#24

“Yes, that’s correct. Yisol-ssi and everyone else are all artists working with me.”

“How could I possibly gain more popularity when I receive the same support as everyone else, despite having less talent than them? I’m not satisfied at all. I really think it would be better for you to reconsider my proposal.”

As Nam Yisol spoke, he slowly reached out toward me. I carefully caught his approaching hand, stopping him. Then, I knelt on both knees and looked up at Nam Yisol, who was sitting on the sofa.

When I stopped his hand, Nam Yisol, who had looked sullen, suddenly showed a flash of surprise on his face.

“Yisol-ssi.”

“……Yes? What is it?”

Hearing my serious tone, Nam Yisol flinched under the blanket he had curled himself into. He was probably worried that I would be angry.

But at this moment, I had no intention of blaming or getting angry at him.

Of course, if I were to judge whether what Nam Yisol did today was right or wrong, it was clearly wrong. It wasn’t something I could just let slide. However, even knowing all of that, I wanted to have a conversation first rather than scolding a kid who spoke so calmly about doing this because he lacked talent.

“Honestly…… I don’t know. I don’t understand what you’re thinking when you say those things, or why you believe you lack talent.”

“I don’t have any particular thoughts about it. I simply evaluated myself objectively. Compared to the other members of Tartarus, I’m not talented. That’s just a fact.”

Seeing Nam Yisol speak such sorrowful words with an expression that suggested he wasn’t hurt in the slightest, I slowly lowered my gaze. My heart felt heavy. I had no idea where to even begin unraveling this.

“This is my first time in the entertainment business. As you said, I don’t have an eye for recognizing talent. In this industry, I’m still inexperienced and lacking. The only thing I have is money. Maybe that’s why? No matter how much I try to understand, I just can’t comprehend why you judge yourself that way. The Yisol-ssi I’ve seen has always sung and danced on stage with pure happiness.”

During the past week, while Tartarus was hospitalized, I had watched and listened to all their albums, music videos, live performances, dramas, and variety show appearances. As their agency head, I felt it was my responsibility to at least know what kind of songs my idols performed and what kind of stage presence they had.

And in every performance I watched, Nam Yisol sang and danced with a face that radiated joy, as if he couldn’t be happier. It was a feeling too genuine to be faked. He truly loved being on stage.

“Maybe it’s because I saw that side of you, but I honestly don’t know how to respond to what you’re saying right now. Since I’ve never stood on a stage myself, I can only vaguely guess that your emotions exist in a realm I can’t understand.”

“……”

“In this situation, there is only one thing I can say to you. I will think through this with you and work hard alongside you.”

At my cautious words, an expression of bewilderment appeared on Nam Yisol’s face.

“Think through what?”

“Everything.”

“Everything?”

“Yes. Why you judge yourself so harshly, how we can make your dream of gaining more popularity come true, and how I should properly scold you for sneaking into someone else’s bedroom without permission. All of it.”

Nam Yisol blinked at me in disbelief, then suddenly bent over and burst into laughter.

“Hahaha!! What am I going to do with our president? Normally, wouldn’t you just say you understand in situations like this?”

“Saying I understand something I truly don’t would be deception.”

“You’re way too honest!”

Nam Yisol clutched his stomach and laughed for a long time—so long that I started worrying he might wake the others sleeping upstairs. Should I ask him to lower his voice? I hesitated, considering whether to stop him, but just as I made up my mind, Nam Yisol’s laughter ceased. With teary eyes, he looked at me, and I seized the opportunity to speak again.

“Yisol-ssi.”

“Yes?”

“I am going to do my best for you and Tartarus. I truly mean that.”

I watched as Nam Yisol, still catching his breath from laughing so much, gradually calmed down.

“Could you promise me just two things in return?”

“What kind of promises?”

“That you will never use your body as a tool again. And that you will never sneak into someone else’s room while they’re sleeping to tease them.”

As soon as the word ‘tease’ left my lips, Nam Yisol’s face twisted. The drastic shift in expression made it hard to believe he had been laughing just moments ago. He remained still for a moment, lost in thought, before slowly unwrapping the blanket from around his body and kneeling down in front of me.

“I’m sorry for what I did.”

It was a sincere apology. His stiffened expression only added to the weight of his words.

I was so taken aback by the sudden change in his demeanor that I couldn’t respond immediately, my eyes widening in surprise. Seeing my reaction, Nam Yisol gave a bitter smile.

“I know I acted disrespectfully toward you. I won’t ask you to understand me. I won’t ask for forgiveness either. But…… would you at least allow me to explain why I did it?”

Just moments ago, he had been full of mischief, but now he was exuding an earnestness I had never seen before. I was momentarily thrown off by the unfamiliar expression but eventually nodded, granting him permission.

“Thank you for giving me a chance. First of all, the reason I came into your room today…… it was a kind of test.”

“A test?”

“Yes. A test to see if you’re the kind of person who would take advantage of us, or if, even if you wouldn’t do that now, you might act differently in the future depending on the circumstances.”

I noticed his hands, resting on his thighs, tighten into fists. His knuckles turned white from the pressure, and for some reason, that sight filled me with a sense of pity.

“I’m sorry. I know I’m in no position to be testing you. But…… but I had no choice. I was desperate. Sir, until now…… no, all of us have been living at the bottom of hell. The lowest place possible, with nowhere further to fall. We were treated like objects, and the only thing we had left, the one thing we held onto with everything we had, was our own bodies. No matter how much President Lee Yongjun hit us, starved us, screamed at us, or threatened us, that was the one thing we refused to give up.”

“……”

“For him, that was enough. Among the kids under his control, we made him the most money. So, in his own twisted way, he never forced us into anything we absolutely refused. It was probably just because he didn’t want to kill the golden geese, but still, we were grateful for it.”

Nam Yisol’s words carried a quiet bitterness, and I bit the inside of my cheek hard. The taste of iron filled my mouth.

“But you’re different, sir. You’re not like President Lee Yongjun. We can’t be your golden geese because you already have everything. You lack nothing. If you ever wanted to force something on us, we would have no way to protect ourselves. That’s why…… that’s why I tested you. The only thing I have to use as bait is my looks, so I tried using that.”

“Wait, hold on, Yisol-ssi.”

“I’m sorry. To be honest, if you had given in, I was planning to use that against you. No matter how powerful a corporate chairman you are, a scandal with an idol—or even worse, a same-sex scandal—wouldn’t be easy to cover up. I was going to use that as leverage to protect my members.”

My members.

I flinched at those words. Why did it sound like he wasn’t including himself in that statement? Was I imagining it, or……

“I actually thought you’d fall for it. At most, I expected you to insist on being the one in control. Everyone I’ve ever met was like that. That’s the kind of life I’ve lived, where people like you were all the same. I was stupid to think that way.”

“……”

“You must be really angry, right? Disgusted? I was incredibly rude to you. I’m truly sorry. No matter how much you punish me, I’ll accept it. After all, someone who does bad things deserves to be punished.”