21. I was afraid you would change your mind..

The second kiss that belonged to the 18-year-old Yu Xinqiao was different from the first. While the physical pain was somewhat alleviated, the psychological impact was even more intense.

Six years ago, neither of them was prepared, and their lips collided, leaving a taste of rust in their mouths. Suddenly, Yu Xinqiao discovered another advantage of Xu Yanhuan—he was very service-oriented. In the past, he would endure customers flirting with him while selling alcohol, and he would personally visit for double the hourly wage. And now, he would kiss him to avoid further questions.

Yu Xinqiao felt extremely embarrassed. Whether it was six years ago or now, whether it was his emotions or thoughts, he was always the one being led.

Struggling to push the person embracing him away, Yu Xinqiao took a deep breath and said, “At the very least, you should tell me why.”

Why didn’t he reply? Why didn’t he want a divorce?

Yu Xinqiao added a precondition, saying, “Don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with me. I won’t believe it.”

Xu Yanhuan first froze at the childish and naive question that only a 18-year-old like Yu Xinqiao could ask.

Then he raised his hand and gently wiped away the traces of tears at the corner of Yu Xinqiao’s eyes, choosing to abide by the rules he had set.

“Because I don’t want to leave it at that with you,” Xu Yanhuan said. “It’s my fault, so stop crying.”

But Yu Xinqiao was thinking, what fault do you have?

The one clearly at fault is me, who made the mistake of choosing to stay in Xuncheng six years ago and then made the mistake of clinging to you six years later.

As his emotions calmed slightly, Yu Xinqiao was about to say something else when his phone in his pocket suddenly rang.

It was a call from Liang Yi, asking if he had arrived home.

“He’s not with you, is he?” Liang Yi whispered, lowering his voice. “I saw how terrible he looked just now, and I was afraid of getting beaten up, so I didn’t dare to stay with you.”

Yu Xinqiao glanced in the direction of the kitchen, where Xu Yanhuan had consciously walked away when he answered the phone.

“So, you let me go like that, without worrying that I might get beaten up?”

“Did he hit you?” Liang Yi turned pale in fright.

“No,” Yu Xinqiao recalled the recent case Xu Yanhuan had taken related to domestic violence and said, “He wouldn’t do something like that.”

There was a brief silence on the other end of the phone, and when Liang Yi spoke again, his tone was completely different from his youth, filled with depth and maturity. “It seems like you trust him a lot. It’s my fault. Maybe I’ve been overthinking, and perhaps your relationship will progress rapidly after marriage, without any trust crisis at all.”

Yu Xinqiao shook his head. “It’s not your fault.”

Eighteen-year-old Yu Xinqiao can believe that tomorrow is doomsday, can believe that Xu Yanhuan is not after money, and can even believe that they kiss every day, but he cannot believe that Xu Yanhuan would like him.

However, he still wants to stay here because Xu Yanhuan said, “I don’t want to give up on you.” Just like back then, with a kiss that couldn’t be considered a real kiss, it overturned all his plans, and he willingly stayed in Xuncheng.

At the end of the phone call, Liang Yi urged them to have a good talk. Yu Xinqiao sighed, having lost the almost hysterical courage he had moments ago.

Fortunately, Xu Yanhuan didn’t bring it up again. He came out of the kitchen holding a plate with sliced apples.

Yu Xinqiao wasn’t good at rejecting someone’s kindness. He picked up an apple slice with a toothpick and ate it. By the time he reached the second slice, he remembered to say thank you.

“Thank you.” He noticed that Xu Yanhuan wasn’t eating, just watching him eat. Feeling a bit embarrassed, he picked up another slice and offered it to Xu Yanhuan. “You should eat too.”

Instead of taking it, Xu Yanhuan leaned closer and directly bit into the apple slice.

Even if he imagined himself in a scenario where “we’re already married,” and even if they had just kissed, this kind of intimate gesture between lovers made Yu Xinqiao’s heart flutter for a moment.

But it didn’t stop there.

After finishing the apple, Xu Yanhuan showered and brushed his teeth, then opened the door to the master bedroom.

Yu Xinqiao was calmly looking through sheet music when he saw the handsome guy coming out of the shower and couldn’t keep his composure. He glanced around nervously and asked, “Do you need something?”

The neighbor’s cat had already been taken away, so there was no need to sleep on the floor anymore. Could it be that Xu Yanhuan couldn’t bear it anymore and wanted to kick him out of the master bedroom?

Xu Yanhuan didn’t answer. He walked to the edge of the bed, bent down, and the warm yellow light illuminated his handsome features, making his contours appear gentle.

He looked at the person sitting on the bed and said calmly, “I’ve given you enough time.”

He was referring to Yu Xinqiao’s previous statement of “wait until I adapt.” At that time, Xu Yanhuan had approached the bed in the same way, getting closer to him, as if asking for a kiss.

Xu Yanhuan said they would kiss every day.

“But,” Yu Xinqiao said in a daze, “but you said that it’s fine like this.”

“I lied to you,” Xu Yanhuan said, “it’s not fine at all.”

“But you just said you didn’t lie to me.”

“That doesn’t count.”

Yu Xinqiao tried another approach, “But just now, we… we kissed.”

“That doesn’t count either,” Xu Yanhuan said, “You shouldn’t doubt me, so that was my compensation.”

…

They were already bringing up past issues so quickly.

Yu Xinqiao felt a sense of imminent collapse, as if the time for retribution had not yet come. It seemed that the recent argument gave Xu Yanhuan a reason to no longer restrain himself.

Paying for his own mistakes, Yu Xinqiao futilely said, “Can I not allow it…”

Seeing him return to his previous state, Xu Yanhuan relaxed his facial expression, and a slight smile appeared on his lips.

This was the most relaxed and enjoyable moment he had experienced in these past few days.

“Then let it be a debt for now.” He simply ruffled Yu Xinqiao’s hair and said, “We’ll slowly settle it in the future.”

Yu Xinqiao didn’t know how long Xu Yanhuan meant by “in the future.” He felt that the version of himself with amnesia not only became stupid and childish but also became extremely passive, only able to passively listen to what others said, passively follow their arrangements, and passively wait for memories that may or may not return.

Moreover, Xu Yanhuan was so dominant, completely displaying an attitude that left you with no choice but to believe him.

On the following day, a weekend, Yu Xinqiao took on the duty of the master and cleaned the hedgehog’s nest for Yan Yan. Hedgehogs were nocturnal animals, staying curled up in their nests during the day and refusing to move. Yu Xinqiao wore gloves and pulled it out of the nest, while the hedgehog grumpily snorted at him. Yu Xinqiao treated it as if it were a human Yan Yan and playfully poked its soft and tender belly with his hand.

While poking, he “scolded,” “You dared to be fierce with me, scare me, and always suddenly kiss me.”

Just as he was engrossed in poking, Xu Yanhuan answered a phone call and came out of the study. Yu Xinqiao immediately retreated, wearing a serious expression as he brushed the running wheel with a brush and took the opportunity to put Yan Yan the hedgehog back in its place.

The phone call was short, and after hanging up, Xu Yanhuan put on his coat and took another coat from the hanger by the door, handing it to Yu Xinqiao. “Are you free today? Let’s go to the police station together.”

Yu Xinqiao took the clothes and thought, “You’ve already made all the arrangements, so why bother asking?”

But he also wanted to know about the car accident a few days ago, and whether such incidents were common, whether Xu Yanhuan was constantly in danger.

Unexpectedly, they didn’t even see the local criminal suspect. The police there said that the suspect had already been arrested, and the relevant records and evidence had been submitted for court trial.

After learning this, Yu Xinqiao was bewildered and asked, “Why did we make this trip?”

Xu Yanhuan said, “To clear my suspicion. After all, hearing is deceiving.”

Yu Xinqiao: “…” How come he holds grudges even more than a Scorpio.

After leaving the police station, it was still early.

They got into a taxi, and Xu Yanhuan gave the driver an address. Yu Xinqiao asked, “Where else are we going?”

“I’m taking you to meet an old friend.”

On the way, Yu Xinqiao pondered in his mind, confirming that the two of them didn’t have any mutual friends. Or rather, he couldn’t recall Xu Yanhuan having any friends at all.

He always walked alone, a solitary figure on the road.

As a result, when they arrived at their destination and got off the car, Yu Xinqiao saw a familiar figure at the entrance of one of the shops on the roadside. He was momentarily stunned and then excitedly exclaimed, “Boss Huang!”

Boss Huang had just finished his brunch and was picking his teeth when he heard the voice. He looked up, grinned widely, and even dropped his toothpick on the ground, saying, “Good morning, Xiao Qiao!”

During the latter half of their time in Xuncheng, Yu Xinqiao often went to Boss Huang’s place.

More precisely, as long as Xu Yanhuan was working in the market, Yu Xinqiao would sit in Boss Huang’s shop, playing the piano while attentively observing outside through the window, to see if Xu Yanhuan would unintentionally attract numerous onlookers like a peacock displaying its feathers.

In the process, he managed to get a few free meals from Boss Huang, the standard three dishes and one soup.

“Unfortunately, you guys came at the wrong time. I just finished eating.” Boss Huang placed a bunch of bananas on the table. “Have some as a makeshift meal.”

Yu Xinqiao wasn’t hungry, so he peeled a banana and played with it while surveying the piano shop they were in. “Boss Huang, when did you bring your shop to the capital?”

Boss Huang stared at him for a while upon hearing that, then said, “Did you really lose your memory? I thought Xiao Xu was joking with me.”

Actually, in the second year after Yu Xinqiao left Xuncheng, Boss Huang sold his shop and came to the capital to rent a new storefront.

“When you’ve had enough of a place, you think about changing it. Coincidentally, Xiao Xu also passed the exam for the capital, and I can ask him to help me move the pianos.”

A very hasty reason. But for someone as easygoing and open-minded as Boss Huang, it seemed quite ordinary.

“Is that true? You’re not in debt and had to move, right?” Yu Xinqiao joked with him. “Is your real name Huang He, the one who ran away with his sister-in-law?”

Boss Huang burst into laughter. “You won’t believe it, but our names do sound similar. I’m Huang He, He as in the stalk of grain.”

That name inexplicably sparked Yu Xinqiao’s desire to play. He handed the peeled banana to Xu Yanhuan and casually picked a piano to uncover. He flexed his fingers, playing the tune of “The Yellow River Cantata.”

Boss Huang, who could also play the piano, pulled a chair and sat down beside Yu Xinqiao, playing along with him. Taking advantage of the sound of the piano, he said, “I feel like something’s not right between you two.”

Yu Xinqiao was surprised. How could he notice?

Boss Huang continued, “Before, whenever you two came here, it seemed like you both had something on your minds. Even during your wedding, you didn’t seem very happy. I suggested hiring a band to liven up the atmosphere, but you both declined.”

“A band? With wind instruments? Who would dare…” Yu Xinqiao trailed off.

“But I really didn’t expect you two to get married,” sighed Boss Huang. “When you left without a word back then, Xiao Xu was down for quite a while, and he lost a lot of weight.”

Yu Xinqiao found this absurd. “How could it be because of me?”

It was obvious that he drove me away.

Since it was brought up, Yu Xinqiao took the opportunity to ask, “What happened after I left back then?”

He wanted to know how Xu Yanhuan had spent those six years.

“There’s a lot to tell,” teased Boss Huang. “But it depends on whether you want to listen…”

Before he finished speaking, Xu Yanhuan, who was helping with organizing the merchandise, walked over and rested his hand on the piano.

Boss Huang dragged out the word “listen” and, under Xu Yanhuan’s watchful gaze, changed his tune. “It also depends on whether certain people will allow me to speak.”

Yu Xinqiao: “…”

If he didn’t want to say it, then forget it. Yu Xinqiao thought indignantly that he could guess it anyway. Xu Yanhuan, adorned with the halo of entering a prestigious university, must have had countless pursuers. Forget about dating, he probably didn’t even know how many times he had kissed someone.

No wonder his skills became so good.

After feeling sorry for the twenty-four-year-old Yu Xinqiao, he began to feel unworthy of the eighteen-year-old Yu Xinqiao. He recalled that pouring rainstorm night, the pounding of his heart at the time, and the piece “Moonlight Sonata” he played for Xu Yanhuan’s birthday.

At that time, they couldn’t buy a cake, so Yu Xinqiao asked Xu Yanhuan if he wanted to listen to him play the piano.

Both of them had just exchanged a kiss that didn’t quite feel like a kiss and said hurtful things to each other. They were both upset. Xu Yanhuan stood there without saying a word, and Yu Xinqiao, feeling reluctant to take the initiative again, sat down and started playing.

He was convinced that Xu Yanhuan hadn’t really listened to him play because Xu Yanhuan hadn’t moved a muscle in the restaurant. The melody was soft, it was raining outside, and he doubted Xu Yanhuan could hear it from that far away.

However…

When Yu Xinqiao played this piece again six years later, Huang He yawned and said the song was too hypnotic and asked him to play another one. Xu Yanhuan, who was next to them, said, “It’s good, let’s listen.”

“Don’t think I don’t know you’re tone-deaf,” Huang He attempted to expose him. “Back then, I had Jay Chou playing in my car, and you frowned, asking me why I kept playing the same song.”

Yu Xinqiao couldn’t help but curl his lips.

He also had mischievous thoughts. After finishing an eight-beat segment, Yu Xinqiao seamlessly switched to another piece, starting from the gentle part in the middle, slowing down the rhythm to be exactly the same.

Huang He could naturally tell and laughed, saying, “Xiao Qiao, you’re so unfair. You don’t play something familiar like ‘Für Elise’ or ‘Wedding in a Dream.'”

“I’ve heard that one too,” Xu Yanhuan said.

Yu Xinqiao was stunned, and his hands on the piano stopped.

“Is that true or not?” Huang He imitated Yu Xinqiao’s tone and asked with a smile. “Then tell me, what’s the name of this piece and where did you hear it?”

Facing Yu Xinqiao’s gaze, it felt as if they were locking eyes across six years of time.

“Starry Sky,” Xu Yanhuan said, “in the auditorium of Xuncheng No. 2 High School.”

After leaving Boss Huang’s shop, it was already past mealtime.

When asked what he wanted to eat, Yu Xinqiao thought for a moment and said, “The shrimp and pork dumplings from that place last time.”

Xu Yanhuan took him there.

The owner of the dumpling shop was quite surprised to see them on a busy weekend and said, “On a big weekend like this, you two didn’t go eat Western food and came to my place?”

Xu Yanhuan said, “We’ve been busy for half a month and have been craving your dumplings.”

The last time Yu Xinqiao came here, he was in a state of confusion, and now he was filled with memories from six years ago. Hearing the owner calling them “you two” repeatedly made him realize the part that had been neglected.

After the owner went back to the kitchen, Yu Xinqiao asked, “Before, before I lost my memory, did I come here?”

Xu Yanhuan skillfully placed two pairs of chopsticks into a cup of boiling water and said, “On the day we met again at the law firm, you had lunch here.”

“I came here with you?”

“Yeah.”

“Afterward, did we come here often together?”

There was a slight pause in Xu Yanhuan’s actions, and he said, “No. You were busy with work, so I usually packed the food to take away.”

Yu Xinqiao understood. No wonder the last time the owner asked if they wanted two orders of shrimp and pork dumplings to go.

“Then how does the owner know about… us?”

“That day, you proposed to me here.”

Yu Xinqiao was taken aback. He thought that a proposal should happen in a warm home, by a spring lake, or in a fragrant garden, in a romantic atmosphere and a carefully arranged setting.

“How could it happen in a dumpling shop, and on the first day we reunited?”

Xu Yanhuan didn’t give him time to figure it out and continued, “And I agreed right away.”

“…,” Yu Xinqiao, who had lost his memory, began to worry indiscriminately about Xu Yanhuan’s mental state. “I understand now. You must have thought I was joking back then.”

Xu Yanhuan didn’t deny it. “You did seem like you were joking, but I still agreed immediately.”

Before Yu Xinqiao could ask why, Xu Yanhuan answered, “I was afraid you would change your mind, like yesterday.”

Time went back four months to the day when Yu Xinqiao, wearing a fitted coat, sat across from Xu Yanhuan. The steaming heat enveloped his face, as if nothing had changed from six years ago.

Only his smile seemed a bit mischievous. “Just now at the law firm, Lawyer Xu didn’t get angry, did he?”

They were discussing their criteria for choosing a spouse, and Xu Yanhuan answered, “No.”

The 24-year-old Yu Xinqiao had become adept at hiding his emotions. He stirred the soup in his bowl with a spoon at a steady pace, his tone seemingly casual. “So, Lawyer Xu, are you married?”

“No.”

“What a coincidence, I’m not either. Should Xu Lü consider marrying me?”

Xu Yanhuan didn’t need to consider and said directly, “Okay.”

After all, the stars could choose to fall elsewhere.

But only you can illuminate my boundless night.

——————–

Author’s Note:

The first kiss isn’t finished yet. The next chapter will continue to revisit old accounts (but it’s already sweet).