Chapter 7: You have to hug me or I’ll get angry

Su Lixu walked out of the bathroom, rubbing his hair, only to find Fu Xingran on the bed, tightly hugging the blanket and already asleep – a somewhat insecure posture.

Approaching the bed, he gently brushed Fu Xingran’s forehead with the back of his hand, confirming the normal temperature before carefully pulling the blanket away. However, his hand, along with the blanket, was embraced, and he awkwardly sat on the edge of the bed.

“Brother.”

Su Lixu intended to retract his hand, but Fu Xingran’s unintentional murmurs in his sleep made him pause, and he gazed at Fu Xingran’s sleeping face.

Compared to four years ago, the face, caught between youth and adulthood, had undergone a transformative change, appearing more mature. The rebellious eyebrows slightly lifted, revealing a touch of heroism, and the corners of the eyes seemed faintly red, perhaps from crying.

Maybe having a bad dream, Fu Xingran pursed his thin lips, looking stubborn yet childish.

“Brother, don’t leave… I’ll behave.”

As Fu Xingran pressed his cheek against Su Lixu’s hand and softly rubbed against it, the seemingly coquettish gesture softened Su Lixu’s heart. Unintentionally, his gaze focused on Fu Xingran’s tightly pursed lips, recalling that day.

On that rainy evening when he was about to leave, Fu Xingran, frightened by thunder, clung to him, shaking violently, insisting that he hold him.

“Brother, hug me. I’m scared. Just hug me…”

Even in the midst of voice changing, Fu Xingran’s voice remained soft, with a pitiful plea, making it hard to resist.But he never expected Fu Xingran to bite him.

A frenzied bite, as if wanting to bite it off, staining his white shirt with blood, and the pain blurred his consciousness. After that, every time Fu Xingran saw him, he begged to be hugged and bitten, displaying various coquettish and tantrum behaviors.

“Dr. Su, I keep thinking about biting you here. Am I a pervert?”

He knew Fu Xingran was just sick back then, and as a doctor in a mental hospital, he couldn’t scold him.

Now, however, he was soft-hearted.

Su Lixu carefully withdrew his hand, adjusted the blanket, and smoothed Fu Xingran’s messy hair. “Go to sleep.”

Just then, he heard a phone ring, subconsciously glancing at the bathroom, and walked towards it. The sound came from the laundry basket, and picking up Fu Xingran’s pants, he found the incoming call displayed a single word:

—Fu

Fu Xingran has no siblings, only a father, so this should be a call from Mr. Fu. Could there be something urgent involving Fu Xingran?

He answered the phone, but before he could introduce himself, he heard Mr. Fu’s stern voice on the other end scolding, “Fu Xingran, where did you go? Didn’t I tell you I would pick you up after school today?! We agreed to see Dr. Zhang, and if you refuse again, no doctor can help you! I’m waiting for you at the school gate; come back immediately!”

Go see a doctor?

Su Lixu frowned upon hearing this term, realizing that Fu Xingran was still under medical care. He replied, “Mr. Fu, hello, this is Su Lixu. Xingran vomited after getting caught in the rain and is now resting, feeling unwell.”

Mr. Fu fell silent on the other end, then after a few seconds, he asked, “Dr. Su? You… you’re back?”

“Yes,” Su Lixu responded.

“So, Xingran is with you now?”

“Yes, he’s resting as he feels unwell after getting caught in the rain.”

Mr. Fu fell silent again, and after a moment, he said, “Dr. Su, could we meet? I’d like to talk to you about Xingran.”

Su Lixu chuckled silently, “Mr. Fu, I think I can decline your request. I’m not Xingran’s attending physician anymore, and I’m not a psychiatrist now. I may not be able to help you much.”

Another moment of silence on the phone.

“Dr. Su, I know I may not have respected you enough back then, but I had my reasons. I hope you can give me a chance to explain and apologize. Also, considering Xingran has already met you, I think it’s necessary to discuss his current situation with you. I don’t want Xingran to cause trouble for you, Dr. Su.”

Perhaps Mr. Fu’s tone was too serious; Su Lixu sensed that the situation might be more severe than he perceived.

After a brief silence, he agreed, “Okay.”

“Where can I find you?” Mr. Fu asked.

Su Lixu thought of the cafe downstairs in his apartment, “I live in Cloud Up Romance No. 5 Apartment. There’s a quiet cafe here.”

(At the cafe)

“Then that night when Xingran bit you, I saw it.”

With a clatter, the spoon fell back into the cup, and coffee splashed. Su Lixu’s eyelashes trembled as he looked at Mr. Fu in astonishment.

Suddenly, it seemed like he understood something.

“After you fainted, I gave Xingran a good beating,” Mr. Fu continued, “I told him that you, Dr. Su, saved his life. Now that he’s learned to control his emotions, he shouldn’t bully you. You leaving was because he bit someone. Dr. Su would be angry, and he should know that.”

Su Lixu stared at Mr. Fu, wanting to speak but hesitating.

“So, this is why Fu Xingran left, as he claimed?”

Mr. Fu seemed to sense Su Lixu’s anger in his tone. After a few seconds of silence, he thought, ‘Did I not explain it clearly? Clearly, I’m just afraid my son will bully the doctor.’

“Xingran is my son, and I know his temper well. I apologize for lying to you. I’m sorry here. Your treatment is effective, but I don’t want effective treatment to be based on you getting hurt. That wasn’t my intention in finding a doctor for him. It’s not about undermining your professional competence; in fact, I think you’re very capable. I just didn’t want Xingran to engage in extreme harmful behavior.”

Su Lixu furrowed his brow.

“Dr. Su, I also need to tell you that in the years you were away, Xingran’s suicide attempts increased. He’s no longer satisfied with expressing his emotions through tantrums; now, he vents by hurting himself. On the day you left, he hurt himself all over, nearly bleeding too much for us to save him.”

After hearing this, Su Lixu thought of the wounds on Fu Xingran’s chest that he glimpsed earlier…

He hadn’t been mistaken.

“I understand that my actions back then were selfish for Xingran, but I had no other choice. Xingran is my son, and I couldn’t watch him causing unnecessary harm to another innocent person. But now, I have no other option. You’re back, and I can only beg you to save Xingran; he only listens to you,” Mr. Fu earnestly requested, his gaze sincere.

Su Lixu met Mr. Fu’s deep and steady eyes, realizing that this man was now appealing to him as a father.

But in the end, he had made a mistake.This well-intentioned lie caused greater harm to Fu Xingran, who now saw him as someone who didn’t keep promises—a villain.

It also caused him harm.

“I can assure you that if Xingran bullies you, you tell me, and I’ll handle it. At the same time, I can promise, aside from covering treatment costs, to provide you with three conditions within my capabilities. Of course, I understand that, besides matters of life and death, there are limits to what I can control in this world.”

Mr. Fu finished speaking but received no response. He looked into Su Lixu’s calm eyes and for a moment felt like he was talking to himself.

Su Lixu remained silent for a moment, then chuckled softly, “Mr. Fu, you still don’t understand. Xingran’s issues are not something money can solve, and now, my help won’t resolve them either.”

“When I told you back then, Xingran had entered mid-term treatment, and the results were clear. Yet, you insisted that his inpatient treatment showed no improvement, believing I wasn’t qualified. Even if your true intention was to protect me, fearing he might threaten me, you didn’t say that initially. The harm to Xingran and me has already been done.”

“Even if Xingran may harm me, as a doctor, I’m responsible for my patients. These situations are what we anticipated when becoming psychiatrists. So, Mr. Fu, as I said when you mentioned interrupting the treatment, even if it’s a more authoritative and professional doctor than me, for individuals with borderline personality disorder, establishing a stable relationship and trust with the doctor is more challenging than the treatment itself.”

Mr. Fu didn’t expect Su Lixu to say this. His light laughter seemed mocking, and for a moment, he felt embarrassed.

“To be fair, I appreciate your consideration and the goodwill behind this lie. However, the secondary harm caused to Xingran and the harm to me, I hope you understand in your heart. Please clarify this with him, it must be clear.”

Facing the eyes of the man in front of him, Mr. Fu’s amber-like pupils revealed a chilly resolve. This handsome and charming appearance wasn’t as fragile as he had imagined.

Su Lixu withdrew his hand from the cup’s rim, smiling faintly, “And I am no longer a psychiatrist; I don’t have the right to diagnose or prescribe medication for Xingran. Now, I am just a psychological counselor at the university.”

“Also, unless Xingran actively seeks my help and needs my assistance, I won’t view him through the eyes of a patient again.”

Mr. Fu looked at the smiling Su Lixu, his eyes filled with a cold meaning beneath each smiling sentence, subtly criticizing him.

It inevitably reminded him of the young Su Lixu’s firm attitude when advising him not to change doctors casually. Standing before him, logical and persuasive, without any timidity, she told him the consequences, not fearing him at all.

Su Lixu said, “I hope you can give him more patience and company, less blame, so you won’t regret it later.” After speaking, he nodded and left.

Don’t be like him, regretting when it’s too late.

With a “beep,” fingerprint unlocked, Su Lixu pushed open the door, and while taking off his shoes in the entrance, he saw Fu Xingran walking out, eyes red.

Su Lixu leaned on the cabinet, looking surprised at Fu Xingran. “Why are you crying?”

Fu Xingran walked up to Su Lixu, arms on either side of him, enclosing him in a tight embrace. “I thought you disappeared again. I couldn’t find you. Do you not want me anymore?”

This big boy standing in front could feel the pressure of the tall figure, contrasting sharply with the vulnerable emotion of fearing abandonment at this moment.

Su Lixu sighed, “I just went out to take out the trash.”

“I don’t care. You left me. Even for a second, you left.” Fu Xingran buried his head in Su Lixu’s shoulder, muffled, “You have to hug me, or I’ll be angry.”