Chapter 5: You count to twenty seconds and I will appear in front of you

“Dr. Su, the doughnuts you made are really delicious.”

Su Lixu looked at the empty plates in front of him. He made over a dozen doughnuts, and this guy ate seven of them, even finishing a plate of pasta. He couldn’t help but sigh that young boys can really eat.

“Back when you were in the hospital, you didn’t like eating much and were quite thin. It seems your appetite has improved a lot now, no wonder you’ve grown so much taller, even taller than me.”

Fu Xingran laughed brightly, “Because I want to grow up quickly, don’t want to be easily bullied anymore. Eating more helps me grow taller.”

Su Lixu met Fu Xingran’s smile and couldn’t shake the feeling that this bright smile seemed unreal for some reason.

Although he used to be Fu Xingran’s attending physician, they were no longer in a doctor-patient relationship. Trying to analyze someone else’s psychology casually was inappropriate.

Yet, based on professional sensitivity, he could still sense something subtle about Fu Xingran.

This guy somehow gave him a watertight feeling.

“Professor Su, can I take the remaining doughnuts with me?” Fu Xingran pointed to the few remaining doughnuts in the kitchen, eagerly asking.

“Of course, they were made for you in the first place,” Su Lixu smiled.

“Thank you, Dr. Su.”

“Feeling quite full, aren’t you? Want some tea to help with digestion?” Su Lixu stood up, intending to make tea for him

.”No need, Dr. Su, I have to go.”

“Hmm?” Su Lixu was about to fetch tea, caught sight of Fu Xingran pressing his stomach casually, his brows slightly furrowed. “Do you have classes in the afternoon? Should I take you back?”

Fu Xingran discreetly withdrew his hand from his abdomen, smiling, “No classes, but I feel like going back to sleep.”

Su Lixu thought this guy might be feeling stuffed, but since he didn’t mention it, he didn’t want to bring it up either. He nodded understandingly, “Sure, I’ll take you back then.”

He then went to the kitchen, put the remaining doughnuts into a small box, and handed it to Fu Xingran.

“No need, Dr. Su, I’ll walk back myself. Consider it a digestion stroll.”

Su Lixu sensed Fu Xingran’s strong desire to leave, feeling that his attitude had changed. Refusing the offer to be escorted back to school or the apartment, which is not within walking distance from the school, at least three or four kilometers away.

Is it that he feels uncomfortable after eating too much?

He escorted him to the door, intending to see him off downstairs.

“Dr. Su, you don’t need to accompany me, I can go down by myself.” Fu Xingran raised his hand to block the door frame, looking at Su Lixu with deep eyes. “Now, we are no longer in a doctor-patient relationship. Can I call you often and come to your place for meals in the future?”

Su Lixu paused for two seconds, then replied, “Of course, I welcome you anytime.”

Fu Xingran, as if receiving a promise, smiled brightly. “That’s great, Dr. Su. I’ll leave now and won’t disturb you. See you next time.” With that, he bowed deeply to Su Lixu before leaving.

Unbelievably well-behaved.

If his roommate saw this version of Fu Xingran, he would surely be surprised. This is no longer the proud and aloof Fu Xingran.

Su Lixu watched the door slowly close, standing silently in the entryway.In his case, Fu Xingran was a very special presence.

Borderline personality disorder is a severe emotional disorder that requires a considerable amount of time to treat. Initially, Fu Xingran actively sought his help and agreed to undergo hospitalization, although that treatment was eventually forcibly interrupted.

Has the situation improved now?

He then realized he was delving into thoughts he shouldn’t. Fu Xingran is no longer his patient, and he shouldn’t analyze things from that perspective. This encounter was just a chance meeting.

They are just ordinary acquaintances now.

At the moment he closed the door, thunder suddenly roared outside, rain pouring down without warning.

Su Lixu gripped the doorknob, feeling a slight numbness on the left side of his chest, a bodily reaction triggered by the thunder. Simultaneously, he thought that Fu Xingran was most afraid of thunder.

Suddenly, the phone on the dining table rang. He walked over, picked it up, and saw it was Fu Xingran calling – the contact information they exchanged earlier. He slid to answer.

“Hello?”

“…Professor Su.”

A trembling, fearful voice came from the phone, accompanied by the sound of rain, sounding particularly pitiful.

Su Lixu knew that Fu Xingran was terrified of thunder. Back then, he used to cope with the fear by slowly scratching his wrist with a pen tip when it thundered, eventually calling Su Lixu when he couldn’t endure it anymore.

He walked out quickly while holding the phone. “Where are you now? Did you go far? If not, come back to my place.”

“… My clothes are wet, and the doughnuts are wet too. I’m scared because of the thunder.”

“First, tell me where you are?” Su Lixu grabbed the large umbrella at the entrance, pushed the door open, and stepped outside.

“Downstairs by the flower bed.”

“Wait for me downstairs, I’ll come down to pick you up.”

“… I’m afraid my legs will go weak, and I won’t be able to walk.”

“Count to twenty, and I’ll be there.”

Su Lixu put down the phone and ran quickly to the elevator. He stared at the floor numbers with a furrowed brow. As soon as the elevator door opened, he stepped in.

Dark clouds gradually spread, and the rain became heavier.

“… 12, 13, 14…”

Not far from downstairs by the flower bed, Fu Xingran squatted, drenched like a drowned rat. He was trembling in pain, almost nauseous from stomach discomfort. However, he clung tightly to the doughnuts in his arms, his vision blurred by the rain, but he kept his eyes fixed on the apartment door.

Originally, he didn’t want to leave, but he ate too much, feeling like he was going to vomit. Yet, he didn’t want Su Lixu to see him vomit or think that he was not doing well. He was already fine – his current image was that of someone who had already recovered.

Very sunny, cheerful, and lively.

No longer the crazy person who used to cry and make a scene.

But thunder struck, and he was terrified. He couldn’t move; he had to ask Su Lixu for help. He decided to consider the discomfort after being caught in the rain, even if he ended up vomiting and looking miserable. He would have an excuse to stay at Su Lixu’s place.

Su Lixu’s place only had one bed, so if he just begged a bit, Su Lixu might hug him to sleep and even comfort him to sleep.Thinking this way made the fear of thunder seem a bit less.

“… 20.”

“Xingran!”

Fu Xingran suddenly looked up. He saw Su Lixu walking towards him in the pouring rain, holding a black umbrella, like a beam of light piercing through a crack. His eyes instantly lit up.

“…Dr. Su.”

But the moment he stood up, intense discomfort surged in his stomach. Unable to bear it any longer, he turned his head and vomited into the flower bed.

“Xingran!” Su Lixu, seeing Fu Xingran suddenly vomiting, became anxious. He held the umbrella over Fu Xingran’s head, not caring about himself. He saw Fu Xingran, soaked through, with an extremely pale face. “What’s wrong? Are you feeling unwell?”

Fu Xingran was still vomiting.

Su Lixu quickly patted his back, waiting patiently for him to finish.

“…Dr. Su.” After Fu Xingran finished vomiting, he turned to look at Su Lixu, his face not looking good. This tall young man, in discomfort, looked pitifully subdued. “I vomited.”

Su Lixu took out a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped Fu Xingran’s mouth. Then, he supported him with an arm under the umbrella, leading him back. “It’s okay. Let’s go upstairs and talk.”

After walking a few steps, Fu Xingran suddenly hugged him.

The black umbrella fell to the ground, creating ripples in the accumulated water.

The rain thoroughly soaked their clothes. The late autumn rain was chilly, and only the pressed bodies transmitted a hint of warmth.

“…What’s wrong?” Su Lixu was caught off guard by the weight on him, and he, too, was suddenly soaked.

“The doughnuts are wet.” Fu Xingran, hugging Su Lixu tightly from behind, buried his face in Su Lixu’s shoulder, choking up, “You made these for me, and the rain is too much.”

The rain was too loud, and the distance between the two was too close. Su Lixu clearly heard Fu Xingran’s distressed voice, and a hint of helplessness crossed his eyes. It seemed this guy was still as easily aggrieved as he used to be.

“I can make them again; it’s okay. Let’s go upstairs first, or else we’ll catch a cold.”

“It’s not the same if they’re gone.” Fu Xingran wrapped his arms around Su Lixu’s shoulders. “Dr. Su, do you know how much I’ve missed you all these years? You probably don’t know; I miss you so much, I miss you so much.”

The rain almost swallowed up this continuous murmur, but it couldn’t drown out the intense and fervent emotions within.

“I want to bite you.”

A large, warm hand stroked his chest.

Almost like a reflex, Su Lixu felt a twinge of pain at his chest.

“Don’t be afraid of me, okay?” Fu Xingran, not hearing Su Lixu’s response, spoke softly, “I was wrong. I shouldn’t have bitten you. It hurts, doesn’t it?”

“Xingran, you—”

Before Su Lixu could finish, Fu Xingran hugged him tighter, as if trying to melt him into his embrace, the force stealing even his breath.

The rain intensified.

Fu Xingran’s breath fell in his ears, scorching hot.

“I’m only addicted to you. I’ve only bitten you. I’m a good boy. Don’t leave again, okay?”

Fu Xingran felt the nausea rising again, but he was afraid Su Lixu would push him away, so he kept repeating, holding onto him tightly.

Su Lixu let out a faint sigh.

This thing, much like the bite mark on his left side, couldn’t be removed because it was too deep.

It was like the three characters “Fu Xingran,” and mentioning it would reflexively cause pain.

“Go back and take a hot shower, or you might catch a cold later.”

At home, Su Lixu urged Fu Xingran to take a shower and handed him a set of home clothes.

Fu Xingran, dripping wet, with hair clinging to his forehead, looked at Su Lixu, who was also soaked. “Dr. Su, why don’t we shower together? You’re wet too.”

Without hesitation, Su Lixu pushed him into the bathroom and closed the door.

He didn’t leave immediately but stood at the bathroom door without moving until he heard the sound of water inside.

Inside the bathroom, Fu Xingran stood under the shower, gazing at the bathroom door. He let the hot water wash over him, unable to tell if he was crying, perhaps he was.

But it was tears of joy.

In just five minutes, he finished showering and stepped out of the shower.

He stood in front of the mirror, looking at himself. On his fair skin, there were dozens of scars, some old, some new. Finally, his gaze fell on the tattoo on his left chest – an abbreviation.

—SLX

He tattooed it in front of his heart, the same place where he had bitten Su Lixu. And this spot would be touched by this name as long as his heart kept beating.

“Xingran, are you done showering?”

Su Lixu’s voice came from outside the bathroom.

Fu Xingran sat on the toilet lid, leaned against it, and then feigned weakness, “Professor Su, my stomach hurts so much, I can’t stand up. Could you come in and help me?”

His Professor Su was so gentle, surely he wouldn’t refuse to help.

Come in and push the door open.