Mu Jinpei replied, “Not that bad.” He worked out every day, and carrying her wasn’t less intense than his usual training. If he hadn’t run seven or eight kilometers earlier that day, he wouldn’t have needed to stop after just a few hundred meters.

Ji Xingyao casually said, “Your daughter’s lucky then, to be carried by her dad from little to big.” She didn’t say our daughter—it would sound conceited.

But his daughter would definitely have to be born by her.

What a cute and interesting little girl that would be.

She couldn’t help but imagine.

Because of that remark, Mu Jinpei suddenly felt like a thousand pounds weighed on his feet. Luckily it was dark, so Ji Xingyao couldn’t see the emotions surging in his eyes.

Ji Xingyao looked up. “Why aren’t you saying anything? What are you thinking about?”

Mu Jinpei composed himself and avoided her gaze, staring at the road ahead. “You’re still young,” he reminded her. “Twenty-one.”

“My mom had me when she was twenty-three.”

Mu Jinpei was speechless.

At the intersection, turning the corner.

The wind was strong that way, and Ji Xingyao’s hands were cold. She instinctively slipped her hand into the collar of his shirt. “Are you afraid of marriage?” she asked directly.

Mu Jinpei didn’t know how to answer. Before getting revenge, he hadn’t thought about anything. He didn’t want to marry, and wasn’t sure if this counted as fear of marriage.

Ji Xingyao naturally took his silence as agreement. The topic hung awkwardly in the air, making her seem like she was pushing to marry him, even though she really wanted to be with him.

Publicly acknowledging their relationship didn’t mean much. Meeting the parents didn’t mean anything either.

She smiled. “I was just saying that casually before. Don’t take it seriously.” Then after a pause, “Marriage is definitely between me and my husband, and having kids is with my husband too.”

She withdrew her hand from his collar, traced his jawline slowly with her fingertips, speaking slowly, “You’re just my boyfriend.”

Mu Jinpei stopped walking and looked down at her. The words she’d said—“boyfriend” and “husband”—brutally reminded him of a fact:

One day, they would part ways. She would surely hate him, but the hatred would eventually fade. Just like Mu Jinpei’s mother Pei Yu felt toward Xie Junyi—love and hate would both vanish, leaving only disgust.

She would probably be the same.

Five, six, or maybe ten, eight years later, when she was only thirty, she would meet someone she liked, marry, and have children.

Her life would have nothing to do with him anymore.

Thinking of this was like a thin blade slicing through his insides.

Ji Xingyao ignored his gaze. Of course she was unhappy. She rested her cheek on his chest, squinting, and patted his shoulder. “Boyfriend, are we going or not?”

She deliberately emphasized “boyfriend.”

Mu Jinpei was used to her nitpicking. He kept staring at her, but she kept her eyes tightly closed.

“Yaoyao.”

“Asleep.”

“…”

Fearing she’d catch a chill standing in the wind too long, Mu Jinpei started walking forward. The road ahead was silent, each lost in their thoughts.

Cold night, lonely streets—their mood was the same.

“I never said I’m afraid of marriage,” Mu Jinpei finally broke the silence.

Ji Xingyao wasn’t that easy to please. “Tell your future wife, I’m your girlfriend.”

Mu Jinpei pulled her tighter into his arms. After a long moment, he whispered, “Whatever you like, I’ll give you everything I can.”

Even he found his words unbelievable—they meant he was conceding step by step, even on marriage, and it slipped out without thinking.

Ji Xingyao didn’t open her eyes. “Don’t care. You have money, I have money. You’re handsome, I’m handsome. You have what I have, I have what you don’t. Who knows who’s giving to whom.”

Mu Jinpei said, “Then you can give it to me. Whatever you give, I want.”

Ji Xingyao shot back, “Fine. On the day I get married, I’ll personally write you an invitation and deliver it, inviting you to the ceremony. Remember to give me a big red envelope as your ex-girlfriend.”

Mu Jinpei’s voice turned cold. “Xingyao.”

“Xingxing is so far away, I don’t know how many billion light years, she can’t hear you at that volume.”

“…” Mu Jinpei was speechless again.

Ji Xingyao’s waist and legs ached, so he changed how he carried her. Mu Jinpei put her down, thinking she might open her eyes, but she kept them half-closed.

“The streetlights aren’t bright; you don’t need to squint so much.” Mu Jinpei rubbed her eyes’ corner.

Ji Xingyao: “My eyes are too bright. I’m afraid the streetlights will feel inferior.”

Mu Jinpei: “…” He couldn’t catch his breath for a while.

The wind was strong here, so he buttoned her coat, worried she was cold. When they left, she put his coat on over hers.

After a two-minute rest, Mu Jinpei shifted her so her head rested in the hollow of his right shoulder.

Ji Xingyao crossed her legs, relaxed.

Suddenly, she said, “Mu Jinpei, it’s just me being generous—I don’t want to argue with you.”

Mu Jinpei knew what she meant—the “fear of marriage” topic again. He explained, “Before today, I never thought about marriage. That’s my problem.”

After a quiet moment, Ji Xingyao spoke again, this time not blaming him.

“Before meeting you, I never thought about dating. To me, being with others was a waste of time. My family, even my parents, thought I was abnormal, worried I had some mental issue. The happiness I found in my own world, through painting, no one could understand. Painting is my life, my passion, so I never felt lonely.”

She opened her eyes; Mu Jinpei looked at her, their eyes met.

“For you, I was a sudden infatuation,” she honestly said. “I never thought about marriage, so I generously forgave you for not thinking about it. But that doesn’t rule out one day I might impulsively get married.”

She traced his jawline again, slowly from top to bottom. “Boyfriend, you’re very lucky to have a good chance to marry me. Don’t be discouraged. Keep trying.”

Mu Jinpei lowered his head and kissed her eyes, then her lips.

Ji Xingyao felt a sudden ease in her heart and didn’t continue that topic. Instead, she asked him, “Today when the apartment building caught fire, you still took the elevator up. What were you thinking at that moment?”

Mu Jinpei: “I don’t know. There was no time to think. I was just afraid you’d get poisoned.”

Ji Xingyao tightened her grip around his neck and snuggled into his arms.

Just a moment ago they were at odds, and now this warmth—it felt unbelievable even to her. Maybe this was the mysterious thing about love.

They got home after 2 a.m. Ji Xingyao asked, “Are you going back now, or will you wait until I fall asleep?”

He had upset her twice today and wanted her to sleep well. “I’ll watch you sleep.”

Ji Xingyao grabbed her pajamas and took a quick shower. Coming out of the bathroom, she yawned several times.

After a tiring day, both body and mind were exhausted. Once she lay down on the bed, she couldn’t keep her eyes open.

Mu Jinpei dimmed the lights and sat on the edge of the bed, holding her hand.

In less than five minutes, Ji Xingyao fell into a deep sleep.

Mu Jinpei turned off the lights and left. He stood in the living room for a while, then called the driver to bring up his luggage—it was too late to keep going back and forth.

After showering, he dozed off on the sofa.

That night was dreamless.

The next morning, Ji Xingyao was awakened by the phone ringing—it was Uncle Zhang.

“Yaoyao, is Mu Jinpei beside you?”

Ji Xingyao: “…” She sat up to clear her head. “Uncle Zhang, I haven’t gotten up yet.”

“Mm, I’m asking if Mu Jinpei is beside you.”

Ji Xingyao rubbed her ear, sensing something off about the question—if she hadn’t gotten up, how could Mu Jinpei be beside her?

“Uncle Zhang, did you just wake up?”

Zhang: “I woke up earlier.” He cleared his throat twice. “Yaoyao, you don’t have to hide it from me. I’m responsible for your safety. How could I not know who stayed overnight in your apartment?”

Ji Xingyao was completely stunned—she had no reason to lie.

But Uncle Zhang wasn’t calling to question why Mu Jinpei stayed over. He was calling to tell her, “The paperwork for the sports car is done. It’s in the underground garage. When do you plan to give it to Mu Jinpei?”

Ji Xingyao thought for a moment, “I’ll give it to him when he comes to pick me up today.”

Zhang said nothing more—kids grow up fast. “When you come out later, I’ll give you the car keys.”

Ji Xingyao thought Uncle Zhang was acting strange today. He had fingerprint access to her apartment and usually just came in after telling her. What was going on?

“Just leave them right at the entryway.”

Zhang was still worried. “What if Mu Jinpei comes out and sees them?”

Ji Xingyao: “…Uncle Zhang,” she smiled helplessly, “Mu Jinpei really isn’t here. But he did bring me home last night. After that, he went back to his own place…”

Though, she wasn’t so sure about that.

She fell asleep afterward and honestly didn’t know if he stayed or left.

“Wait, Uncle Zhang.” She hung up, threw off the covers, got out of bed, and ran out of the bedroom. After a few steps, she turned back and noticed a sketch paper taped to the bedroom door:

“I didn’t go back last night. Mu Jinpei stayed.”

Ji Xingyao tore off the note and headed to the living room. Mu Jinpei was making coffee in the kitchen, dressed neatly with his hair half-dried. He must have just showered not long ago.

Hearing the sound, Mu Jinpei turned around. “Awake?”

Waking up and seeing him every day felt pretty good. Ji Xingyao opened her arms, and he hugged her.

“Go wash up. After breakfast, I’ll finish the painting I owe you.”

“The one called ‘Walking into Your World’?”

“Yeah.”

“Aren’t you busy today?”

“Not really. Chu Zheng’s handling things. I’ll work overtime tonight.”

Mu Jinpei set her down. “Go change into a white dress. I want to paint your back too.”

Ji Xingyao wrapped her arms around his neck, looking serious and focused. “If I’m your model for the day, what’s in it for me?”

Mu Jinpei was speechless. The painting was meant to be a gift to her, and now she was asking for perks. “You name it.”

Ji Xingyao remembered what he said last night: “Whatever you like, I’ll give you everything I can. Did I remember that right?”

Mu Jinpei nodded, curious what new idea she had.

Ji Xingyao looked him in the eye: “After the Spring Festival, take me to a place where I can feel your loneliness. I’ll be with you to feel it, and then help you walk out of it.”