Who Says Old Two-Dimensional People Can’t get Married!
Who Says Old Two-Dimensional People Can’t get Married! Chapter 60.3

Chapter 60: Exclusive to Jinjiang 3/3

On a hot summer night, he saw Octopus Teacher’s set of pictures on the homepage. His heart raced, and he grabbed something and laid on the bed, engrossed until midnight.

It was during that time that Song Fuzhi tried the “Dark Dragon” that Luolu Luli had given him, feeling that a fierce and muscular man like him should have such dimensions.

However, halfway through the attempt, Song Fuzhi gave up. It was just too uncomfortable and not enjoyable at all. Summing it up, it felt almost like being tortured.

It was strange because Professor Shi himself had a dragon with claws and teeth comparable to the Octopus Teacher’s, but the experience was entirely different. Professor Shi didn’t know what kind of magic he used, but while it was painful, it made Song Fuzhi tremble and almost cry.

This set was shot quickly, with simple settings and no special effects, returning to the most primitive and simple cosplay video.

Song Fuzhi sat in a chair, with one ankle casually resting on the knee of the other leg in a very manly posture.

Unlike Octopus Teacher, Song Fuzhi’s shirt modestly unbuttoned only one button, and a black tie covered almost half of his face, revealing only his light-colored lips, jawline, and prominent Adam’s apple.

He held a pistol in his hand, skillfully twirling it on his index finger, the short action making him exceptionally handsome.

The caption below the video was as concise as ever, just two characters: “Snipe me.”

FuFu had been updating very diligently lately, and the fans were excited beyond measure, quickly flooding the comments.

Ah, I love men in suits; you are amazing!

Why is he so handsome?!

Damn, I really love this kind of original, unedited, good-body cosplay that needs no special effects!

What does it mean to cover your eyes with a tie? Are you seducing me?

Although FuFu’s face is covered today, I’m even more excited about what’s happening!

I used to think FuFu was my husband, but now I want to shout, wife!

If I remember correctly, Octopus Teacher also cosplayed this character a long time ago. At that time, Octopus was quite domineering. Why does FuFu’s effect look so enticing?

The comment section was, as usual, full of excitement. This time, following Luolu Luli’s advice, Song Fuzhi picked a few comments to like.

When Song Fuzhi posted this video, he had just finished work and returned home. Professor Shi was preparing dinner in the kitchen, so Song Fuzhi sneakily checked the feedback outside.

Luolu Luli privately messaged Song Fuzhi: Look at your rankings; it’s like riding a rocket, directly into the top five!

Song Fuzhi made an “ah” sound. He hadn’t paid attention to that.

Checking it, indeed, his profile picture was hanging in the fifth position, with Warm Thousand Teacher still in the first place. The others were also skilled cosplayers.

Luolu Luli: Probably because you’ve been updating so diligently recently, your data is rising fast, so there’s a bonus.

Luolu Luli: Awesome! I didn’t expect your special forces-like cosplay training camp to hit the bullseye. You still have several cosplays scheduled after this. While preparing a gift for Professor Shi, casually grab first place, Old Fu!

Song Fuzhi: But for those prizes, besides the recommended screen and money, I don’t want anything else.

Luolu Luli: You’re so picky, even before receiving them.

Luolu Luli: Do you think the ones in front are really better? They all signed with companies and have been in the industry for several years. They have a fan base, and the company helps them. You, as an amateur, might find it challenging.

Song Fuzhi: That’s fine; I don’t care.

Luolu Luli changed the subject: But you’re doing great! I see you’ve surpassed several cosplayers from their company.

Luolu Luli continued: Great! They deserve to be overtaken by you!

Song Fuzhi:?

Luolu Luli: Personally, I don’t have a good impression of them. Although their cosplays are good, the industrial style is too heavy. Do you understand? They have a team, including the first-placed Wen Qian. They became popular because of their looks early on, and as the culture of second-dimension enthusiasts grew, they got more business resources. Esports, conventions, live broadcasts—many places like to collaborate with cosplayers. They think this is a good way to attract fans, so they signed with the company. But personally, they might not like the second dimension very much; they just want to make money.

Luolu Luli talked a lot, and although Song Fuzhi hadn’t encountered these things, he could understand them at a glance.

Luolu Luli: Cosplays with a team can be good, and many audiences buy into it. But personally, I don’t like it. I still prefer the casual playing style of HuYa’s Feifei.

Luolu Luli: Although he often disappears for half a year, they have a pure love for the second dimension, like the early years of the community, which is very simple.

Song Fuzhi found it a bit overwhelming. He didn’t care whether they had a company or not. He quickly told Luolu Luli he would talk about it later and hung up. Shi Zhang was calling him for dinner.

What could be more important than having dinner with your husband?

Nothing.

That night, Song Fuzhi and Professor Shi sat on the living room floor, eating and watching anime. They finished three episodes in an hour, which was a very comfortable time.

In the middle, Professor Shi asked Song Fuzhi what characters he liked, and Song Fuzhi smiled and answered that he liked the male lead because he was a bit silly, and he also liked the female lead because she was beautiful and cool. The supporting role was also good, playing the role of a comic relief—but most importantly, he loved the dog that the female lead raised; it was too damn cute.

Professor Shi took a deep breath. “So, your favorite character is the dog?”

Song Fuzhi nodded. “In this series, yes.”

Professor Shi silently picked up his chopsticks and ate. For some reason, Song Fuzhi felt like he was a bit introverted.

After a little lingering, it was time to go to sleep. There was the sound of water flowing in the bedroom, and Song Fuzhi went over to see Professor Shi filling the bathtub.

“Taking a bath tonight?” Song Fuzhi asked.

Professor Shi raised his eyelids with a gentle smile. “Yes, how about it?”

Song Fuzhi’s Adam’s apple moved: “Okay.”

Their married life had always been quite healthy, maintaining the rhythm of once a week, once a night. The specific day was not fixed, depending on the atmosphere and feelings.

Today was obviously all about that feeling.

Shi Zhang was filling the bathtub in the bathroom, and Song Fuzhi stood outside, locking eyes with him. The glances between them were entangled, filled with unspoken words.

Professor Song pretended to be calm and ran to the desk to write half of the lesson plan. After finishing, he looked at what he had written, but the sentences didn’t make sense.

“Professor Song is so dedicated.”

Shi Zhang, who knows when, stood beside him, gently taking the pen from Song Fuzhi’s hand and then holding his hand.

His fingertips scratched Song Fuzhi’s palm.

In an instant, Song Fuzhi felt his throat dry, and following Shi Zhang’s pulling force, he stood up obediently and kissed him with closed eyes.

As their breaths grew heavier, Song Fuzhi’s upper garment fell to the floor.

When there were only the sounds of heavy breathing left in their ears, the phone on the desk suddenly vibrated loudly.

Both of them paused, and after a few seconds, Song Fuzhi bit Shi Zhang’s lips and said vaguely, “Ignore it; it’s probably a sales call.”

Shi Zhang pressed his shoulder, creating some distance, and without responding to Song Fuzhi’s kiss, he calmly said, “Seems like it’s a call from your friend.”

He emphasized the words “your friend.”

Song Fuzhi, suppressing the agitation in his heart, saw “LuLi” on the screen and sighed.

There was a bit of internal struggle, but Song Fuzhi still answered the call.

“Hello, what’s up?” Professor Song went outside with his phone, his tone somewhat helpless.

Luolu Luli’s voice sounded a bit serious: “There’s something not quite right in the comments under your video.”

Song Fuzhi didn’t immediately understand what she was talking about.

Luolu Luli sent a few pictures: “Take a look.”

Song Fuzhi opened them, and under the latest video, several highly liked comments were saying similar things.

This big brother, are you trying to ride on Octopus Teacher’s popularity? All three recent cosplays are from Octopus Teacher’s previous works. Do you think we are blind?

Watching the Octopus Teacher retire, do you think you can be the second Octopus? Look at your finished products; they are all technology without a soul. You’re far from Octopus God.

Cosplays without showing your face don’t count as cosplays. Are you afraid that you don’t look good and will get criticized? Hahaha.

I can’t believe this quality is in the top five of the rankings. @Platform Official, I suggest removing him. Thank you.

Each comment had a considerable number of replies, and the number was still growing.

Some people agreed with the comments, while others were arguing against them.

I feel like there’s something familiar! God, this new cosplayer’s eating habits are too ugly. Don’t try to steal the limelight from the big shots.

– Really? Who said that after Octopus cosplayed a character, no one else could? Fu Teacher interprets them very well!

Although the cosplay is good, not showing your face is obviously stealing. It’s probably just a cloud in the second dimension. Unfollowed, bye.

Seriously, are you guys okay? Maybe FuFu just likes Octopus Teacher’s male fan, saw Octopus retire, and decided to come out to feed us. What’s wrong with cosplaying Octopus’s previous works? I love it anyway!

I just want to quietly watch a handsome guy. Why are you arguing?

Fu Teacher, don’t be swayed by their rhythm. Finally, we see such a Bodhisattva-like physique. Keep cosplaying, please!

The chaos was too much, and Song Fuzhi lost patience before finishing reading.

He stretched his neck to look inside the room. Shi Zhang was sitting on the single sofa with his back to him, looking somewhat lonely.

Luolu Luli was still sending messages: It’s probably orchestrated; these comments are too concentrated. Some people don’t like you, a newcomer, sharing their cake and want to bring you down.

Song Fuzhi was anxious, but not because of this incident.

Song Fuzhi: Okay, I’ll look into it later.

Luolu Luli: These idiots don’t even know who you are, just saying you’re riding Octopus’s popularity.

Luolu Luli: When they find out, they probably want to beat themselves to death. Hahaha.

Luolu Luli: How do you plan to respond? Although they are idiots, they won’t tolerate this.

Luolu Luli: You can’t directly say you’re preparing a gift, right? Tsk.

Song Fuzhi: It’s fine; I know.

This reply was visibly perfunctory.

Luolu Luli:… Do you have something urgent right now?

Song Fuzhi glanced at Shi Zhang sitting in the living room, took a deep breath, and replied to Luolu Luli’s last message: Yes, I’m urgently trying to ride Octopus Teacher’s popularity.

Song Fuzhi decisively closed his phone and threw all the messy thoughts aside.

He tossed the phone onto the sofa, making it bounce.

Shi Zhang raised his eyes from the sofa, his tone indifferent. “Finished talking with your friend?”

Song Fuzhi made a sound of agreement, squatted next to Shi Zhang, blinked at him, and spoke with an unusually soft tone, “Let’s shower together, Professor.”

That night, for some reason, Shi Zhang was a bit fierce, biting a small piece of skin under Song Fuzhi’s collarbone repeatedly.

Song Fuzhi couldn’t bear it and tried to push him away, but instead, Shi Zhang tightened his grip and pulled him into his arms.

Octopus Teacher was mischievous, teasing, and tormenting, and it was just not satisfying.

In the tremors, Song Fuzhi silently cursed himself.

Damn, who is riding on whom? 

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