Don’t Be Jealous, I Will Bend Myself
Don’t Be Jealous, I Will Bend Myself Chapter 56

Translated by Novice Translations 

Messed around by Snacks – alternate title, Copping a Feel (´・ω・`) 

Arc 4: Fireproof, Burglarproof, Friendzone Proof – 1 

Bend Yourself 

  Ke Li couldn’t find a suitable topic to talk about with Shi Jin. She sat quietly and was distracted from time to time, sneaking peeks at Shen Qing’s movements. 


  The dating couple were so engaged in their conversation that they didn’t notice her.  


  The waiter’s service was very efficient, and the coffee were quickly served along with the dessert.  


  The coffee tasted mellow and delicious. Ke Li’s mood was much better. Her brow slightly furrowed when she suddenly recalled the mission world. In any case, she won’t do another task again.  


  It’s true that you can experience life and even learn a lot about love while doing those tasks, but it was all virtual. Like flowers in the mirror, the moon’s reflection in the water, in the end it wasn’t real.  


  Now Ke Li wants to have a real relationship. She glanced at Shi Jin across from her and the person faintly smiled back at her. Her smile was so gentle and familiar as if she has seen it before.  


  Ke Li shook her head as if it was aftereffects from the mission.  


  Shi Jin was quiet for the entire time, but her presence wasn’t small. Ke Li always felt that Shi Jin’s eyes were always on her person. She felt a little uncomfortable and said: “I heard that you always lie down for a while. You’re not doing the tasks, are you?”  


  Shi Jin stirred the coffee and smiled at Ke Li, “It’s true. I see my girlfriend from time to time.”  


  Ke Li: “……” 


  Were there any other single dogs besides her in this world?  


  In fact, after she saw that Shen Qing’s date wasn’t Shi Jin, Ke Li knew that she misunderstood before. Shen Qing is the playful type, but she is loyal. She wouldn’t do things like stand on two boats.[mfn]Boats are love interests or lovers[/mfn]  


  It turned out she kept herself in the dark and secretly ate Shi Jin’s vinegar. Ke Li suddenly said, “So, you’re not my mother’s girlfriend.”  


  Ke Li quickly explained when she saw Shi Jin’s facial expression almost collapse on the spot: “I’m sorry ah. I thought my mother was chasing you and that you guys were together. I just…”  


  “……” Shi Jin didn’t think that all her efforts during this time were all misinterpreted by Ke Li.  


  ”It’s okay. It’s okay since the misunderstanding was resolved.” She emphasized in particular, “I’m still single.” 


  Ke Li was confused and asked, “Didn’t you say you see your girlfriend from time to time?”  


  That’s right, everything in the Life Experience Department was false.  


  Ke Li remembered hearing a case about a man who dearly missed his deceased girlfriend and visited the Life Experience Department regularly in order to cherish her. At last, he fell in love with his girlfriend in the virtual world and chose to go accompany this virtual person all day long. In various mission worlds, he fell in love with the same girl model. He finally died when his brain cells were overworked to the point of having a stroke.  


  Sometimes false is true and true is false. There were many people in the world who would rather live in a dream than want to return to reality.  


  Ke Li suddenly understood why Shi Jin went to lie down from time to time. Maybe her girlfriend had an accident. But she didn’t dare to guess randomly that it was an accident, instead she just looked at Shi Jin quietly.   


  Shi Jin’s eyes darkened, then brightened. She smiled and said: “She was lost by my carelessness. Now I’m trying to get her back.”  


  Is the girlfriend still alive? 


  Ke Li suddenly couldn’t understand. She was immersed in other people’s sadness who still had their own dogs while she was a single dog. She politely said: “Then I hope your wish is granted soon.”   


  Shi Jin said confidently: “Definitely will.” 


  Ke Li smiled and said nothing. 


  At a glance, she saw that Shi Jin was still drinking the coffee and didn’t want to get up. But it was awkward for two people to continue sitting like this. Ke Li absentmindedly ate her dessert. She felt as if she was on a date when tasting this dessert.  


  She ate and stared at Shen Qing. She wanted to see how middle-aged people dated. Shi Jin’s hand suddenly stretched out and gently stroke across her lips. This touch was like an electric shock that zapped to her scalp, leaving a numb and tingly sensation.  


  Ke Li’ fork stilled and hovered mid-air, she turned to stare at Shi Jin who was extremely confident in her movements. In the next moment, her face burned. She sat upright and said, “What…what.”  


  Shi Jin slowly took out a tissue, wiped her slender white fingers and explained: “Your lips were covered with cream just now. I noticed that you were distracted so I couldn’t help but wipe it for you.”  


  ”…” Ke Li didn’t speak. Do people normally like to do things in such a direct manner now? And even if you want to wipe it, you should use a tissue. What’s with using your hand?”  


  She appeared to be afraid that Ke Li thought she was being frivolous. Shi Jin further explained: “My girlfriend used to like the mousse cakes here. She also gets things stuck to the corners of her lips, so I’m used to wiping it off.”  


  Ke Li: “…” 


  So what? 


  She’s not Shi Jin’s girlfriend. 


  Ke Li continued to eat cake, but didn’t believe that while she ate, cream kept getting stuck on her face. She saw Shi Jin take out her cellphone and bowed her head to do something. She was about to say that since she’s busy, she will make a move and leave first, but then heard Shi Jin said: “Older sister Qing is here.”  


  Ke Li turned around and saw that Shen Qing was coming over to their table. She couldn’t hide the excitement on her face. It seemed that the date was successful. She looked like a little eunuch kissing up when she praised: “Mom you’re awesome.”  


  ”Naturally.” Shen Qing’s eyes looked over Ke Li and Shi Jin. She pointed out: “Little brat, are you on a date?”  


  ”…” It kind of is. Ke Li looked at Shi Jin and expected her to explain it, but she didn’t expect Shi Jin to smile and suddenly retort: “Older sister Qing we didn’t disturb your date.”[mfn]Indirectly implying they are on a date and that they weren’t rude to interrupt her date so why is she over here interrupting theirs[/mfn] 


  “I won’t disturb, but I still have to thank you.” Shen Qing said and stared at Ke Li again. “Otherwise a little brat would stare at me the entire time, like she was catching an adulteress. It almost cost me the date with how awkward it was. I‘d miss out on second base then.”  


  Ke Li: “…” 


  After Shen Qing finished scolding Ke Li, her face turned pleasant. She went on to explain that it was her girlfriend who she’s been wooing. Ke Li wasn’t here to catch an adulteress, rather her daughter finally got to witness an intimate joyous kiss.  


  Ke Li: “…” You middle-aged people are so direct.  


  Seeing that Ke Li had no interest in being here, Shi Jin said: “Let’s go back first. Older sister Qing said she had something to ask you before. When she finishes her date, she will tell you.”  


  “En? But I don’t want to do tasks anymore.” Ke Li decided to bite the bullet and tell them first, so she wouldn’t be suddenly dragged into the mission world and forced to continue doing tasks. 


  “I know. But it’s better if you go back and wait. Maybe it’s something really urgent.” Shi Jin said with consideration.  


  Ke Li secretly rolled her eyes and pursed her lips: “What’s more important than her date right now?”  


  Shi Jin: “…” 


  Although she said this, Ke Li still followed Shi Jin back to the Time Administration. A bunch of high-tech and high-precision instruments dazzled her. She suddenly recalled that when she came to find Shen Qing, she had never seen Shi Jin here. 


  She asked cheekily: “Older sister Shi Jin, what did you used to do before?”  


  Shi Jin always looked gentle and calm usually, but when she heard Ke Li’s words, her mood visibly fluctuated and seemed to be a little surprised.  


  She replied: “Big data development.” 


  Ke Li thought for a while and said in surprise: “You also major in computer science?”  


  “My undergraduate degree was purely mathematics. The data mining is from postgraduate study. Wouldn’t you be considered my junior classmate?” Shi Jin’s smile was very bright and it was very easy to close the distance between the two. She continued, “And you should have been a freshman while I was in my third year.”  


  ”…” Ke Li didn’t dare to ask anymore. Suddenly she felt like she discovered a new relation. Shi Jin clearly didn’t experience that same sense of surprise, but instead she seemed as though she was teasing her.  


  In fact, the chances of them studying in the same school were quite high. Even though she dropped out much later, she had also been a computer science major with great interest in learning. The school was one of the best institutions in the country. If Shi Jin happened to be in the same institution at the same time, this might be possible.  


  During Ke Li’s silence, Shi Jin went to bring a glass of water and said warmly: “Have a glass of hydrolyzed water for your thirst.”  


  Ke Li had just eaten dessert and was really thirsty. She thanked her and took the glass. After drinking it, she thought it was sweet and delicious, so she drank a little more. After awhile, she suddenly felt drowsy and wanted to go to sleep but wanted to stay awake.  


  “You just woke up not too long ago. It’s normal to be unwell. Go to sleep first. I’ll wake you up later.”  


  Shi Jin’s voice was very gentle. Ke Li didn’t think too much about it, with the sudden onset of sleepiness. Once settled in the bed, she shortly fell asleep.  


  Shi Jin leaned over and gently kissed Ke Li on the forehead. Her eyes were dark, then said to the staff around her: “Let her sleep for a while. Wait for elder sister Qing to come over before starting. Pay attention and carefully observe the data. This time, there should be progress.”  


  ”Yes, Miss Shi.” 




  Ke Li felt that her sleep was very comfortable, it was like sleeping on clouds. She was surrounded by softness and her nose was filled with a refreshing fragrance. It seemed that she was holding a fragrant soft body in her arms.   


  Ke Li: “…”  


  Did she drink too much and mess with someone?  


  Ke Li shuddered violently and tried to open her eyes but her eyes were filled with darkness. Obviously, it was still night and the person in her arms were real. However, this was obviously not her bed and the person in her arms wasn’t a person from real life.  


  [Host, welcome to the new world.] 


  ”…” Ke Li angrily said, “Didn’t I say that I didn’t want to do another task? Be careful, I might report you, ah.”  


  [This is what the Minister wants. When the host falls asleep, you will automatically enter the next world.]   


  ”…” Ke Li remembered the glass of water that Shi Jin gave her. Her face was incredulous and became ugly. Isn’t Shi Jin simply a swindler?  


  No, she’s a pig trotter!  


  [Host, there’s no way to leave the mission world right now. Recently, it’s said that the host wants to fall in love. Next, debrief of the world’s general plot to ensure that the host is satisfied to tears.]  


  Ke Li: “…” 


  The plot of this world is very simple. To summarize, it’s fireproof, burglarproof and friendzone proof.  


  The background is set in high school, when students are green and hazy love would sprout. The female lead Ji Linxi was pursued relentlessly by the male lead Shao Yixuan. Just as love was about to bloom, her best friend Ke Yu also fell in love with the male lead and fought for him. At last, the two people turned their backs to each other, and the former best friend became a love rival.  


  Ke Yu courted disaster and became the female lead’s best friend turned villainess.  


  Ke Li: “…” 


  There was no doubt that Ke Li became Ke Yu. Ke Yu, a female supporting character in a youthful school setting will definitely not be no worse than the female lead in terms of aesthetics. But her luck in romance and other aspects were far worse.  


  As long as the person she likes is interested in the female lead, then she can’t co-exist with the female lead. But before the male lead appeara, they were best friends. But after the male lead appears, all their differences are magnified, and the previous best friend will become mutual love rivals.  


  Sometimes women were very emotional, but also very unsympathetic. Ke Li wasn’t surprised by this and said, “What about the plot after the scum system?”  


  [Host, please wait a moment.] 


  Before the scum system, naturally it was a prince with a princess scenario, and all aspects of their relationship were perfect. Only the malicious villainess Ke Yu would end up living the most miserable life.  


  After the scum system occurred, the male lead became muddled. Who doesn’t he know?[mfn]Meaning he knows some hook-ups for drug deals.[/mfn] Finally, he sought stimulation from drugs and became addicted to taking drugs all day long. He was addicted to the intense pleasure from being high. The female lead was also forced to follow his habits. The two became drug addicts and were on the boundaries of death every day. Finally, they entered a drug rehabilitation center, but their lives were worse than the vicious supporting female lead Ke Yu.   


  When she finally saw that her vessel lived well, Ke Li sighed: “This is simply the path of a bad teenager who led the female lead astray.”  


  [Host, so you’re the best friend. You should act accordingly. Don’t be soft on the female lead. There are many things you can do with a best friend status.]  


  ”…” Ke Li sometimes admired her ability to adapt. This was probably because the person who gave her the water was Shi Jin. So almost all her initial anger dissipated and she had a calm face now.  


  Ke Li unconsciously moved her hands. Her fingertips felt two full and round mounds. Like a startled bird, she immediately stopped and asked, “What’s the situation now?”  


  [The current supporting female lead is still a good friend and hasn’t been exposed to the male lead. She’s curious and is secretly verifying whether she has feelings beyond friendship with the female lead.]  


  ”How can the supporting female lead be so savvy?” Ke Li automatically made up a lily drama: The supporting female lead really liked the female lead and didn’t like the male lead who smiles evilly. The reason why she acted this way was in order to recapture the female lead.  


  But this was just her own brain hole fantasy. As soon as the male lead appears, the supporting female lead will automatically become a brain-dead girl.  


  Ke Li was just surprised that she had such a plot in her original novel. This really surprised her.  


  [After all, the female lead here is a straight woman. She boasts that she is as straight as a steel pipe like the host before. This can be seen from the fact that the supporting female lead didn’t end up bending her, and instead she liked the male lead.]  


  Ke Li, who has already bent into a mosquito coil: “…”  


  This task seems to be a stage for her own bending.  

Author’s Notes:  

Sherlock Holmes straight female lead: Do you like m… 

Ke Li nodded like pounding garlic. 

Sherlock Holmes straight female lead: …my boyfriend? 

Ke Li: …… 

cp: direct care of the household would tease x bent mosquito coil Ke Li 

This is probably a girlfriend by name, to discuss moves, animation…all the way until intimacy. I thought of a straight as a steel pipe female lead with a girlfriend.  

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