Chapter 12: Jealous

In the spacious room with soft lighting, a large white wall displays an oil painting featuring a man.

The man is seated, wearing a black eye mask that conceals half of his exquisite face. His hands are restrained by a stethoscope, and a partially unbuttoned white coat hangs on his arm, revealing a black shirt underneath.

Perhaps feeling uncomfortable, his slender and fair neck tilts slightly backward, resembling a daytime swan.

The stark contrast between the pale skin and the black shirt creates a visually striking image.

This exquisite painting is framed as if imprisoning the handsome man within, like a caged bird nurtured within.

Adjacent to it, half of the blank wall is covered with photos depicting the man in various scenes—wearing a white coat during a medical examination, selecting products while shopping, and even in class.

The only change is the transformation of the man in the photos, evolving from a slightly naive and restrained appearance four years ago to a gentle maturity, akin to a ripening peach becoming sweeter with time.

In this room filled with curiosity and desire, it unfolds like a captivating web, gradually expanding.

Having appreciated his own creation, Fu Xingran walks towards the other side of the wall.

On the other half of the wall, there’s a large glass cabinet displaying nearly a thousand bottles of perfumes, mostly luxury ones. Among them are numerous exquisitely crafted vintage glass bottles, their liquids shimmering with vibrant hues in the light.

Each position in front of the glass bottles has a label with a date, and most of them mark special commemorative days like Western Valentine’s Day, traditional Chinese Qixi Festival, and symbolic dates like 520. The remaining dates are December 13th, September 22nd—the day they first met—and September 27th—the day of their second encounter.

September 22nd is the day they met.

September 27th is the day they met again.

January 15th is Su Lixu’s birthday.

There are currently 29 bottles of perfume for January 15th, symbolizing the 29 birthday gifts he prepared for Su Lixu.

Originally, he planned to continue making them until Su Lixu returned, and then gift all the perfumes to him. Fortunately, he didn’t have to wait long for Su Lixu’s return.

So, during the four years when he couldn’t find Su Lixu, he made perfumes for him on every special occasion, including their anniversary and Su Lixu’s birthday.

He had thought that if he didn’t appear in this world, if he couldn’t be by Su Lixu’s side, these perfumes would serve as the gifts he didn’t have the chance to give.

Fu Xingran officially met Su Lixu, who was twenty-six, when he was sixteen, much later than he should have.

Gently opening the glass door, Fu Xingran takes out one of the perfume bottles, the August Night Osmanthus from the Lutens Glass Paper series.

He gently sprays it on his neck, and the sweetness of honeyed osmanthus combined with the woody frankincense embraces him like a warm autumn breeze. It’s this scent that saved him in his moment of despair on the twenty-first-floor rooftop.

—Don’t let go!

The desperate plea, the hands holding onto him, and the fragrance of August Night Osmanthus make him reconsider thoughts of giving up on the world.

Especially in the year he turned sixteen, Su Lixu, his psychological counselor, guided him out of the years of confusion, struggle, and panic. Since then, the scent always brings tears to his eyes.

But more than that, it’s addictive.

No one knows the deeper meaning of this addiction, not even his father, who wonders why he insisted on Su Lixu being his psychologist. Even Su Lixu himself doesn’t understand why he liked him from the very first moment.

In his bag, by his pillow, in his car – he always keeps this bottle of perfume.

Like an exposed admiration in broad daylight, the shy excitement of being observed thrills him. With the fragrance of August Night Osmanthus on him, it’s like shouting to everyone passing by him, “This is the scent of the person I love.”

This is Su Lixu’s scent.

This is the scent that keeps him alive.

When his father says he’s really lost his mind over this perfume, he doesn’t deny it because he truly has lost his mind over Su Lixu. Now that Su Lixu has appeared, he forgives him for suddenly disappearing. However, if Su Lixu leaves him without a word again, he’ll truly be angry.

As long as Su Lixu doesn’t leave him, he will give him the fullest love in the world because in his eyes, there will only be Su Lixu, and no one else.

Fu Xingran tightly grips the perfume bottle, slowly turning to face the wall adorned with a portrait of Su Lixu. He gazes at his beloved man, his eyes filled with devotion.

Finally, he can present this cabinet full of perfumes to his beloved.

“Fu Xingran.”

A stern reprimand suddenly echoes at the door, but Fu Xingran doesn’t respond.

He places the perfume back into the cabinet, then takes a bottle of perfume he crafted himself – something he learned from a teacher for a long time to create a scent that resembles Su Lixu’s.

Thinking of giving it to Su Lixu when he finds him.

“Do you realize what you’re doing right now?” Mr. Fu strides into the room, standing beside Fu Xingran with a grim expression. It’s hard for him to face this room; losing this guy would drive him mad. This place is like a forbidden zone: “Xingran, I’ve said it many times, what you’re doing is illegal. If Dr. Su finds out, what do you think he’d feel about you? He’d be scared. Why he left you four years ago, don’t you understand!”

A stern rebuke erupts in the room, like a spark to a fuse.

Fu Xingran’s sidelong glance meets Mr. Fu’s, his eyes full of vigilance and hostility, like a hedgehog, completely rejecting this man’s approach: “Do you have the right to control me? You can just ignore me like you did back then, throw me into a mental hospital, anyway, you don’t care about me in any way.”

This is no longer the obedient one in front of Su Lixu.

The sarcastic words ignite the fuse, sparking an imminent confrontation between father and son.

Mr. Fu’s chest heaved up and down; he restrained his anger, but the events of the past made him lack the confidence to discipline Fu Xingran. Now he worries that his request to Su Lixu might be another mistake, fearing it could lead Su Lixu into another dilemma.

Thinking about Su Lixu’s advice not to discuss treatment with Fu Xingran, but if he doesn’t, this guy won’t realize he’s in an extreme state of obsession. He can’t let Fu Xingran go; he’s too dangerous.

The walls filled with paintings and photos are evidence, as well as the cabinets full of perfumes. It’s shocking and disturbing.

As a father, he can’t let his child continue like this. This unhealthy love disgusts him.

“It seems you still think it would be better if I died with Mom back then,” Fu Xingran sensed his father’s silence, laughing, “Putting an end to it all, so no one can say you have a son with mental problems.”

Mr. Fu, hearing this, furrowed his brows and couldn’t help raising his voice, “Nonsense! When did I say you brought shame?” Realizing his tone was too harsh, he consciously slowed down, “Xingran, Dad promised to be with you. Whatever you want, Dad will give you. I’ll keep my word.”

“I want Su Lixu.”

“Besides Su Lixu.”

The father and son’s simultaneous response led to a moment of silence as they locked eyes.

Fu Xingran said, “I only want Su Lixu; I can do without everything else.”

Mr. Fu felt his headache intensify, “Fu Xingran, let me tell you, love isn’t obtained through improper means. Look at all these paintings and photos on your walls; you prefer hiding these things rather than openly pursuing someone. This isn’t love; you just think Dr. Su resembles Mom, right?”

“I can distinguish.”

Fu Xingran walked to the massive portrait, lifted his head as if gazing at his own deity. His eyes gleamed, envisioning the scenario of pulling down the deity from the altar, profaning it.

“Mom gave birth to me, Su Lixu is the one who made me live. I’m clear about that. Mom is gone, and I can’t be without Su Lixu.”

Fu Xingran’s hand gently touched the portrait, fingertips coinciding with Su Lixu’s hand in the image. Curled fingers, interplay of light and shadow, as if holding onto that hand.

Just like back when he was about to jump from the twentieth floor, and Su Lixu held his hand.

“I need to tell him; I can’t live without him. I would have died without him.”

Mr. Fu had mixed feelings, “What if Dr. Su doesn’t like you? Will you act foolishly?”

Fu Xingran turned to look at his father, “He will like me; I guarantee it.”

These were extremely firm and assured words.They locked eyes for a moment.

Finally, Mr. Fu broke the silence, sighed, and reluctantly conceded, “Then promise me, you can approach him, but you must not harm Dr. Su.”

Fu Xingran looked at the portrait again; how could he ever harm Su Lixu? He was his savior, his deity, the rose he wanted to carefully nurture.

“How could I ever harm him?”

Mr. Fu sighed in resignation, then walked to Fu Xingran’s side, handing over two keys and an access card, “Take these.”

Fu Xingran lowered his head to see the romantic words on the access card.

“Last time, didn’t you say you wanted to live in the romantic district? It’s close to your school, right? Dad bought you the one you wanted, unit 1204. It’s fully furnished, and Auntie has already cleaned it. You can move in whenever you want.”

Fu Xingran took the keys and card.

“If you ever feel uncomfortable, you can consult Dr. Su more. Don’t keep it to yourself, and don’t scare people. Pursuing someone requires sincerity,” Mr. Fu noted the apartment his son had been talking about, thinking it was just a simple preference without knowing the reason.

Fu Xingran replied nonchalantly, “Okay.”

A faint smile spread across his eyes, as if he had completely satisfied something.

After speaking, holding his own perfume, he turned and left, footsteps hurried as if in a rush.

Mr. Fu behind watched Fu Xingran leave, then turned to glance at the walls filled with Su Lixu in this room, his expressions and smiles all concealed in this room for a whole four years.

Finally, he sighed, shifted his gaze away, and slowly closed the door.

“In just a few games, you twisted your waist, Su Lixu. Looks like you can’t accept aging.”

Outside the romantic apartment building, two men supporting each other could be seen from afar.

Su Lixu took a sharp breath, feeling unbearable pain in his waist. He pressed He Shi’s hand and stopped walking, “Let’s take a break. I feel like I can’t straighten my back.”

Seeing Su Lixu’s pale face, He Shi furrowed his brows, “How about getting an X-ray at the hospital?”

“I can’t walk there now. Just walking back from the court downstairs has exhausted all my energy. You better help me get back,” Su Lixu felt quite unlucky today, managing to strain his back while catching He Shi’s ball.

He Shi, thinking about how Su Lixu fell while catching the ball, lowered his head and checked his ankle, “Is your ankle okay?”

Su Lixu shook his head, “I think so.”

He Shi glanced at him helplessly, “I really can’t believe you. Come on up.” After saying that, he turned and squatted in front of Su Lixu.

Su Lixu was stunned, “There’s no need to carry me; my foot is fine.”

“Who knows if there’s any problem with that move you just made. We’re not twenty-year-old guys anymore; you’re already thirty.”

“Thirty isn’t that old.”

“Don’t linger, come up quickly. Even at thirty, I can probably only carry you a few steps. Let’s cherish the moment, Su Lixu.”

Unable to resist He Shi’s persistence, Su Lixu could only lie on his back, and when He Shi exerted force on his foot, his brows involuntarily furrowed. Could it be that the fall just now not only twisted his waist but also his foot?

He Shi carried Su Lixu towards the entrance of the apartment. Suddenly, not far behind them, an envious gaze was fixed on them.

Fu Xingran tightly held a black gift bag in his hand, redness in his eyes as he watched the two closely interacting. Who is that man? Why can he carry Su Lixu on his back, just moments ago they were even holding hands, it all looks like flirtatious behavior, doesn’t it?

Could it be that his Dr. Su is in a romantic relationship?

Could that man be his lover?

What are they planning to do now?

Are they going to be shameless in broad daylight?

No, this can’t be, it’s not allowed. How could his Dr. Su fall for someone else?

Endless suspicions plunged him into anxiety, the discomfort in his chest felt like needles poking at him, denying and affirming over and over.In the end, he followed them.

He needed to find out.

At that moment, cries of pain from Su Lixu echoed in the living room.”… He Shi, be gentler!”

“I just lightly touched it.” He Shi squatted in front of Su Lixu and touched the slightly swollen area on his ankle. Perhaps due to his fair skin, the bruise was particularly noticeable. “You lie down first, put your foot on the cushion, and I’ll get an ice pack for you to prevent it from swelling more later.”

Su Lixu obediently lay down. Now, he felt that his back wasn’t as painful, but his ankle hurt more.

He Shi walked to the kitchen and casually glanced at the west-facing balcony next to it. This area was used for the washing machine, dryer, and drying clothes. However, he noticed a baseball jersey hanging there, which didn’t seem to match Su Lixu’s style.”

When did you start liking these baseball jerseys?”

Su Lixu, seeing He Shi coming out with an ice pack from the kitchen, asked, “When did I start liking baseball jerseys?”

“I saw a baseball jersey hanging on your west balcony, and I thought it was yours.”

Su Lixu recalled Fu Xingran’s visit last week and the teasing look he exchanged with He Shi. Suddenly, he didn’t feel like explaining, “It’s for a student.”

He Shi raised an eyebrow, “So, it’s the boy from last time who called you brother and seemed to catch you in the act? He seems quite tall.”

Su Lixu didn’t catch He Shi’s implied meaning, thought about it seriously, and said, “Seems a bit taller than you.”

He Shi, placing the ice pack directly on the swollen area of Su Lixu’s foot, commented, “Do I need to compete in height with a little brat?”

“…Then why did you use so much force?” Su Lixu winced in pain as he sat up, then looked at He Shi’s hand on his ankle, contemplating whether to push it away but hesitated.

“Could it be that patient you mentioned before? If it is, you’re getting too close. Don’t blame me for not warning you.” He Shi sensed Su Lixu’s hesitant gaze, instantly understanding that this guy was about to push him away. He released the hand holding the ice pack, sat on the sofa, and said, “Even if he’s your first patient, it does seem somewhat meaningful from a certain perspective, but can such a relationship lead someone to come to your home? Moreover, you only have one bed, right? When did your cleanliness obsession become selective?”

Su Lixu replied, “…I don’t know.”

But somehow, it was miraculous. When He Shi touched his ankle just now, he wanted to push away, but he restrained himself. When Fu Xingran was there, he didn’t even think about this quirk.

“Do you want me to massage your back?”

Su Lixu heard He Shi’s question and shook his head, “No need, not serious. It’s an old issue. I’ll apply an ice pack in a while, and it’ll be fine.”

“You’ve never told me when you got this back.

“The living room clock struck noon with a “ding.” A woodpecker in the small wooden house beneath the clock popped its head out and pecked at the structure with a sound that felt like it was knocking on the heart.

Su Lixu remained silent.

Seeing Su Lixu with his head lowered in silence, appearing somewhat sorrowful, He Shi sensitively caught that he might have said something he shouldn’t have. “Sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have asked.””The day Liyang left, after I came out of the hospital, I went straight to the Sky Restaurant on the twentieth floor of the Mochen Group. I thought living alone in this world was meaningless.”

He Shi looked at Su Lixu in surprise.

“At that time, there weren’t many people in the restaurant. When I went in, I saw a very thin boy climbing to the rooftop. Without thinking, I rushed over and pulled him down. I injured my back when I lifted that boy.”

“Su Lixu, you…” He Shi hesitated.

Su Lixu met He Shi’s concerned eyes couldn’t help but laugh, “I’m fine now. Don’t worry about me blindly. Actually, I regretted going up to the twentieth floor. Besides, I saved a kid. He also saved me. I became clear-headed and realized I was confused at that moment.”

As for why he had cleanliness issues, it was because his younger brother, Su Liyang, jumped off a building and died in front of him. He was too emotionally distressed, and several nurses had to forcefully restrain him. It was those hands that made him feel an instant rejection both physically and mentally.

It wasn’t a major issue; he just didn’t like others touching his hands since then.

Except for Fu Xingran.”Su Lixu, and you didn’t tell me?”

Listening to He Shi’s gentle reproach, Su Lixu, with eyes lowered, looked at the ice pack on his ankle, “So, I hope everyone around me can be well and healthy. The past is the past. As long as we’re alive, everything will be okay.”

Including Fu Xingran.