Yu Nian glanced at the time in the car, 2:03 AM, just two hours into the new year.

The sudden harsh braking had startled Qi Wang, shaking his body in the passenger seat, showing no concern for the patient.

They stopped at the villa area, with Qi Wang’s temporary residence in Rong City just forty meters ahead, at Cuihua Mansion A-35. From afar, the spacious villa appeared gloomy and dark, only the shadows of trees visible.

Qi Wang didn’t often stay here, only the cleaning company would come regularly, so there was naturally no warmth or liveliness.

The air conditioning was on in the car. Yu Nian, who had felt fine moments ago, now felt hot enough to sweat.

He loosened his collar and turned to look at Qi Wang’s pale face, asking, “Do you really want to see me?”

“Yes,” Qi Wang said without hesitation.

He was never one to express his emotions outwardly, whether at twenty or now, but facing Yu Nian, he dared not be anything but honest.

He added softly, “I want to see you every day. Those few hours this afternoon, following you, were the happiest I’ve been in over a month. I saw you buy roadside milk tea, so I bought one too. When you counted down in the square, I stood behind you.”

His lips curled ever so lightly, tinged with loneliness.

“But I know it’s not respectable to do so, so I didn’t dare to come forward and greet you.”

Yu Nian’s fingers tapped on the steering wheel.

He thought, time really changes many things.

Eight years ago, he was the one following Qi Wang’s footsteps.

He confessed to Qi Wang on the Ferris wheel, Qi Wang rejected him, and he followed behind Qi Wang all the way, unable to resist the urge to cry.

He knew how it felt.

And now, the one quietly following from afar had become Qi Wang.

As he looked at Qi Wang, Qi Wang’s face hadn’t changed much from twenty, but the status and power he had gained over the years had stripped away his former innocence and vigilance, replaced by an aura of authority and restraint.

This made Yu Nian feel somewhat estranged.

But now, meeting Qi Wang’s gaze and hearing him say he had followed him all the way, Yu Nian suddenly felt like Qi Wang had reverted to the young man from eight years ago, silently watching him cry and yearning to touch him but holding back.

Yu Nian’s fingers tapped on the steering wheel.

This was New Year’s Eve.

Even though it was already past midnight, the noise from the crowd could still be heard in the distance.

When he stood in the crowd counting down in the square, everyone’s faces seemed to be filled with happiness and anticipation.

But he stood there, feeling out of place.

He didn’t even know what New Year’s wish to make.

He had already achieved success, happiness in his family, from youth to now, many people had expressed their affection for him, one after another.

From a worldly perspective, he seemed to lack nothing.

But as the clock gradually approached twelve, he found himself feeling lonely amidst the crowd.

And now, he was hiding with Qi Wang in this narrow car.

No fireworks, no champagne.

Yet, the void in his life seemed to have been quietly filled, even if it was mixed with fragments of glass.

Leaning back slightly, his eyes lazy, he asked Qi Wang nonchalantly, “When you made your wish to the gods, did you only want to meet me, or did you wish for something else?”

---

The lights came on at Cuihua Mansion A-35, but there was only one lamp in the living room, dimly dispelling the darkness at the entrance.

Yu Nian was held in Qi Wang’s arms, and the two didn’t even make it to the bedroom upstairs.

His shirt was wrinkled, hanging loosely on his shoulders, but luckily, the indoor heating had been turned on long ago, dispelling the winter chill.

He tilted his head back, Qi Wang’s hand clasped at the back of his head, their lips tightly locked.

On the coffee table lay a butterfly orchid nurtured in the greenhouse, delicate in pink. It was purchased and arranged by the villa’s housekeeper, adding a touch of freshness to the otherwise heavy-toned room, yet blending in harmoniously.

Yu Nian’s hand waved on the sofa, accidentally knocking over the pot of flowers.

The pot fell to the ground without breaking, but the flowers happened to nestle between his fingers.

Yu Nian’s fingers tightened, and the flowers easily fell off the branches, crushed, wrinkled, ground into a pink mist, and dropped to the floor.

Looking back on this night later, Yu Nian could only describe it as a haze of color and confusion.

They had been up from around two to past four. Yu Nian not only had no good meat left on his body, but Qi Wang’s barely healed wound also reopened.

In the end, it was Yu Nian who, still in his robe, rummaged through the medicine box and helped Qi Wang reapply the bandages.

Yu Nian wasn’t very good at these delicate tasks and was a bit clumsy.

But having just enjoyed Qi Wang’s full attention and care, he felt both physically and mentally pleased, rare to show some kindness to Qi Wang.

“Does it hurt?” he asked.

He sat on the bed while Qi Wang sat on a cushion, creating a height difference for easier movement.

Qi Wang shook his head.

“No, it doesn’t hurt.”

After dressing the wound, Yu Nian glanced at the time on his phone.

The two people who should have had nothing to do with each other had already rolled the sheets for the second time. Being cold and distant now seemed inappropriate.

Yu Nian didn’t want to argue about this.

He adjusted his robe and said to Qi Wang, “I’m hungry.”

---

The refrigerator in the villa was fully stocked.

Qi Wang also casually put on a pajama and stood in the kitchen, asking Yu Nian, “What do you want to eat? Do you want tomato shrimp noodles?”

He remembered that Yu Nian used to like this dish.

Yu Nian just grunted, lost in thought and absent-minded.

Qi Wang started cooking.

Yu Nian stood by with his arms crossed, watching him.

The kitchen in this villa was spacious, equipped with a full set of Gaggenau kitchen appliances, with bright black countertops. Qi Wang stood inside, tall and handsome, looking like he could grace the cover of a home living magazine.

But what Yu Nian remembered was Qi Wang making late-night snacks for him in that small, cramped, and poorly ventilated kitchen. Every time they were active at night, Qi Wang didn’t know how to comfort him properly, awkwardly and with a hint of guilt.

Many times, he would run out barefoot to eat supper, and Qi Wang, afraid he would catch a cold, would silently crouch down and help him put on socks.

He always found Qi Wang strange at that time.

Clearly, he seemed so cold and indifferent, but when it came to love, he was like this.

“Done.”

Qi Wang’s voice interrupted Yu Nian’s reminiscence.

He looked up and saw Qi Wang already holding out supper. The tomato shrimp noodles were served in a beautiful blue ceramic bowl, showing no hint of their simple nature.

Yu Nian sat at the table and didn’t hesitate to pick up his chopsticks and take a bite.

“Aren’t you eating?” he asked Qi Wang.

Qi Wang shook his head. “I’m not hungry.”

Yu Nian didn’t press further.

He was indeed hungry, having eaten very little at night, been in an accident at midnight, and spent the last two hours in high expenditure. He finished half a bowl in no time.

As for Qi Wang, even though he had just watched Yu Nian eat supper, he had disappeared somewhere now.

But after a while, Qi Wang returned. Yu Nian didn’t pay much attention; he was still considering whether to stay the night or leave after finishing the noodles.

Suddenly, he felt his ankle being grabbed.

He froze and looked down.

Qi Wang was half kneeling, one knee on the ground and the other bent, holding a pair of gray socks and helping him put them on.

Seeing Yu Nian looking over, Qi Wang explained softly, “The heater in this house doesn’t seem very warm. Your hands felt cold to me, so I found some socks. They’re new, never been worn.”

But Yu Nian wasn’t concerned about that.

He put down his chopsticks, feeling suddenly unable to eat.

Memories burned like a hot iron in his throat, making it impossible to swallow and impossible to heal.

Qi Wang stood up again, went to wash his hands, and wanted to ask if Yu Nian wanted hot milk, but when he came back, he saw Yu Nian looking at him with red eyes.

Qi Wang was startled. “What’s wrong?”

Almost instinctively, he hugged Yu Nian.

Yu Nian used to look particularly small in his arms, but now that he had grown taller, he was still very light to hold. Qi Wang even felt the protruding bones on Yu Nian’s elbow.

“Where does it hurt?” Qi Wang frowned, pressing his hand on Yu Nian’s stomach. “Is your stomach hurting again?”

But Yu Nian couldn’t speak.

He couldn’t say where it hurt; he was hurting all over.

He should push Qi Wang away, just like a moment ago, when he was considering whether he should leave.

But now, he was leaning against Qi Wang’s chest, unable to do anything but curl up in a ball.

He wanted to grab Qi Wang’s neck and ask him, why are you treating me like this?

If you’re not good to me, you should stick to it.

Once you leave me, you shouldn’t come back.

Then he could continue to hate him forever, always feeling that this person named Qi Wang was despicable and contemptible.

But Qi Wang had come back.

As if he had never left, still the same as before.

This made him ache all over, as if a broken puppet was slowly being pieced back together.

He buried his face in Qi Wang’s shoulder, biting his lip tightly. He should strangle Qi Wang’s neck, like a vengeful water ghost.

But in the end, his arms slowly closed around Qi Wang, just embracing him.

He thought, he really shouldn’t have met Qi Wang again.

He had anticipated today.

That’s why he dared not let Qi Wang back into his life.

Eight years had passed, and he seemed imposing and aloof on the surface, but inside, he had made no progress. He was still the fool who followed Qi Wang’s every move with just a gesture.

This was simply pitiful.

Qi Wang’s voice was suppressed in his throat.

Although he didn’t know the reason, he seemed to understand why Yu Nian was crying.

His body stiffened, but after a moment, he gently stroked Yu Nian’s hair.

The room fell silent.

The New Year’s hustle and bustle had faded away, leaving only desolation and emptiness in the world.

He held Yu Nian, listened to Yu Nian’s suppressed sobbing, and felt as though his heart was being pierced a thousand times over.

He had a moment of wavering.

He thought he could make up for his mistakes, but his presence seemed to only increase Yu Nian’s pain.

Yu Nian didn’t lose control for too long.

He wiped his face and sat up from Qi Wang’s embrace.

He was still sitting on Qi Wang’s lap. When their eyes met, his eyes were red and his nose was red too, just like the young master who used to cry when bullied.

He asked Qi Wang, “Listen, Qi Wang, I don’t always say these things. Now I ask you, is there anything you want to say to me about what happened eight years ago?”

He stared at Qi Wang closely. “Is there nothing you want to explain to me?”

Qi Wang was stunned.

His arm around Yu Nian’s tightened unconsciously.

What should he explain?

Should he say he left Yu Nian because he was forced to? He didn’t accept the compensation, and when he left, he only took the gifts Yu Nian had given him.

But no matter what role Yu Nian’s siblings played in it, in the end, he was the one who chose to leave.

He was the one who inflicted long-lasting pain on Yu Nian.

The issues between him and Yu Nian were no longer just about a breakup from eight years ago, but about the eight years of separation.

Perhaps if he revealed everything, the blame on him in Yu Nian’s eyes would be lighter.

But wouldn’t that be a form of coercion?

He didn’t accept the compensation, so Yu Nian should go easy on him and forgive his betrayal?

Was that it?

Yu Nian’s relationship with his siblings had just been repaired. Did he want to be the executioner and watch Yu Nian’s family fall apart?

Moreover.

He had made deals with Yu Xinli and Pei Zhao.

He begged Yu Xinli and Pei Zhao not to reveal his troubled past to Yu Nian.

He didn’t want Yu Nian to know what kind of person he used to be.

Yu Xinli and Pei Zhao agreed.

And now, judging by Yu Nian’s tone, Yu Xinli and Pei Zhao had kept their promise.

He couldn’t unilaterally break that agreement.

Qi Wang’s Adam’s apple rolled, and he couldn’t speak for a long time.

He held Yu Nian’s hand, gently rubbing his fingertips over Yu Nian’s fingers.

He remembered something else Song Yunchun had told him.

Two years after he left, Yu Nian was indeed still looking for him.

But by the fourth year, Yu Nian gave up.

He left a message for Song Yunchun, “If you ever contact Qi Wang, please tell him I’ve given up. I don’t love him anymore, I won’t look for him anymore, and I don’t want to see him again in my life.”

At first, Song Yunchun hid it from him, but later, he told him.

This caused him to have nightmares for half a year afterward. He didn’t know if he should appear in front of Yu Nian again. He bought countless plane tickets but never boarded a flight.

He whispered to Yu Nian, “I have nothing to defend for myself. I left you because I was too weak back then, which led to the current situation.”

“For eight years, I’ve told myself countless times that if you were doing well, if you had a new life, a new love, then I shouldn’t intrude into your life. No one should be trapped by a failed first love for a lifetime.”

“But now you’re single, you have no partner. Can I have a chance?”

“I’m not asking for your forgiveness. Eight years is too long, and I know I’m no longer the person in your memory. You may find me repulsive, or maybe you have no feelings for me anymore.”

“But no matter what, can you let me stay by your side? Whether you use me as a bed warmer or a tool to come and go at your beck and call.”

“When you meet someone new and no longer want me, just discard me, and I won’t cling to you.”

This was his only wish.

This was his so-called “fresh start.”

He just wanted to accompany Yu Nian for a while longer. If Yu Nian could finally let go of the shadows of his youth and bury them together with the past.

Then he would gladly accept it, without resistance.

Yu Nian’s expression became extremely strange.

He stared at Qi Wang and chuckled, “Is this what you want to tell me? How magnanimous of you, ready to abdicate at any moment.”

He looked out the window and remembered all those years when he searched for Qi Wang all over the world.

He almost turned China upside down.

He waited at the gates of C University.

He looked at the face of every student because he remembered Qi Wang saying he wanted to study at this university.

Many voices appeared in his ears.

Pei Zhao’s voice, “Yu Nian, actually, Qi Wang back then…”

Song Yunchun’s voice, “Xiao Yu, this matter is actually my fault, I’m sorry, truly sorry. Qi Wang, he didn’t…”

His sister’s voice, “Nian Nian, we were wrong, but don’t punish us like this…”

The voice of the owner of the art supply store, “Qi Wang, I haven’t heard from him, little friend.”

Many voices mingled together.

On this quiet night, it was deafening.

For many years, he had heard these noisy voices in his ears, causing him countless sleepless nights.

He had suffered many grievances.

In the last few years before Qi Wang left, they accumulated to the point of almost bursting his heart.

But now, as he looked at Qi Wang, he couldn’t say anything.

Yu Nian took a deep breath.

He thought, it’s the first day of the new year, and he should actually give himself a gift, not go against his own will, regardless of whether he might get deeply involved.

He resumed his indifferent and fearless demeanor, even smiling at Qi Wang.

“Sure,” he said, “I can let you stay by my side for now. When I get tired of you, then you can leave.”